Retro Television Review: Hang Time 1.5 “Oh Captain, My Captain” and 1.6 “Earl Makes The Grade”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Hang Time, which ran on NBC from 1995 to 2000.  The entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!

The season has finally begun.  Julie won one game.  Michael lost one game.  Danny and Sam are now a couple.  Will Deering High continue its winning/losing ways?  Let’s find out!

Hang Time!

Episode 1.5 “Oh Captain, My Captain”

(Directed by Howard Murray, originally aired on September 30th, 1995)

In order to shake up the team and hopefully have a winning season, Coach Fuller decides to switch around everyone’s positions.  I have to admit that, while watching this episode, I was forced to reflect on how little I actually know about basketball.  For instance, I was stunned to discover that the players have specific positions.  I honestly thought that everyone just ran around the court and tried to steal the ball.

Chris isn’t happy about having to switch positions because he thinks that it might make it more difficult for him to get a college scholarship.  (Chris is like 5’7 so maybe it would be a good idea for him to at least consider other options.)  Chris resigns as team captain.  Coach Fuller appoints Danny as the new team captain.  Teams have captains?  I’m learning a lot from this show.  Eventually, Chris learns to put the team first and Danny hands the captainship (or whatever it’s called) back over to him.

In the B-plot, Michael gets a job working at Earl’s farm.  Chaos ensues but Michael learns an important lesson about how difficult farm work is.

This episode had one good joke, in which Mary Beth sent Coach Fuller a legal summons because her father gave her an attorney for her birthday and she figured she should make use of her presents.  

Otherwise, this episode had a bit too much basketball for me, which is obviously kind of a silly complaint to make about a show that’s about basketball.  I have to admit that this show doesn’t do much for my rebellious spirit.  The main lesson was always to listen to the coach and put the team first.  Bleh.  BE A REBEL!

Episode 1.6 “Earl Makes The Grade”

(Directed by Howard Murray, originally aired on October 14th, 1995)

Deering High has a game coming up against their hated rivals, Valley High …. oh wait a minute. Sorry, Valley High was Bayside’s rival. Deering High is going up against Dover High. Earl, however, is flunking history. He has to pass his big midterm if he’s going to play. Unfortunately, a new girl is distracting Earl from studying. She’s making him stay up late and kissing him whenever he tries to study. It turns out that it’s all a plot to keep Earl from playing in the game, like that time Valley stole Screech’s lucky beret right before the big chess match. After Earl’s new girlfriend framed him for cheating on the test, Coach Fuller declared, “You let your team down, Earl.”

Good Lord, is it a team or is it a cult?

Anyway, everything works out due to the TNBC law of people always doing obviously stupid stuff. Immediately after Earl gets kicked off the team, Earl’s fake girlfriend started making out with a player on the other team in Deering High’s gym, right in the middle of the Deering/Dover game. Anyway, once it becomes clear that Earl was framed, he’s allowed to rejoin the team and Dover gets destroyed. Yay!

The B-plot dealt with a prank war between Julie and Danny. Remember the Bayside/Valley prank war?

My point is that this was pretty much a Saved By The Bell episode that got reused on Hang Time. That said, Robert Michael Ryan gave a pretty good performance as Earl and you actually did feel sorry for him when he discovered how cruelly he had been treated. Earl was just too innocent for this world.

Will Deering continue to win their games? Check back next week to find out!

Monday Live Tweet Alert: Join Us For Cyborg Cop and Best Seller!


As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in hosting a few weekly live tweets on twitter.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We tweet our way through it.

Tonight, for #MondayActionMovie, the film will be 1993’s Cyborg Cop!  Selected and hosted by BunnyHero, Cyborg Cop stars David Bradley and John Rhys-Davies.  It’s a film about a cyborg who is a cop! The movie starts at 8 pm et and it is available on YouTube.

 

Following #MondayActionMovie, Brad and Sierra will be hosting the #MondayMuggers live tweet.  We will be watching 1987’s Best Seller, a classic thriller starring James Woods as an assassin and Brian Dennehy as the cop-turned-author who Woods wants to tell his story.  Both Dennehy and Woods give excellent performances in this conspiracy-themed thriller.  It is available on both Prime and Tubi and it starts at 10 pm et.

