Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 1.19 “Crash Diet”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983.  The entire show is currently streaming on Freevee!

This week, Ponch gets to be a hero!  Take that, Baker!

Episode 1.19 “Crash Diet”

(Dir by Don McDougall, originally aired on February 23rd, 1978)

There’s a madman on the freeway and his name is Leonard!

Leonard (Herman Poppe) is a veteran who suffered a traumatic brain injury while serving in Vietnam.  He returned home and was making good progress until his wife was killed in a car accident.  (Leonard was the one driving.)  Leonard now hates cars and, after running away from both his sister’s house and the VA hospital, Leonard sets up camp off the highway.  Occasionally, he’ll jump out of the shadows and throw dirt at a motorist.  Leonard isn’t trying to hurt anyone but those big clumps of dirt take people by surprise.  When he throws a clump of dirt at Ponch, the cops get involved.

Ponch makes it his mission to find Leonard and help him get the help that he needs.  And, for once, Ponch manages to do just that.  Yay Ponch!  Yet, it seems odd that Baker would not be more involved with this case, as it has previously been established that Baker is also a vet and that he also served in Vietnam.  One would think that Baker would be somewhat invested in helping Leonard but, in this episode, Baker is mostly along for the ride.

Maybe Baker is preoccupied with the nude volleyball team that he met at the start of the episode.  When he and Ponch pulled over a van to give the driver a ticket, they were shocked to discover that the van was full of naked women.  It turns out that the local naturalist community has their own volleyball league and the women are all players.  Later, Baker and Ponch come across the now-clothed women playing in the park.  Ponch and Baker play a game and totally get their asses kicked.  That was satisfying to watch.

Meanwhile, Division wants each precinct to lost a total of 1,000 pounds by the end of the week.  (It’s like the Weight Loss episode of The Office.)  Officer Grossman (Paul Linke) worries that he won’t be able to lose 18 pounds in time.  Baker and Ponch each agree to lose an extra five pounds so Grossman will only have to lose 8.  Awwww!  Then they pull a prank that makes Getraer think that he’s gained 10 pounds.  That was kind of mean but I guess Getraer deserved it for …. for what?  Trying to make everyone eat healthy and take care of their bodies?

This episode was a mixed bag.  The show’s trademark chases were pretty lackluster this week.  But I thought Leonard’s story was well-handled, well-intentioned, and sensitively acted.  (Yes, even by Erik Estrada.)  As well, Paul Linke had some funny moments as Grossman.  This episode may not have been CHiPs at its best but it was still an entertaining 40 minutes.

Monday Live Tweet Alert: Join Us For The Firm!


As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in hosting a few weekly live tweets on twitter and occasionally Mastodon.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of Mastodon’s #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We snark our way through it.

Tonight, for #MondayActionMovie, the film will be 1989’s The Firm! I picked it so you know it’ll be good.

It should make for a night of fun viewing and I invite all of you to join in.  If you want to join the live tweets, just hop onto Mastodon, find the link to the playlist under my account, hit play at 8 pm et, and use the #MondayActionMovie hashtag!  The live tweet community is a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.   

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.7 “Junk Love”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, Sonny and Rico somehow still manage to work undercover.

Episode 2.7 “Junk Love”

(Dir by Michael O’Herlihy, originally aired on November 8th, 1985)

“What’s a four letter word for dirt?” Switek asks, while on a stakeout.

“Mud,” Zito offers before correcting himself, “I mean …. sand!”

However, according to Switek, the correct answer is Vice!

And indeed, there’s a lot of dirt to be found in this week’s rather sordid episode of Miami Vice.  A raid on a brothel leads the Vice Squad to arrest a notorious smuggler and pimp named Ivory Jones (legendary Jazz musician, Miles Davis) and one of Ivory’s girls, a strung-out junkie named Rosella (Ely Pouget).  When they find out that Rosella is apparently the girlfriend of a notorious dealer named Juan Carlos Silva (Jose Perez), they decide to use her and Ivory to take Silva down.  While Tubbs is convinced that Rosella will say anything get her next fix, Crockett is convinced that Rosella is someone who truly wants to change her life.  Hmmm …. isn’t Crockett usually the cynical one?

