Adventures in Cleaning Out The DVR: The Perfect Girlfriend (dir by Curtis Crawford)

Posted on November 14, 2015 by Lisa Marie Bowman

After I watched and reviewed Stolen From The Suburbs, it was time to continue to clean out my DVR by watching The Perfect Girlfriend. The Perfect Girlfriend originally aired on the Lifetime movie network on September 27th. During that night, I was busy packing for my vacation and getting ready for sister Melissa’s birthday. And so, I set the DVR to record.

The Perfect Girlfriend is one of the many Canadian thrillers to eventually find a home on the Lifetime network. Lifetime movies are always designed to exploit our shared fears and fantasies. Stolen From The Suburbs, for instance, exploited the fear that moms have about not being able to protect their daughters. Online Abduction exploited a feeling that every daughter has had, that feeling of frustration that comes when your mom refuses to listen to you even though you’re the only person who knows what she’s talking about. And, of course, a countless number of Lifetime films have dealt with the fear that your boyfriend will suddenly turn out to be a complete psychopath.

The Perfect Girlfriend exploits the other great fear that we all have about boyfriends. Secretly, we fear that, while our boyfriend might be a genuinely sweet and nice guy, he might also be a lot dumber than we realize. We fear that, the minute he’s out of sight, he’ll end up getting targeted by the first woman who sees him. And, because he’s not that smart, he will be easily seduced and we’ll end up having to break up with him. (That, incidentally, is why most long distance relationships don’t work. Guys aren’t smart enough to be trusted when we’re not around.) And then his new girlfriend will turn out to be a totally controlling psycho bitch and really, we should be happy about that because he kind of broke our heart but we don’t want to see him get hurt because it’s really not his fault! He’s just not that smart…

The Perfect Girlfriend is all about that fear. Brandon (Jon Cor) gets a job in Portland and he leaves behind his devoted girlfriend, Jensyn (Ashley Leggat). Brandon tells Jensyn that he loves her and he promises that he’ll be faithful but we know better! As soon as he lands in Portland, his new boss, Simone (Adrienne Frantz), starts hitting on him. When his hotel reservations are mysteriously canceled, Brandon takes Simone up on her offer to just stay at her place for a few weekends.

(And, at this point, we all shout, “Brandon, noooo!” And then Jensyn says it’s okay and we all say, “Girl, I know you know better!”)

Brandon agrees to keep an eye on Simone’s dog but the dog doesn’t even seem to recognize her, almost as if Simone just picked the dog up from a shelter so she would have an excuse to keep Brandon at the house. Simone does tell Brandon that she has a boyfriend but Brandon never meets him. One night, Simone tells Brandon that she and her boyfriend broke up. Shortly afterward, Brandon gets a text from Jensyn, breaking up with him. Meanwhile, Jensyn gets a mysterious email from Brandon, also breaking up with her.

What could be happening…

Actually, you probably already guessed what’s happening. That’s right — Jensyn made the mistake of letting Brandon out of her sight and, as soon as that happened, Simone decided to pounce. And Brandon’s too stupid to realize what’s happening. So now, he’s living and sleeping with Simone while Jensyn struggles to get on with her life.

But, of course, Brandon still loves Jensyn. And when he starts to make an effort to get back in touch with her, Simone has a breakdown…

Anyway, The Perfect Girlfriend is pretty predictable but it’s kind of fun in a silly Lifetime sort of way. Nothing that happens will surprise you but if you love Lifetime movies (like I do), The Perfect Girlfriend is an enjoyable enough addition to the “My Boyfriend Is An Idiot” genre. If nothing else, it’s a film that will remind you why it’s important to never let your man out of your sight.

Adventures in Cleaning Out The DVR: Stolen From The Suburbs (dir by Alex Wright)

Posted on November 14, 2015 by Lisa Marie Bowman

After I watched 16 and Missing, it was time to continue cleaning out my DVR by watching Stolen From The Suburbs. Stolen From The Suburbs is a Lifetime film that originally aired on August 30th and I’m not sure why I missed watching it the first time that it aired.

