Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 2.18 “Equinox”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

This week, Peter White returns to the hospital.

Episode 2.18 “Equinox”

(Dir by David Anspaugh, originally aired on March 14th, 1984)

A college student (Thomas Byrd) comes in after taking a hit to the groin during a touch football game.  It turns out that he might have testicular cancer and it falls to Dr. Cavanero to let him know that he will soon be down a ball.

Dr. Chandler is upset when his new girlfriend prefers to hang out with Luther.  Chandler accuses Luther of “shuckin’ and jivin’.”  Chandler’s girlfriend dumps him for being “mean.”  In a well-acted scene, Chandler talks to Morrison about how he’s expected to act one way as a black man and another way as a black doctor.

Fiscus makes the mistake of giving Elliott Axlerod (Stephen Furst) his lucky baseball cap.  Axelrod spills a urine sample on it and then accidentally sets the hat on fire while attempting to dry it.  Axlerod is having a terrible day until a man dressed like Paul Revere brings his horse into the ER for treatment.  It turns out that Axlerod’s father was veterinarian.  Axlerod cures the horse but he still has to get Fiscus a new hat.

Finally, Dr. White returns.  His charges have been reduced from attempted rape to assault.  Wendy Armstrong is not happy and starts to binge eat.  (And yet, as several nurses point out, she doesn’t gain a pound.  We all know what that means….)  When Kathy Martin sees Peter in the cafeteria, she yells that he raped her.  “You’re crazy,” Peter lies.

The episode ends with Dr. Chandler going for a run outside, stopping, and screaming into the air.

This episode was a bit uneven.  The Axlerod story worked because of the likability of Stephen Furst and not because the story itself was particularly clever.  The Philip Chandler/Jack Morrison conversation was the highlight of the episode, though the ending with Chandler screaming into the void was a bit overdone.

As for Dr. White, I’ve reached the point where I can’t even stand to look at him and I feel foolish for having any sympathy for him earlier in the season.  Hopefully, this season will end with Dr. White going to prison for life because I’m not sure how many more episodes I can handle of him wandering around the hospital with that smug look on his face.

Seriously, St. Elsewhere, take care of this guy soon….

The Unnominated #20: The Ninth Configuration (dir by William Peter Blatty)


Though the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences claim that the Oscars honor the best of the year, we all know that there are always worthy films and performances that end up getting overlooked.  Sometimes, it’s because the competition too fierce.  Sometimes, it’s because the film itself was too controversial.  Often, it’s just a case of a film’s quality not being fully recognized until years after its initial released.  This series of reviews takes a look at the films and performances that should have been nominated but were, for whatever reason, overlooked.  These are the Unnominated.

Some films defy easy description and that’s certainly the case with 1980’s The Ninth Configuration.

The film opens with a shot of a castle sitting atop of a fog-shrouded mountain.  A voice over tells us that, in the early 70s, the castle was used by the U.S. government to house military personnel who were suffering from mental illness.  Inside the castle, the patients appear to be left to their own devices.  Lt. Reno (Jason Miller) is trying to teach dog how to perform Shakespeare.  Astronaut Billy Cutshaw (Scott Wilson) is haunted by the thought of being alone in space and refuses to reveal why he, at the last minute, refused to go to the moon.  The men are watched over by weary and somewhat sinister-look guards, who are played by actors like Joe Spinell and Neville Brand.

Colonel Kane (Stacy Keach) shows up as the new commandant of the the castle.  From the first minute that we see Kane, we get the feeling that there might be something off about him.  Though he says that his main concern is to help the patients, the man himself seems to be holding back secrets of his own.  With the help of Colonel Fell (Ed Flanders, giving an excellent performance), Kane gets to know the patients and the guards.  (Despite the objections of the guards, Kane says that his office must always be unlocked and open to anyone who want to see him.)  He takes a special interest in Cutsaw and the two frequently debate the existence of God.  The formerly religious Cutshaw believes the universe is empty and that leaving Earth means being alone.  Kane disagrees and promises that, should he die, he will send proof of the afterlife.  At night, though, Kane is haunted by dreams of a soldier who went on a murderous rampage in Vietnam.

