TV Review: The Girl From Plainville Episodes 1-3 (dir by Lisa Cholodenko and Zetna Fuentes)


With The Dropout scheduled to air its final episode next week, Hulu is moving on to another 8-hour miniseries about another young blonde woman who was at the center of a media firestorm.  The Girl From Plainville stars Elle Fannie as Michelle Carter, a teenager who was convicted of more or less goading her “boyfriend,” Conrad Roy (played by Colton Ryan, who was one of the few good things about Dear Evan Hansen) into killing himself.

It was a case that got a lot of attention and Michelle was, for a few months, everyone’s favorite heartless villain.  She was eventually convicted of manslaughter and, after several appeals, was eventually sentenced to 15 months in prison.  She served 11 and is currently free.  She’s 25 years old and has already experienced not only prison but also being briefly the most hated person in the country.  And yet, for all the attention that she received, no one has ever been able to determine just why exactly she told Conrad Roy that he should kill himself or why she went as far as to order him to do so, even after he said he had changed his mind.  There was a lot of speculation that Conrad perhaps thought that he and Michelle had a suicide pact, one that Michelle didn’t follow through on.  It’s also undeniable that, after Conrad’s suicide, Michelle made herself the center of attention.  Before her final text messages to Conrad were discovered, Michelle organized a charity softball game in his memory.  Of course, she held the game in her hometown instead of Conrad’s and apparently, she went out of her way not to involve any of Conrad’s friends or family in her efforts.  Could Michelle have pressured Conrad to kill himself just so she could use his death to be the center of everyone’s attention?

The first three episodes of The Girl From Plainville dropped on Hulu earlier this week and they certainly suggest that Michelle could be capable of doing it all for the attention.  At the same time, they also suggest that Michelle herself probably didn’t truly understand what she did or why she did it.  As played by Elle Fanning and Colton Ryan, both Michelle Carter and Conrad Roy come across as two people who didn’t have much of a connection with reality.  Conrad, or Coco as his friends and family call him, wants to escape a home life that is dominated by the constant bickering between his divorced parents.  He’s at his happiest when he gets a summer job working on a fishing boat and he’s miserable when he has to return to the “real” world, where he’s anxious around people his own age and he’s constantly being used as a pawn in his mother and father’s never ending battles.  Meanwhile, Michelle is so detached that she has to watch an episode of Glee in order to come up with something to say after Conrad’s suicide.  Conrad’s family is earthy, loud, and working class while Michelle’s family is reserved and wealthy but both families have raised children who feel like permanent outsiders.  Indeed, it seems almost preordained that they would eventually find each other and both Colton Ryan and Elle Fanning do a good job of bringing Conrad and Michelle to life.

That said, as I watched the first three episodes of The Girl from Plainville, I did find myself wondering if there was anything more to say about this case.  After the endless news coverage, one Lifetime movie, one HBO special, and countless “ripped from the headlines” episodes of Law & Order: SVU, are there any new insights left to be gleaned from the story of Michelle and Conrad?  With a story this terrible, one’s natural tendency is to search for a deeper meaning but is there really one there?  What if, for all the speculation, Michelle really was just a heartless monster who manipulated Conrad into suicide because she knew she could?  In short, is there enough here to really justify spending 8 hours with someone like Michelle Carter?

I guess we’ll find out over the upcoming few weeks.

Film Review: The Bubble (dir by Judd Apatow)


Meh.

The Bubble is the latest film from Judd Apatow.  Taking place during the first year of the COVID pandemic, it follows a small group of actors as they attempt to make the sixth installment of the Cliff Beasts franchise.  The spoiled, pampered, and pretentious actors find themselves isolated, not allowed to go anywhere other than the set or the hotel.  The film becomes a disaster as the actors are driven mad by all the rules and the inconvenience that comes along with trying to make a film in the middle of the global pandemic.  When the studio hires a security team to keep anyone from escaping, things get only dumber.

