Late Night Retro Television Review: Friday the 13th: The Series 2.19 “The Butcher”

Posted on November 22, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Friday the 13th: The Series, a show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on YouTube!

This week, it’s all about Jack!

Episode 2.19 “The Butcher”

(Dir by Francis Delia, originally aired on April 24th, 1989)

Horst Mueller (Colin Fox), a Nazi scientist, uses a magic amulet to bring back to life the fearsome Col. Rausch (Nigel Bennett), a Nazi war criminal who was infamous for using barb wire as a garotte whenever he was carrying out executions. Rausch was killed during the war by a squad of soldiers led by a young lieutenant named Jack Marshak. Once Rausch is brought back to life, he not only sets himself up as a radio talk show host but he also seeks revenge on the men who killed him. One-by-one, he kills the members of the squad until eventually, only three are left alive, Simpson (Julius Harris), Shaw (John Gilbert), and Jack.

There were many episodes of Friday the 13th in which Jack was absent and described as being out-of-town while Micki and Ryan dealt with the latest cursed antique. This, however, is the first episode to feature Jack on his own. He mentions that Micki and Ryan are out-of-town, presumably because they’re tracking something down. This leads Jack to face Rausch with only the help of Simpson and Shaw. Watching this episode, one gets the feeling that Jack wouldn’t have it any other way. While this episode features all of the usual blood and melodrama that we’ve come to expect from this show, it also serves as a tribute to the friendship between Jack and his comrades-in-arms. Jack relates to Simpson and Shaw in a way that he can’t relate to the much-younger Micki and Ryan. If Jack is usually cast as a fatherly figure, this episode finds him working with equals and fighting against a monster with whom he has a personal connection. This is the rare episode to not feature any of Lewis’s cursed antiques. Instead, the magic amulet is one of the many artifacts for which Heinrich Himmler and the SS spent much of the war searching.

It’s a change-of-pace episode that gives Chris Wiggins a chance to show off his considerable talents an actor. Rarely has Jack been as haunted as he is in the episode and Wiggins’s sad eyes allow us to see what a lifetime of dealing with unbelievable evil would do to a person. In this episode, Jack is not just aware of the evil in the world but he’s also aware that he and his comrades-in-arms, the members of the so-called “Greatest Generation,” are aging and their time is passing. Jack and his friends are at an age where they should be enjoying their retirement. Instead. they’re still fighting against the legacy of Hitler’s evil.

This was a good and melancholy episode of Friday the 13th. This show could be uneven but episodes like this were good enough to make one mourn that the series did not last longer than just three seasons.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Monsters 2.23 “The Bargain”

Posted on November 20, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing Monsters, which aired in syndication from 1988 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on YouTube.

This week, a woman gets more than she bargained for when she gives it all up for love.

Episode 2.23 “The Bargain”

(Dir by Tom Noonan, originally aired on May 27th, 1990)

Sarah (Kim Greist) is a lonely woman who owns a used bookstore and who is in love with the man who appears to be her only customer, Joe (Kevin Geer). Joe is a TV repairman and he presents himself as being a typical blue collar guy, except for the fact that he’s always buying books of romantic poetry. He claims that they’re for a friend. Sarah recites a French poem for him. “I don’t speak French,” Joe replies.

Sarah feels that she’s too shy and plain to ever catch Joe’s eye. But then, while looking through an old magazine, she comes across an advertisement for a mask that will make all of her dreams come true. On a lark, Sarah calls the number. Soon, a horribly scarred woman named Carmen (Sharon Sharth) comes to the store. Carmen gives Sarah a mask but she says that there’s a price. First off, by putting on the mask, Sarah will be agreeing to give up all of her books to Carmen. Secondly, Sarah must never remove the mask. Sarah agrees.

The mask does make Sarah beautiful. Now going by the name of Mandy, she turns her empty bookstore into a video store. When Joe comes in, Mandy flirts with him but it turns out that Joe is angry about the bookstore going away and also, he was in love with Sarah. Mandy protests that she is Sarah, just for Carmen to show up with Sarah’s old face. Carmen has assumed Sarah’s identity and Joe is now in love with her. Desperate to prove her actual identity, the real Sarah rips off her mask, leaving her face just as disfigured as Carmen’s used to be.

As Sarah cries, Carmen tells her that the only she can ever fix her face is by selling the mask to someone else….