The film start out as a broad comedy, with Keach’s smoldering intensity being matched with things like Jason Miller trying to get the dogs to perform Hamlet.  As things progress, the film becomes a seriously and thoughtful meditation on belief and faith, with characters like Kane, Billy, and Colonel Fell revealing themselves to be quite different from who the viewer originally assumed them to be.  By the time Kane and Cutshaw meet a group of villainous bikers (including Richard Lynch), the film becomes a horror film as we learn what one character is truly capable of doing.  The film then ends with a simple and emotional scene, one that is so well-done that it’ll bring tears to the eyes of those who are willing to stick with the entire movie.

Considering all of the tonal shifts, it’s not surprising that the Hollywood studios didn’t know what to make of The Ninth Configuration.  The film was written and directed by William Peter Blatty, the man who wrote the novel and the script for The Exorcist.  (The Ninth Configuration was itself based on a novel that Blatty wrote before The Exorcist.)  By most reports, the studio execs to whom Blatty pitched the project were hoping for another work of shocking horror.  Instead, what they got was an enigmatic meditation on belief and redemption.  The Ninth Configuration had the same themes as The Exorcist but it dealt with them far differently.  (Because he wrote genre fiction, it’s often overlooked that Blatty was one of the best Catholic writers of his time.)  In the end, Blatty ended up funding and producing the film himself.  That allowed him complete creative control and it also allowed him to make a truly unique and thought-provoking film.

The Ninth Configuration was probably too weird for the Academy.  Though it received some Golden Globe nomination, The Ninth Configuration was ignored by the Oscars.  Admittedly, 1980 was a strong year and it’s hard to really look at the films that were nominated for Best Picture and say, “That one should be dropped.”  Still, one can very much argue that both Blatty’s script and the atmospheric cinematography were unfairly snubbed.  As well, it’s a shame that there was no room for either Stacy Keach or Scott Wilson amongst the acting nominee.  Keach, to date, has never received an Oscar nomination.  Scott Wilson died in 2018, beloved from film lovers but never nominated by the Academy.  Both of them give career-best performances in The Ninth Configuration and it’s a shame that there apparently wasn’t any room to honor either one of them.

The Ninth Configuration is not a film for everyone but, if you have the patience, it’s an unforgettable viewing experience.

Previous Entries In The Unnominated:

  1. Auto Focus 
  2. Star 80
  3. Monty Python and The Holy Grail
  4. Johnny Got His Gun
  5. Saint Jack
  6. Office Space
  7. Play Misty For Me
  8. The Long Riders
  9. Mean Streets
  10. The Long Goodbye
  11. The General
  12. Tombstone
  13. Heat
  14. Kansas City Bomber
  15. Touch of Evil
  16. The Mortal Storm
  17. Honky Tonk Man
  18. Two-Lane Blacktop
  19. The Terminator

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 2.17 “Vanity”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

This week’s episode was available on neither Hulu nor Prime.  I had to watch a really terrible upload that I found on Daily Motion.  Bleh.

Episode 2.17 “Vanity”

(Dir by Mark Tinker, originally aired on March 7th, 1984)

I was relieved to see that this episode featured Kathy Martin returning to the hospital.  I was seriously worried that Peter White had killed her.  With Peter in jail for attacking Wendy Armstrong, Kathy doesn’t tell anyone that Peter raped her.  From the minute we first see her, it’s clear that Kathy is suffering from severe PTSD.  As a character, Kathy Martin was not always treated well by this show.  During the first season, she was often portrayed as being a caricature, the quirky pathologist who liked to have sex in strange places.  This episode finally allowed Kathy to emerge as a fully-developed character and Barbara Whinnery gave a strong performance in the role.

Peter is in jail.  Despite Wendy’s anger, Dr. Morrison regularly visits him.  Morrison says that Peter is obviously sick and needs help but, at the same time, he hasn’t accepted that Peter is also the Ski Mask Rapist.  (Peter wasn’t wearing his mask when he attacked Wendy.)  As for Peter, he continues to feel sorry for himself.

Dr. Craig is upset when he receives a cop of the documentary about him and he discovers that he comes across like an arrogant martinet.  Dr. Craig threatens to sue the director (played, again, by Michael Richards) though one gets the feeling that Craig is mainly angry because he knows the documentary is true.

Nurse Rosenthal gets reconstructive breast surgery.  Joseph, the construction worker who has been having attacks of blindness, is successfully operated on.  Sometimes, things work out well at the hospital.  Not often, but sometimes.