If I had to describe Stolen From The Suburbs in one word, it would be intense. From the opening scene, in which two homeless teenagers are forcibly abducted by a man who pretended to be from a charitable organization to the film’s final violent stand-off, this is one intense film. While it has all the usual Lifetime tropes — rebellious daughter, overwhelmed single daughter, untrustworthy men, and hints of real-world significance — Stolen From The Suburbs is a hundred times more intense than your average Lifetime film. Indeed, this is one of the rare Lifetime films that ends without the hint that everything is going to be okay. While there are hugs at the end, there is no reassuring coda. The emotional and physical damage inflicted in Stolen From The Suburbs feels real and has real consequences.

Widowed Katherine (Cynthia Watros) and her teenager daughter, Emma (Sydney Sweeney), has just moved to the suburbs. Katherine is a loving mother and Emma is a good daughter, the type who even turns down a beer on the beach because she told her mother that she wouldn’t drink. However, when Emma meets the cute (and asthmatic) Adam (Nick Roux), she starts to resent her mother’s overprotectiveness. When Katherine finally says that she doesn’t want Emma hanging out with Adam, Emma responds by sneaking out of the house and never returning.

Desperately searching for her daughter, Katherine goes down to the mall and finds Emma’s cell phone tossed away in a dumpster. When she calls the police, Katherine tells them that Emma has been kidnapped. The unsympathetic detectives ask her if Emma has a history of running away and basically prove themselves to be useless. (The cops are always useless in a Lifetime film.) Katherine teams up with Anna Fray (Brooke Nevins), a missing persons activist, to find Emma.

What Anna tells Katherine is terrifying. Anna explains that teenage girls have been vanishing all over town. The police assume that they are runaways and make no effort to find them. In reality, though, the girls are being sold as sex slaves.

And that’s exactly what happened to Emma. Emma and several other teenage girls have been abducted and are now locked in a cage. In just a few days, they will be auctioned off to the highest bidder. Overseeing the entire operation is Milena (Oliva d’Abo).

As played by d’Abo, Milena is one of the great Lifetime villains. As she explains it, she was kidnapped herself and sold as a sex slave. However, she has now managed to take over the operation and takes obvious pleasure in putting others through the same torture that she suffered. Playing the role with an ever present smirk and a haughty cruelty, Olivia d’Abo is absolutely chilling as Milena.

Also giving a great performance is Cynthia Watros. (You may remember her as Libby on Lost.) Watros makes Katherine’s pain and desperation feel incredibly real and when she finally confronts Milena, it’s absolutely riveting.

Stolen From The Suburbs is an excellent Lifetime film. Keep an eye out for it!

Adventures in Cleaning Out the DVR: 16 and Missing (dir by Michael Feifer)

Posted on November 14, 2015 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Continuing my efforts to clean out the DVR, I followed up A Teacher’s Obsession by watching 16 and Missing. 16 and Missing originally aired on the Lifetime network on October 24th. On that particularly Saturday, I was haunting a Halloween party (booooo!), so I set the DVR to record it.

In many ways, 16 and Missing is a quintessential Lifetime film. It’s about a rebellious teenage girl who has a loving (and underappreciated) mother and a stepfather who is trying way too hard to serve as a replacement patriarchal figure. It also features an initially charming man who later turns out to be a complete psycho. There’s a lot of driving, an important life lesson, and a lot of gunplay. At the end of the movie, the mother is proven right and everyone hugs and strangely enough, nobody seems to be all that traumatized by all of the truly terrible things that have just happened to them. None of that, by the way, is meant to be a criticism. Lifetime movies are a genre all their own and part of the fun comes from their familiarity.

16 and Missing also deals with a common Lifetime movie theme — i.e., that the internet is an evil place that exists only to lead teenage girls astray. In this case, spoiled rotten Abbey (Lizze Broadway) has been using her social media accounts to carry on a two-year, online affair Gavin (Mark Hupka), who claims to be a 23 year-old cop. After Abbey has a fight with her mother, former FBI agent Julia (Ashley Scott), Abbey decides to run away from home. She sneaks out of the house, gets in her car, and drives off to Arizona…

And what immediately bothered me was the fact that Abbey didn’t pack anything before she ran way. Admittedly, this probably says more about me than the movie. I’m just saying that if I had ever run away from home and headed for a different state, I would have brought along a change of clothes.

