SF GIANTS ARE THE 2010 WORLD SERIES CHAMP!!!


The drought is over!!

The San Francisco Giants are finally World Series Champions for the very first time since moving to San Francisco from New York. This has been a franchise which I call my very first sport’s love. I love the Niners. I love the Warriors. I love the Sharks. But in the end they’re all just mistresses with the Giants being my one true sport’s love.

This year’s team of rookies, cast-off veterans and just plain weirdos ended up being the perfect mixture to finally bring home the MLB World Series trophy to The City by the Bay. I give much respect to the Texas Rangers for giving the Giants all they can handle and even more. Giants fans should celebrate the team winning and give the Rangers their due. We’re Giants fans and not Phillies, Yankees or Red Sox fans so we tip our hats to the opposing team just as we celebrate our own.

The song by Queen and the lyrics in their song fits this Giants team to a T.

SF GIANTS ARE WORLD SERIES CHAMPS!!!!

Congrats to The Rangers


I don’t know a damn thing about baseball but I do know that the Rangers are going to the World Series and the Rangers are apparently from my hometown.  Oh, and the Ranger Josh Hamilton is apparently not the same guy as the actor Josh Hamilton.

Anyway, for now, I will also extend hearty congratulations to Arleigh because his team is apparently going to the World Series as well.  I learned today that apparently, San Francisco’s team is called the Giants and not the Phillies.  Apparently, the Phillies are actually Philadelphia’s team.  Actually, that makes a bit more sense.  I also found out that the Giants have a player with the exact same name as the former lead singer of the Beach Boys.

Anyway, congratulations to the Rangers (who I guess are now my team) and the Giants.  The song below is dedicated to both teams and to baseball fans everywhere…

Congrats to NLCS Champs SF GIANTS!!


Short but sweet…Congratulations to the San Francisco Giants for winning the National League Pennant to move onto the Fall Classic aka The World Series to the bandwagoners.

This team has taken torture baseball (almost as painful as watching torture porn flicks) and brought it to a new level. The nation will now learn and discover The Beard, The Freak, The Boss, The Kung Fu Panda and The Rally Thong.

No matter what happens in the World Series this Giants team has been fun to watch even if it has brought me to having a coronary more than a few times this year. But as the song says…

DON’T STOP BELIEVING!

The Regal Keystone Park 16, R.I.P.


 

Earlier this week, I discovered that, without warning, the Regal Keystone Park 16 had closed its door for good.

The Regal was not my favorite movie theater in the Dallas/Ft. Worth metroplex.  That honor would have to be jointly awarded to the Dallas and Plano Angelikas.  In fact, if anything, the Regal was somewhat trashy.  It was located right off of Central Expressway (which meant that traffic both entering and leaving theater was insane) and it sat directly across the street from a free clinic.  Whenever I went to the Regal, I was always very much aware of the constantly patrolling police cars.  There always seemed to be something dramatic happening at the apartments across the street from the theater. 

Despite the police presence, I could always count on being accosted by one at least one homeless person.  Most of the time they would just ask for money though other times they just wanted to tell me about who was actually in charge of the world.  Most of the time, it seemed to be the Vatican.  I would smile politely and hope they were too busy ranting to notice the St. Vitus medal around my neck.

One of the few times I actually made the mistake of going to the Regal by myself, I was greeted in the parking lot by a bearded, foul-smelling man who was about a foot taller than me and who outweighed me by over a hundred pounds.  He started walking towards me as soon as I got out of my car and even though I quickened my pace, he quickly caught up to me.  Walking less than a couple of inches behind me, he loudly asked me if I liked to perform a certain sexual act.  He kept following me, asking me this all the way to the theater doors but he didn’t step inside the theater after me.  The whole time this was going on, the parking lot was filled with other filmgoers who heard what the man asked and saw how quickly I was walking away from him.  Not one of them said a word or, as far as I know, even called the police.  That’s the type of theater that the Regal was.