Finally. Mr. Entertainment (Austin Pendleton) returns, singing to patients and upsetting his supervisor.  (Mr. Entertainment now works as a janitor at the hospital.)  To be honest, the majority of this episode was devoted to Mr. Entertainment and it was a bit too much.  Austin Pendleton is a good actor but Mr. Entertainment is such a cartoonish character that I mentally checked out of his story.

This was an odd episode.  There was a lot to work but it was almost all overshadowed by Mr. Entertainment.  Sometimes, you can tell a writer has fallen so in love with a minor character that they’ve forgotten about what the audience is actually interested in.  The episode felt like an example of that.

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 2.16 “After Dark”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

This week, it’s time to name the Doctor of the Year!

Episode 2.16 “After Dark”

(Dir by Eric Laneuville, originally aired on February 29th, 1984)

It’s time for the annual end-of-the-year dinner, during which the Women’s Auxiliary will announce their pick for Doctor of the Year.  Last year, to Dr. Craig’s shock, Westphall won the award.  This year, Dr. Craig is sure that he’s going to win.  Even though Craig says that he doesn’t care about awards, he still has his wife, Ellen (Bonnie Bartlett), write out a speech for him.

The dinner is just as boring as usual.  The majority of the doctors who show up mention that their spouse couldn’t make it because they suddenly came down with the flu.  When it is time to announce the Doctor of the Year, Dr. Craig prepares to accept the award.  However, the award is given — for the second year in a row — to Dr. Westphall!

Seriously?  I mean, what the Heck?  Nothing against Dr. Westphall but what exactly has he done to deserve the award this year?  Dr. Auschlander has continued to see patients while battling cancer.  Dr. Craig performed a heart transplant!  Meanwhile, Dr. Westphall has dealt with the administrative stuff and been kind of grumpy.  I’m totally on Dr. Craig’s side here.  There’s no way Westphall deserved that award for two years running.

Westphall, himself, had to leave the awards dinner early because of an emergency at the hospital.  (More on that below.)  Dr. Craig accepts the award in Westphall’s place and — surprise! — gives a sincere speech about how much he appreciates Dr. Westphall’s leadership.  Good for Dr. Craig!  That said, there’s no way Dr. Westphall deserved the award this year.

Meanwhile, Kathy Martin, who we last saw being raped by Peter White in the morgue, is missing.  Peter wanders through the hospital in a narcotic-induced haze, carrying his ski mask in his pocket.  He nearly attacks Shirley.  He does attack Wendy Armstrong and this time, he doesn’t even put on his ski mask.  Fortunately, Fiscus hears Wendy’s screams and knocks Peter out with a fire extinguisher.  Peter is taken away by the police while Westphall heads to Peter’s home to tell Peter’s wife that her husband is the Ski Mask Rapist.

Victor is thinking of getting divorced.  Bobby, on the other hand, decides to ask Joan to marry him.  And Dr. Morrison continues to get too involved with his patients.  When Joseph (Dan Hedaya), a construction worker dealing with random bouts of blindness, is told that he’ll have to quite job, Morrison calls out a fellow doctor being callous.  Good for Morrison!

The episode, a well-acted one that deftly mixed drama and comedy, ended with some unanswered questions.  Peter’s been arrested.  Is he gone for good?  And where is Kathy Martin?  And seriously, how did Dr. Westphall win that award!?

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 2.15 “Attack”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

This week, the identity of the Ski Mask Rapist is revealed.

Episode 2.15 “Attack”

(Dir by Kevin Hooks, originally aired on February 22nd, 1984)

The Ski Mask Rapist is continuing to attack.  Off-screen, a pharmacist is assaulted while trying to catch her train.  In the hospital, a candy striper gets lost in the cavernous building and is attacked in a storage room.  When Shirley Daniels enters the storage room, she’s startled by a man wearing a pest control outfit.  She sprays him with her mace but is later told that the police do not believe that he was the rapist.  Instead, he was just a man trying to steal drugs.  When Fiscus tries to put together a list of men who will walk the women to their cars, Dr. Cavanero tells him that one of the men on his list could very well be the rapist.

Amongst themselves, the women who work at St. Eligius debate what they would do if they are attacked.  Shirley carries her mace.  Wendy says that she would use her keys as a weapon.  Jacqueline Wade says that women who don’t struggle and just submit have a better chance of surviving.  Dr. Cavanero dumps her insensitive boyfriend after he offers up a half-hearted, insincere apology for trying to force himself on her during the previous episode.  The head of the hospital’s security gives a lecture and makes the women feel like the attacks are somehow their fault.  “There’s no need to get hysterical,” he says.