But anyway, Abbey meets up with Gavin and is shocked to discover that Gavin is a little bit older than 23. And he might not be a cop. And his name might actually be Wesley. And, as soon as she shows up, Gavin/Wesley immediately starts pressuring her to have sex…

Okay, so it’s pretty obvious that Gavin/Wesley wasn’t everything that he said he was and, to the film’s credit, Abbey quickly figures this out. As opposed to a lot of similar Lifetime films (in which the teenage girl is always presented as being far too naive to be believable), 16 and Missing makes it clear that Abbey is a girl who made an impulsive mistake, who understands that she made an impulsive mistake, but who has now found herself trapped by that impulsive mistake.

However, Abbey and Wes-Gavin do have one thing in common. They both lost their fathers in the most violent and disturbing ways possible. Gavin’s father was a cop and Gavin claims that he was shot in the head by his partner. Abbey’s father was abducted and murdered while a 6 year-old Abbey helplessly watched. Could the two events be connected? It wouldn’t be a Lifetime film if they weren’t.

But don’t worry! After breaking into her daughter’s social media accounts, Julia is on the road to Arizona and she’s got a gun…

Anyway, 16 and Missing was an entertaining Lifetime film. If you’re into Lifetime films, especially ones that present the internet as being the root of all evil, you should enjoy this one. And if you’re not into Lifetime movies, you probably wouldn’t be watching in the first place.

Adventures in Cleaning Out the DVR: A Teacher’s Obsession (dir by Blair Hayes)

Posted on November 14, 2015 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Continuing my adventures in cleaning out my DVR, I followed up Girl Missing by watching A Teacher’s Obsession, a batshit crazy little film about … well, about a teacher’s obsession.

A Teacher’s Obsession originally aired on September 6th on the Lifetime network. Now, usually, whenever you see a Lifetime movie called A Teacher’s Obsession, you assume that the film is going to be about a teacher having sex with (or trying to have sex with, depending on the film) a student. But, in A Teacher’s Obsession, the teacher wants to be a student’s new BFF.

The student in question is Bridgette (Mia Rose Frampton), who is your typical spoiled upper middle class brat. Her mother, Candace (Molly Hagan), is a local politician. Bridgette makes it a point to always call her mother by her first name and always does so in the snarkiest tone imaginable. Bridgette attends a prestigious academy, where she’s the captain of the school lacrosse team. (What’s the deal with rich people and lacrosse?) However, Bridgette is failing her English class. As the film starts, Bridgette has just been put on academic probation. That means no lacrosse! And, even worse, Candace has forbidden Bridgette from seeing her boyfriend, Bobby (Dillon James).

Fortunately, there’s a new English teacher at the Academy. Her name is Jane (Boti Bliss) and — oh my God, Jane sure is crazy! In fact, Jane is so totally and completely crazy that you can’t help but root for her. That may sound strange but seriously, all the other teachers at the school are so boring and Bridgette is such a spoiled brat that you can’t help but think, Yay! Jane’s here to fuck things up!

The painfully boring (and bearded) calculus teacher, Mr. Jeter (Eric Curtis Johnson), has a crush on Jane and, when she has to, Jane has no trouble leading Mr. Jeter on. But the thing is, Jeter starts to get a little bit too needy and it all leads to this great scene where Jane totally goes off on Mr. Jeter in the teacher’s lounge. While the rest of the teachers sit around and listen like mummified relics of a past era, Jane tells Jeter that he’s overweight, that he has bad breath, that his beard is disgusting, and “your penis is miniscule.” Jeter sits there and listens, unaware that he has soup in his beard.