 

It should make for a night of intense viewing and I invite all of you to join in.  If you want to join the live tweets, just hop onto twitter, start Cyborg Cop at 8 pm et, and use the #MondayActionMovie hashtag!  Then, at 10 pm et, start Best Seller and use the #MondayMuggers hashtag!  The live tweet community is a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.  And reviews of these films will probably end up on this site at some point over the next few weeks. 

The Scandalous Covers of Whisper


Whisper  was a pulp magazine that was published in the 40s and the 50s.  It promised “a look through the keyhole” and the majority of the stories were about public and private scandals.  Today, the scandals are forgotten but Peter Driben’s cover art is remembered and sought by collectors.

Here is a sampling of the covers of Whisper.  All of these were illustrated (and signed) by pin-up artist Peter Driben.  As with most of Driben’s pin-up covers, the models are meant to be both sexy and innocent at the same time.  The headlines provide a look at what was once considered to be shocking in America.

 

Music Video of the Day: Misunderstanding by Genesis (1980, directed by Stuart Orme)


In today’s music video of the day, Genesis takes ua on a tour of Los Angeles in 1980.  Technically, the video is actually about Phil Collins driving around the city and searching for his girlfriend but mostly, that was just an excuse to show off Los Angeles and to perhaps announce that the new, post-Peter Gabriel Genesis was ready to conquer Hollywood.

According to Tony Banks, this song was meant to serve as an homage to the Beach Boys.  That probably explains Phil’s Hawaiian shirt.

This video was directed by Stuart Orme, who directed several videos for both Genesis as a group and Phil Collins as a solo act.

Enjoy!

Lisa Marie’s Week In Review: 9/12/22 — 9/18/22


Jean-Luc Godard, R.I.P.

Films I Watched:

  1. Corrective Measures (2022)
  2. The Decline of Western Civilization (1981)
  3. Father Stu (2022)
  4. Flight 93 (2006)
  5. Honk For Jesus.  Saved Your Soul. (2022)
  6. I Came By (2022)
  7. Mikey (1992)
  8. Revolver (1993)
  9. Road House (1989)
  10. Seven (1995)
  11. Twin Dragon Encounter (1986)

Television Shows I Watched:

  1. Atlanta
  2. The Bachelorette
  3. Big Brother
  4. The Challenge
  5. Devil in Ohio
  6. The Emmys
  7. Fantasy Island
  8. Full House
  9. Inspector Lewis
  10. The Love Boat
  11. Mike Judge’s Beavis and Butt-Head
  12. Monarch

Books I Read:

  1. The KGB Candidate (1988) by Owen Sela

Music To Which I Listened:

  1. Avril Lavigne
  2. Britney Spears
  3. The Chemical Brothers
  4. Christina Aguilers
  5. Coldplay
  6. David Guetta
  7. Gwen Stefani
  8. Jessica Simpson
  9. Kaiser Chiefs
  10. Kedr Livanskiy
  11. Kelis
  12. The Killers
  13. Lindsay Lohan
  14. Moby
  15. Muse
  16. The Prodigy
  17. Saint Motel
  18. Taylor Swift

Live Tweets:

  1. Flight 93
  2. Seven
  3. Road House
  4. Mikey

Trailers:

  1. Babylon

News From Last Week:

  1. Director Jean-Luc Godard Has Died
  2. Actor Henry Silva Dies At 95
  3. Greek actress Irene Papas has Died
  4. Axel Jodorowsky Dies At 57
  5. Woody Allen Announces His Retirement From Filmmaking
  6. Quinta Brunson had to step over Jimmy Kimmel to accept her Emmy
  7. Jimmy Kimmel apologizes for stealing Quinta Brunson’s moment as she crashes his monologue
  8. Sheryl Lee Ralph Addresses Jimmy Kimmel Crashing Quinta Brunson’s Emmys Speech: ‘Ooh, the Disrespect!’
  9. Kevin Smith says Dogma is being held hostage by Harvey Weinstein
  10. Harvey Weinstein asks judge for fake teeth before sex crimes trial

Links From Last Week:

  1. Ezra Miller’s “Messiah” Delusions: Inside The Flash Star’s Dark Spiral
  2. The World’s Common Tater’s Week in Books, Movies, and TV 9/16/22
  3. Could You Live “Faraway?” Lucy Irvine’s South Seas Adventures As A “Castaway!”

