Horror Film Review: From Hell It Came (dir by Dan Milner)


“And to Hell it can go!” — The Critics

Sometimes, you’ll come across something that simply defies easy description.  It’s something that actually has to be seen to be believed.  I could describe to you the monster at the center of 1957’s From Hell It Came but I don’t know that, even with my extensive vocabulary, I really have the capability to capture just how absurd and weird this thing is.

In this case, a picture says more than a thousand words ever could:

The monster in From Hell it Came is a walking tree that has a rather angry (not to mention immobile) face.  After Prince Kimo is framed for the murder of his father, the chief of a tribe that lives on a South Sea island, he is sentenced to execution.  He announces that he will seek revenge on everyone who framed him.  He’s then stabbed in the heart and encased in the trunk of a hollow tree.  (Apparently, the knife is left in his heart which seems kind of unnecessary but who am I to argue?)  Later, Kimo comes back as a walking tree who tosses his enemies into quicksand.  The knife is still sticking out of the tree, which would suggest that Kimo was physically transformed.  However, the native insist that Kimo has actually become one of their legendary monsters, the fearsome Tabanga.

Along with the natives, there is also a group of American doctors on the island.  They’ve been sent to conduct research and to also give the natives medicine to help them deal with an outbreak of the plague.  The natives don’t trust the medicine.  They trust the magic of their medicine men.  Since this film came out in 1957, the doctors react to this by rolling their eyes and talking down to everyone.  If there’s one thing that has remained consistent over the decades, it’s that the worst way to get people to do anything is to talk down to them.

The doctors are the first to discover the tree stump that will eventually become the Tobanga.  They take the stump back to their laboratory, where they discover that the stump is radioactive due to some nearby atomic tests.  The next day, the stump comes to life and leaves the laboratory.  One of the most interesting things about this film is that the scientists are skeptical about the natives claim that the tree stump is one of their legendary monsters come to life but they are willing to accept that radiation created a walking stump.  Radiation bringing a tree stump to walking life actually makes even less sense than magic doing it.

While the tree is killing its enemies, the American doctors deal with their own drama.  For instance, Dr. Terry Mason (Tina Carver), is a woman and that greatly disturbs her male colleagues, all of whom  can’t understand why she’s not currently married and raising a family.  Meanwhile, Mrs. Mae Kilgore (Linda Watkins, an American actress who played the role with an amazingly bad British accent) owns the local trading post and is not happy about having a killer tree wandering around the island.  Mrs. Kilgore is prone to saying things like, “I saw the bloomin’ thing!”

In the end, the Americans finally figure out how to deal with the murderous tree.  “Your American magic is better,” the current chief of the natives says.  “Hell yeah!” I shout in response, “AMERICA!”  From Hell It Came is a thoroughly ludicrous movie but, once you watch it, you’ll never forget that tree.

 

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 4.11 “That’s My Dad/Captive Audience/The Captain’s Bird”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986!  The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

Merry Christmas!

Episode 4.11 “That’s My Dad/Captive Audience/The Captain’s Bird”

(Dir by Allen Baron, originally aired on December 20th, 1980)

It’s time for the Love Boat’s annual Christmas cruise and, appropriately enough, this cruise is all about family.

For instance, Captain Stubing has decided that the perfect Christmas gift for Vicki would be a parrot.  After the bird is brought on board, Stubing decides that the perfect place to hide it would be in Gopher’s cabin.  Gopher goes along with this because it’s something of a miracle that he hasn’t been fired yet.  I mean, when you’ve screwed up as much as Gopher has, you’re not really in a position to argue with your boss.  The only problem with all of this is that the parrot won’t talk.  Stubing isn’t happy about that so Isaac and Gopher try to teach the bird to sing a Christmas carol.  Instead, the bird starts saying, “Captain Stubing is a jerk!”  Uh-oh!

Meanwhile, singer Bobby Braddock (Jack Jones, who sang The Love Boat theme song) boards the ship with his wife, Susan (Laraine Stephens).  What Bobby doesn’t know is that his father, Richard (Allan Jones), and his mother, Lil (Dorothy Lamour), are also on the ship.  Bobby got his start as a part of Richard’s act and Richard has never forgiven Bobby for going solo.  Julie, Lil, and Susan all hope that they can bring father and son back together again.  Needless to say, Richard doesn’t appreciate being tricked into boarding a boat with his son.  He grimaces while listening to Bobby sing Winter Wonderland and then storms out of the lounge when Julie asks him to join his son on stage.  Merry Christmas, I guess!

Still, as bad as Bobby Braddock has it, it’s nothing compared to what’s going on with young Scotty (Meeno Peluce).  Looking to escape an abusive life at home, Scotty sneaks on board the ship by telling the crew that another passenger, Jeff Dalton (Dirk Benedict), is his father.  Scotty then proceeds to follow Jeff around the boat.  Jeff has no idea that everyone thinks that he is Scotty’s father.  When Jeff meets a woman and politely tells Scotty to scram, the crew is scandalized.  When Stubing sees the bruises on Scotty’s back, he assumes that Jeff is responsible.

Well, don’t worry.  Things may look bleak at the halfway mark but everything works out in the end.  Jeff realizes that maybe he would like to be a father to a random runaway.  Richard realizes that he can forgive his son for wanting to make his own way.  Crew members dress up like Santa Claus and Vicki has a happy holiday on the ocean.

You know what?  This was a silly episode but I enjoyed it.  I’m a sucker for Christmas episodes and this one had enough comedy and drama to keep me entertained and the story involving Scotty and Jeff even touched my heart a little.  This was definitely a cruise worth taking.