Jane may occasionally spend time with Mr. Jeter but she is far more interested in being Bridgette’s best friend. She encourages Bridgette to continue to see Bobby and even gives her birth control pills. She tutors Bridgette in English class. She conspires to help Bridgette cheat her way through Mr. Jeter’s class. Jane excitedly makes plans to get a tattoo with Bridgette. (“Do you think I’m too old for a tattoo?” Jane asks with a giggle.) When Bridgette gets a tattoo without inviting Jane to come with her, Jane goes crazy and accuses Bobby of trying to rape her.

And through it all, Candace has secrets of her own to hide. It turns out that Candace and Jane knew each other in the past. Jane used to be obsessed with Candace. Now, she’s obsessed with Bridgette…

A Teacher’s Obsession is one of those batshit crazy Lifetime movies that’s so unapologetically over-the-top that I couldn’t help but love it! Seriously, it was a lot of fun to watch Jane make spoiled Bridgette’s life difficult and Boti Bliss attacked the role of Jane with a ferocity that was truly admirable! Meanwhile, the underrated actress Molly Hagan brought unexpected depth to her role and the end result was an unexpectedly entertaining Lifetime melodrama.

Adventures in Cleaning Out The DVR: Girl Missing (dir by Joel Soisson)

Posted on November 14, 2015 by Lisa Marie Bowman

So, I recently turned on the TV, checked the guide to see if there was anything on worth recording, and discovered, to my horror, that I only had about 5 hours of recording space left on my DVR! Making matters ever worse was that the DVR was threatening to erase the two oldest recordings in order to make more space. Terrified at the thought of losing both Bend it Like Beckham and Jesus Christ Superstar, I realized that it was time to borrow a page from the Gary Loggins playbook and starting cleaning out my DVR!

I started things off by watching Girl Missing, a film which I recorded off of Lifetime on October 25th. (What was I doing on the 25th that required me to record the movie? I was at a Halloween party, dancing in my underwear and then getting soaked while running through the rain on the way back to the car. Or, at least, that’s what I think I was doing. My memory of that weekend is hazy, at best.)

ANYWAY — according to the IMDb, Girl Missing was originally entitled Forgotten but I imagine Lifetime changed the title to remind viewers of Gone Girl. The film opens with two hunters wandering across a frozen wilderness in the snow. I point this out because the film’s opening few minutes really are impressive and visually striking. The image of those two hunters wandering across that desolate landscape have an otherworldly feel to them. Eventually, the hunters come across something unexpected — a ten year-old girl has been abandoned in a ditch.

Flash forward ten years and that girl has grown up to be Jane (Francesca Eastwood). Jane has no memory of her life before she was found in that ditch. However, that starts to change when she’s contacted by Sylvia, a wealthy New York widow who claims to be her mother. Sylvia is played by Kiersten Warren, who once played Alex in Saved By The Bell: The College Years, a series that my friend Derek and I are currently reviewing over on PrimeTime Preppie.

After traveling to Sylvia’s mansion, Jane is at first excited to finally be reunited with her mother. However, it quickly becomes apparent that not everything is as it seems. Sylvia is nervous and evasive, especially when talking about her husband’s suicide. Her boyfriend, Carlo (the wonderful Federico Dordei), gives off a vibe of pure sleaze and Jane is not happy to discover that Carlo and Sylvia’s affair started while Sylvia was still married. Soon, Jane is having sepia-toned nightmares of past violence and she starts to see a mysterious little girl wandering through the gray hallways of the mansion…

As I watched Girl Missing, with its chilly visuals and twisted storyline, I thought to myself, “This movie must be Canadian.” (And, just so there’s no misunderstandings, I totally meant that as a compliment!) However, I then checked with the imdb and discovered that no, this was not a Canadian film. Instead, it was filmed in Minnesota, which might be close to Canada but is still definitely a part of the United States.

But no matter. Whether the film’s snow was Canadian snow or Minnesota snow, director Joel Soisson still made good visual use of the frozen and desolate landscape. He also made good use of Sylvia’s shadow-filled mansion and the entire film had an enjoyably gothic feel to it. In the end, Girl Missing felt like a fun little Young Adult mystery. It was the epitome of an enjoyable Lifetime film.