Even by the standards of what we’ve come to expect from Judd Apatow, The Bubble is a notably messy and self-indulgent film.  It’s a bit of a shame really because there’s much about the Pandemic that not only deserves to be satirized but also needs to be satirized.  For much of society, satire will be an important step on the road back to sanity.  Unfortunately, the humor in The Bubble often falls flat because Apatow doesn’t seem to really be sure what his main target is.  Is he targeting COVID hysteria?  Is he targeting the pampered rich people who treated the pandemic like a two-year vacation while people who actually lived paycheck-to-paycheck were risking their health just so they could pay their bills?  Is he targeting bad action movies or pretentious indie directors or actors who think that the world revolves around them?  When Maude Apatow shows up as a TikTok star who has been given a role because she has 2,000,000 followers, is Apatow aiming at the shallowness of social media or is he poking fun at the older generation that can’t understand the kids and their wild and wacky ways?  Apatow seems to be going after everything and everyone but, at the same time, he also expects us to care about these characters when they start demanding to be allowed to leave the set.

The film’s action doesn’t really follow any sort of real storyline.  Instead, it feels like a collection of skits, all piled on top of each other and all dragging on for a bit too long.  Though The Bubble is shorter than the average Apatow film, it’s still over two hours long.  After the first hour, the film suddenly becomes obsessed with random dance scenes.  Usually, I love random dance scenes but, in this case, there’s really no humor or point to them beyond saying, “Wow, these people suck at dancing.”  It’s funny the first time but, by the fourth time, it starts to feel a bit lazy.  The film is like the improv student who, instead of building on the situation and working with his scene partners, just shouts out whatever pops into his head and begs the audience for a laugh.  The film does end on what would be a clever touch if not for the fact that it’s all pretty much lifted from the final scenes of Tropic Thunder.

Lest anyone think that I’m totally trashing the film, I did chuckle a few times.  There’s a recurring bit with Kate McKinnon’s studio exec constantly being at either the beach or on safari.  That made me laugh.  And Keegan-Michael Key, as an actor who has written a spiritual guide, delivers the majority of his lines with just the right amount of self-importance.  For the most part, though, The Bubble falls flat.  This is not the Netflix film to watch this weekend.

TV Review: The Walking Dead 11.14 “The Rotten Core” (dir by Marcus Stokes)


I’ve always wondered how little Herschel would react when he eventually met Negan and learned that Negan was responsible for killing Glenn.

I mean, we all knew that it would happen eventually because, let’s face it …. Maggie and Negan are totally in love!  It’s going to take them a while to admit it, of course.  Maggie’s busy ruling Hilltop like a dictator and Negan’s got a new wife.  Plus, there’s the whole thing where Negan savagely murdered Glenn and then spent a few seasons gloating about it.  I mean, it’s going to take a while to move on from all of that.  Taking all of that into consideration, Lauren Cohan and Jeffrey Dean Morgan still have more legitimate chemistry than anyone else on this show and Maggie and Negan are definitely in love.  Plus, they’re scheduled to get their own spin-off, where they both move to the most romantic city in America, New York!  Not only does that mean that Hilltop is probably screwed (because why else would Maggie leave) but it also means that Maggie and Negan are destined to fall in love while listening to Dean Martin sing That’s Amore.

And the question has always been, how would Herschel react?  Well, this week, we got our answer.  After discovering that bratty little Herschel had snuck into the Apartment Complex, Negan agreed to keep an eye on him while Maggie and the other Hilltoppers continued to fight off a combination of walkers and Commonwealth soldiers.  It didn’t take long for Herschel to figure out that Negan was the man who killed his father.  Herschel pointed a gun at Negan but was eventually talked out of shooting him, proving that Herschel is ready to forgive and it’s time to let the healing begin!

Just as Herschel was discovering that Negan killed Glenn, Darryl was discovering that the Commonwealth isn’t as much of a paradise as he perhaps originally thought.  He and Rosita was ordered by Sebastian to enter his old house and retrieve his cash.  The only problem was that the house was full of walkers!  In not very subtle terms, Sebastian threatened Darryl’s children.  Inside the house, Darryl and Rosita discovered that they were not the first people to be ordered into the House of Death.  There was also April, whose children were also threatened by Sebastian.  Apparently, threatening people’s children is Sebastian’s thing.  Fortunately, Carol and Mercer showed up to help.  Unfortunately, they still had to give the money to Sebastian because he’s Governor Milton’s son and, as a result, doesn’t have to face the consequences of his actions.

