My Favorite Thing Is Monsters, Book Review by Case Wright

Posted on October 8, 2019 by casewright

Happy Horrorthon! Have you ever read something so dark you felt unclean? My Favorite Thing is Monsters gave me that feeling. The reason I felt unclean is because the situations appeared to be based upon real events in Chicago in 1968 and earlier in Europe. Apparently, everyone in Uptown Chicago in the 1960s and in Germany from the 1920s-1940s was just a terrible person who preyed upon the weak, put their own needs first, and made foolish decisions.

Am I being harsh? No….No, I’m not. When a person can question you, “Didn’t the child being sold into prostitution plot sicken you?” and you have to respond, “Which time?” you wonder why this was written at all? Was Emil Ferris’ having an iced tea one summer and thought, “Hmmmm the world seems like it’s missing something….I got it! … the world is missing a murder mystery that revolves around terrible people who actually deserve to be dead.” By the last few pages, I was rooting for Chicago to be hit be a meteor- it’s the only way to be sure. I know … I know… but Case, so many people liked this book… how dare you buck the literary zeitgeist?! I write… tough! This book is beautifully illustrated, but straight up gross and a pain to read.

The central focus of the story is solving the murder of Anka who has a mysterious and dark past … and when I write Dark Past… I mean the absolutely worst life ever. Anka is the ONLY Holocaust survivor who is not sympathetic! Why?! Because in order to escape the Holocaust, she made a deal with a Nazi pederast to take 6 young children from the camp and force them into child prostitution and be raped by Anka’s Nazi pederast benefactor and other Nazis for the rest of their lives. Yes, that happened! This book was recommended by a parent whose daughter was friends with my daughter and she “loved it, it’s my favorite book”… ok, I’m never speaking with her again!

The plot begins with Anka’s body found in her apartment, shot in the chest, and with no forced entry. Karen Reyes, the ten-year-old main character, does not believe the police’s determination that it was a suicide. Therefore, Karen dons a trench coat and detective hat and gets on the case. By gets on the case, I mean Karen goes on a meandering journey of self-discovery and repeatedly ignores the two most obvious suspects: Anka’s jealous husband and her brother who is a part-time tattoo artist, murderer, who bedded Anka who was married (I should note: the brother bedded Anka while she was alive because this book would go there if it could and probably will in the sequel), and quasi-philosopher.

The book does have a redeeming feature: the art is beautiful, which is maybe a symbolic statement about the world itself; the world is beautiful, but the monsters (people) are the ones who make it ugly.

Karen sees the entire world through art and monsters and draws herself as a short werewolf in the story. She finds out more information about Anka – She was born in Germany shortly after WWI. Her mother sold her into child prostitution twice and Anka garnered a pederast benefactor Schultz who is described above.

Germany is described much like Chicago, an evil place filled with predators, who seek to dominate and murder for their lusts. My big complaint is that this behavior is never really judged harshly by the author; it’s matter of fact and without contempt.

Back in Chicago, her brother Deez would use his tattoos as a form of ownership over his female conquests. The most relevant conquest was Anka, who was extremely mentally ill by the time she moved to Chicago, but that didn’t stop Deez. He also liked to tattoo her back after he would take advantage of her sexually. It was beyond disturbing. Later, in the story, their mother gets cancer and needs medical care. Deez gets drafted, but doesn’t go. You’d think he would accept the draft because it would give his family greater stability, nope; instead, Deez continues down the road of hedonism and violence. Then, I truly despise him.

The characters who are decent human beings are subjected to constant degradation, humiliation, and physical violence. The best thing about this book was that it ended. You don’t even find out who killed Anka for sure at the end of the book because apparently there is a hunger for a sequel for this. Maybe we should keep track of the fans of the people who enjoyed this book- light monitoring only. Who am I kidding?! ROUND THE CLOCK SURVEILLANCE!

Constantine, Review by Case Wright

Posted on October 7, 2019 by casewright

Can one act stain your soul for all eternity? It turns out that if you attempt suicide, you’re going to Hell. Anywho, Constantine was a comic by Alan Moore (Watchmen) long before Keanu Reeves played the demon fighter. Full disclosure, I have purchased, but not read the comic. It’s long and I’m not sure if I can get through it for this horrorthon, but I WILL TRY!