Silva is sexually obsessed with Rosella, to the extent that he’ll even kill the members of his own organization if he thinks they’re interested in her.  The episode’s twist comes towards the end, when Gina does some research and discovers that Silva is not only Rosella’s lover but also her …. ick! …. father!  Ewwwww!  As with so many episodes of Miami Vice, Junk Love ends with Sonny watching helplessly as a victimized woman throws away her freedom so that she can shoot her tormenter.  Miami Vice was a show that always managed to be downbeat, even when the bad guys met a deserved end.

This episode felt like an attempt to recreate the emotional drama of the season one episode that featured Bruce Willis as an arms dealer with an abused wife.  Both episodes even feature the same basic ending, just with the setting moved from the courthouse steps to a yacht.  Unfortunately, this episode doesn’t work anywhere half as well as any of the episodes that aired during the first season.  Jose Perez may be playing an evil character but he simply does not have an intimidating enough screen presence to be convincing in the role.  Miles Davis, meanwhile, delivers his lines convincingly enough but his character disappears in such a way that it almost feels as if he left the set before all of his scenes were filmed.

The main thing that I found myself thinking about, as I watched this episode, was how could Sonny Crockett and Rico Tubbs still convincingly go undercover after two years of busting drug kingpin after drug kingpin.  You would think the entire Miami underworld would be on the lookout for them.  Instead, Sonny is still somehow convincing everyone that he’s actually “Sonny Burnett,” aspiring drug dealer.  I’m starting to think the criminals in Miami might not be that smart.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Degrassi Junior High 2.10 “Censored”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sunday, I will be reviewing the Canadian series, Degrassi Junior High, which aired on CBC and PBS from 1987 to 1989!  The series can be streamed on YouTube!

This week, Degrassi tackles freedom of the press and freedom of lockers.

Episode 2.10 “Censored”

(Dir by Mike Douglas, originally aired on March 7th, 1988)

The inside of Joey’s locker is covered with pin-ups.  When L.D. and Alexa walk by and see Joey, Wheels, and Snake rating the pin-ups, L.D. is offended while Alexa is amused.  (Alexa, I have to admit, has become the character to whom I relate on this show.)  When Joey the announces that he would only rate L.D. “a four,” L.D. responds by covering the inside of her locker with pictures of half-naked men.  L.D. then goes to the principal to complain about Joey’s pin-ups.  When Joey gets in trouble, he complains about L.D.’s locker.  In the end, both Joey and L.D. end up in school suspension together.  Awwwwww!

However, that’s not the only case of censorship in this episode!  When Caitlin overhears the principal talking to two parents who want Spike to be forbidden to attend school until she gives birth, Caitlin decides to use the power of the press.  She writes an editorial called “Keep Spike At Degrassi,” in which she announces that everyone knows that Spike is pregnant and that Spike should be allowed to continue to go to class.  Everyone who reads it says that it’s the best thing that Caitlin has even written but Mr. Radish, the faculty advisor to the school newspaper, announces that it is a violation of school policy and that it can’t be published.  So, Caitlin decides to print up several copies of the editorial and then just hand them out to students in the hallway.

Now, you may have noticed that Caitlin did not talk to Spike before writing or printing up her editorial.  And, to Caitlin’s shock, Spike is not at all happy about the editorial, explaining that she’s under enough stress without everyone at the school reading about her life.  Spike feels that Caitlin used her and Spike is totally correct.  Everyone tells Caitlin that she’s a great writer and she’s a hero for standing up to the school administration but Spike is still pretty much alone and isolated at school.  The episode ends with a classic depressing Degrassi freeze frame, this time of Spike walking up the school’s front steps and looking totally alone.