This was an okay episode, though it was hard not to feel that the whole thing with the Apartment Complex was a bit overextended.  The Complex invasion could have been wrapped up in one episode instead of stretching it out over two weeks.  That felt like a throwback to the days when almost every episode was Rick talking about something that he was going to do in a future episode as opposed to just going ahead and doing whatever needed to be done.  The Walking Dead has often had a bad habit of stretching things out a bit too far.  As far as the other subplot was concerned, we already know that Commonwealth is a bad place so devoting an entire episode to Darryl finally figuring it out felt a bit superfluous.

That said, the important thing is that this episode reminded us all that Negan and Maggie are totally in love, even if they won’t admit it.  Good for them.  The world may end but love never dies.

TV Review: The Dropout 1.7 “Heroes” (dir by Erica Watson)


This week’s episode of The Dropout was the most emotionally satisfying yet.

Seriously, after six episodes of Elizabeth and Sunny walking over their employees, lying to their investors, and basically getting away with all of it, it was deeply satisfying to watch everything start to unravel in episode 7.  Not only did Elizabeth and Sunny fail to kill the Wall Street Journal story about their fraud but, for once, their heavy-handed attempts at suppression made the situation worse for them.  Tyler Schultz refused to sign the new NDA.  Even if George Schultz is still too stubborn to admit that he was wrong about Elizabeth, he at least seems to suspect that he’s been played.  Even David Boies seems to be at the end of his limit as far as defending Theranos is concerned.  Perhaps that explains why he didn’t seem to be too upset when one of his associates made a very basic mistake that gave John Carreyou (well-played by Ebon Moss-Bachrach) the information he needed to keep his WSJ story alive.  Perhaps most satisfying of all was the scene where Phyllis Gardner finally got a chance to tell Elizabeth off to her face.  It was a stand up and cheer moment in a miniseries that, up until this point, has portrayed the world as being a very dark place.

This week’s episode also deserves a lot of credit for the perfect use of David Bowie’ “Heroes” over the opening montage.  Even when the proverbial walls closing on her and Sunny, Elizabeth still convinced a lot of people that she was a hero, a college dropout who has somehow managed to revolutionize the way that blood is tested.  To be honest, it was always too good to be true but, for many years, Elizabeth Holmes pulled it off.  Not only did she present herself as being a hero but she allowed her investors to feel that they were also heroes for supporting her.  As the song says, “We can be heroes …. if just for one day.”

This episode of features several clip of Elizabeth Holmes being fawned over by the members of the political and media establishment.  Cleverly, the show digitally inserted Amanda Seyfried into actual footage of Holmes being interviewed and praised by old men like Bill Clinton, Joe Biden, and Charlie Rose.  As the miniseries has made clear, Elizabeth Holmes’s biggest boosters were all older men.  Women easily saw through her but men like George Schultz, Ian Gibbons, and others took on an almost fatherly role with her.  When Tyler asked George if he secretly wished that Elizabeth was related to him instead of Tyler, George didn’t answer.  He didn’t have to.

On one final note, I do hope that this episode will be viewed by the people responsible for Inventing Anna because this episode’s portrayal of journalism and a working newsroom feels exciting authentic in a way that Inventing Anna doesn’t.  Unlike the neurotic and needy characters at the center of Inventing Anna, John Carreyou gets the story through his own hard work and he fights for the story because he knows that it’s true.  LisaGay Hamilton’s performance as Carreyou’s editor was one of the highlights of the episode and her scenes with both Moss-Bachrach and Kurtwood Smith were fun to watch.  They left the viewer wanting to know more about the character.  Indeed, one of the things that The Dropout does so well is that it creates the impression that everyone on the show is worthy of their own miniseries.  I would happily watch a show about Carreyou and his editor.

The Dropout finishes up next week as Elizabeth and Sunny finally face the consequences of their own bad actions.  I can’t wait!

Music Video of the Day: Want You Back by HAIM (2017, dir by Jake Schreier)


Wow, a Haim walking video that wasn’t directed by Paul Thomas Anderson!  In all honest, though, Jake Schreier did a fine job directing this video and it’s a good song as well.

Enjoy!

