Today we celebrate Ed Wood’s 100th birthday with his sequel to Bride of the Monsters. In Night of the Ghouls, con man Dr. Alcula (Kenne Duncan) moves into Bela Lugosi’s old mansion and pretends to talk to the dead. What Alcula doesn’t realize is that the house is actually haunted (by Tor Johnson’s Lobo, among others) and real ghosts don’t appreciate pretend ghosts.
What can you say about a film like of Night of the Ghouls? It’s an Ed Wood film, with all that suggests. However, how can you resist a film that starts with Criswell sitting up in his coffin and providing commentary?
The role of Dr. Alcula was originally written for Bela Lugosi. After Lugosi’s death, veteran actor and longtime Wood friend Kenne Duncan got the role instead. Also of note, Wood appears twice in this film. Not only does his picture appear on a wanted poster in the police station but Wood also plays one of the ghouls.
When this 2021 film started, I noticed that the only immediately familiar name in the opening credits was Corbin Bernsen, who was the third-billed member of the cast. Bernsen’s presence in the film did not surprise me. Bernsen has appeared in several faith-based films and he’s even directed a few.
What did surprise me was just how briefly Bernsen’s appearance actually waas. It’s a blink-and-you’ll miss it appearance and, unless I somehow missed it, I don’t think he actually has a line of dialogue in the film. He plays the uncle of one of the film’s main characters. He’s an archeologist and, whenever he finds any ancient glass at the site of any of his digs, he sends it to his nephew. The nephew eventually decides to put all that glass to good use by taping it all together and using it as the frames for his previously frameless glasses. Suddenly, whenever he puts on the glasses, he can see the past!
That’s good because one of his professors has felt guilty ever since his grandson was kidnapped. So now, he can just put on the glasses and see who did the abducting. Yay! However, another professor — a physicist — wants the glasses for himself so he drugs our hero and steals the glasses. Luckily, everything works out in the end. Bad professor goes to jail. Good professor stops drinking and is reunited with his family. And the guy with the glasses gets a recording contract in Nashville.
I guess the glasses are meant to represent faith. And the bad scientist is meant to represent everyone who says that science is more important than faith. I’m not sure that glasses that allow you to see into the past is the best way sell the idea of faith. I mean, if you’re so inclined, I guess you could spend as much time as you want praying for a pair of magic glasses that will allow you to see into the past but, at some point, you’re going to have to admit that there’s no such thing as magic glasses, no matter how much you want to believe in them. In this case, the scientist laughing at you would be proven right.
I had another thought while watching this film. A good sound mix is really important. If you want people to get anything out of your movie, it’s important that they be able to hear what your characters are saying. It’s important that the characters actually sound like they’re all in the same room as opposed to just standing in a booth and reading their lines off a piece of paper. The sound was all over the place. Sometimes, I had to strain to hear everything. Sometimes, I winced because the movie was too loud. Considering how talky this film is and how often the action segues into flashback, this movie needed a much cleaner sound to it. There’s more to making a good film than focusing the image, though this film struggled with that as well.
Anyway, the most interesting thing about this film is Corbin Bernsen showing up for 2 minutes and not saying anything. Has Bernsen become the poor man’s Eric Roberts?
After spending years in a mental hospital for murdering his abusive parents, Tom Dreyer (Gary Busey) is released and told to find somewhere else to live. He ends up secretly living in the crawl space of the new home Julie (Mimi Rogers) and Phil Dreyer (Michael McKean). Obsessed with Julie, he’ll do anything to be with her, including breaking up her marriage to Phil and killing anyone who comes to close to discovering him in the crawlspace, whether it’s the family dog, an exterminator, or Julie’s best friend.
Due to the distributor having financial issues, Hider In The House never got a theatrical release but it used to show up on HBO frequently in the late 80s and 90s. I can also remember that our local video store had the film’s poster hanging on the wall near the cash register, creating the impression that Gary Busy was not only staring at Mimi Rogers but also judging whatever you decided to rent for the weekend. Hider In The House was very popular amongst those of us who had a crush on Mimi Rogers, which was basically every guy on the planet back in the day.
It’s not a bad movie, even if it is predictable. Both Mimi Rogers and a pre-motorcycle accident Gary Busey give good performance and it’s interesting to see Michael McKean playing a dramatic role for once. The main problem with the movie is that it’s impossible to believe that big and hulking Busey could possibly live in someone’s attic and move around between the walls without everyone immediately noticing. A Clydesdale would have more luck going unnoticed than Gary Busey.
Shortly after he completed filming on Hider In The House, Gary Busey was in a motorcycle accident that nearly killed him. He fractured his skull and suffered permanent brain damage. It’s always interesting to compare the Gary Busey of the 70s and 80s with the Gary Busey of today. People are so used to the Busey who yells and speaks in riddles that it’s easy to forget that he was once a very good actor, even when he was appearing in something like Hider In The House.
