What Lisa and the Snarkalecs Watched Last Night #66: Tasmanian Devils (dir by Zach Lipovsky)

(Minor Spoilers)

Last night, the Snarkalecs and I watched the SyFy original movie Tasmanian Devils.  Who are the Snarkalecs?  You can find out here.

Why Was I Watching It?

Seriously, yesterday was a weird, weird day.  I don’t even know where to begin.  In between the pervy guys who have been working on the roof of the house across the alley, and the woman in Georgia who keeps accusing me of having an affair with her husband (another long story that you can read all about here), I was seriously ready to just change my name to Diabla, stop washing my hair, stop wearing makeup, and just move to Vermont.

But, through it all, I took the strength for the knowledge that, at 8:00, there would be an original movie on SyFy and that I would be watching it with my friends, the Snarkalecs…

What’s It About?

I’ll tell you what it’s not about.  It’s not about the spinning cartoon character who was always falling off cliffs and having safes dropped on his head.  No, these Tasmanian devils are vicious killers but, at the same time, they’re also kinda cute and adorable in a chupacabra kind of way.

Anyway, Apolo Ohno and a bunch of his friends go to Tasmania. Apolo jumps off of a cliff, has some trouble with his parachute, and ends up plunging into a hidden cave and getting impaled on the world’s biggest stalagmite.  Apolo hangs around for a bit, squirming like a bug and groaning despite the fact that he’s got a gigantic hole in chest.  Seriously, Apolo must be invincible.  Alas, his blood gets the attention of the Tasmanian devils and, in perhaps the defining scene of 2013, Apolo Ohno is literally ripped into little pieces on-screen.

There is a little bit more that happens in the film.  Apolo’s friends end up running into a park ranger played by Danica McKellar and they soon all find themselves being stalked through the wilderness by the Tasmanian devils.  However, for me, the film was pretty much about Apolo Ohno getting literally ripped into little pieces on-screen.

What Worked?

OH MY GOD!  Apolo Ohno was literally ripped into little pieces on-screen!  This led to me framing the term “Ohnotastic” as a way to refer to any spectacular death in a SyFy film.  This eventually led to the creation of the Ohno Scale, which from now on, will be used to judge the effectiveness of SyFy carnage.  Tasmanian Devils will now forever be one of the pivotal films in the history of the Snarkalecs.

(Hopefully, the next two-headed shark film from the Asylum will feature a Michael Phelps cameo.)

Beyond that, Tasmanian Devils was actually a pretty good film.  It was the epitome of a fun movie to watch with friends and director Zach Lipovsky actually managed to generate some genuine suspense.  Even better, both Lipovsky and Danica McKellar dropped by twitter and interacted with the people commenting on the film.  It’s always really nice whenever filmmakers do this.

On a personal note, I enjoyed Tasmanian Devils because it was filmed in Canada, a country that I am strangely obsessed with.  As for the male snarkalecs, they seemed to largely enjoy Tasmanian Devils because of the low-cut top that Danica McKellar’s park ranger was wearing.

What Did Not Work?

It all worked.  Life is too short to be critical of a film called Tasmanian Devils.

“OH MY GOD!  Just like me!” Moments

Insert your own low-cut top/heaving boobs comment here.

Lessons Learned

Apolo Ohno is not invincible.

4 responses to “What Lisa and the Snarkalecs Watched Last Night #66: Tasmanian Devils (dir by Zach Lipovsky)

  1. I absolutely love Tasmania.

    I’ll say it now: you can have Paris, Milan, New York, Tokyo, London, Zurich…

    …because WE have Hobart.

    Where is Hobart? It’s the capital of Tasmania. Errol Flynn was born there.


    Enough said.

    I once met an old-time film critic who theorised that the Warner Brothers cartoon character was inpsired by Errol Flynn, because prior to Flynn striking it big in Hollywood, most people would have had no idea about Tasmania. He was the actor who made Tasmania famous.

    I was just thinking to myself the other day, Tasmania is probably visited by more foreigners than it is mainland Australians. Even here in Melbourne, a lot of folks have never been to Tasmania, despite the fact that it’s only an hour on the plane, or you can go by sea and it’ll only take you half a day. Foreigners who are smart visit Tasmania. Foreigners who come all the way around the world and leave Tassie off their itenary have wasted their trip. It’s akin to those visitors to Melbourne who don’t check out the Astor Theatre.

    I fondly recall a visit with a tour group to a sanctuary down in south eastern Tasmania. There was a blonde park ranger there who made Danica McKellar look downright homely. Speaking of Winnie Cooper, she must be slumming to appear in such a film. Seriously, “Tasmanian Devils”? Is this why she went to college? BWAHAHAHAHAHAAAAH! From strength to strength, Danica! She even gets to spout the usual drivel about the Aborigines. Never ever heard that stuff she said about them, by the way.

    (And before anybody says anything, yes, I do realise that it’s not meant to be taken seriously! At least Danica is honest about the film on her website, but still—gigantic Tasmanian devils?)

    In reality, Tasmanian devils are nowhere nearly as dangerous as they are portrayed in the film (apparently the ones in the film are jumbo-sized). You wouldn’t want one to bite you, but you could say the same about a koala. They’re basically somewhere between a dog and a wombat. Sadly, the Tasmanian devil is an endangered species. I wouldn’t mind seeing this movie at least once to see how badly Tasmania is misrepresented.

    Does the film contain any bad Australian accents?

    You know, if you released this film theatrically in Australia, it would draw pretty good box office!


  2. Pingback: What Lisa and The Snarkalecs Watched Last Night #67: Abominable Snowman (dir by Marko Makilaasko) | Through the Shattered Lens

  3. I finally saw this last night – and since I missed the opportunity on the original live tweet, I’ll repeat my initial impression here:
    “is this The Wonderbra Years?”



  4. Pingback: 2013 In Review: The Best of SyFy | Through the Shattered Lens

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