Constantine was born with a “gift” that he could see demons among us. This drives him out of his mind; so, he commits suicide and is sent promptly to Hell. He’s tormented for what seems like an eternity, but in our time was just two minutes. He returns to Earth because paramedics revive him. Because he attempted to kill himself, he’s condemned to Hell when he dies. How do I know this?The “Half-Angel” Gabriel tells it to us in really clunky exposition. It turns out that Heaven and Hell are basically in a Cold War and can’t directly fight on Earth.

Constantine REALLY doesn’t want to go back to Hell. His solution is to fight demons for a living to get into heaven. He does an exorcism here and there and fights evil, but this isn’t his ticket back to heaven- as I was told by MORE exposition. Constantine is kind of a depressive and a little whiny at times. I guess that’s why I kept getting annoyed by him. Yeah, Yeah, your life sucks, but there’s no reason to do this all the time:

There’s a lot of these “I’m so broody Boohoo” moments in this film.

Like this one: broody 3.jpg

This one was a long trip to bummer time with a soupçon of anger:

broody 2.jpg

Between the complaining, Constantine uncovers a plot that Lucifer’s son Mammon is trying to break into earth and cause a lot of trouble. Trouble….Trouble….that starts with M …. and ends with N, which stands for Mammon!

Constantine was entertaining, but it seems kinda all over the place at times. The parts that had him hot on the trail of Mammon and his evil plans were fun, but all the side plots and side characters were a mixture of goofy and dull. Overall, it was a good burgers and fries flick. Not to say that the comics or the cartoon (yep, there’s a cartoon, I know because of Google) aren’t awesome, but if they are the same quality as the movie, they are beach reads or I’m stuck on public transportation reading. There might be sequel. Will I watch it? Yes, because despite my snark, I’m basically 14.

Paperback Review: The Vampire Curse by Daoma Winston

Posted on October 5, 2019 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Yesterday, Erin shared the cover. Today, I’m reviewing the book! That’s what teamwork is all about!

This 1971 novel is all about an 18 year-old named Teena Halliday. Needless to say, anyone with a name like Teena Halliday is going to be young, beautiful, and innocent. Teena was perfectly happy living in a Mediterranean villa with her mom but then her mom had to go off and get remarried. With her mom heading off to South America on a whirlwind honeymoon, Teena is being sent to Massachusetts, where she’ll stay with the Rentlows, some distant relatives that she has yet to actually meet. Teena is hoping that, once she’s in Boston, she’ll get the chance to spend some time with her father. However, when Teena arrives, her father is nowhere to be seen.

Instead, Teena is met by the mysterious but handsome Rory, who takes her to Rentlow Retreat. Teena meets the Rentlows and discovers that they’re a bit more eccentric than she was expecting. Neither Uncle Charlie nor Aunt June seem to be happy to see her and Teena’s cousin Estrella obviously views Teena as being competition for Rory’s attention. In fact, the only person who seems to be the least bit welcoming is Jeremy Rentlow.

Jeremy is a world-renowned sculptor, despite the fact that everyone and everything that poses for him seems to end up dead. The family seems to always be nervous around Jeremy. Could it have something to do with those rumors that Jeremy might be a vampire? Teena isn’t quite sure what to make of Jeremy, especially when he starts to tell her that she’s the most beautiful woman that he’s ever seen and that she simply must pose for him. Teena is hesitant but what else is she going to do? I mean, she has to do something to pass the time, especially considering that her dog Scuffy dies of a mysterious “wasting” disease shortly after Teena arrives at Rentlow Retreat.

Of course, soon, Teena is not only starting to feel a bit anemic herself but Jeremy suddenly announces that they’re going to be married and Teena is not to leave the estate! Is Jeremy a vampire or is he a human with serious and dangerous control issues? Is Teena being drained of blood or is she feeling weak because of the stress of the situation in which she’s found herself? You can probably guess the answer to both of those questions.

Just like Air Force One Is Haunted, The Vampire Curse is one of the books that I found while searching through my aunt’s old paperback collection. It was a fun and (at 196 pages) quick read. It’s very much a gothic romance first and a vampire story second but there’s an undeniable charm to the efficiency with which author Daoma Winston told the story. Everything you could want from a gothic romance is here: breathless, first person storytelling, an old house, an eccentric family, a dark secret, passionate kisses and, of course, a hedge maze. There’s always a hedge maze.

The Vampire Curse was an enjoyable read. I’m a bit stunned that Lifetime has never adapted the book into a film. If they can turn everything credited to V.C. Andrews into a “film event,” surely they can find some time for The Vampire Curse.

Horror Book Review: The Lovecraft Lexicon by Anthony Pearsall

Posted on October 3, 2019 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Are you planning on searching for Cthulhu this October?