With this episode, Caitlin becomes the first of many crusading journalists to pass through the halls of Degrassi.  What sets this story apart from future episodes about the school newspaper is its willingness to admit that not all issues are as a simple as they originally appear.  I appreciated the fact that Spike was given a chance to call out Caitlin for essentially using Spike’s problems to promote herself and I liked the fact that the show didn’t pretend like there was some sort of easy or perfect solution for any of the issues that both Spike and Caitlin were dealing with.

Degrassi Junior High has often been called the most realistic and honest teen show ever made and episodes like this one show why.

Lisa Marie’s Week In Review: 3/18/24 — 3/24/24


As I spend this Holy Week with my sisters, I shall be keeping Kate Middleton in my thoughts.

I’ve seen a lot of social media posts over the past few days that all, more or less, say that, “We should all feel ashamed for spreading rumors about William and Kate.”  While I agree that there are a lot of people who should be ashamed, I don’t really appreciate this “we” business.  I didn’t make a single joke, post a single rumor, or otherwise join in the online harassment of Kate and William.  The same is true of most of the people that I know.  Most people are better than that.  If anyone should feel ashamed, it’s the members of the media who spread rumors and innuendo for clicks and attention.  Don’t let them get away with pretending everyone else was in on it with them.

Here’s what I watched, read, and listened to this week:

Films I Watched:

  1. Coherence (2014)
  2. Fatal Deviation (1998)
  3. In Broad Daylight (1971)
  4. One Night With The King (2006)
  5. Premonition (2007)
  6. War-Gods of the Deep (1965)

Television Shows I Watched:

  1. Abbott Elementary
  2. Blind Date
  3. Changing Patterns
  4. Check It Out
  5. CHiPs
  6. Degrassi Junior High
  7. Dr. Phil
  8. Fantasy Island
  9. Friday the 13th: The Series
  10. Highway to Heaven
  11. Jenny Jones
  12. The Love Boat
  13. Miami Vice
  14. Monsters
  15. The N.Y. Friars Club Roast of Chevy Chase
  16. The Phil Donahue Story
  17. Quiet On The Set
  18. Sally Jessy Raphael
  19. T and T
  20. The Trisha Goddard Show
  21. Welcome Back Kotter

Books I Read:

  1. A Death in Canaan (1977) by Joan Barthel

Music To Which I Listened:

  1. Adi Ulmansky
  2. Amy Winehouse
  3. Avril Lavigne
  4. Bambie Thug
  5. Big Data
  6. Bon Jovi
  7. Britney Spears
  8. The Chemical Brothers
  9. David Bowie
  10. David Naughton
  11. DJ Khaled
  12. Elton John
  13. Haim
  14. Katrina and the Waves
  15. Katy Perry
  16. Kool & The Gang
  17. Kylie Minogue
  18. The Maccabeats
  19. Madness
  20. Marko Hietala
  21. P!nk
  22. Public Service Broadcasting
  23. Queen
  24. Saint Motel
  25. Sia
  26. Softcult
  27. Stephen Bishop
  28. Taylor Swift
  29. Tomoyasu Hotei
  30. Tish Melton

Live Tweets:

  1. Fatal Deviation
  2. Premonition
  3. War-Gods of the Deep
  4. Coherence

Trailers:

  1. Alien: Romulus

News From Last Week:

  1. Princess Catherine reveals her cancer diagnosis.
  2. Kate Middleton ‘wrote every word’ of emotional speech announcing cancer diagnosis
  3. ‘Shame on You’: Stephen Colbert Torn Apart for Spreading Affair Rumors About Cancer-Stricken Kate Middleton and Prince William
  4. Rose Hanbury’s lawyers send legal notice to Stephen Colbert over Prince William affair joke: report
  5. Blake Lively apologizes for mocking Kate Middleton ‘Photoshop fails’ after princess reveals cancer diagnosis
  6. Kim Kardashian taken to task for not removing ‘insensitive’ Kate Middleton post
  7. Actor M. Emmet Walsh Dies At 88

Links From Last Week:

  1. I Hope You All Feel Terrible Now: How the internet—and Stephen Colbert—hounded Kate Middleton into revealing her diagnosis
  2. Colbert, Cohen, Kardashian: All should be ashamed of mocking Kate Middleton’s ‘disappearance’
  3. Happy New Year (for real)
  4. Tater’s Picks of Madness
  5. Do 007’s “Diamonds” Sparkle? Sean Connery’s James Bond Is Back – But It Could Have Been Burt Reynolds!

