Dan O’Herlihy | Through the Shattered Lens

I recently discovered that I have about 66 movies recorded on my DVR. A few of these, like Bend it Like Beckham and Thirteen, are films that I always make it a point to watch whenever they show up on television. But the majority of them are movies that I just happened to spot while going through the guide and I thought they looked intriguing. These are movies that I have not been in any hurry to watch but, at the same time, I’m still glad to know that they’re waiting for me whenever I do feel like watching them.

Well, that time has come. In the month of February, TCM is going to be showing a lot of old Oscar nominees which means that I need to make some space on the DVR. For the past week, I’ve been going through all of my recorded films and watching them. While many of them turned out to be rather forgettable, I’ve also come across quite a few that, regardless of quality, made me happy I had taken the time to set them to be recorded.

Case in point: The Big Cube.

What makes The Big Cube such a memorable film?

Four words: Lana. Turner. On. Acid.

The Big Cube was first released in 1969, a fact that’s obvious during every minute of the film. Lana Turner plays Adriana Roman, a famous stage actress who, following the final performance of a hilariously (and unintentionally) bad play, announces that she is retiring from the theatre so that she might marry the fabulously wealthy Charles Winthrop (Dan O’Herlihy).

Charles has a daughter, a spoiled brat named — wait for it — Lisa (Karin Mossberg). Interestingly enough, despite the fact that Charles speaks with a pronounced Irish accent, Lisa speaks with a thick Swedish accent that makes the majority of her dialogue almost impossible to understand. (Adding to the film’s general strangeness is that all of Mossberg’s dialogue is dubbed, which makes you wonder why the film’s producers didn’t, at the very least, hire a voice-over actress who could have at least sounded somewhat believable as Charles’s daughter.) Lisa is resentful of Adriana, viewing her as competition for both her father’s affection and his money.

Since this movie was made in 1969, Lisa also spends all of her time hanging out with hippies who, in this film, are presented as being the equivalent of pure evil. They hang out at a “hip” nightclub known as Le Dream where they spend their time secretly slipping sugar cubes laced with LSD into the drinks of strangers. Or, as one random hippy puts it, “I’m going to cube that mother!”

The source of all of this LSD is Johnny (George Chakiris), a medical student who ends up dating Lisa and conspiring to drive her stepmother insane. Each night, they secretly slip Adriana LSD, which leads to Lana Turner bugging out her eyes while multi-colored spiral graphs appear on the walls around her. (And again, we’re reminded that this film was made in 1969, when all you needed to do to let the audience know someone was having a bad trip was to make excessive use of a zoom lens and color filters.)

Eventually, all of this leads to Adriana being struck with amnesia. How can her mind be fixed? Could the solution possibly be for Adriana’s playwright friend (Richard Egan) to write a play that reveals the conspiracy against Adriana and then to cast Adriana in the lead role? And is it possible that along with restoring Adriana’s mind, this play will also allow her to return to the stage and discover that Egan is secretly in love with her?

The Big Cube deserves to be seen just because it’s such a weird and over-the-top film but, beyond that, it’s fascinating as a piece of history. In 1969, mainstream Hollywood filmmakers were still struggling to figure out how to deal with the counterculture and, even more importantly, how to continue to appeal to young filmgoers who no longer had much in common with the establishment. The end result were a collection of films that either tried desperately and earnestly to prove that, despite all appearances to contrary, the Hollywood studios really did understand and sympathize with the disaffected youth of America or films like The Big Cube in which old school movie stars like Lana Turner were menaced by long-haired men and amoral girl in miniskirts.

Perhaps not surprisingly, the evil hippy films are a lot more fun than the good hippy films and, as far as evil hippy films are concerned, The Big Cube is one of the more entertaining, even if most of the film’s pleasures are unintentional. Not only do you get to watch some of the most evil hippies in history but you also get the once-in-a-lifetime experience of seeing Lana Turner on acid!

Seriously, what better way is there to spend 90 minutes?

(Even better, by watching The Big Cube, I could finally delete it from DVR and make some room for the next episode of Downton Abbey….)

The Last Starfighter was a nice little sci-fi action movie which was revolutionary when it was released due to it’s use of an early version of CGI-effects. For 1984, the special-effects was quite new and showed just what was possible in the years to come.

The film itself was a fun and simple sci-fi actioner which owes a lot to the arcade shooters which were popular during the 80’s. Even the main plotline of the film was pretty much about a video game sent by a benevolent space-faring Rylan Star League looking to find a few good Starfighters to save their federation from the danger that was Zur and the Ko-Dan Armada. Lance Guest plays Alex Rogan whose only past-time at the trailer-park, where he lives with his mother and younger brother, is his girlfriend Maggie Gordon (played by 80’s genre favorite Catherine Mary Stewart) and constantly playing a video game called The Last Starfighter. Alex’s expert skills in beating the game brings about a new wrinkle in his hum-drum life which seems to be going nowhere. A seeming con-man of a salesman by the name of Centauri (played with gusto and energy by Robert Preston) comes out of nowhere and gives him an offer and opportunity that is out of this world.

The rest of the film brings about Alex’s reluctance to join the Star League as a Starfighter and pilot of the Gunstar fighter. He thinks it’s all a mistake and that he wasn’t signing up for some sort of intergalactic war that may just kill him. Like most action movies Alex will have an epiphany of what his role and destiny must be and, with some reluctance, finally takes the challenge by the controls and goes off to fight Zur and the Ko-Dan Armada with his lone Gunstar and his trusty navigator and all-around lizardman mentor, Grigg (played with equal parts seriousness and fun by Dan O’Herlihy).

For those like me who grew up during the 80’s and enjoyed watching these simple but fun sci-fi films The Last Starfighter was quite the blast from the past which still delights and entertains despite the corny dialogue and cheesy effects. The CGI-effects of the Gunstar and the Ko-Dan Armada looks dated but I still can’t take my eyes off the screen whenever these early looking CG effects come on. The acting is pretty standard B-movie quality with everyone seeming to have fun with the premise and giving it their all. There’s nothing to write the Academy about but in the end the performances do just enough to make the audience like the characters.

The Last Starfighter was quite the underrated scifi action film which should’ve done better than it did when it first came out. It’s since gained a cult following on video and always a welcome sight whenever it comes on cable. The film might seem dated compared to the super advanced CGI-effects laden blockbusters we have now but it still entertains the people who grew up watching it as kids and who have grown up since.