If you are, you might want to think again. Seriously, Cthulhu does not like being woken up. The majority of people who have gotten on Cthulhu’s bad side are dead and the one who survived have gone insane. Add to that, it’s not always easy to track down Cthulhu. I mean, sometimes it can be difficult to tell one lost city from another. I guess you could try to track down your local Cthulhu cult or maybe you could summon Nyarlathotep and ask him for directions. If I remember correct, I think that’s what Randolph Carter used to do.

If, despite all the warnings, you’re really determined to track down Cthulhu this summer, you need to order yourself a copy of Anthony Pearsall’s The Lovecraft Lexicon. First published in 2005, The Lovecraft Lexicon contains all the information that you could possibly want about all of the persons, places, and things in the tales of H.P. Lovecraft.

It’s set up like an encyclopedia, with entries on …. well, everything. You want to know about Charles Dexter Ward? He’s in here. Curious about Azathoth? This book has all the information that you need to find. Pearsall details the adventures of Randolph Carter and also sorts through the many legends about the Necronomicon. This book is the next best thing to taking a course at Miskontic University.

However, the Lovecraft Lexicon is more than just an encyclopedia. It’s also a reader’s guide, one that examines just what may have been going through Lovecraft’s mind when he wrote about some of his most infamous creations. The book not only takes a look at Lovecraft’s work but also at the man himself and, to its credit, it’s honest about both Lovecraft’s flaws as a person and his strengths as a writer. In the end, the book celebrates Lovecraft’s imagination and his influence on future writers. Whether you’re a reader who is just now starting in on the works of H.P. Lovecraft or a writer looking to continue to tales of Cthulhu, The Lovecraft Lexicon is an invaluable resource.

Joker, Book Review, By Case Wright

Posted on October 3, 2019 by casewright

Happy Horrorthon! 2008 – Barack Obama was becoming a household name, I still had some hair, and Heath Ledger’s Joker brought the absolute evil of clowns to the silver screen. I understand that some of you might think that the comic Joker is not a horror comic, but guys it’s got a clown right there on the cover; they are ALL trying to kill you. IT COUNTS!

Brian Azzarello and Lee Bermejo sought to bring Ledger’s Joker into a comic form and dig a little deeper into the psychology of Joker and why someone would follow him. The story is narrated by Jonny Frost – a small time gangster- who wanted to be big. Jonny figures that he himself is not larger than life, but by being near bright evil, he too could shine like the moon does with the earth. He picks the Joker.

Christopher Nolan described the Joker as an absolute. He is an id of Corruption and destruction. In this story, the Joker has gotten out of Arkham….again. SIDE NOTE: what’s with Gotham?! They must have the single party liberal governing that we have in Seattle because you’d think they’d have a Three Strikes Rule or the Death Penalty by now. I mean, why let the Joker continue to keep breathing? I get how Batman has this weird code- he wears rubber, cape, lives in a cave, and is all kinds of weirdo, but why do the rest of Gotham’s citizens have it? Do they not vote? Do they have only one ballot choice? So, the Joker meets Jonny Frost the second that he leaves Arkham and Jonny works as a toady and hanger on for the majority of the book.

Jonny narrates the Joker’s return to power as he reaps through the underworld, but he burns most of his possessions down and kills all of his own henchmen and even shoots Jonny at the end. Really, the story depicted the Joker as a force of Anti-Creation. While it was a deeper dive into this Super Villain, it left me wanting because it was told through the lens of this mediocrity Jonny Frost. It says Joker right there on the cover so you’d think it would be all about the Clown Prince of Crime, but instead it was this tangential view of him. I would’ve been more captivated by a story just about the Joker without a go-between.

The story was strong and depicting LOTS AND LOTS of gore. In fact, the Joker kills more people than the Spanish Flu. He’s Lucifer and Death combined to cause havoc. In the end, we get the obvious conclusion that he’s just this disease of evil and that Batman is really just a treatment, but not a cure. It seems that Gotham’s real disease is a soft on crime public policy.

N. By Stephen King; Review By Case Wright

Posted on October 2, 2019 by casewright

kingsnhere

What if you’re not crazy? What if you’re finally seeing the truth that everyone else is too afraid to see? Is the revelation too much for your mind? Could your mind be both the doorway to hell and the gate keeping the evil old ones at bay? Most importantly, can a person’s mental illness infect another person? Stephen King’s “N” is a hybrid of Lovecraft and Modern Psychology where we are forced to learn the answers to these questions.