Happy Horrorthon, I suppose. Why am I hedging? I’m hedging because I’m reviewing an Alex Magana short. Yes, I’m watching this on purpose.
Ring camera begins with a woman in an apartment, I think the apartment is actually Alex’s residence.
At least, I hope it’s Alex’s apartment because it’s kind of a dump and I don’t think he should live in a very nice place. I’m not saying his apartment should be infested with Camel Spiders like this one:
Or 1,000 Camel Spiders that are like this breed:
This one looks feisty. I don’t want his apartment to have Camel Spiders like this one above because he makes terrible terrible art, but what about Cicadas…Cicadae? Anyway, they are pretty gross. They don’t have teeth, but they’re annoying and terrible like his films. So, Cicadae…go forth and meet your new roomie!
Honestly Cicadae, he’ll probably cast you. How are you with terrible acting?
Back to my misery, the lady has a “Unfamiliar Face” on her ring camera. I wonder if he films these with his iPhone. The creeper approaches her apartment and starts knocking. She opens the door and it’s a delivery guy. Ma’am, I’m not judging too hard, but that’s a large bag of food for one person. Look:
This is too much food. You should not eat your weight in food. Ma’am, the bag is half your size. Did you get fired? Is Alex making you do a 3 film deal? You can’t fill the pain Alex has created with Door Dash! Then, she looks around and she gets killed by the evil ghost. I know that watching this short will make you sad, but remember- maybe you’re not that good? I mean, how many good things have you actually done today? Maybe, you deserve this film more than you know? Maybe, this film will be like a Scared Straight and put you on a better path? Maybe, you just need the pain that this film provides- you weirdo! In any case, this film is for you. You know what you did!
Since tomorrow will be the great man’s birthday, it seems appropriate that today’s horror film on the lens is Edward D. Wood’s 1955 epic, Bride of the Monster.
(Much like Plan 9 From Outer Space, around here, it is a tradition to watch Bride of the Monster in October.)
The film itself doesn’t feature a bride but it does feature a monster, a giant octopus who guards the mansion of the mysterious Dr. Vornoff (Bela Lugosi). Vornoff and his hulking henchman Lobo (Tor Johnson) have been kidnapping men and using nuclear power to try to create a race of super soldiers. Or something like that. The plot has a make-it-up-as-you-go-along feel to it. That’s actually a huge part of the film’s appeal.
Bride of the Monster is regularly described as being one of the worst films ever made but I think that’s rather unfair. Appearing in his last speaking role, Lugosi actually gives a pretty good performance, bringing a wounded dignity to the role of Vornoff. If judged solely against other movies directed by Ed Wood, this is actually one of the best films ever made.
Having been recently diagnosed with serious heart problems and having also recently lost his wife in a car accident, James Bragg (Gary T. Smith) collapses when he’s informed that he has been fired from his job. When he opens his eyes, he discovers that his office is on fire. A man in a suit (Clay Butler) claims to be an agent with the Department of Homeland Security and he explains that the building has been bombed.
“By who?” James asks.
“Al Qaeda. Boko Haram. Mexican drug cartels,” the man replies.
James asks for the man for his name. The man smiles and says that must people call him Bub.
Bub leads James through the burning building, explaining that he’s taking James to safety. However, as the flames grow higher, James hears a voice saying, “Don’t follow him.” Bub says that the voice is just a ploy of the terrorists but James isn’t quite so sure….
As soon as I tell you that 2023’s The Friend is faith-based film, you’ll probably be able to guess where this story is going. Will James follow Bub onto the elevator going down or will he listen to the voice telling him not to follow. Will James remember that Bub is a nickname for Beezlebub, one of the more fearsome of the demons that are said to populate Hell? Will James make peace with the death of his wife and find the strength to continue? Who will James’s new friend be? Will it be Bub or will it be the older man who always seems to be showing up in the background?
Again, you can probably guess where all this is heading but The Friend is still a well-made and surprisingly well-acted meditation on life, death, and faith and, with the exception of two scenes, it’s a film that does a good job of avoiding the preachiness that one expects to find in films like this. Along with co-directing and co-writing the script, Gary T. Smith starts in the film and he gives a good performance as a man overwhelmed by both his mortality and the loss of the person who gave his life meaning. Smith does a good job of showing how it’s the little things that hurt us the most when we’re missing someone. Even an act of kindness, like a co-worker expressing sincere sympathy, can cause the pain of a recent loss to flare up. Of course, for many viewers, the film will work because it makes Bub a government agent. The implication, whether deliberate or not, is that an authoritarian like Bub is right at home working as a federal agent and that he has no problem using James’s understandable fear of a terrorist attack as a way to convince James to give up everything that was previously important to him. Obviously, I don’t know that the filmmaker had any sort of political statement in mind when they made Bub an agent of Homeland Security but it does certainly provide an interesting subtext to the film.