Featuring three strong performances and a storyline that’s a bit more nuanced than usual for this show, this is a pretty good episode of Monsters. Interestingly enough, it was directed by actor Tom Noonan, who has played a number of villains over the course of his career, including the memorable killer from Manhunter, in which he co-starred with Kim Greist. (Kevin Geer actually looks enough like Noonan that, at first, I thought Tom Noonan was pulling double duty as both director and star.) Noonan directs the episode like a particularly fast-paced play, emphasizing character and location over easy shocks. Not only do the characters seem real but so does Sarah’s beloved bookstore. The twist at the end is effective, even if it is a bit predictable.

Next week, we finish up season 2 of Monsters!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Baywatch Nights 2.19 “The Eighth Seal”

Posted on November 19, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Baywatch Nights, a detective show that ran in Syndication from 1995 to 1997. The entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!

This week, Mitch gets possessed!

Episode 2.19 “The Eighth Seal”

(Dir by Jon Cassar, originally aired on April 26th, 1997)

Twice, Mitch saves a young girl named Jenny (Esme Ganz) from jumping off a bridge. When Mitch discovers the Jenny’s adoptive parents don’t seem to care whether she lives or dies, he brings her back to his house and lets her stay the night while he tries to figure out what to do about her.

What Mitch doesn’t know is that Jenny is possessed by a demon named Teddy. When Mitch does discover that Jenny is housing a denizen of the damned, he does the worst possible thing that one can do in that situation. He pulls a Karras and allows the demon to enter him. Now, Mitch is possessed. Can Daimont and Ryan get the demon out of Mitch or will Mitch have to run in front of truck in order to knock Teddy out of him?

Believe it or not, Mitch does the latter. He runs in front of a truck! The truck hits him and sends Mitch falling backwards. Mitch is out cold. While Ryan and Daimont try to revive him, Mitch’s spirit is visited by Stephanie Holden (Alexandra Paul). Though this was Stephanie’s first (and only) appearance on Baywatch Nights, she was a prominent member of the Baywatch ensemble for several seasons. Her character, who was always implied to have feelings for Mitch, was eventually killed off. Stephanie’s spirit appears and yes, she is wearing the red Baywatch swimsuit. And while it’s actually a pretty sweet scene as Stephanie tells Mitch that it’s not his time to die, it’s hard not to smile at the fact that Stephanie is apparently still a lifeguard in the afterlife. It’s like she went to Heaven and said, “Give me the reddest and tightest one-piece that you have.”

Things end happily. Mitch is no longer possessed. Jenny is no longer possessed. Jenny’s adoptive parents are consumed in Hellfire but that’s okay because they sucked. And, for once, the viewer is happy as well because this is actually a pretty good episode of Baywatch Nights. Seriously, you have not lived until you’ve seen David Hasselhoff pretend to be possessed by a demon. Beyond that, though, his reunion with Stephanie was actually pretty poignant, red swimsuit and all. If nothing else, it gave Mitch a chance to say goodbye to Stephanie, which was something he never really got to do in Baywatch.

Speaking of Baywatch, do you think Mitch went to his day job and told all the lifeguards, “Hey, you won’t believe what happened to me this weekend!” Probably not. I don’t know if I’d want to work with someone who had a history of getting possessed by demons. That may just be me, though.

Live Tweet Alert: Watch Bay of Blood With #ScarySocial!

Posted on November 16, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Bay of Blood (1971, dir by Mario Bava, DP: Mario Bava)

As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in a few weekly live tweets on twitter. I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie! Every week, we get together. We watch a movie. We tweet our way through it.

Tonight, for #ScarySocial, I will be hosting Mario Bava’s Bay of Blood!

If you want to join us on Saturday night, just hop onto twitter, start the film at 9 pm et, and use the #ScarySocial hashtag! The film is available on Prime and Tubi! I’ll be there co-hosting and I imagine some other members of the TSL Crew will be there as well. It’s a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy

Late Night Retro Television Review: Friday the 13th: The Series 2.18 “A Friend To The End”

Posted on November 15, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, it’s two stories for the price of one!

