Horror Book Review: Haunted by R.L. Stine


First published in 1990, Haunted tells the story of Melissa, a teenager who would seem to have the perfect life.

No only does she come from a wealthy family and live in a nice, big house that is located right in the middle of Fear Street but Melissa is also a popular student at Shadyside High and she has a boyfriend named Buddy.  Plus, she’s just celebrated her birthday and, as a present, she got a brand new car!  The only thing that Melissa really has to worry about is the possibility of her house being broken into by the elusive Fear Street Prowler and the fact that a bitter ghost named Paul keeps materializing in front of her and claiming that she killed him and he’s come back from the dead to get revenge.  Paul is not only a revenge-seeking ghost but he also taunts Melissa for being rich.  Perhaps the only thing worse than being haunted is by being haunted by a ghost from the lower classes.  I mean, seriously, I don’t even want to think about it….

(Usual disclaimer: I do NOT believe in ghosts.)

Melissa is not only annoyed by Paul’s bad manners but also by the fact that he claims that she killed him when she has absolutely no memory of who he is.  In fact, when she does some simple research to see if anyone recently killed Paul, she discovers that no one named Paul has been murdered recently.  Paul himself admits that his memory is a little bit fuzzy, as well.  Accusing someone of murdering you when you’re really not sure isn’t a cool thing to do, Paul.  Stupid ghost.

Then, one night, Melissa sees Paul hanging out with his other less-than-wealthy friends.  Only, this Paul is alive and he’s even more of a jerk than his ghost!  Melissa realizes that Paul’s ghost is from the future and  that therefore, Paul has not died yet but will and apparently, she’s going to be the one responsible!  But how can that be when Ghost Paul is turning out to be not that bad and actually kind of sweet?

(Myself, I’m more concerned with how Living Paul and Ghost Paul both existing at the same time seems like one of those things that would cause the universe to split open or something.  I mean, it just doesn’t seem right.)

This is one of R.L. Stine’s stranger books.  The plot doesn’t really make much sense but you have to kind of admire the fact that Stine just went with it and didn’t even bother to try to make any of it seem plausible.  Sometimes, it’s best just to embrace the silliness of it all and that’s what Stine does here.  The book’s attempts to deal with class differences were fairly shallow but then again, when you’re a teenager, you’re always at you’re most shallow when talking about who is rich and who is poor so, on that level, Stine did a good job writing for his target audience.  The important thing is that Melissa was a relatable and sympathetic character and she definitely deserved a less petulant ghost.

10 Of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Songs of 2013


Continuing my series on the best of 2013, here are ten of my favorite songs from 2013. Now, I’m not necessarily saying that these were the best songs of 2013. Some of them aren’t. But these are ten songs that, in the future, will define 2013 for me personally. Again, these are my picks and my picks only. So, if you think my taste in music sucks (and, admittedly, quite a few people do), direct your scorn at me and not at anyone else who writes for the Shattered Lens.

I’ve occasionally been asked what my criteria for a good song us. Honestly, the main things I look for in a song is 1) can I dance to it, 2) can I write to it, and 3) can I get all into singing it while I’m stuck in traffic or in the shower?

Anyway, at the risk of revealing just how much of a dork I truly am, here are ten of my favorite songs of 2013.

10) A Low and Swelling Sound Gradually Swelling (composed by Shane Carruth)

This atmospheric instrumental piece comes from the soundtrack of the best film of 2013, Upstream Color.  This is great writing music.

9) Giorgio By Moroder (performed by Daft Punk and Giorgio Moroder)

From Random Access Memories.

8) Saturday (performed by Rebecca Black and Dave Days)

I make no apologies.  Much like Friday, this is a fun song to sing when you’re driving to and from work.  Plus, I think the video’s clever.

7) Brave (performed by Sara Bareilles)

I have to admit that I loved this song more before it started showing up in Nokia Lumia commercials.

6) Feel This Moment (performed by Pitbull, feat. Christina Aguilera)

5) Haunted (performed by ROB)

This is from the Maniac soundtrack.  Much like the Carruth song, this is great writing music.

4) Work Bitch (performed by Britney Spears)

Not a day goes by that I don’t find an excuse to say, “You gotta work, bitch.”

3) A Little Party Never Killed Nobody (All We Got) (performed by Fergie, feat. Q-Tip and Goon Rock)

From The Great Gatsby soundtrack.

2) Just Give Me A Reason (performed by Pink and Nate Ruess)

1) Lose Yourself to Dance (performed by Daft Punk and Pharrell Williams)

What else needs to be said?

Finally, here are two honorable mentions.  These are two songs that helped define 2013 for me but, for various reasons, could not be included in my top ten.

First off, Alison Gold’s Chinese Food is technically a terrible song but it’s so terrible that it becomes oddly fascinating.  Thanks to the presence of Patrice Wilson, the video is probably one of the most unintentionally creepy music videos ever made.

(I should admit that I happen to love Chinese food myself and therefore, this song is one that I’ve sung a lot over the past few years.)

The second honorable mention is a far better song than Chinese Food: Icona Pop’s I Love It.  I Love It was released in 2012 but it’s the song that I listened to nonstop last year..  So, even if it was released a year earlier, I Love It is still my favorite song of 2013.

Tomorrow, I will continue my look back at 2013 with 10 good things that I saw on television last year.

Other Entries In TSL’s Look Back At 2013:

  1. Lisa Marie’s 16 Worst Films of 2013
  2. Necromoonyeti’s Top 10 Metal Albums of 2013
  3. Things That Dork Geekus Dug In 2013
  4. Lisa Marie’s Best of 2o13 SyFy