Actually, I’m a bit surprised that Bub didn’t apply for a job with TSA. Imagine the pain and misery he could spread there!
“You know what they say, Sam! Everyone wants a piece of a medical student.”
“That’s sick, Punk Rock Dan.”
So say two radio hosts towards the end of the 1986 film, Evil Laugh.
Evil Laugh is a slasher film that was directed by Dominick Brascia, the actor who appeared as Joey, the most annoying character ever, in Friday the 13th Part V. Joey was the fat kid who got on everyone’s nerves by offering them a chocolate bar. Eventually, he made the mistake of approach axe-crazy Vic while Vic was holding an actual axe. “You know I’ve never chopped wood before but it looks like fun,” Joey said. “LEAVE ME ALONE!” Vic shouted. “Okay, Vic …. but I think you’re way out of line.” Vic responded by burying his axe in Joey’s back and I imagine audiences cheered. Seriously, Joey was that annoying.
Evil Laugh actually contains some references to Friday the 13th. One of the potential victims, a medical student named Barney (Jerold Pearson) is a horror movie buff who points out that the reason that Jason keeps coming back to Camp Crystal Lake is because everyone keeps having sex. Unfortunately, none of his friends listen to him.
Barney is one of a group of med students who are spending the weekend at an abandoned orphanage. Years ago, an employee named Martin was falsely accused by the orphans of abusing them. Martin’s father committed suicide from the shame and Martin went on a killing rampage before setting the place on fire. (And yet, the building still stands without so much as a burn mark.) A doctor has decided to reopen the orphanage and, in the tradition of Steve Christy and the counselors he got killed at Crystal Lake, he has recruited a bunch of med students to help him get the place ready to go. The doctor has already been killed by the time the med students arrives but they get to work anyway.
The cool thing about this movie is that there’s a cleaning montage. Everyone really gets into cleaning. I could relate to that. Another cool thing about this movie is that there are a few moments when it reveals itself to have a sense of humor. Barney is a horror fan and is constantly pointing out that everything that is happening is like something that would happen in a slasher film. Barney’s friends are dismissive of him and, as a result, things don’t go well for them. The deaths are all memorable. As well, the film’s ending worked surprisingly well. Finally, the last cool thing about this movie is that, towards the end, one character got to wear the really pretty black kimono. As soon as the movie ended, I decided to order myself a new black kimono.
That said, I don’t want to overpraise Evil Laugh. It had its moments and I think it can be argued that it had more “good moments” than the average low-budget, independently-made 80s slasher film. At the same time, some of the acting truly is unfortunate and it does seem to take a while for the film to really achieve any sort of narrative momentum. For every scene that works, there’s another one that’s just downright boring. Evil Laugh is not an overlooked classic but, again, it has its moments.
In 1986’s Dreamaniac, Adam (Thomas Bern) is a total dork who lives with his much more popular sister, Pat (Ashlyn Gere). Adam aspires to be a heavy metal superstar and he is very much interested in the occult. He’s been having dreams about being visited by a sultry and mysterious woman named Lily (Sylvia Summers). When he performs a Satanic ritual to summon her for real, Lily offers him anything that he wants. Instead of asking her to turn him into the world’s greatest guitarist or something smart like that, Adam asks to be irresistible to women.
Seriously, Adam, if you were the world’s greatest guitarist, you would be getting laid all the time whether you were irresistible or not. The ugliest guy in the world is still be sexy if he can play guitar. Take a look at the Rolling Stones and its long history of ugly guitar players who all looked good as long as they were playing. Take a look at …. oh, I don’t know. I’m tired and I’m just trying to pad out this review because there’s not much to be said about this movie. Let’s move on.
Anyway, Adam gets his wish but he also has to kill the women so that Lily can take their soul and …. eh, that’s stupid. Like Adam, why would you agree to such a counter-productive agreement? Adam was so desperate to get a girlfriend that he apparently didn’t consider that none of them would really live long enough for him to have a real relationship with them. What an idiot.
After Adam sells his soul or whatever it is that he’s supposed to be doing with Lily, Pat throws a party at the house and a bunch of shallow sorority girls and fraternity boys come over and everyone dies one-by-one, usually right after having sex. No one really notices that everyone at the party is dying but then again, no one in this movie really seems to like anyone else so maybe they just don’t care.