Episode 2.18 “A Friend To The End”

(Dir by David Morse, originally aired on April 17th, 1989)

Before I say anything else about this episode, I should make clear that I’ve been watching Friday the 13th on YouTube. Every episode has been uploaded and 99% of the uploads are clean and clear and easy to follow. Unfortunately, this episode was the exception. The sound quality was terrible. The image was often blurry. I’m not sure why this episode — and none of the other uploaded episodes — was so bad but it was bad enough that I occasionally struggled to follow the plot. That’s not the fault of the show. It’s just that the video that was uploaded to YouTube was really bad. While I think I got the gist of the episode, I should still make clear that I watched it under less than ideal conditions.

This episode actually tells two stories. With Jack out of town, Micki and Ryan are trying to retrieve the Shard of Medusa, a crystal that turns people into statues. DeJager (Donna Goodhand) is the artist who currently owns the shard and who is using it to turn her models into stone. What’s interesting about this story is that, when the episode begins, we join in medias res. Micki and Ryan already know that DeJager has the shard and they’re already making a plan for Micki to go undercover as a model.

Unfortunately, they’re so busy trying to get back the shard that they don’t really have time to look after J.B. (Zachary Bennett), Micki’s young nephew who keeps getting left at the antique store while his newly-divorced mother runs off with her latest boyfriend. (Interestingly, Ryan scornfully asks Micki about “your sister,” but since Micki is Ryan’s cousin, wouldn’t Micki’s sister also be his cousin?) While Micki and Ryan are busy trying to get back the shard, J.B. is breaking into a nearby haunted house and befriending a troubled boy named Ricky (Keram Malicki-Sanchez). What J.B. does not know is that Ricky is actually a living dead boy who is kept alive by a cursed coffin. In order to continue to live, Ricky has to sacrifice people to the coffin. Ricky isn’t happy about this. He just wants a friend. J.B. is willing to be that friend but what will happen when Ricky, desperately in need of a new sacrifice, turns his gaze towards Micki?

One of the strange things about this episode is that, when J.B. tells Micki and Ryan about Ricky, they both assume that he’s just making something up. After everything Micki and Ryan have seen, would they really be so skeptical about J.B. claiming to have met a ghost in a long-abandoned house? The other interesting thing about this episode is that the two storylines didn’t really intersect, beyond the fact that J.B. felt neglected because Micki and Ryan were spending so much time trying to get the shard. At one point, DeJager breaks into the store and briefly grabs J.B. but that’s something that probably would have happened regardless of whether or not J.B. had ever met Ricky.

Did this episode work? I’m hesitant to give a final verdict because of the poor quality of the upload. That said, Keram Malicki-Sanchez gave a good performance as the tragic Ricky and I appreciated how all of the stuff with DeJager almost played out like a good-natured parody of a typical Friday the 13th episode. Bad upload and all, this episode worked for me.

Finally, seeing as how I reviewed St. Elsewhere earlier today, I simply have to note that this episode was directed by Dr. Jack Morrison himself, David Morse.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Monsters 2.22 “The Gift”

Posted on November 13, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Abe Vigoda and Brad Greenquist star as two criminals who discover that they have an unexpected visitor in the basement of their cabin.

Episode 2.22 “The Gift”

(Dir by Jeffrey Wolf, originally aired on May 20th, 1990)

Two low-life criminals, Sid (Abe Vigoda) and his protege, Kirby (Brad Greenquist), show up at a cabin in the mountains. They have a rich kid named Jeffrey (Zach Overton) with them. They’ve kidnapped Jeffrey from his exclusive private school and they are planning to hold him until they get paid several million dollars.

Wanting to keep the kid comfortable, Sid tells Kirby to look in the basement for blankets. Kirby doesn’t find any blankets but he does a find a mysterious wolfman. Kirby shoots the wolfman twice but the wolfman survives. Kirby then chains up both Jeffrey and the Wolfman in the basement. Kirby thinks that it might be a good idea to forget about the whole kidnapping scheme but Sid is determined to get the money.

In the basement, Jeffrey discovers that the Wolfman can communicate with him through telepathy. The Wolfman introduces himself as being William (physically played by Carlos Lauchu, with a voice provided by John Michael Bolger). William explains that he’s not a monster. Instead, he’s just a man who, centuries ago, was granted magical abilities by an old traveler. Now, William is over 200 years old. He’s nearly immortal but he’s also lonely. Jeffrey is the first person who has been willing to listen to William in a long time.