Links From The Site:

  1. I reviewed Degrassi Junior High, Miami Vice, CHiPs, Baywatch Nights, Fantasy Island, The Love Boat, Monsters, Changing Patterns, Highway to Heaven, T and T, Friday the 13th, Welcome Back Kotter, Check it Out, and In Broad Daylight!
  2. I shared my week in television!
  3. I shared a scene from Blood Simple!
  4. I shared music videos from Sia, Brian Eno, Tish Melton, Marko Hietala, Softcult, The Maccabeats, and Bambie Thug!
  5. Erin shared Beach Heat, The Brass God, Island Ecstasy Coronet, Summer Heat, Dime Mystery Magazine, and Palm Sunday!

More From Us:

  1. At her photography site, Erin shared Church Path, Lamp, Trash, Untitled, Butterfly, Creeping, and Rock!
  2. At my music site, I shared songs from Avril Lavigne, Amy Winehouse, Katy Perry, Amy Winehouse (again), Haim, Big Data, and Tomoyasu Hotei!

Want to check out last week?  Click here!

Retro Television Review: In Broad Daylight (dir by Robert Day)


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sundays, I will be reviewing the made-for-television movies that used to be a primetime mainstay.  Today’s film is 1971’s In Broad Daylight!  It  can be viewed on YouTube.

Tony Chappel (Richard Boone) is an actor who has just recently lost his sight as a result of an accident.  Released from the hospital, Tony struggles to adjust to living in a world without his vision.  When one cab driver says to him, “Didn’t you used to be Tony Chappel?,” he flinches as he realizes that his career as a famous actor is now considered to be over.  One day, he comes home early and overhears his wife (Stella Stevens) fooling around with his lawyer and “best friend” (Fred Beir).  Tony promptly decides to murder his wife and frame his friend for the crime.

Tony decides to use his acting skills to his advantage.  He memorizes the the area around him so that he can make his way through it by memory.  He puts on a fake beard, speaks with Greek accent, and makes a point of carrying a camera with him.  He starts taking public transportation and going out of his way to be talkative and social  Everyone that he meets, he tells them about how he’s been taking pictures of the city and how he can’t wait to see how they come out.  When his wife is eventually murdered, the police receive a reports of a mysterious Greek man, one who was definitely not blind, in the area.  However, Lt. Bergman (John Marley) has his doubts and comes to suspect that Tony is the killer.

In Broad Daylight was made from an early script written by Larry Cohen, who would later go on to direct films like God Told Me To.  It’s a clever script, one that sets up an intriguing premise and which ends on a properly twisty and satisfactory note.  The film works because it is as much of a character study as a thriller.  Tony’s wife not only cheats on him but also betrays him at the moment when he needs her and his friends the most.  Tony has gone from being a movie star to being a man who can barely walk from one room to another.  He’s already angry.  Discovering that his wife is laughing at him behind his back is the last straw.

Larry Cohen reportedly felt that Richard Boone was miscast as Tony.  I felt that Boone did a pretty good job, even if he did overact a bit while Tony was trying to convince everyone that he was a Greek tourist.  Stella Stevens is perfectly cast as his wife and Suzanne Pleshette is sympathetic as his nurse.  Godfather fans will be happy to see John Marley not having to deal with a horse’s head but instead playing the clever detective who attempts to solve the murder.

In Broad Daylight is a clever and entertaining thriller and character study.