Some things are long forgotten
Some things were never said
We were on one endless road
But I had a wandering heart

I said we were opposite lovers
Said it from the beginning
You kept trying to prove me wrong
Said you’d always see it through
And I know that I ran you down
So you ran away with your heart

But just know that I want you back
Just know that I want you back
Just know that I want you
I’ll take the fall and the fault in us
I’ll give you all the love I never gave before I left you
Just know that I want you back
Just know that I want you back
Just know that I want you
I’ll take the fall and the fault in us
I’ll give you all the love I never gave before I left you

I know it’s hard to hear it
And it may never be enough
But don’t take it out on me now
‘Cause I blame it all on myself

And I had a fear of forgiveness
Said it from the beginning
I was too proud to say I was wrong
Said you’d always see me through
All that time is gone, no more fearing control
I’m ready for the both of us now

So just know that I want you back
Just know that I want you back
Just know that I want you
I’ll take the fall and the fault in us
I’ll give you all the love I never gave before I left you
Just know that I want you back
(Just know that I want you)
Just know that I want you back
(Just know that I want you)
Just know that I want you
I’ll take the fall and the fault in us
I’ll give you all the love I never gave before I left you
(Just know that I want you back, baby)

Just know that I want you back
Just know that I want you back
Just know that I want you
I’ll take the fall and the fault in us
I’ll give you all the love I never gave before I left you
Just know that I want you back
Just know that I want you back
Just know that I want you
I’ll take the fall and the fault in us
I’ll give you all the love I never gave before I left you

Just know that I want you back
Just know that I want you back
Just know that I want you
I’ll take the fall and the fault in us
I’ll give you all the love I never gave before I left you
Just know that I want you back
(Just know that I want you)
Just know that I want you back
(Just know that I want you)
Just know that I want you
I’ll take the fall and the fault in us
I’ll give you all the love I never gave before I left you
(Just know that I want you back, baby)
(Just know that I want you)
(Just know that I want you back, baby)
I’ll take the fall and the fault in us
I’ll give you all the love I never gave before I left you

Film Review: Windfall (dir by Charlie McDowell)


I really hate home invasion movies.

Seriously, it’s always the same thing.  Some mysterious stranger breaks into an empty house and hangs out for a few days, trying on clothes and smoking cigars and drinking whatever’s available in the refrigerator.  Eventually, the couple who own the house comes home.  They get held hostage.  The stranger wastes a lot of time trying to be intimidating.  The husband always tries too hard to take control of the situation.  The wife tries to keep everyone calm.  The stranger is poor.  The husband is rich.  The stranger and the wife form a connection.  Secrets are revealed.  Blah blah blah.

Don’t get me wrong.  There have been a few good home invasion movies.  There are some directors who can pull it off and make a film compelling despite telling an overly familiar story.  Ruggero Deodato brought some life to the genre, with a little help from David Hess and Giovanni Lombardo Radice, in The House At The Edge of the Park.  For the most part, though, the home invasion genre has led to some of the stagiest and most dramatically inert films ever made.

Consider Windfall, which premiered on Netflix earlier this month.  Starring Jason Segel, Lily Collins, and Jesse Plemons, the film has a talented cast.  It’s directed by Charlie McDowell, who previously made a very intriguing  film called The One I Love.  Like Windfall, The One I Love was largely confined to one location but, unlike Windfall, McDowell still managed to use that location to craft an intelligent and compelling film that never felt stagey.  The house in which Windfall takes place is lovely to look at.  The film has many of the ingredients to be a success but it doesn’t have a particularly clever or even interesting script and, as such, it falls flat.

Segel, Collins, and Plemons play three characters who aren’t actually given names.  Segel plays the home invader, who is credited as being “Nobody.”  Plemons is the CEO, a billionaire who is responsible for putting people out of work and who makes his employee signs NDAs.  Collins in the Wife, who is secretly taking birth control pills.  Segel may be a criminal but he’s not a very good criminal, as becomes clear as he continually finds himself being manipulated by his hostages.  Plemons is selfish and never stop talking down to Segel, even when the latter is pointing a gun at him.  Collins claims that she works very hard at running a charity that her husband set up but it’s obvious that she and and her husband have a strained relationship, even before Segel shows up.  There’s a few heavy-handed attempts at social relevance, with Segel and Plemons debating whether or not Plemons deserves to be a billionaire.  The film ends with a twist that Godard or Bunuel could have pulled off but here, it just falls flat.  The action is just too predictable and dramatically inert for Windfall to be anything more than a movie about three talented performers acting up a storm while trying to bring three boring characters to life.

