Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984.  Almost the entire show is currently streaming on Daily Motion, YouTube, Plex, and a host of other sites.

It’s time for another trip to the Island!

Episode 5.4 “The Last Cowboy/The Lady and the Monster”

(Dir by Don Chaffey, originally aired on October 31st, 1981)

For the second week in a row, Tattoo is notably absent in this episode.  He is seen in the stock footage that opens each episode of Fantasy Island.  Shortly afterwards, his pre-recorded voice is briefly heard when Mr. Roarke explains to Julie that Tattoo has been turned invisible so that he can help with the fantasy of another guest who is also invisible.  Seriously, that’s the excuse that the show goes with.  Tattoo is “there” but he can’t be seen.  I can only imagine what was going on behind-the-scenes with Herve Villechaize.  It’s easy to assume that Villechaize was holding out for more money but, to be honest, it’s almost too easy to assume that.  It’s also possible that Villechaize may have just asked for some time off to pursue his career as a singer.

As for the fantasies, the better of the two featured Lynda Day George as scientist Carla Frankenstein, who comes to the island because she wants to clear her ancestor’s reputation for being mad.  Fortunately, the castle of Baron Frankenstein just happens to be on the Island!  In the castle, Carla finds evidence that, rather than trying to bring the dead back to life, the Baron was instead working on ways to extend the average lifespan.  She also discovers that the Baron’s monster (played by veteran character actor William Smith) is still living in the castle!

The Monster is a dignified old soul who has been mistreated every time that he’s left the Castle.  Carla befriends him but again, the Monster is forced to confront the pettiness of the outside world when a corporate spy (Ken Swofford) tries to take both Carla and Julie hostage.  After Carla and Julia are rescued, the Monster retreats to the Castle but Carla promises that she will not only return to see him but that she will also continue her ancestor’s research.  In fact, her company is going to build a lab on the Island and presumably employ the one or two Islanders who aren’t already employed by Mr. Roarke.

This was a Halloween episode so a Frankenstein fantasy feels appropriate.  William Smith played the role of the Monster with a wounded dignity that was actually quite touching.  His lonely existence was quite sad and I was actually glad when Roarke suggested that he and Julie would, from now on, be joining the Monster for dinner.

As for the other fantasy, Joe Campbell (Stuart Whitman) is yet another city slicker who wants to be a cowboy.  Joe thinks that Roarke is going to send him to the old west, as he has done for so many other people with the exact same fantasy.  Instead, Roarke gets all technical and says that Joe’s specific fantasy was to be a cowboy and not to travel to the old west.  Joe finds himself working as a hired hand on a modern-day ranch.  Once Joe stops whining (and it takes a while), he falls in love with widow Margaret Blair (Diane Baker), becomes a surrogate father to Jimmy Blair (Jimmy Baio), and he chasess off an evil biker (Robert Tessier).  In the end, Joe asks for permission to remain at the ranch and Fantasy Island.  Roarke agrees, probably so Joe can potentially replace Julie if she ever asks for a raise like Tattoo did.

This fantasy felt a bit too familiar.  It’s always weird how Roarke will arbitrarily decide to be strict with some guests while letting others do whatever they want.

Anyway, here’s hoping Tattoo returns next week!