Category Archives: short film

No Title (how cute), AI short film review by Case Wright

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Ok, no title, but in the description it is In The Mountains of Madness. We are going to see some Cthulhu? Some revelations? Some Necronomicon? I’m not hopeful, but I’m also usually right.
Is it a trailer?

There is a British Person telling us about the expedition to Antarctica. They uncover the structures of the Old Ones. The crew finds a laboratory of weird creatures and then they become one with the gross things. As a trailer, it would’ve been excellent. The imagery is quite good and it does capture what these creatures might look like and how they possess the expedition crew.

Is it a short? There is a beginning a middle, but there is not really a clear ending. It could just be that I’m so used to seeing the absolute worst garbage AI films that I’m unable to tell what is good or bad anymore because nothing matters. However, I think this short might be – ok. Not great, but it is ok and I suppose that you could do worse things with 90 seconds of your life.

I Heard It Too, AI Short Film Review by Case Wright

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I’m not surprised that there are AI short films, but why so many? Every hack with a computer and no imagination just decided to make something awful. They don’t get a lot of views and the creator knows he or she made this steaming pile of bleh.

We open to 1970s America and some really bad big band jazz (shouldn’t it be The Allman Brothers?!). We are inside a suburban home. The mom is cooking and the daughter goes to look for her mom, but there’s some sort of fart demon sound. Again, I have no idea what actually happened in this story. This is a theme with AI shorts- they are terrible and stupid. I need to find something better to watch. Life is short and I am a fairly good person.

Trepidation, AI Short Film Review by Case Wright

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Wow, only 6 days left! I can’t believe it, until I need to review another horrible AI short. Why am I reviewing these universally terrible films? It’s the new thing and someone needed to catalog the beginning. Of course, it had to be me; yes, I am martyring myself, but come on… you don’t want to have to watching this waste of a perfectly good two minutes of your life.

Here we go…there’s a lot of hotties with cleavage in a museum and a number of priests. I’m not sure what’s going on, but there is cleavage; so, you can ignore the terrible film that way. A strange cleavage-showing lady asks odd museum goers to look at a painting and imagine God. I would say, “Lady, I already paid to get in here can you just get out of the way of the exhibits?! Do you even work here?! Where did you get that desk/podium?! Security!!! Security!!!” Sadly, no one made this choice to call security and the film continued.

It turns out it’s a Spirit Halloween skull face that giggles, even though it does not have an obvious respiratory system. This was really dumb. I wonder if when AI gets smart, it will tell these “creators” – “you’re really bad at this….just stop and do something else.”

Evil Cassette Tape, AI Short Film Review by Case Wright

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I know camel spiders are gross, but there wasn’t a title card made for this short; so, I decided to add something scary for them. This short is only 1 minute- YAY.

A woman listens to a tape that ask them to thing about death. The voice has her do some light neck stretches and wham she sees a ghost. I suppose that this is scary.

There is a beginning, middle, and an end. Also, it is just a minute long. Is it better than the Progressive don’t turn into your parents ads? NO! However, it is better than…well…I had a crown put on recently; so, better than that FOR SURE!

Mother, AI Short Film Review by Case Wright

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I suppose this is becoming the October of AI. I wanted see if there was ANYTHING good being churned out. They are quite terrible usually. I think it’s fair to say that they are all bad, but some flirt with a D+.
Mother is haunted house story. A pregnant mother decides to go exploring in her own home …. for some reason. It did not look like she just moved in; so, exploring your home is kinda nuts. So, she explores and hears children giggling and goes into a room that looks like a grenade exploded in it. She decides to touch a wall, which opens to a sewer tunnel and decides to go spelunking… as you do.

She’s going through the home sewer and find a ghost child and evil spirit. There was no reason at all for her to do the things she did. I supposed we assume she drunk on stupid juice and turned into a ghost hunter.

What positive things can I write? It was a film. It had a beginning, middle, and an end. There were scenes and the color yellow, which is maybe not positive, but I’m really trying. Also, the sewer was pretty clean, if you’re into that- this is the film for you!