(Incidentally, I called the police as soon as I got inside the theater.  I’m not sure what happened exactly but the man wasn’t there when I left two hours later.  The movie I saw, by the way, was Lakeview Terrace, starring Samuel L. Jackson.)

Still, I’m going to miss going to the Regal.  For one thing, it was close to where I live now and it was close to where I lived previously.  So, even if it was by default, it was kind of my theater.  As trashy as the outside was, the inside was usually pretty clean.  Plus, I went enough times that I got to know — at least on a visual level — most of the people who worked there.  For instance, there was the elderly gentleman who — no matter what time of day I went to the Regal — always seemed to be working behind ticket table.  Usually, he’d end up giving us tickets to the wrong movie but he seemed like a nice old man and he always had a smile ready for me whenever he saw me stepping through the front doors.  I’m going to miss him.

No, the Regal wasn’t perfect but it’s a place where I spent a lot of hours and I’ve got a lot of memories of that place.  To an extent, I’m not surprised that it closed its doors.  It was, obviously, located in a terrible neighborhood and often times it did so little business that me and whoever I had come with would end up watching our movie in an empty theater.  That’s good for those of us who like to have sex while watching movies but, as a question of simple economics, it’s not a formula for success.  Still, I would have liked a chance to say goodbye.

On Friday, me and my sister Erin drove down to the old Regal, specifically to take some pictures for this little memorial.  Unfortunately, no sooner had Erin take a few pictures before we were confronted by some fat asshole in a golf cart who wanted to know why we were taking pictures. 

To be honest, I have issues with authority on a good day and Friday was not, at that point, a very good day.  So, as Erin put the lens cap back on her camera, I sensibly replied, “I really don’t think that’s any of your fucking business.”

“Some people take pictures because they want to case a place before they rob it,” Mr. Fascist-On-A-Golf-Cart replied.

At this point, Erin had unlocked her car and was attempting to lead me over to it.  However, as I retreated, I politely replied, “Your mother sucks cock in Hell, Karras.”

That shut the pig up.  I’m still wondering if he realized I was merely quoting The Exorcist or if he thought maybe I actually was possessed.

Anyway, the pictures in this post were all taken by Erin Nicole Bowman on Friday and I thank her for both helping me pay tribute to the Angelika and for keeping me out of jail.

Here, in alphabetical order, is as complete a list as possible of every film I saw at the Regal Keystone Park 16, starting with Iron Man on June 10th, 2008 and ending with Secretariat on October 12th, 2010.

Adventureland

The American

An American Carol

The Black Waters of Echo’s Pond

The Blind Side

The Book of Eli

Brothers

Burn After Reading

Changeling

Clash of the Titans

The Crazies

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

The Dark Knight

Despicable Me

Drag Me To Hell

Eat Pray Love

The Expendables

Everybody’s Fine

The Fantastic Mr. Fox

Funny People

Get Him To The Greek

Get Low

The Happening

How To Train Your Dragon

The Informant!

Inglorious Basterds

Invictus

Iron Man

Iron Man 2

Lakeview Terrace

The Last Exorcism

Legion

Let Me In

The Losers

The Lovely Bones

Machete

The Men Who Stare At Goats

Ninja Assassin

The Other Guys

Paranormal Activity

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time

Public Enemies

Resident Evil: Afterlife

Robin Hood

Salt

Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World

Secretariat

Sherlock Holmes

Shutter Island

Splice

Star Trek

Taken

The Town

Toy Story 3

Tropic Thunder

Twelve

Up

Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps

Wall-E

Watchmen

The Wolf Man

Zombieland

Regal Keystone Park 16, R.I.P.

Titanic In Retrospect


Recently, I tried to rewatch an obscure art film from 1997 called Titanic.  From the time I was 12 until I was 16, I watched this movie a lot and, without fail, I cried and cried at the movie’s end.  (Admittedly, it was pretty easy to make me cry back then.)  I decided to rewatch it because I was curious as to whether or not Titanic could still make me cry. 