The story was both a novella and adapted as a comic book/olde-timey radio-show. Confused? Let me explain. N was first published as a novella, but instead of getting made into a comic book or as is typical of King’s work- a movie or miniseries, it became something else. Marc Guggenheim adapted the work as an all dialogue webseries similar to the serials of the 1930s and 40s and presented the story as a series of hyper-detailed comic illustrations. You can see it in its entirety below.

I have also read the novella several times. Honestly, sometimes I’m not sure why I like a particular Stephen King story more than another, but it seems to be when the characters are so real that they could be you or your neighbor. Yes, the monsters are spooky, but it’s the people, their story, their lives, who just happen to have to also deal with a monster or four.

The story begins with Sheila Bonsaint who is in mourning from her brother’s suicide. She is calling her friend who is reminiscent of Anderson Cooper to look into why her brother John killed himself. She believes it’s because of his contact with a patient named N. The story shifts to John’s perspective describing a patient N who suffers from extreme OCD. N believes his OCD rituals keep the portals between our world and the hell world closed.

N describes how he encountered a field with rocks similar to Stonehenge in Maine and that by viewing the structure, he caused the structure to activate and potentially release an ancient evil that will consume mankind. He begins to do OCD rituals to keep the portal closed, but realizes that he must sacrifice his life in order to shut the gate forever. Unfortunately, John becomes infected by N’s mental disorder and becomes overcome with the need to investigate the structure, which activates it again and causes him to spiral into the same OCD as N.

This story struck a very strong chord with me. Last year, I began to take a long road into facing my own PTSD experiences in the Army. When I would tell the medical professionals in the VA about what happened, one cried. My stories had infected them and left them different afterwards. The world was less clean, less safe, and much darker. Now, like N, if I have to tell a person the stories, I begin by saying that I am sorry because what I will tell you, will change you. I suppose that is what humanity does; we share our burdens and our curses. Maybe that’s how we keep the gate to hell closed?

Book Review: Air Force One Is Haunted By Robert J. Serling

Posted on October 2, 2019 by Lisa Marie Bowman

OH MY GOD, AIR FORCE ONE IS HAUNTED!

A few weeks ago, I was going through my aunt’s collection of old paperback novels, searching for anything that I could possibly review during October. While I found a good deal of promising books, I have to admit that I almost squealed for joy when I came across Air Force One Is Haunted.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I had never heard of the book before and I knew absolutely nothing about the plot. But I saw that title and I knew I just had to read it. I mean, seriously — Air Force One Is Haunted! That’s like the greatest title ever! I looked at that title and I asked myself, “What’s haunting Air Force One? Angry druids? Zombies? Succubi? Woodrow Wilson?” Either way, it sounded like it had the potential to be terrifying!

Then I got home and I read the book and I discovered that …. well, let’s just say that my imagination got ahead of me.

Air Force Is Haunted was originally published in 1985 and the author was not only a world-renowned aviation expert but he was also the brother of Twilight Zone-creator Rod Serling. So, it’s perhaps not surprising that Air Force One Is Haunted feels like an extended episode of The Twilight Zone. It’s one of those things where a good but conflicted person has the chance to do something that seems like it might be good for him but it will also be bad for the world at large. Fortunately, a ghost shows up and gives him a lot of advice.

The conflicted person, in this case, is President Jeremy Haines. Haines is in his second term and it seems like the entire world is falling apart around him. America’s in the middle of a great depression. Russia and China are teaming up to possibly try to take over the world. President Haines could always launch a first strike, which would wipe out Russia as a world power but which would also kill a lot of innocent civilians. He can’t make up his mind what to do and, as a result, people across the world are starting to view him as being weak. The President has even started to see a psychiatrist but they’re soon too busy having tasteful, mass market paperback-style sex to actually do anything about the President’s issues.

If only there was a mediocre ex-president that Haines could talk to and get some advice from! However, it appears that even Jimmy Carter is refusing to take his calls.

That’s when FDR shows up.

That’s right. It turns out that FDR is haunting Air Force One and, whenever President Haines boards the plane, he ends up getting advice from him. FDR has a lot of stories to tell about governing during an economic depression. He also says “Bully,” a lot, even though that was Teddy’s phrase.

Anyway, I think the book would have been a bit more interesting if FDR had turned out of be some sort of malevolent demon who intentionally gave President Haines bad advice that eventually led to World War III. And, to be honest, I kept expecting that too happen. I kept expecting FDR’s eyes to suddenly burn like hellfire as he said, “Burn it! BURN IT TO THE GROUND!” But that never happened. Instead, this is one of those books where FDR is the greatest dead president ever and, in the end, middle-of-the-road liberalism keeps the world safe for democracy.