(Myself, I carry mace.  I’m always scared that I’ll accidentally spray myself in the face with it but still, I carry it.)

Kathy Martin turns down the offer of a rape whistle, saying that carrying it would give her the aura of a victim.  As the episode ends, she’s attacked in the morgue.  She manages to push up the ski mask, revealing the face of …. Peter White.

It’s not really a surprise that Peter turned out to be the rapist.  I suspected it was him last week.  Rape may be classified as a sex crime but ultimately, it’s about power.  The weakest men are rapists and there’s no man on this show who is weaker than Peter White.  Before Peter attacks Kathy, we see him with a prostitute who tells him that it’s okay that he couldn’t get it up.  Peter mentions that it’s his anniversary.  Peter is weak and, looking back at the the moment he first appeared during the first season (begging Dr. Morrison to cover for him), it’s obvious that the series has been building up to the moment that he loses control.

There were other things that happened during this episode.  Geraldine Fitzgerald played a patient who Auschlander dated in his younger days.  (Now, she’s a drug addict.)  Victor and Roberta returned from their honeymoon, Victor with a painful sunburn and Roberta with a host of problems that she accidentally broadcast to the entire hospital while talking to her friend in the front office.  (You have to make sure the PA is turned off before talking about your sex life, folks.)  There was a humorous scene in which Dr. Ridley got into an argument with Roberta’s psychiatrist (Philip Sterling).  Dr. Morrison tried to figure out why his latest patient (Dan Hedaya) was suffering from sudden bouts of blindness.

In the end, though, this was a grim episode and not always an easy one for me to watch.  Honestly, if I had been a nurse or a doctor at that hospital, I would have walked as soon as it became apparent that the Ski Mask Rapist was someone inside the building.  I would have gone home and refused to come back until they caught the guy.

Kathy saw Peter’s face as he attacked her.  I fear what’s waiting for me on next week’s episode.

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 2.14 “Drama Center”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

This week, things get depressing.

Episode 2.14 “Drama Center”

(Dir by David Anspaugh, originally aired on February 15th, 1984)

This week’s episode opens with a disturbing scene in which a woman, trying to get her car to start on a snowy night, is attacked and raped in the parking lot of St. Eligius.  The rapist is wearing a green jacket and a ski mask.

At first, I assumed that the rapist was a random lowlife, someone who would likely never be seen again.  But then Dr. Cavanero’s wealthy boyfriend tried to force himself on her and I was left wondering if maybe he would be revealed as the man in the ski mask.  However, towards the end of the episode, there was scene featuring Dr. Peter White.  Having been banned from working in the ER and from prescribing medicine, White is now working in the morgue and, needless to say, he spends this entire episode bitching about it.  As the episode ends, we see that Peter is holding a capsule in his hand, suggesting that he is once again abusing drugs.  However, I also noticed that Peter was wearing the same green jacket as the man in the ski mask!

This was a good episode, well-written and well-acted.  It was also pretty depressing.  Dr. Westphall brings his severely autistic, noncommunicative son Tommy (Chad Allen) to St. Eligius so that Dr. Ridley can examine him.  Dr. Ridley warns Westphall that Tommy is aggressive and that Westphall might not be able to continue to care for him at home, despite the fact that Westphall’s daughter (Dana Short) is planning on forgoing her dream college to stick around and help.  Westphall ends his day reading Tommy a book (“Your mom bought you this book.”) and breaking down into tears and it made me cry a little too.

Meanwhile, a TV crew followed around Dr. Craig for a documentary.  Needless to say, they got in the way and they got on Craig’s nerves.  The director was played by Michael Richards, who, of course, is best-known for playing Kramer on Seinfeld and then having a racist meltdown when he got heckled at a comedy club.   In an episode that was, emotionally, pretty dark, it was almost a relief to get some scenes of Dr. Craig losing his temper with the documentary crew.  As someone who knows William Daniels best as the kindly Mr. Feeney from countless Boy Meets World reruns, it’s been a real pleasure to Daniels as the prickly and arrogant Dr. Craig.  Dr. Craig wouldn’t have had much use for the Matthews clan and all of their drama.

This was an intense and sad episode.  It was St. Elsewhere at its most emotional.

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 2.13 “In Sickness and In Health”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

This week, Victor gets married!

Episode 2.13 “In Sickness and In Health”

(Dir by Mark Tinker, originally aired on February 8th, 1984)

This week’s episode features three storylines.