Windfall is a very much a film of its time, both in its focus on inequality and it’s minimalist style.  Like Malcolm and Marie, it’s the type of one-location, small crew film production that was popular at the height of the COVID pandemic and the CEO and his wife heading to their vacation home to hide out from the world will undoubtedly remind some viewers of the wealthy people who were able to isolate themselves during the early part of the pandemic.  So, the film has some historical value if not much dramatic value.  In the end, Windfall serves as a reminder that, when combined with Malcolm and Marie, Netflix has pretty much cornered the market on pretentious, one-location films.

Music Video of the Day: You Know I’m No Good by Amy Winehouse (2006, directed by Phil Griffin)


Amy Winehouse, still missed. Her music touched my life. Her death broke my heart. Fortunately, her voice can still be heard.

I used to search for excuses to sing this song. Needless to say, my vocals were not quite as effective.

A Few Random Thoughts On The Oscars


Let’s just be honest about this.

No matter what else you or I might have to say about the Academy Awards, the only thing that anyone is going to remember about this year’s ceremony is Will Smith walking up on stage and slapping Chris Rock.  That’s it.  That’s what these awards are going to be known for.  Whenever this ceremony is written about in the future, the accompanying picture won’t be of the cast and crew of CODA.  Instead, it’ll be Will Smith slapping Chris Rock.

The Slap, itself, was unpleasant to watch.  Will Smith sitting back down in his chair and continuing to shout at Chris Rock was unpleasant to watch.  It left me feeling awkward and uncomfortable and I was just watching it on TV.  I can only guess what it was like the celebrities sitting in the auditorium.  You know that they were probably terrified that something unexpected would happen with the vote for Best Actor.  At that moment, there was probably a lot of worry about what would happen if Andrew Garfield pulled off an upset.

Will Smith, however, did win Best Actor.  After making a few “fierce protector” excuses, he did, eventually, get around to apologizing to the Academy and “my fellow nominees.”  He also did a lot of God talk and I’m not sure if it’s a good idea to mention God twenty minutes after slapping someone on national TV.  He mentioned that Denzel Washington had apparently taken him aside and warned him that the Devil would come for him at the height of his success.  Which …. I mean, okay.  The thing is, Will Smith is 53 years old and he’s been a star longer than I’ve been alive.  By this point, the Devil should have moved on to someone else.

A few notes on the rest of the show:

It was good to see the show taking place in a theater, as opposed to a train station.  Just by using an actual theater, this year’s Oscar ceremony was a significant improvement over the previous year’s.

The hosts were pretty boring.  There was nothing gained by having three of them.  Amy Schumer needs to fire whoever picked out her first outfit.  If Schumer picked it out herself, she needs to hire someone to pick out her outfits.  Regina Hall looked lost.  Wanda Sykes was okay but that museum segment bogged down the whole show.

CODA is a likable film and it’s obvious that the audience appreciated its heartwarming approach more than the emotionally detached style of The Power of the Dog.  The fact that this tiny little indie film managed to defeat the expensive Netflix slate was gratifying in a David vs. Goliath sort of way.  CODA, if we’re going to be honest, really does feel more like a made-for-TV movie than a feature film but I think that, emotionally and mentally, people were just ready for a positive movie that wouldn’t leave them feeling disturbed or depressed.  After two years straight of pandemic panic, voters were perhaps not inclined to honor a film that ends with its main character dying on anthrax poisoning.

Dune swept the technical awards and ended the night with the most Oscars.  Dune II is probably going to win Best Picture.

Troy Kostur’s acceptance speech was definitely the most moving part of the night.  It’s a bit of a shame that it’s going to be forever overshadowed by The Slap.

Politically, it was pretty much a typical Oscar ceremony.  At this point, I think anyone who cares enough to be offended by Hollywood’s liberalism has probably already stopped watching the Oscars.

As the Academy promised, the cut categories (i.e., the Oscars there were awarded before the start of the live show) were edited into and shown during the show.  They were awkwardly inserted, so that we would see the people in the auditorium reacting to a speech that was given two hours earlier.  It just came across as weird and fake and, whenever the hosts did anything, I found myself thinking, “They cut categories for this.”  Even a brilliant hosting trio would have suffered as a result.  In this case, you had Amy Schumer dressed like Spider-Man on live TV while the winner for Best Film Editing had to make due with edited highlights of his speech.