As you’re probably guessing, this is kind of a corny book but it is written with a lot of sincerity. One gets the feeling that Serling really did feel that, if only America’s leaders just looked to the ghost of FDR, every problem in the world would be solved. The book is also overwritten in the way that well-meaning, melodramatic novels of the past often were. One character is identified as having a “gnawing ulcer of doubt” deep in the “bowels of his conscience.” (Ewwwwwww!) That’s the type of book that this is. It’s definitely a product of its time but, if you’re a history nerd like me, that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

If anyone is haunting Air Force One, I personally hope that it’s Rutherford B. Hayes. He was the best!

Into the Dark, “Down”, Dir. Daniel Stamm, Review By Case Wright

Posted on October 1, 2019 by casewright

Down

Happy Horrorthon!!!!

Should some people embrace their creative mediocrity? YES! Yes, they should. I don’t mean that what they write or direct is bad. It’s simply unoriginal, predictable, with characters who make obviously bad decisions REPEATEDLY, and still are amazingly fun! I never thought I’d get into Lifetime movies until Lisa got me into them. I discovered how fun Hallmark movies are these past few years. Law & Order embraced its predictability so much that their main sponsor Listerine would break the show down in the Commercials: Body discovery, Wisecrack, Investigation and Arrest, Prosecution, and Verdict. Law & Order lasted 19 years. Case, what’s your point? My point is that mediocrity can be fun…a LOT of fun.

Hulu’s “Into the Dark” series is the fun trash that is great to watch and nothing more (accept for the episodes that are hamfisted, political, and preachy) ; it’s like the Jack in the Box Munchie Meals…yeah, they’ll give you a bit of diarrhea, but come on, sometimes you just gotta have a Sriracha Curly Fry Burger. That’s just science!

“Down” is awesomely bad. The actors mug, the character decisions are stupid, and it’s great for the elliptical or exercise bike and probably safer to watch as you’re burning those last Lbs. The plot is simple and doesn’t try to go into a supernatural direction. It’s fun because it never tries. Jennifer Robbins ( Natalie Martinez) is trapped in an elevator on a holiday weekend with Guy (Matt Luria), BUT is Guy hiding something sinister? Yes…yes, he is and you can tell because he mugs A LOT!

If Lifetime went down the horror route, this would be the premiere. Guy is in fact Jennifer’s stalker and manipulates her into having sex like the Lifetime movies with the Single Moms and the Predator Next Door. Lifetime movies are better than “Down” because with Lifetime movies once the heroine realizes she has to fight; it’s to the death. Here, when Jennifer realizes Guy is a Psycho Killer she doesn’t Run….Run…Away. In fact, he tries to kill her a lot and then she gets the upper hand, but does she finish him off? Nooooope. She fails to deliver the Coup de Gras not once, not twice…no, we’re talking six times here when she could’ve finished the movie and literally had a smoke after the 45 minute mark, but 45 minutes of filler was fine for my physical therapy time.

I know that this reads harsh, but these movies have their place; they’re fun. If the pacing and plot points matched with a Lifetime MOW, it would’ve been that much better, but you can’t have everything, nor should you! Will I review a bunch more of these Into the Dark quasi-episodes? YES, Yes I will!

Happy Horrorthon!

Titans S2Ep1, “Trigon”, Review by Case Wright (Dir. Carol Banker)

Posted on September 6, 2019 by casewright

titans-1

Welcome back! This has been a hard year for me in terms of reviewing season two and three shows-

Sabrina 2- garbage

Stranger Things 3- Just so very sad.

And then there was Titans. I was prepared for a sophomore slump like I had seen all year with my favorite shows and ….. it NEVER happened. Season 2 Episode 1 was like a new pilot of my most beloved show. It had family murder, a quasi Lucifer, and an introduction of Death Stroke, Bruce Wayne, a new Titans Headquarters, and a cure for male pattern baldness!

The episode picked up where it left off with Dick turned into an evil minion and the rest of the gang trying to help. Hawk and Dove go to Jason Todd and they all descend upon the EVIL Farmhouse …. and are invited in or are they? Trigon (Seamus Dever) is up to his old tricks of temptation, manipulation, and pagination – he’s really into orderly manuscripts; it can’t be all about world destruction.