Jeffrey and William bonding in the basement is undeniably sweet but Sid and Kirby are still holding Jeffrey hostage and, as time passes, it becomes obvious that they’re planning on killing both Jeffrey and his new friend. William explains that there is a way that he can ensure that Jeffrey will survive and that he’ll be able to defeat both Sid and Kirby. But it will involve Jeffrey making a huge sacrifice of his own….

This episode was fairly dull. When it started, I was hoping that the show would at least do a Ransom of Red Chief sort of thing and have Jeffrey turn out to be such a brat that absolutely no one would be willing to pay a cent to get him back. I think that would have been more interesting than what we ended up with, an episode in which Jeffrey awkwardly bonded with a werewolf who could only communicate through telepathy because moving his mouth probably would have made the actor’s mask look even cheaper than it already did. Abe Vigoda and Brad Greenquist were well-cast as the two criminals. Vigoda, in particular, did a good job of portraying Sid’s outwardly calm but still ruthless demeanor. Otherwise, this was a fairly dull episode that didn’t really do much with its potentially intriguing premise.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Baywatch Nights 2.18 “Symbol of Death”

Posted on November 12, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Baywatch Nights tries to open an X-File.

Episode 2.18 “Symbol of Death”

(Dir by Richard Friedman, originally aired on April 19th, 1997)

After he’s found wandering around the city and babbling incoherently, Daimont Teague is taken to the hospital. Mitch and Ryan are called to come get him but, by the time they show up, Teague has already wandered off. Teague’s doctor hands Ryan a blue rock that Teague wanted her to have. Suddenly, there’s an explosion in the hospital. Mitch falls to the floor, holding his knee. A wild-eyed man wearing a beret (Terry Kiser) grabs Ryan’s purse. Ryan chases after him and beats him up in the parking lot. Ryan is more upset over her purse nearly being stolen than she is over an apparent terrorist bombing at a hospital. And I don’t blame her! I’d kill to protect any of my purses.

The purse thief turns out to be George Wilson. Wilson explains that he’s a writer and an expert on UFOs. He believes that aliens are already on the Earth and that there’s a huge interstellar conspiracy that controls everything that happens on this planet. (Of course, this show has already established that it’s actually the Knights Templar who control everything.) The blue rock contains some sort of alien presence that apparently possessed Teague and is currently causing him to stumble around the city. Wilson and Ryan team up to track down Teague and protect him from the aliens. It doesn’t make any damn sense but let’s just go with it.

Due to Mitch injuring his knee when that bomb went off, the Hoff is barely in this episode. For that matter, neither Griff nor Donna are in this episode, either. I’m going to guess that this was a cost-cutting measure on the part of the producers because, if there’s any episode in which it would have made sense to call in Griff and Donna, it’s this episode. They could have helped in the search for Teague. As it is, it falls to Ryan and Wilson to do most of the searching. Terry Kiser, who is best known for playing the titular Bernie in Weekend at Bernie’s, is always an amusing presence and he seems to be having a ball playing such a paranoid character. That said, it’s hard not to be a little bit amazed at how quickly Ryan is willing to forgive him for trying to steal her purse.

This episode owed a lot to the X-Files, with its aliens and its murky talk of conspiracies. Unfortunately, it lacks all of the atmosphere necessary to really make its conspiracy-fueled plotline compelling. Despite all of the Dutch angles that are used in this episode, this is still basically a sunny and rather corny Baywatch spin-off. Rather than leaving me feeling paranoid, this episode just let me thinking about silly this whole series truly is. Don’t get me wrong, of course. It’s fun. But it’s also definitely very, very silly.

There’s only four more episodes of Baywatch Nights left to review. I’m going to miss this show after I finish.

Live Tweet Alert: Join #ScarySocial for The Thing!

Posted on November 9, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Tonight, at 9 pm et, Deanna Dawn will be hosting #ScarySocial! The movie? John Carpenter’s The Thing!

If you want to join us this Friday, just hop onto twitter, start the movie at 9 pm et, and use the #ScarySocial hashtag! I’ll be there tweeting and I imagine some other members of the TSL Crew will be there as well. It’s a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.

The Thing is available on Prime!

See you there!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Friday the 13th: The Series 2.17 “The Mephisto Ring”

Posted on November 8, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Micki and Ryan search for a cursed World Series ring.

Episode 2.17 “The Mephisto Ring”

(Dir by Bruce Pittman, originally aired on April 10th, 1989)

In 1982, a gambler is shot and killed by an unknown assailant.