Links From The Site:

  1. Erin shared Our Flag, Carrying The Flag, Negative Sunburst, The Covers of All-American Fiction, The Greenest Greens The Reddest Reds, The View From The Front Door, Richland, Looking and Searching, Ferris Wheel, and Graffiti!
  2. Jeff shared music videos from John Parr, Megadeth, R.E.M., Guns N Roses, Journey, The Human League, and Madness!  He also paid tribute to Henry Silva!
  3. I reviewed Hang Time, The Love Boat, Fantasy Island, City Guys, One World, California Dreams, and Quarterback Princess!
  4. I shared a scene from Band of Outsiders!
  5. I shared my week in television, an amv of the day, and a commercial featuring Renee Zellweger stalking her neighbor!
  6. I paid tribute to Jean-Luc Godard!

More From Us:

  1. At Horror Critic, I reviewed Last Shift, Flesh Feast, Teenage Caveman, and Mikey!
  2. At her photography site, Erin shared Loner, Dusk, The Coming Fall, King Bird, Trail Closed, Spring Creek, and Fountain!
  3. I reviewed Big Brother for the Big Brother Blog!
  4. At Pop Politics, Jeff shared Why Biden Is The Way He Is, The Final Primary Night Of The Season, We’ve Seen Fire and We’ve Seen Rain, Look Out It’s Aviator Joe, Petty Questions For Petty Times, The Freak Out, Lemon To Mornings, Football Thoughts, and On Approval Ratings!
  5. At Reality TV Chat Blog, I shared Week 10 Veto Meeting, A New Showmance, It’s Time Open Up The Diary Room For Week 10, About Tonight, Things Are Moving Quickly, and Things Are Moving Slowly!
  6. At my online dream journal, I shared Last Night’s Walk Dream, Last Night’s Confession Dream, Last Night’s Construction Dream, Last Night’s High School Dream, Last Night’s Arkansas Dream, Last Night’s Interviewing A Celebrity Dream, and Last Night’s Shoplifting Dream!
  7. At my music site, I shared songs from Britney Spears, Avril Lavigne, The Killers, David Guetta, Kelis, The Prodigy, and Kaiser Chiefs!

Want to see what I did last week?  Click here!

Retro Television Review: Quarterback Princess (dir by Noel Black)


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sundays, I will be reviewing the made-for-television movies that used to be a primetime mainstay.  Today’s film is 1983’s Quarterback Princess.  It  can be viewed on YouTube!

Quarterback Princess begins with Ralph Maida (Don Murray) dropping in on the coach of a high school football team in the small town of Minnvile, Oregon.  Ralph explains that he and his family are going to be relocating to the town from Canada.  His eldest child wants to play football and Ralph is curious as to when the team will be holding the tryouts.  The coach asks what position Ralph’s son plays.  Ralph explains that Tami is his daughter and she plays quarterback.  After an awkward moment of silence, the coach explains that he’ll have to talk to the school board.

Yes, Quarterback Princess is one of those films.  It’s an only girl on the team film, in which an athletic teenager has to convince not only her male teammates but also all of the stodgy old people that she can play just as well as the boys.  On the one hand, films (and shows, as Degrassi had an entire storyline about Jane trying to get on the school’s football team) like this are usually entertaining because it’s fun to watch a girl succeed while all of the men sputter with outrage until the team starts winning.  On the other hand, they’re always a little bit difficult for me to relate to because I would honestly have no interest in doing what Tami’s doing and it’s hard for me to understand why anyone else would either.  I mean, seriously why would anyone want to live in Oregon when Montana’s just a short drive away?

Quarterback Princess is based on a true story.  In real life, Tami Maida was 14 year old when she joined her high school football team as their quarterback.  That season, the team had a record of 7-1 and they won the state championship.  Tami was also elected Homecoming Queen that seem year.  The parts of the movie that seem like the type of thing that only a screenwriter could come up actually happened.  Helen Hunt, who was 20 years old at the time, plays Tami.  When I watched the film, I thought Hunt did a good job in the scenes off field but I thought she was a bit unconvincing when she was actually playing the game and throwing the ball.  Fortunately, I did some research before I actually wrote this review and I discovered that Tami served as Helen Hunt’s stand-in during the film and, in most of the game scenes, that actually is Tami throwing the ball and running around the field.  That shows you how much I know about football.

