This is fun!!! Technically, this short film does not have an actual story, BUT it is still a well done and fun short film. But Case, you’re so hard on everyone and this year you’re being so lenient! Fair critique, but I argue that this is within the parody genre and is exempt from my usual rules. Attack of the Killer Tomatoes was one of the first films to do a feature length send up of many different movies and this short is in that vibe.
They go through the tropes: they stop at an abandoned cabin and say – F THAT!, a cop who WAITS for backup, and a boy who finds the Hellraiser puzzle and just plays with his iPhone instead and then does something hilarious to the box. If you want a quick laugh when you’re in line or anything other time you have about 3 minutes to kill, it is great choice. Life can be challenging and good laugh is better than a good cry.
A girl and her gay friend are watching cheesy scary movies together. He reminded me of my sister’s gay best friend in college. It’ll be difficult for me to hate this because of pleasant nostalgia; so again, my fingers are crossed.
They get a threatening phone call and run panicked through the house. They hide in the bathroom tub and begin confessing the worst things that they did to each other. Then, it turns out they were not being stalked. What worked? I liked the camera work. The plot was good and it had a clear storyline and resolution. It’s not the greatest short that I have ever seen, but it was entertaining. What didn’t work? I didn’t get the costume change at the end, but it was … fine. See it below!
This film was not in IMDB. I could not find the actresses or director on imdb. Unless it’s just a series of slurs, I’m going to pretty lenient and hopeful. The filmmaker has no subscribers and is doing this for the love of the art. My fingers are crossed! A single mom and her friend are unlucky in love and have a budding romance. During their mundane conversation, the mother’s daughter is screaming like a demon. There are a number of signs of evil presence. Since there was not a conclusion, I believe that this short was a pitch for funding for a feature length film. When Hulu makes a faux short film, it’s very annoying, but Stacey Ellis is trying hard to get her art off of the ground and I wish her the best. Yes, I’ve gone soft.
We are NOT powerless! We don’t have to let Alex Magana films happen. Alex Magana films being created is not a requirement of life, unless we permit it! I know that many of you think that he is inevitable like Thanos or getting herpes, BUT it is not! Thanos, herpes, and Alex Magana films don’t have to be part of your life!
Speaking of herpes, we need to go into a deeper dive of our cultural heroes sleeping with Aliens! Whatever they evolved from, it wasn’t on Earth!
You’re gonna give all COVID 1000! They probably have sapient cold sores! Cut it out! The green alien especially because just wait until the Jolly Green Giant gets home! Yes, I did hold myself back from the obvious she is a
Ho Ho Ho
Yes, this was a tangent, but it delayed my review and that is a good thing. The story is very simple a woman does her laundry, the laundry alarm buzzes, and…..nothing just a high pitched boyfriend. The boyfriend investigates the laundry and is eaten by a monster hiding the dryer. She also investigates and the monster is her laundry. I do not understand the monster’s lifecycle or why this movie had to be. We could stop Alex Magana! Think on this, if 100 guys can stop a gorilla, 20 guys could stop Alex! If you want to see something terrible, see below.
It is fun to review a Chris McInroy short film. They are great horror comedy with copious gore. The actors are obviously friends of his that know how to deliver a joke. Chris also knows how to use a brief silence for a bigger laugh. He’s the Anti-Alex Magana. If you watch more than two Alex Magana films in one sitting, you wonder if humankind should really keep going. Whereas, these are a pleasure to watch and review. Side note the amount of blood and gore are Sam Raimi levels.
Two bros are meeting a fellow bro for kickball, but their comrade has joined a satanic cult. Here’s the twist, all of the cultist are terrible at their job. What is refreshing is that there are no Mary Sues or Mike Sues- EVERYONE in this cult is a moron! Black, white, asian, libertarian, or vegetarian ALL are equally stupid and it is hilarious! There is a kickball decapitation that is priceless! I highly recommend this short!
This is an example of a perfect short film! Sometimes life is just awful and you find that Hell has sub-basements. I am currently in the next to last sub-basement; yes, it really is that bad. At times like that, Richard Morgan, the author of Altered Carbon wrote “You take what’s offered….sometimes you just need to get to the next screen.” Working with Jigsaw was one of those moments for me. It was funny enough to make my brain take a brief break and allow me to laugh. Trust me, if a film is funny enough to make me laugh at this time in my life, you might literally pee your pants or poo or pee/poo them. What I am trying say is that you should wear your peeing yourself pants while watching this and then shower- Don’t be gross!