Seven years later, that gambler’s son, Donald Wren (Denis Forest), has developed a problem of his own. Despite his mother (Doris Petrie) begging him not to follow in his father’s footsteps, Donald has become a compulsive gambler. Unfortunately, Donald is not particularly talented at picking winners and, as a result, he’s deep in debt with the mob. Donald has dangerous men after him who want to know where their money is. However, when Donald discovers his father’s ring, things start to change for him.

The ring is a 1919 World Series ring and, as you probably already guessed, it’s cursed. All Donald has to do is put the ring on someone else’s finger and, after the ring kills that person, Donald will receive a vision of how a sporting event is going to end. Donald discovers who is going to win a basketball game, a horserace, and a UFC match. As Donald continues to use the ring, he starts to lose his mind. Friday the 13th has always felt like a show that’s actually about drug addiction, with the cursed objects not only killing people but also corrupting the minds of the people who own them. Donald goes from being a wimp to being someone who laughs maniacally while watching gangsters violently die.

With Jack away, it falls to Micki and Ryan to retrieve the ring. Donald’s mother wants him to give up the ring because she saw what it did to his father. But Donald refuses to surrender the ring, even when his use of it eventually leads to evil gangster Anthony Macklin (James Purcell) abducting his mother. Donald is able to convince Macklin to wear the ring. Macklin is promptly killed but, when Donald still refuses to give up the ring, his mother ends up shooting Donald in the head. As she explains to Micki and Ryan, she had to do the same thing to Donald’s father. After putting the ring in the vault, Micki and Ryan agree to keep the mother’s history of murder a secret.

This was an okay episode. The most interesting thing about it was that Micki and Ryan, even while they were searching for the ring, were pretty much bystanders to the drama involving Donald, his mother, and the gangsters. Other than a scene where Micki pretended to be flirt with Donald in order to get him to leave a bar with her, neither Micki and Ryan really did much in this episode. Denis Forest, making his second appearance on Friday the 13th, gave a good performance as Donald and even managed to generate some sympathy for the character. The gangsters felt like they were left over from an episode of T and T. As I said, it was an okay episode but not one that made a huge impression.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Monsters 2.21 “Refugee”

Posted on November 6, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Monsters takes a turn into le Carré territory.

Episode 2.21 “Refugee”

(Dir by Scott Vickrey, originally aired on Mary 13th, 1990)

Paul (Peter White) is an agent of the CIA. He lives in a run-down apartment, hiding himself from the world and apparently wracked with guilt and regret over some of the things that he did for his country. In the style of many a John le Carré protagonist, he served his country and has been left thoroughly disillusioned as a result. His former superior, Oliver (Philip Abbott), comes to Paul with a proposal. There’s a Russian scientist who is looking to defect. She has apparently spent years trying to escape from Russia. If Paul helps her cross the border and stays with her in a safehouse until the CIA can come and get her, Oliver will never ask Paul to do another thing. Paul’s service as a spy will be terminated.

A reluctant Paul agrees and he is indeed able to get Anna Solenska (Judy Geeson) across the border and into a safehouse. However, Paul realizes that two men have followed them and now want to enter the safehouse themselves. Paul assumes that they work for the KGB but actually, they’re agents of Satan! Apparently, Anna agreed to sell her soul in return for Satan helping her to escape Russia. And now, Satan has sent his people to collect….

Seriously, if you’ve ever wondered what it was like to live under a communist regime, just consider that someone was willing to sell their soul to escape! That’s one reason why I’m proud to be an American and to be a capitalist. No matter what problems we may have in this country, no one is selling their soul to escape. No one is summoning Satan and saying, “Hey, help me get to Cuba!” Capitalism for the win!

As for this episode, I liked the idea behind it. I liked the concept of mixing spy melodrama with supernatural horror. Peter White actually gave a pretty good performance as the burned-out spy and I enjoyed the opening conversation between him and his former superior. But once the episode move to the safehouse, the action started to drag. Monsters is only a 21-minute show so there’s no reason why an episode should have had me checking how much running time was left as often as this one did. British actress Judy Geeson did a good enough job playing Anna’s desperation but her Russian accent was bad enough that it actually distracted from the story. Finally, Satan’s agents were never as scary as servants of the devil should be. This show’s saving grace has usually been its monsters but, in this episode, they were just men with red skin and glowing fingertips.

Sad to say, despite an intriguing premise, this episode was just kind of boring.