The Titans fall one by one. Jason Todd is manipulated to kill his “older brother” Dick, Starfire is tricked into killing Rachel, Hank gets Dawn hooked on smack… yes smack…horse…the dragon…the boy…the beast…H…or dope. You even see the needle enter her arm and shoot it up. I’m not sure whether this show or Breaking Bad is darker? Maybe I need to watch something lighter like Disneyland being hit by a meteor or all the unicorns dying to Adiago For Strings. But, man oh man it is enthralling!!! I know that DCU is yet another subscription service, BUT it is worth every single penny to me! *Views expressed do not represent this blog, but are always correct. *

Once everyone is turned and Gar is nearly beaten to death by the now Evil Titans, Raven’s heart breaks allowing Trigon to fulfill his prophecy and start some earth destroying. He reaches into his daughter’s chest, crushes her beating heart, turns it into a ruby, and puts the stone on her forehead….and I thought my childhood Thanksgivings were awkward…HIYOOO! Then, Trigon goes full-on Lucifer, which almost made this a Horrorthon post.

Gar wakes and breaks Raven free of the curse and she kills/banishes her father. EPIC… JUST EPIC! Anywho, once the dust settles, we get introduced to our new villain Death Stroke (who apparently hates Jason Todd; I don’t know why because he really grows on you) and Bruce Wayne. This was a really good portrayal of an older aging Bruce- from father to Dick’s peer. The episode ends with the Titans in San Francisco in their familiar HQ to the fans of the animated series.

This show succeeded in so many ways. It’s deliciously 99% Cacao Dark. It has great action, great dialogue, heart wrenching failure and redemption. The performances, as always, were superb across the board. I will say that Jason Todd (Curran Walters) should get a spinoff of the Red Hood. He would be an amazing Anti-Hero and a clever take on a Batman like hero without ANY rules. Ahem Greg….Ahem! See you in a week!

Titans, S1 Ep7 & 8, Asylum, Donna Troy Review By Case Wright,

Posted on August 2, 2019 by casewright

titans-1

The asylum episode really didn’t have a lot going on. Rachel’s mother is in an asylum and they rescue her. Rachel thought her mom was dead. Nope, just held hostage at the Evil Well-funded Psyche unit? Sidenote: this psyche unit looks better funded than anything we have goin on in Seattle and we have a terrible homelessness problem.

Maybe, The Evil Group could franchise or just run our city for a couple of years? The Evil Group catches Dick and mind messes with him and he burns his Robin suit. That’s about it. Nothing great. Basically, it was a filler episode.

Donna Troy on the other hand is a fun episode. Donna Troy was Wonder Woman’s sidekick and we dig deeper into that history. It’s a lot more fun and goes deep into the inevitable PTSD heroes would have after years of violence.

The show opens back in Toronto…I mean Chicago. Rachel and her mom have bonded overnight. Really?! You haven’t seen her in…your whole life AND thought she was dead and you’re besties?! Word?

Dick’s “quit” … well kinda. He can’t figure out what to do with himself. So, he and Starfire break up and he heads to…..Vancouver..I guess. Anywho, Donna Troi AKA Wonder Girl AKA Darkstar AKA My Canadian Girlfriend…I swear! She hasn’t quit, but she is a photographer. I really didn’t know that was a photographer was a thing anymore. I figured that it was de-professionalized like journalism by the internet and the iPhone.

Meanwhile, Starfire and the rest of the group are traveling to Rachel’s mom’s farmhouse in the middle of nowhere. They get on a train and are nearly captured by the feds.

Dick is at Wonder Girl’s photography artshow and everything is normal. Just kidding, she’s made a Faustian deal to get hard edged photos of warlords for a fee. As you do. She goes to meet some evil guys for a photo shoot, but Dick follows her and he sees the evil dudes and beats the crap out of them. Donna is also quite the linguist and translates the pictures of an ancient language on Dick’s phone that will explain Rachel and her origin. FUN!!!

She gets through to him that Dick not done with being a hero, but he is done with Robin. Soon, he’ll be …. Nightwing!!!! Can’t wait!!! Dick and Troi do some research on the texts and decide to head to the farmhouse. Somehow they know the address and start heading on down.

Dick and Troi are still enroute and don’t think to give Rachel a ring. At the farmhouse, Rachel does a mindmeld on Starfire. BAD IDEA! She uncovers Starfire’s mission and identity to her. Unfortunately for Rachel, Starfire’s mission is to kill Rachel and stop her from bringing about the gotterdammerung. Starfire wakes and starts choking Rachel!!! SO EXCITING!!!