For those of you who aren’t into art films, here’s a quick synopsis and review of Titanic.

The film’s plot: Bill Paxton and an obnoxious fat guy are held hostage on a submarine by a senile old biddy who insists on telling them the story of how she lost her virginity 98 years ago.

Meanwhile, in London, Leonardo DiCaprio steals some poor kid’s sketch book and then sneaks onto a cruise ship where, pretending to be an artist, he seduces and murders lonely widows. 

Also on the cruise ship is Kate Winslet.  Kate’s engaged to Billy Zane but she’s unhappy about it because — well, there’s some men you fuck and there’s some men you marry and let’s just say that you don’t marry Billy Zane.  Once the boat sets sail, Kate decides to jump overboard.  However, just before she can jump, she’s spotted by Leo.  Leo quickly tosses a burlap sack containing the corpse of Lady Astor into the Atlantic and then rescues Kate.

Kate rewards him by taking him down to her cabin and showing him a painting by Someone Picasso.  (Early on in the film, Billy correctly says that Someone Picasso will never amount to anything and that’s true.  Someone was always overshadowed by his older brother Pablo.)  Leo looks at the painting and says, “Look at what he does with color here.”  As a former Art History major, that line made me smile.  That’s the type of statement that is regularly uttered by people who can’t think of anything else to say.  When a guy looks at a painting and says, “Look at what he does with color here,” what he’s actually saying is, “Look, babe, I went to the damn art museum with you so there better be a blow job in my immediate future.”

Leo has dinner with Billy and Kate.  Leo says, “I’m just a tumbleweed blowing in the wind.”  Over at the next table, a shifty young man named Bob Dylan overhears and thinks, “That would make a good song.  But the little man must die so nobody knows I stole that line from him…”

Anyway, Leo eventually slips Kate a rohypnol, convinces her to pose naked while he secretly tapes her for Youtube, and then proceeds  to have sex with her in the back seat of a car.  Afterward, Kate says, “Do you want to hang out tomorrow?”  Leo replies, “Uhmm…I might be busy.  I’ll call you.”  “My God,” I said as I watched all this, “it’s like reliving my freshman year of college all over again.”

Anyway, 8 more hours pass.  All the rich passengers on the ship do rich things while all the poor passengers get drunk and trash the lower levels of the boat.  Suddenly, without warning, the boat is besieged by the living dead.  Billy Zane insists that they would be safer in the basement.  Leo disagrees while Kate says, “So, you think you can just fuck me and leave!?  No way!”

12 more hours pass.  The living dead manage to rip a hole in the side of the boat.  Billy chases Leo and Kate around the Titanic as it sinks.  “I hope you’ll be very happy together!” he screams.  Meanwhile, up top, two rich guys put on tuxedos and one of them says something like, “We’re going to die like gentlemen.”  Which I guess is what they end up doing though, honestly, it sounds to me like the guy’s just being a smartass.

Eventually, Kate and Leo end up sitting on an iceberg together.  Kate wonders if this is a dream.  Leo proceeds to spin a top on the ice to find out.  Suddenly, Bob Dylan floats by in a rowboat.  “This machine kills fascists!” he shouts as he shoots Leo with a crossbow.  Leo sinks into the water.  Bob Dylan smirks.  “How does it feel to be on your own?” he asks.

The end.

A quick review: I guess the easiest way to review Titanic is to answer my original question.  Does the film still make me, at the age of 24, cry like it did when I was 12?  No, it does not.  To be honest, the only tears that I shed while rewatching Titanic were tears of shame and boredom.  This is the movie that I once thought was the greatest thing ever?  True, I was young and stupid but still…

On the plus side, Kate Winslet gives a good performance even if her character is basically just a sexist male fantasy.  Billy Zane is also a lot of fun as her jilted suitor.