Quarterback Princes is definitely a made-for-television production.  These are the only high school football players in existence who neither drink nor curse.  For that matter, the coaches are surprisingly nice as well.  That said, it isn’t bad.  The best scenes are the ones that feature Tami and her family adjusting to Tami’s sudden fame.  Daphne Zuniga gives a sympathetic performance as Tami’s sister, who is not particularly happy about how Tami’s sudden fame has changed everyone’s lives.  The always likable John Stockwell plays Tami’s boyfriend and the two of them are a believable couple.  Noel Black, who also directed Pretty Poison, does a good job of keeping the action moving at a steady pace.  Probably the worse thing you can say about this film is that it was a bit predictable but, in this case, all of the predictable stuff actually happened so what can you do?

Music Video of the Day: Waiting For the Ghost Train by Madness (1986, directed by ????)


Who is waiting for the ghost train?

As with many of Madness’s songs, this one is open to multiple interpretations.  The song is about a group of people waiting for a train that seems to be destined never to actually come, which is a metaphor for life that would do Samuel Beckett proud.  Though the band was not often thought of as being a political band, Madness’s lead singer, Suggs, has said that the song was also meant to be a commentary on South African apartheid.  The reference to the station master writing out cancellations in orange chalk is also a reference to the colors of what was then South Africa’s flag.

Enjoy!

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 9/11/22 — 9/17/22


Though I’ve been busy getting ready for October, I still found time to watch a few things!

Atlanta (Thursday Night, FX)

Donald Glover’s wonderfully surreal series has returned for its fourth and final season.  The first two episodes aired on FX this week.

The first episode was strange, funny, and more than a little creepy.  Darius’s attempts to return a gift that he didn’t need led to him being pursued by a knife-wielding white woman in a wheelchair.  Al’s attempt to honor the memory of a recently deceased singer led him on a scavenger hunt and it also served as a rather moving meditation on just what exactly it means to be famous and whether or not anyone actually pays attention to the lyrics of the music to which they listen.  Finally, Earn and Van found themselves trapped in some weird section of Atlanta where they kept running into people that they had dated.  Along with letting everyone know that the show had returned from Europe, this episode was a perfect example of the show’s dream logic.

The second episode is one that I’m still processing.  The ending presents the viewer with a bit of a litmus test.  Who do you feel bad for, Earn or the woman whose life he ruined?  Is it possible to feel bad for both of them?  Even if it’s possible to do so, should you feel bad for both of them?  Reading the reactions online, I was reminded of something that Spike Lee pointed out about Do The Right Thing, in that black audiences were outraged that the police killed Radio Raheem while white audiences were usually more upset about Sal losing his business.  It was a thought-provoking episode.  It was also one that finally gave audiences a look into Earn’s mind, revealing not only why he dropped out of Princeton but also that he was the victim of childhood abuse.  (That might explain the nightmare that he had a the start of the third season.)  The episode ended with Earn celebrating his elaborate revenge while also realizing that he he needed to return to the therapy.

The Bachelorette (Tuesday Night, ABC)

So, after the end of the first part of the finale (seriously, of all the seasons to drag out, why this one?), Gabby is pretty much stuck with Erich and Rachel is stuck with Tino.  I don’t see any of this ending well.  To be honest, Erich has every right to be concerned about the idea of getting engaged on a reality show.  And Aden had every right to be worried about what his relationship with Rachel would be like once the show ended.  But, as many have pointed out, everyone knows what they’re getting into when they sign up to appear on this show.

So, in short, I have sympathy for no one but Meatball.

Big Brother 24 (24/7, CBS and Paramount Plus)

The season’s nearly over!  I’ve been writing about all of it at the Big Brother Blog!

The Challenge (Wednesday Night, CBS)

The Challenge came to a two-hour conclusion this week.  Enzo and Tyson …. well, neither one of them was the winner.  It’s always strange when the people who dominate a reality show don’t end up winning.  Instead, Danny and Sarah won.  I was happy to see that two Survivors won the game but still, it’s kind of like who cares?