The least interesting one features Joan Halloran’s father, Charlie Halloran (William Windom), being admitted to and eventually dying at St. Eligius.  The entire Halloran family comes out to visit Charlie and this is one of the storylines that would have worked better if I had the slightest bit of interest in Joan or her family.  For the most part, though, Joan is a boring character and her wealthy family is not that interesting.  I got the feeling this storyline was mostly included to remind us that Joan is a character on the show.  We really have seen much of her over the past few episodes.

Dr. Chandler trained for the Boston Marathon by running the route in the rain.  A car ran him off the road.  A dog chased him.  An attractive woman flirted with him.  (He is Denzel Washington, after all!)   And he finally reached the finish line and nearly collapsed while imagining everyone cheering for him.

Finally, Ehrlich married Roberta.  The wedding took place at Dr. Craig’s house.  Dogger (Kevin Scannell) was the best man and turned out to be just as crude as you might expect someone named Dogger to be.  Dr. Craig was disgusted by the whole thing.  Roberta got cold feet after her mother confessed to having never loved her father.  However, Dr. Craig’s abrasive mother-in-law (Lurene Tuttle) was there to order Roberta to take a chance and marry the man who she might eventually come to love.  This marriage is so obviously doomed.  I’m predicting Ehrlich will be divorced before the season ends.

This episode really didn’t work.  Dr. Chandler training for the Boston Marathon finally gave Denzel Washington something to do but the storyline excuse was mostly just an excuse to do some Boston location shooting.  The Halloran storyline didn’t work because the Hallorans themselves aren’t that interesting.  And, after all the build-up, the wedding was a bit anti-climatic.

They can’t all be winners.

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 2.12 “Hearing”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

This week, Peter White faces the judgment of the medical board.

Episode 2.12 “Hearing”

(Dir by Charles Braverman, originally aired on February 1st, 1984)

At his disciplinary hearing for giving a controlled substance to an undercover officer, Dr. White lies to protect Shirley Daniels.  Even though Shirley tossed him the keys to the drugs on that night, White says that he took the keys without Shirley noticing.  It’s a rare case of Dr. White actually trying to help someone else.  It gets Shirley off the hook but it leads to Dr. White receiving a two-year suspension from working in an ER or prescribing medicine.  Westphall and Auschlander both agree that Dr. White’s career is probably over but Westphall, who has been White’s biggest supporter since he returned from rehab, says that they’ll find a place for him in the hospital.

The new X-ray tech, Lee Tovan (Robert Daniels), cannot hear.  His supervisor (Raymond Singer) claims that Lee is too difficult to work with.  Westphall pledges to support Lee, no matter how much his supervisor complains.

Victor meets Roberta’s wealthy parents and, to everyone’s shock (especially his), he manages to charm them.  Victor also asks Dr. Craig if he can use his house for the wedding.  Dr. Craig misunderstands and thinks that Victor is asking him to be his best man.  Victor explains that he’s already asked his friend, “Dogger,” to be best man.  Craig rolls his eyes but agrees to let Victor use the house.

Finally, Dr. Auschlander asks Fiscus to help him get some marijuana to help with his chemo side effects.  Fiscus tries and fails to call his old college weed guy and then asks Luther if he knows anyone who deals drugs.  Luther rightly points out that Fiscus is stereotyping him but he still manages to get Auschlander a baggie of joints.  Auschlander gets high.  For a first time smoker, he gets REALLY high!  He also ultimately decides that marijuana is not for him.

This episode was a bit uneven.  I liked the irony of White saving Shirley, just to potentially lose his own career as a result.  (Saying that he stole the keys probably didn’t help his case.)  Victor’s wedding storyline has been kind of dragged out more than it needs to be but it’s still entertaining to watch Dr. Craig get frustrated with him.  Norman Lloyd was adorable playing stoned.  But the storyline about the deaf x-ray tech was sabotaged by some very bad acting and some very heavy-handed writing.  That was a shame.

Next week, Victor Ehrlich gets married!

 

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 2.11 “Blizzard”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

This week, it snows in Boston.

Episode 2.11 “Blizzard”

(Dir by Kevin Hooks, originally aired on January 18th, 1984)

It can’t be easy working in a hospital.