On the negative side, there’s everything else.  The script — written by Someone Cameron — is full of laughably bad lines and plotwise, the film has all the depth of a lanced boil.  The romantic elements of the plot made me cry back when I was 12 because I didn’t have a whole lot of real world experience to compare Titanic’s fantasy against.  Now, at the age of 24, I’ve actually had to deal with my fair share of guys who say actually do make dumbfug statement about things like being a tumbleweed blowing in the wind (not to mention being king of the world).  I’m not saying that a good movie can’t present a romantic idealization of reality.  I’m just saying that a good movie can do that without insulting the viewer’s intelligence like Titanic does.

One last note — Leo DiCaprio has become a great actor.  But, in Titanic, he just comes across like a shrill poseur.

I Learned Something Today Conclusion: Just because you and a million others think that a movie is great today, that doesn’t mean that the movie’s going to be anywhere near as good 12 years later.  In this age of Avatar and the Social Network, that’s a lesson that I think many self-appointed film “gurus” would do well to consider before they throw a hissy fit just because a complete stranger on the Internet disagrees with them.

Avatar 2: Na’vi Holocaust


Dear James Cameron,

Hi, my name is Lisa Marie Bowman and I hate just about every movie you’ve ever made.  Well, that’s not totally true.  First off, I haven’t seen every movie you’ve ever made.  And I have to admit that when I was 12, I would cry and cry whenever I saw Titanic.  So, let’s just say that I hate Avatar and I thought it was kinda fun to watch your ex-wife kick your ass at the Oscars earlier this year.

From my research, it appears that you take issue with people who disagree with you or who dare to suggest that you might not be the greatest filmmaker since DeMille.  So, let me just add that this letter is being written by me and me only.  When you send out your army of Orcs to punish the heretic at Through The Shattered Lens, they need only come for me.  I may think you’re just a cranky, old dumbfug toadsucker but that’s my opinion and mine alone.

See, here’s what Arleigh had to say about Avatar.

And here’s what I said.

See, good people can have differing opinions.  Unfortunately, just judging from some of your comments in the past, I don’t think you quite understand that.  Maybe that explains why, rather than defend your movie, you always seem to end up accusing your critics of supporting global warming and the war in Iraq.  Maybe that’s why the few Oscars that Avatar won were all accepted by balding little eunuchs who spent their whole acceptance speech praising your name as if they knew that if they didn’t, you’d end up going all psycho killer on them.

But I’m getting off topic.

This letter was inspired by the news that you’re apparently planning on setting the sequel to Avatar underwater.

Wow, that sounds really, really …. boring.

Listen, James, I’m going to help you out.  Here’s my plotline for Avatar 2, which, trust me, is a lot more interesting than anything you’re planning on doing.

The film opens on Earth.  As you explained in the first film, there “is no green” on Earth.  But there are television networks and there are documentary crews.  One of these networks has recently sent a group of young filmmakers to Pandora.  Their assignment?  To track down the Na’vi and to make a documentary about these “brutal savages” and their life on the green hell that is Pandora.

(Yes, James, this film is a prequel.  Perhaps you could have Jake’s brother getting murdered in the background of one of the opening New York City shots.)

However, a week after the documentary crew first arrived on Pandora, all contact with them has been lost.  The television networks hires a portly anthropology professor to go to Pandora and find out what has happened.  Before the professor leaves on his mission, he is informed that the documentarians frequently staged the very atrocities that their films are known for.

Our anthropology professor — let’s call him Nick, since I know you like to dumb things down — goes to Pandora.  With the help of a native guide, he manages to track down the Na’vi and win their trust.  Taken to the Na’vi village, he discovers that the remains of the documentary crew are hanging from the Soul Tree.  He realizes that they were captured and eaten by the Na’vi.  However, the Na’vi did not destroy any of the film crew’s cameras.  The footage of their final days in the jungles of Pandora has been preserved.  Nick steals the footage and manages to make it back to “civilization” even as hordes of angry Na’vi chase after him (not mention Sigourney Weaver who can do a cameo somewhere around here).