Gelien, Short Film Review, by Case Wright

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Yes, this is their online poster. Yes, there is no title. Yes, the robot apocalypse will be boring.
I don’t know what jobs AI is going to take away, but it will definitely bore us more quickly. Do we really need to make the Alex Magana’s of the world make more film gonorrhea? What would the penicillin be for an Alex Magana film?

However, Alex Magana did not make this steaming pile of jelly garbage, it was Dark Dabs Horror. The world gets attacked by an extraterrestrial jellyfish that covers the earth in goo and kills everything. Why? Who knows? Is it gross? Not really. Nobody dissolves; instead, they all look like they took a swim in jell-o. I wouldn’t call it horror as much as I would call it unintentionally kinda fun in a very sad way. The future is boring.

Zombie Patrol, Short Film Review by Case Wright

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Can AI be used to make an entertaining horror short?
We have a parking garage security guard searching the property because he hears a noise. He finds his coworker slain. A zombie starts rewiring the fuse box and turns off the lights in the garage. The zombie is smart
He encounters the zombie and starts shooting and shooting, killing more and more zombies to heavy metal and that is the whole film.
I enjoyed it. So, AI can make a fun horror short and actors will become a thing of the past.
If you have 2.6 minutes to spare, check it out.

The Killer, Short Film Review by Case Wright

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Once again, I have been thwarted from putting a title card from IMDB in my post. In this case, I think they are kind of shy. I was not even able to provide a link.
It’s called The Killer and it was created by OTP_tv.

The premise is what if a killer really needs to go to the bathroom after the murder? Funny things happen – that’s what! I would almost describe this short as pure comedy, until the end. I was the first person to watch the short because it dropped today and I coincidentally was around at the time. The short is simple and does not try to be too many things, but it does achieve humor and that’s a good thing.

The short begins with a couple bantering about wine and poo….as you do. Then, it appears the wife is bothered by the joke. The husband is stabbed in the bathroom and hilarity ensues. This is a fun short and does not take itself too seriously. If you have 3 or 4 minutes to spare, let it be The Killer.

I reached out to the creators on YouTube and if they get back to me, I will update the review with additional details.

Unidentified, Short Film Review by Case Wright

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I was unable to find anything on IMDB for this film; so, I used this photo from a previous review where it looked like they were going for a Santa Pedo vibe. Read that review below:

https://unobtainium13.com/2021/10/23/creepshow-time-out-the-things-in-oakwoods-past/: Unidentified, Short Film Review by Case Wright

Unidentified is about an ordinary guy who sees an alien invasion. This concept is so overdone that it is really its own subgenre of suckiness. Some random schmoe sees aliens and is unable to do anything about it accept die?! Mr. Filmmaker of Unidentified, why you are bothering me this garbage? Who cares?!

Hear me, it’s one thing if the ordinary person is heroic or we are setting up the story or he causes a resolution, but when it’s just some doofus driving around for 60% of the short, you are wasting my time! Mr. Filmmaker of Unidentified, I understand that creating a story is hard like how you must be always confused when you try to get the mail or turn on your phone, but that doesn’t mean you should pursue the art of film. Instead of making these terrible shorts that lack even a basic story let alone an ending, how about working on a simplistic craft? I’ll even consider putting it on my fridge! Really, my fridge has some prime real estate on it: magnets, shopping list sticky notes, and stains if it’s my housecleaning day.

If this terrible film did pique your interest…..somehow, the story is a British man in a sedan who drives for several minutes and sees a big monster- yep, that’s it. UGHHH. Maybe Alex Magana has a British cousin?

FLU, Short Film Review by Case Wright

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This film was not in IMDB. I could not find the actresses or director on imdb. Unless it’s just a series of slurs, I’m going to pretty lenient and hopeful. The filmmaker has no subscribers and is doing this for the love of the art. My fingers are crossed!
A single mom and her friend are unlucky in love and have a budding romance. During their mundane conversation, the mother’s daughter is screaming like a demon. There are a number of signs of evil presence. Since there was not a conclusion, I believe that this short was a pitch for funding for a feature length film. When Hulu makes a faux short film, it’s very annoying, but Stacey Ellis is trying hard to get her art off of the ground and I wish her the best. Yes, I’ve gone soft.