I’m thinking about this today because my aunt is currently dying.  After several years of suffering from Alzheimer’s disease, my aunt is currently in a hospital, unresponsive and scheduled to move into hospice care.  Presbyterian Health was the first hospice we reached out to.  They don’t have any available rooms but they were willing to still admit her and send their nurses to the hospital everyday until a room opened up,  One family would lose a loved one and my aunt would get a room.  However, the hospital says that they need the bed that my aunt is occupying so my aunt is being sent to a different hospice.  This hospice is located off the highway and it’s going to be Hell to get to.  I yelled at the hospital social worker for an hour this morning.  He suggested home hospice as a solution but home hospice is what I agreed to for my Dad last year and the pain from watching him die still lingers.

It’s easy to get angry at the doctors and the nurses and the hospice workers but I try not to.  I’m losing my aunt, a woman who stepped up to look after me after my mom died.  They’re losing one of the hundreds of patients that they deal with on a daily basis.  That social worker upset me but ultimately, he was doing his job.

All of this was pressing on my mind as I watched this week’s episode of St. Elsewhere.  Even though this episode was aired 41 years ago, it still felt relevant today.  A patient — a nice old man named Harrison Jeffries (James McEachin) — died because a teenage girl hacked the hospital’s computer, screwed with the files for fun, and accidentally erased the fact that Harrison was allergic to Demerol.  It was sad but it was also something that still happens today.  People, both good and bad, go into hospitals for minor procedures and concerns and they don’t come out.  Last year, my Dad went to the hospital because he was in a car accident and when I first visited him, he seemed like he was doing fine.  Three months later, he died because the accident aggravated his Parkinson’s.  It sucks and it hurts but that’s the way it is.  Tomorrow, I could forget to pack my inhaler when I leave the house and I could die of an asthma attack.  It’s not nice to think about but it could happen.  That’s why you have to truly live life while you can.  You never know when it might be taken away.

As for the rest of this episode, it dealt with a blizzard.  The roof collapsed on Dr. Cavanero and she ended up with a broken arm.  Dr. Craig tried to drive to the hospital and, after his car stalled, nearly died walking through the snow.  (Vijay was able to warm up Craig’s feet by placing them on his stomach.  Craig was not happy.)  Victor struggled with his love for Roberta.  Dr. Armstrong snapped at people.  Jack Morrison was depressed.  Even with this blizzard, it was really just another day at St. Eligius.

St. Elsewhere is frequently downbeat show but that makes sense.  When you think about, no one ever gets a happy ending.

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 2.10 “A Pig Too Far”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

This week, we learn about something called hacking.

Episode 2.10 “A Pig Too Far”

(Dir by Linda Day, originally aired on January 11th, 1984)

I’ve got a family thing going on today so I’m just going to do a bullet-point review.

  • The bigger, richer hospitals are transporting their indigent patients to St. Eligius.  When one of those patients dies, Joan Holloran and Dr. Cavanero (making one of her infrequent appearances) attempt to find out why.  It turns out that other hospitals view St. Eligius as being a dumping ground.  It’s not ethical or particularly nice but everyone seems to agree that it’s a common practice.
  • Ehrlich wants to ask Roberta (Jean Bruce Scott) to marry him, despite the fact that he’s extremely immature and has no idea how to have a meaningful relationship with anyone.
  • Matthew Brody (David Knell) is a teenage computer nerd who, from his hospital bed, is able to hack into the hospital’s computer system.  You can tell this episode was from the 80s because of a lengthy scene in which Matthew explains what hacking is.  Everyone is stunned that such a thing can be done.
  • Bobby shaves his mustache.  Now he looks like the handsome Mark Harmon we all know!
  • A woman with violent mood swings is brought into the psych ward.  Dr. Ridley diagnoses her as having PMS.  He and Dr. Morrison have a good laugh about it while this reviewer narrows her eyes and considers throwing her laptop out the bedroom window.
  • Shirley and Dr. White are still under investigation.  What’s odd is that Shirley says that she’s currently not allowed in the ER but actually, we saw her working in the ER in the previous episode.  That leads me to suspect that the episodes were aired out of their extended order.
  • EXCEPT — last week’s episode was a Christmas episode.  This week’s episode features a somewhat random scene of Dr. Craig demanding someone take down a Christmas tree because Christmas is over.  So maybe Shirley being in the ER last week was genuine mistake on the part of the writers.

This was a bit of a bland episode, to be honest.  At this point, I assume anyone who shows up in the hospital is guaranteed to eventually die a terrible death.