What Lisa Watched Last Night #144: A Student’s Obsession (directed by Damian Romay)

Posted on November 2, 2015 by Lisa Marie Bowman

On Sunday night, I watched a Lifetime movie called A Student’s Obsession.

Why Was I Watching It?

Well, the obvious answer that it was on Lifetime. But even beyond that, there’s the fact that the title contained the word “obsession.” Anytime a Lifetime film is about an obsession, it usually turns out to be pretty good.

What Was It About?

Stephanie (Louise Lombard) is a science teacher in Florida. During a field trip to the Florida Everglades, Stephanie is kissed by her new student, James (Alex Esola). Stephanie demands that James be transferred to another science class but it turns out that James doesn’t take rejection well. Soon, Stephanie is being stalked but is she being stalked by James or by her creepy colleague, Richard (Richard Haylor)? And, even more importantly, should she be concerned that her daughter, Nicole (Ella Wahlestedt), has a new boyfriend who is named Seth but looks just like James?

What Worked?

The film was enjoyably over-the-top and melodramatic. That, after all, is what we expect from a Lifetime movie about obsession and A Student’s Obsession delivered.

What Did Not Work?

How stupid can one person be before you lose all sympathy for her? That’s the question that you have to consider while watching this film because Stephanie does a lot of very stupid things. Obviously, whenever it comes to a movie like this, you have to be willing to suspend your disbelief but this movie demanded that you do more than just suspend it. In order to take this movie seriously, you had to ignore the whole concept of disbelief. Stephanie did so many stupid things that it was next to impossible to have much sympathy for her.

Myself, I lost all sympathy for Stephanie the minute that she decided to sit in a car and have a conversation with James. This occurred right after Stephanie had been fired because of all the rumors about her and James. And yet, even though Stephanie knew that everyone was saying stuff that could possibly cause her to never work as a teacher again, she still decided to get in a car with James and have a conversation with him. And, of course, the car was parked in the school parking lot so any teacher or student could have easily walked by and seen the two of them.

At that point, I said, “Okay, Stephanie — you’re too dumb for me to care about.”

“Oh my God! Just like me!” Moments

Oh, there was so much I related to in this film and I’m not just talking about the whole experience of having to deal with creepy stalkers. For instance, much like Stephanie, I am a runner. I run whenever I’m stressed out and, when I’m running, I’m usually off in my own little world. That whole scene where Stephanie nearly got run over because she wasn’t paying attention when she ran out in the middle of the road? Done that.

(Of course, the big difference is that I yelled at the car and gave the driver the finger and everything else. Stephanie just kind of ignores the car.)

I also related to Stephanie’s daughter, Nicole. This was largely because Nicole was a rebellious redhead and so am I!

Lessons Learned

I should have gone to high school in Florida. Seriously, the school was huge and the science class got to go on a totally kickass field trip to the Everglades.

What Lisa Watched Last Night #143: Online Abduction (dir by Steven R. Monroe)

Posted on November 2, 2015 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This weekend, as I recovered from our latest Horror Month here at the Lens, I watched the latest Lifetime original film, Online Abduction.

Why Was I Watching It?

So, as our long-time readers can probably imagine, last month was an exhausting time here at the Shattered Lens. Though I don’t have an exact count, I believe that I personally wrote over 150 reviews for October. When Halloween finally arrived I was on the verge of collapse. What better way to decompress than by watching the latest film on Lifetime?

What Was It About?

Isabel (Brooke Butler) is a teenager with issues. Her mother (Natalia Livingston) ignores her. Her stepfather (David Chokachi) is overly critical of her. Her 3 year-old brother gets the all the attention. Feeling unwanted by her family, Isabel spends most of her time online or hanging out with her friends, all of whom spend most of their time online as well.

However, one day, her little brother is abducted. With her parents blaming her and the FBI turning out to be surprisingly inefficient, Isabel takes it upon herself to find out what has happened to her little brother. And, fortunately, she knows how to use the internet to do it…

What Worked?