Dreamaniac kind of ticked me off, largely because the title should have been Dream Maniac instead of Dreamaniac. I guess I would have let them even get away with something like Dreammaniac. But Dreamaniac, with only one m, just doesn’t make sense and looking at the word makes my multi-colored eyes tear up. This may sound like a petty complaint but there’s honestly not much to be said about Dreamaniac. It’s one of those low-budget, shot on video horror films where the lighting is often so dark and the soundtrack so muddy that you’re never really sure what’s happening on-screen. I dare anyone to watch this film and seriously try to tell one character a part from another. I had no idea who half the characters were and quite frankly, I didn’t care. This was one of David DeCoteau’s earlier films and it has none of the subversiveness that distinguished DeCoteau’s better efforts. (Considering the harsh tone of this review, I feel like I should point out that DeCoteau has directed some truly entertaining movies. Dreamaniac is certainly not the film that should be used to judge his overall career.)
Of course, today, DeCoteau is best known for directing the “Wrong” films for Lifetime. And really, I think the only thing that could have saved Dreamaniac would have been Vivica A. Fox showing up and saying, “Adam, you picked The Wrong Succubus.”
In Dark Flower, found footage foolishness abounds when the crew of a paranormal television show go to the woods to investigate a series of disappearances and instead end up being chased by the usual supernatural ghostlies and ghoulies. Hell, they’re probably being chased by the Blair Witch too. This movie isn’t shy about announcing what it’s copying. The camera shakes so we know it’s supposed to be authentic found footage and also to keep us from focusing on how bad the acting is and how low-rent the scares are. The television crew even like to film themselves when they’re just hanging out at home or selling drugs on the ranch. There’s not a compelling character to be found and the story is impossible to follow.
This movie does not appear to be listed on the imdb, though it’s on all the other movie sites. Maybe it really did happen! Nah.
In the 1985’s The Ripper, a straight-to-video, regional production, Richard Hartwell (Tom Schreier) is a college professor who teaches a class on Jack the Ripper. He discusses Jack the Ripper films, though he does at one point accidentally say that Murder By Decree starred Christopher Lee as Sherlock Holmes. (Lee did play Mycroft Holmes in The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes). He talks about some of the conspiracy theories that surround the Ripper. He encourages his students to try to move beyond the version of Jack the Ripper that’s been sold to them by Hollywood. Some of his fellow professors think that it’s a strange class and I kind of agree. I mean, can you really do an entire semester on just Jack the Ripper?
One day, while shopping at an antique store with his girlfriend, Carol (Mona Van Pernis), Richard comes across an antique ring. Even though the ring is way too big and kind of gauche, Carol loves it. Richard decides to secretly buy it for her. Unfortunately — and this is quite a coincidence considering Richard’s profession — the ring once belonged to Jack the Ripper. And, by putting the ring on his finger, Richard is allowing Jack the Ripper to come back to life in 80s Oklahoma!
Soon, local women are being murdered in ways that duplicate the grisly crimes of Whitechapel. The police suspect that it might be one of Richard’s students. When Richard sleeps, he’s haunted by dreams about the crimes, with the Ripper always appearing in the shadows. When the Ripper is finally revealed, it turns out that he’s …. TOM SAVINI!?
Well, kind of. Tom Savini does appear as Jack the Ripper towards the end of the film. Reportedly, he flew from Philadelphia to Oklahoma and shot his big scene in one day. For the rest of the film, though, the Ripper was played by a stand-in who was always either seen from behind or seen standing in the darkness with his face usually obscured. The few glimpses we do get of the stand-in’s face, it’s obvious that he looks very little like Tom Savini. (He does have a mustache and a beard but they both look like they were pasted on.) When Savini does actually play the Ripper, he seems slightly embarrassed by the whole thing. Tom Savini has always been a pretty good actor but, in The Ripper, he’s not given much to do other than glower at the camera with an evil look on his face. There’s little of the humor that Savini has brought to other roles and that’s a shame because Tom Savini can be a very charming actor when he’s allowed to poke fun at his image.
That said, I have to admit that I have a weakness for low-budget, regional films. In this case, it helps that I’ve spent enough time in Oklahoma, as both a visitor and an occasional resident, that I felt like I could immediately recognize almost every location in the film. There’s a DIY-charm to the film, one that is evident in both the stiff but likable performances and the gore effects, which are occasionally effective and occasionally rather cheesy. (A decapitation scene manages to be both.) Savini, I should mention, did not work on the special effects. This is a silly, nonsensical horror film that runs about 20 minutes too long but it’s just such a product of its time and place (i.e., Oklahoma in the mid-80s) that it’s rather fascinating as a time capsule. I mean, this may be the only Jack the Ripper film to feature an aerobics montage. It doesn’t get more 80s than that!
Today we celebrate Ed Wood’s 100th birthday with his sequel to Bride of the Monsters. In Night of the Ghouls, con man Dr. Alcula (Kenne Duncan) moves into Bela Lugosi’s old mansion and pretends to talk to the dead. What Alcula doesn’t realize is that the house is actually haunted (by Tor Johnson’s Lobo, among others) and real ghosts don’t appreciate pretend ghosts.
Through the Shattered Lens