What’s hilarious is that, even with all of ABC’s new measures, this year’s Oscar run longer than the previous two years.  The total show clocked in at nearly 220 minutes.  For comparison, that’s 20 minutes longer than The Godfather, Part II.  Will Smith’s acceptance speech alone ran for seven minutes.  Of course, would you want to be the person tasked to tell Will Smith to wrap it up?

It was hard to tell but I guess Army of the Dead won the Twitter Poll and Zack Snyder’s Justice League won the Oscar Cheer Moment thing.  Even from just watching on TV, it was obvious how annoyed everyone in the auditorium was with them.  Personally, I have to respect the ability of the Snyder fandom to game the system.

The interpretive dance that went along with the In Memoriam segment was distracting and annoying.  If I’m ever included in a memoriam segment, I’m hoping there will be no gospel music and no interpretive dancing.

The Godfather tribute was nice but I wish they had gotten Sofia Coppola to do the introduction instead of Sean “Whatever” Combs.

In the end, the Oscars weren’t as much of a train wreck as I thought they would be but it was still a fairly unfortunate ceremony.  The category cutting didn’t sit well and I doubt I’ll ever be comfortable with that.  (It’s something that I hope will be abandoned in the future.)  This ceremony will always be known for The Slap and probably not much else.  I would say that I would hope the Academy and ABC would learn from this but the only thing they care about is ratings.  If the ratings are good, ABC will take the credit.  If the rating are bad, the Academy will get the blame.  Who knows what next year will bring?

Speaking of next year, that’s what I am now concentrating on!  There’s a lot of good movies coming out over the next few months and a whole new Oscar race to prepare for!  Let’s get to it!

Oscar Counter-Programming: Llamageddon (dir by Howie Dewin)


On a distant planet, the Llamas march through the desert, their eyes glowing red and their hearts full of murder.  One of the Llamas (played, according to the credits, by Louie the Llama) ends up in a trailer that turns out to be a spaceship.  And when that trailer gets off course and crashes onto Earth, it’s time for a Llamageddon!

A nice couple in the country spot the Llama standing on the edge of their property.  It must belong to the neighbors, they say.  They consider chasing the Llama back to its home but they decided not to.  After all, it’s about rain and who wants to chase a wet Llama in the rain?  Not me!

Later that night, the Llama claims its first two victims.

Well, you can see where this is going, right?

After the funeral of that nice couple, their children decide to throw a party at the house.  They call their friends and their friends bring beer, weed, and a lot of attitude.  However, the Llama brings the horror.  It turns out that the Llama can not only stomp you to death but it can also shoot red laser beams out of its eyes.  Soon, the party is in chaos as person after person falls victim to the Llamageddon….

(And one poor soul actually turns into Llama which is horrific in theory but kind of cute to watch.)

Llamageddon is a film from 2015 and it has a running time of 69 minutes.  (“Nice,” someone out there is saying.)  Considering that the end credits are padded with a rap and also a fast-forwarded presentation of the film that the viewer has just watched, I’m going to guess that running time was deliberate.  And actually, I respect that.  Llamageddon is a film that knows exactly what it is and it has a sense of humor about its very existence.  It’s a film that fully embraces the silliness of it all.

So, look …. I could sit here and I could go on and on about the acting and deliberately cheap special effects and the way that the film hints that even the cutest of animals can actually be deadly and dangerous but here is what you need to know.

It’s about a Llama from space and the Llama has the power to blow people up.

In other words, this is a film that was made for a very select audience of people who are amused by the idea of killer space llamas.  I happen to be one of those people so I enjoyed the film.  I respected the fact that the filmmakers stuck with their silly idea and they didn’t try to fool the viewers into thinking that the film was meant to be anything more than what it was.

Will you enjoy Llamageddon?  Well, like I said, it’s only 69 minutes and it’s specifically made for people who laugh out loud at the term “space llama.”  If, like me, you’re one of those people, check it out.  It’s on Prime and Tubi and if you’re currently watching the Oscars but you’re desperate for some counter-programming, you can watch it right now with the knowledge that the movie will end before the Academy Awards.