The Emmys (Monday Night, NBC)

Eh.  The Emmys never really do much for me and I have to admit that I largely had the show on for background noise.  (I was actually watching two movies — Flight 93 and then Seven — while occasionally checking in with the Emmys.)  I was happy that Amanda Seyfried won but Yellowjackets losing to Succession and Barry losing to Ted Lasso pretty much ruined the night for me.  As well, how did Bob Odenkirk not win an Emmy?

Jimmy Kimmel getting dragged for his stupid “passed out” routine was the most entertaining part of the night.  Many have correctly pointed out that he intruded on Quinta Brunson’s moment.  Technically, his joke would have intruded on any winner’s moment but the fact that it occurred while the first black woman to win the Emmy for Outstanding Writing For A Comedy Series attempted to give her acceptance speech definitely made matters worse.

Of course, some of this is the risk you take whenever you have a comedian serve as a presenter at an awards show.  That’s one reason why I cringe whenever I see a certain former SNL star presenting an Oscar or a Golden Globe because I automatically know that there’s no way he’s going to give up the spotlight without a fight.

Devil in Ohio (Netflix)

This miniseries is about a psychiatrist (in Ohio!) who allows a girl to live with her and her family after the girl escapes from a Satanic cult that is led by her father (in Oho!).  Emily Deschanel plays the psychiatrist and gives a performance that will really leave you wishing they had cast Zooey instead.

I watched the first episode on Monday morning and it felt almost like a parody of a typical Netflix show, right down to the middling performances, the unnecessary filler, and the performative wokeness.  A good deal of the show dealt with Deschanel’s daughter starting a new year in high school.  She has a crush on the editor of the school newspaper and I have to admit that I laughed out loud when he approached her and he just happened to be wearing a “Notorious RBG” t-shirt.  I’m sure that’s really a hot seller in rural Ohio.

As for the show itself, I was pretty bored and I doubt I’m going to watch more of it.

Full House (Sunday Evening, MeTV)

Aunt Becky finally had the twins!  For some reason, the birth was broadcast on Good Morning, San Francisco.  Why would Aunt Becky agree to this?  Anyway, I guess Uncle Jesse’s going to have to give up his silly dreams of rock stardom and become an adult now, right?

Inspector Lewis (YouTube)

Lewis and Hobson are a cute couple but there are still murders to be solved.  And Hathaway is still struggling with all the evil in the world.  The episode that I watched this week featured an elderly professor getting run over by a car.  I hate to admit it but I watched the episode on Tuesday and, as I type of this review on Saturday, I can’t remember who the murderer was.  I just know that Lewis didn’t seem to be as a depressed as usual and that’s good thing.

The Love Boat (Paramount+)

On the one hand, this show makes me want to go on a cruise.  But, on the other hand, I specifically want to go on a cruise in 1977 and I want all of the passengers to be a mix of television actors and retired movie stars.  I need a time machine.

Mike Judge’s Beavis and Butt-Head (Paramount+)

Old Beavis and Butt-Head kind of freak me out but it was still fun to watch them serve on a jury.  That said, I was still relieved when the younger and more hopeful versions of the characters appeared in the episode’s second story.  The Freaky Friday twist was nice.  I liked how the dude waited for his girlfriend to go into the 7-11 before he smashed Beavis and Butt-Head’s heads together for a second time.  That was considerate of him.

Monarch (Tuesday Night, FOX)

This is the latest attempt at a guilty pleasure soap from a network that specializes in them.  Trace Adkins and Susan Sarandon play Albie and Dottie Roman, the King and Queen of Country Music.  Judging from the first episode, it looks like it could be fun.  Albie is known as being “the Texas truth teller” but has a history of infidelity.  Dottie is dying and has frequent visions of a burning barn.  All of the children are angry with each other for one reason or another.  Like I said, fun.

If nothing else, you have to appreciate the bizarre pairing of the unapologetically conservative Trace Adkins with outspoken Sanders supporter Susan Sarandon.  It’s fun to imagine the set of the show, with Adkins having a beer and talking about his new truck while Sarandon harangues everyone to read Das Kapital.  Anyway, this show seems like it could be melodramatic enough to hold my interest.  I’ll give it a chance.

The premiere episode ended, in true cliffhanger fashion, with Dottie apparently dying.  We’ll see if she’s actually dead or not next week, I guess.  If she is dead, will Sarandon appear in flashbacks or as a ghost?  I’m hoping as a ghost.