Most Lifetime movies are basically about unappreciated mothers whose daughters refuse to take their advise until it’s almost too late. The film usually ends with the daughter hugging her mom and admitting that she should have listened to her mother from the beginning. Online Abduction, however, tweaks the formula. This time, it’s the daughter who knows best and the mom who should have listened to her from the beginning.

As well, most Lifetime film present the internet as being an instrument of the devil. So, it was interesting to see a Lifetime film where the internet was not only a good thing but also the key to solving all of the world’s problems. (Online Abduction was pretty much the epitome of a “the internet can do anything!” movie.)

What Did Not Work?

The mystery was a bit pedestrian. I kept waiting for some big twist and it never came. Online Abduction lacked the type of over-the-top, batshit crazy melodrama that a lot of us look forward to when it comes to Lifetime movies.

“Oh my God! Just like me!” Moments

I related to Isabel. It’s not easy being a teenager.

Lessons Learned

The kids are alright and the Internet can solve anything.

What Lisa Watched Last Night #142: Are You My Daughter? (dir by Jason Bourque)

Posted on October 18, 2015 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Last night, I watched the latest Lifetime movie premiere, Are You My Daughter?

Why Was I Watching It?

Because it was on Lifetime, of course! Of course, I was only able to watch the 1st hour before I had to change the channel over to SyFy so I could watch They Found Hell. But, fortunately, Lifetime always shows their movies twice so, once They Found Hell was over with, I was able to turn back to Lifetime and catch the final hour of Are You My Daughter?

What Was It About?

14 years ago, Laura Paddington’s (Brooke Langton) 3 year-0ld daughter disappeared. In the years since, Laura has suffered from a lot of guilt. She’s also seen her marriage to Richard (Mike Dopud) end in divorce.

At first, when Laura meets Jacob (Peter Benson) is a support group, he seems like the perfect guy. Jacob tells Laura that she has to move on from the disappearance of her daughter and, under Jacob’s guidance, Laura finally decides to clean out her daughter’s old bedroom.

However, when Laura attempts to donate her daughter’s clothes to the local shelter, she is shocked when she meets Rebecca (Stephanie Bennett). Rebecca not only looks like a teenage version of her daughter but she also has the same birthmark on the back of her neck! After Rebecca gets a DNA test, it is confirmed that she is Laura’s daughter!

Or is she? When Richard meets her, he is immediately suspicious of both Rebecca and Jacob. Is Richard being paranoid or is Laura the victim of a very cruel con?

What Worked?

There are certain directors who I’m always happy to see listed in the opening credits of a Lifetime or a SyFy movie. Whenever I see that a film was directed by Doug Campbell, Grant Harvey, or Griff Furst, I always know that I’m going to see a movie that’s better than the average Lifetime melodrama. The director of Are You My Daughter, Jason Bourque, is another one of those directors. He’s directed and written his share of films for both Lifetime and SyFy and his films are always very entertaining and well-done. That’s definitely the case with Are You My Daughter, which is a fun and twisty little melodrama. (Bourque also directed a film called Black Fly, which I reviewed on this site a few months ago.)

As well, Stephanie Bennett did a good job as Rebecca/Zoe. She kept you guessing.

What Did Not Work?

It all worked. This was a fun and enjoyable Lifetime movie.

“Oh my God! Just like me!” Moments

I’m not a mother yet but once I am, I am going to be so overprotective. Seriously, my kids are never going to be out of my sight. It’s hard for me to think of anything more terrifying than having your child disappear.

Lessons Learned

Keep an eye on your children.

What Lisa Watched Last Night #141: Reluctant Witness (dir by Monika Mitchell)

Posted on October 17, 2015 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Last night, I finally found the time to sit down and watch Reluctant Witness. Of course, if you know me, you know that I can only sit still for 15 minutes at a time. So, I spent a good deal of the movie standing up and cleaning the living room but, no matter what else I was doing, I still continued to watch the movie.

Why Was I Watching It?