Thanks Al
The plot is right in the title and you get what you were promised. You know you have something special when the writer and director know that 3 minutes and 43 seconds is actually longer that you think. Why is that important? It is critical to have the time awareness because it frees the short film director to use silence to set up a reaction. In this film, the silences set up the punchlines, but it a straight horror short it allows for suspense, payoff, and even to have a moment to care about the characters. Most of the shorts I watch are either pitches in disguise or worse they don’t use their time wisely to make you care that the characters are in peril.
Working with Jigsaw pulls together the concept of a malevolent force being awful at work. Jigsaw is constantly interfering with people’s work to make them play his non-lethal but horribly annoying games. The HR scene at the end is film gold!
I really can’t say enough nice things about this short. Both writers got jobs working for Jimmy Kimmel after this short, which fills with rare joy! I hope they continue to make short films and feature length comedies- they are truly gifted artists!
You’re not that bad because Alex Magana makes films. He’s like how Alabama can look down on Mississippi. It has been a Horrorthon tradition that I review his “art”, but it is difficult. 1 Million people watched this short, which tells me that WE NEED A DRAFT! Being an Alex Magana fan is like being proud of your artisanal meth pipe or bragging about doing a TED talk about the THIRD time you got gonorrhea. I do have to admit that his film does have beginning middle and an end; so, it is a short film. Someone has to review it and who else would do this to themselves, but me????
The Teacher begins with two teens warning each other that if they don’t finish their homework, The Teacher will kill them. One of them does not finish her homework; so, she gets killed by the eponymous Teacher. I do have to admit that for Alex this is good because unlike the Smiling Woman crapfest, The Teacher has rules and a Strumplepeter message. Therefore, it does have some literary ancestry. It is still awful, but not as awful as what he usually does to us. It’s like a jab to the eyes rather than his usual Mortal Kombat finishing move to the eyes. Enjoy…I guess.
Andy Griffith’s “What It Was, Was Football” is a classic, comic monologue about a naive country preacher who stumbles upon a football game and tries to make sense of something he’s never seen before. Needless to say, it’s hilarious, and it highlights just what a great comedian Griffith is. In honor of what would have been Andy Griffith’s 99th birthday, I gave it a listen, and now I share it with you. Enjoy!
Chow Yun-Fat is one of the most charismatic men on earth. I’ve always enjoyed his performance in ANNA AND THE KING (1999) with Jodie Foster. He’s wonderful in this big budget American film, and he doesn’t even have to fire two guns! I know several women here in Arkansas who don’t know the first thing about Hong Kong movies, but they still love Chow based on this one film. On a side note, ANNA AND THE KING made over $113 Million at the worldwide box office, which means quite a few people in this world appreciate a more romantic Chow.
Enjoy this scene where the King of Siam surprises Foster’s English schoolteacher, and breaks all kinds of cultural norms, when he asks her to dance. It’s quite a charmer.
So we meet again….Alex … Magana. Now look, I assume that most of my readers are good, kind, and decent, but what if you’re not?! I mean what if you’re not that great or you did one REALLY bad thing that you feel guilty about. I’m not saying putting your neighbor in a woodchipper kind of thing, but let’s just include the lessor felonies. If you just need that self-flagellation, my dear ne’er-do-well compadre, this film and Alex Magana is for you.
Alex Magana assaults the senses and art herself. In fact, from the hackneyed plots to the p*rn quality acting, he is the Ed Wood of the digital age! If you don’t believe me, check out the “Smiling Woman”… SERIES…yes, it’s a series! I refuse to call it a franchise! I won’t do it! Luckily, your misery is brief because as terrible as Alex Magana’s films are – he can’t write stories longer than 4 minutes.
“Don’t Lie” shows an influencer, who I think seems a little old for the gig; however, we must let all things slide with Alex. Typically, Alex just films out of his apartment and the hall in his apartment building. The lead actress could be homeless or just live near the building; so, she could be young, but life on the street is hard. In fact, all of the actors could be homeless and this brief filming was their only exposure to …. home. *Sheds Tear*
The story continues where her boyfriend stages her murder to gain additional subscribers, which doesn’t make sense because why subscribe to the deceased? But, Whatever. A psycho then teaches her and her boyfriend a lesson about … honesty… with a knife. Apparently, neither she nor her boyfriend understand how their legs can make them move around and even away from things or people.
If we look at “Don’t Lie” like an industrial film, like “The Importance of Good Manners”, “Why you should drive safely”, and “Don’t ever put that in your Bu..” anyway. My point is that maybe “Don’t Lie” is salvageable as a lesson film. The lesson is this: Don’t let Alex Magana have any recording devices! EVER! He’s got to be stopped! He’s really prolific! How is paying for all this very very low budget dreck?!
Through the Shattered Lens 