Lisa Marie’s Week in Television: 3/20/22 — 3/26/22


I didn’t watch much this week because I’ve been busy preparing for the Oscars.  Here’s a few thoughts on what little I did watch.

Allo Allo (Sunday, PBS)

Lt. Gruber thought that he spotted the ghost of Rene’s twin brother in the cemetery and was frightened for his life.  Of course, what we all know is that Rene never had a twin brother and instead, he’s been pretending to be his own twin brother after faking his death several seasons ago.  Somehow, no one on the show has figured this out yet or found it strange that Rene had to explain that both he and his twin have the same name.  Things only got more complicated from there, with Flick trying to disguise himself as a British spy and the Italian soldiers learning how to speak English.  Officer Crabtree still still thinks that he can speak French.  What I like is that, whenever he says “Good moaning,” all of the French characters respond with “Good moaning,” indicating that they are also mangling their French in sympathy for him.  That’s nice of them.  I’m also starting to get the feeling that those British airmen are never going to get out of France.

American Idol (Sunday and Monday Night, ABC)

ABC gave us two episodes of American Idol this week.  The auditions came to a close.  Because I was busy on both Sunday and Monday, it wasn’t until Tuesday that I watched both of the episodes on Hulu and I have to admit that it wasn’t long before I started to get bored and I ended up fast forwarding through some of the auditions.  From what I heard, some of the singers had good voices but there was still an overwhelming blandness to the whole thing.  Perhaps things will perk up in Hollywood.

Beyond the Edge (Wednesday Night, CBS)

The show is all about celebrities doing stuff in the jungle.  Aguirre, The Wrath of God, it is not.  So far, none of the celebs have had a breakdown and requested to leave the show so what even is the point?

The Brady Bunch (Sunday Afternoon, MeTV)

The Bradys went to a national park, laughed their way through a Native ceremony, and declared themselves to be The Brady Braves.  More like the Problematic Bunch, am I right?

The Dropout (Hulu)

I reviewed the latest episode of The Dropout here!

Full House (Sunday Afternoon, MeTV)

The Tanners and the Uncles are stranded at the airport on Christmas Eve and proceed to make life miserable for all of the other passengers.  Uncle Jesse gives a speech about the true meaning of Christmas.  Santa Claus is revealed to be a grumpy passenger who wears a toupee.  In a scene of maximum cringe, Danny falls asleep on the baggage claim carousel.  This was followed by three more episodes, all of which dealt with Jesse and Joey trying to work from home while Stephanie and Michelle demanded all of their attention.  DJ and Aunt Becky were the only characters on this show who ever seemed to worry about anyone else’s feelings.

The Love Boat (Saturday Afternoon, MeTV)

On Saturday’s episode, The Love Boat’s passengers included: Kim Darby, Howard Duff, Greer Garson, Lawrence Pressman, Louanne, and Jim Stafford.  To be honest, I didn’t know how the majority of those people were.  Greer Garson was a psychic.  Lawrence Pressman was a guy who used his best friend’s daughter to convince Kim Darby that he was a single parent.  In the episode’s serious plot, Isaac briefly went deaf.  It all worked out in the end.

The Office (All Week, Comedy Central)

On Sunday, I watched two episodes from season 1, both of which were classics of cringe comedy.  In Basketball, Michael challenged the warehouse to a game and Jim ended up getting punched in the face by Roy.  (Agck!  That was a lot of blood and, according to John Krasinski, it was real.)  Then, Amy Adams showed up at The Office to sell purses and Michael ran out to buy her a cappuccino machine.  Amy Adams deserved an Emmy for the look of horror she got in her face when Michael tried to flirt with her.  Will offices really let you sell purses out of their conference room?  I might actually check into that.

Open All Hours (Sunday Night, PBS)

This week, PBS aired the first ever episode of Open all Hours.  Granville looked younger and a smidgen less disgruntled than he did in later episodes.  He still seemed to be a bit of a ticking time bomb, though.

Survivor (Wednesday Night, CBS)

I wrote about this week’s episode here!  I enjoyed this week’s episode far more than I enjoyed the previous two episodes.

Talking Dead (Sunday Night, AMC)

Chris talked to Michael Biehn and Seth Gilliam, both of whom were absolutely charming.

The Walking Dead (Sunday Night, AMC)

I wrote about The Walking Dead here!

Now, on to the Oscars!