Reluctant Witness actually premiered last Sunday. That was the same day that I got back from my vacation and I was way too busy unpacking and cleaning the house to watch it. So, I set the DVR to record it because you never know when an unexpectedly brilliant movie might suddenly show up on Lifetime. Last night, I finally remembered that Reluctant Witness was on the DVR so I decided to watch it and see if it was another classic, like Confessions of Go Go Girl. (It turned out not to be a classic but it was Canadian and that’s almost as good!)

What Was It About?

Melissa (Mia Kirshner) was married to a Chicago gangster named Jimmy (James Kirk). Jimmy was an abusive psychopath, the type of goes out his way to give the city of Chicago an even worse reputation than it already has. So, Melissa goes to the FBI and offers to testify against Jimmy but only if they agree to help her and her daughter start a new life somewhere else. Of course, the FBI says yes.

So, Jimmy goes to prison. And then, a decade later, he gets paroled and he uses all of his gangster money to have plastic surgery. And the plastic surgery is so amazingly good that he comes out of it looking like a totally different person! (It helps that post-surgery Jimmy is played by a totally different actor named Paul McGillion.) Jimmy fakes his own death and then goes searching for his wife.

Melissa has a totally new life, with new friends and a new boyfriend and a daughter who only sorta resents her. Not only that but she also has a brand new name! Melissa is now named Erin! Everything appears to be perfect until the mysterious Warren shows up. Warren reminds Erin of Jimmy. Is Erin correct or is she just paranoid?

(Of course, we already know that Warren is actually Paul. There wouldn’t be much of a movie otherwise…)

What Worked?

Mia Kirshner kicked ass in the role of Melissa/Erin! I loved the fact that she the same reaction to all of this that I would probably have — which is to say that she was really annoyed and kinda wished that everyone would just go away.

What Did Not Work?

Despite having a somewhat interesting plot, the film just failed to hold my interest. Maybe it’s because I was busy obsessively cleaning the living room but I found my mind wandering through the entire film. It has all the elements for a good Lifetime film but they never quite came together.

“Oh my God! Just like me!” Moments

I have a sister named Melissa and a sister named Erin! Okay, so technically, that’s not really a “just like me” moment but I love my sisters.

Lessons Learned

Chicago is full of gangsters.

What Lisa Watched Last Night #140: Murder in Mexico (dir by Mark Gantt)

Posted on September 27, 2015 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Last night, I watched the latest Lifetime original film, Murder in Mexico!

Why Was I Watching It?

I may be on vacation but that doesn’t mean that I’m not going to watch and live tweet the latest Lifetime film!

What Was It About?

This was one of those based-on-a-true-crime-story Lifetime productions! Bruce Beresford-Redman (Colin Egglesfield) is a successful reality TV producer who has trouble being loyal to his wife (Leonor Varela). When they take a vacation in Cancun, Bruce’s wife is murdered and Bruce quickly becomes the number one suspect.

What Worked?

Colin Egglesfield and Leonor Varela were both well-cast. Also, the scene where Bruce crosses the Mexico-US border reminded me of the border scenes from No Country For Old Men.

What Did Not Work?

Just speaking as somebody who enjoys live tweeting Lifetime films, it’s always hard to know how to deal with these “true crime” movies. The whole point of live tweeting is to be snarky and that can be difficult when you’re talking about real murderers, real victims, and real children who will now grow up without their mom and knowing their dad is in prison. For that reason, Murder in Mexico was not as fun to live tweet as A Deadly Adoption or The Unauthorized Full House Story.

Beyond that, it was hard not to feel that Bruce Beresford-Redman and his crimes were not worthy of the attention that this movie gave to him. The film attempted to make him interesting by playing up his past as a reality tv producer and trying to maintain some ambiguity as to whether or not Bruce was actually guilty but, ultimately, Bruce just came across as your standard cheating asshole. In the end, both his guilt and his motives were too obvious to be intriguing.

“OH MY GOD! Just. Like. Me!” Moments

In 2008, I went to Cancun for Spring Break and it was a blast! Seriously, I had a great time and did a lot of things that I probably shouldn’t post in public. However, none of those things involved murder and I suppose that’s a good thing.

Lessons Learned

Once a cheater, always a cheater.