While all this is going on, the film will occasionally pause to show grainy stock footage of various jungle animals being killed in various sickening ways.

Nick returns to Earth with the film.  Sitting in a dark theater with the television executives, Nick views the footage.

Now, James, this is the tricky part.  The “found footage” will dominate the last 40 minutes of Avatar 2.  It’s important that the footage look so authentic that, for decades after, various dumbfugs will swear that they’re watching actual footage of actual people being eaten on camera.  So, you’re going to have to abandon the 3-D for this part of the film.  Instead, you’ll have to develop a multi-billion dollar process that will make the film look damaged.  I’m talking about random scratches, unsynchronized sound, solarization, the whole deal. 

As for the footage itself, this is what will make Avatar 2 special.  We’ll see how the documentary crew staged “reality.”  We’ll watch as they set a Na’Vi village on fire and how they arrogantly assumed that they’re superior to the natives.  Finally, however, the Na’Vi will strike back and, in the film’s final moment, we’ll watch as the documentarians are eaten by the Na’Vi while their own cameras silently record the massacre.

We’ll call it Avatar 2: Na’Vi Holocaust.

I think it could be a winner.

Love,

Lisa Marie

Satoshi Kon’s Final Blog Post


The sudden passing of Satoshi Kon this past August 24, 2010 was a shock to anime and non-anime fans of his work. No better words were spoken to describe his contribution to the medium he so loved than one posted here last week.

I, myself, never realized that he was the one who had directed the very mature anime works I had seen and found to be on the level of any live-action production by such luminaries as Aronofsky, Nolan, Cronenberg and many other masters of their craft. The suddenness of his death has shocked the anime community and even almost a week since it happened his passing away and his legacy still the talk of the community.

His legacy is undisputable and will forever remind fans of anime just how much his talent will be missed. Satoshi Kon was able to leave behind one final document which has been posted in his blog posthumously by his loved ones. These last words from Satoshi Kon brings to light one man’s personal and intimate perspective on one’s mortality. It’s almost as if life was imitating art this time around. To try and describe any more of this man’s last words cannot be done as I lack the insight and grasp of the English language to give it the proper due.

Below is the link to Makiko Itoh’s site who was kind enough to translate Satoshi Kon’s final words.

SOURCE: Makiko Itoh’s Blog Satoshi Kon’s last words

10 Reasons Not To Sit In A Theater Full Of Old People


This is the most difficult post I’ve ever had to write.

This is largely because I wore my glasses (instead of my contacts) last night because I knew I was going to be sleeping over at Jeff’s place.  Now, it’s the morning and we can’t find my glasses.  So, while he continues to search, I am sitting here trying to write despite being blind.  Seriously, as I type this, my face is less than half-an-inch away from Jeff’s monitor.  If I squint real hard, I can kinda sorta make out the letter-shaped blobs that are blinking in front of me.

In other words, there might be some typos in this post.  Sorry — I’ll correct them once I can see again.

This post came to me last night as we were watching the new Robert Duvall film Get Low at the Regal Keystone Park 16 in Richardson, Texas.  Get Low is a good movie and Duvall gives a brilliant performance but, from the minute we first found our seats, I realized that I was literally the youngest person in the audience. 

I suppose I should define just what exactly this article’s definition of “old” is.  Originally, I was thinking of old as being anyone who is older than me (that is, anyone born before 1985).  However, that would include Jeff, all three of my sisters, and just about every other contributor to this site.  So, I revised my definition. 

From now on, old is anyone over the age of 40.

With that cleared up, on to this list:

1) Old people never show up for the movie on time.  Seriously, the first 20 minutes of Get Low were pretty much dominated by fat old people wandering around in the dark, searching for a seat.  Considering that movies never actually start when they’re supposed to and even then there’s about 15 minutes worth of commercials and trailers, there’s really no excuse for being that late.  Beyond, I guess, the arrogance that comes from being old.

2) Old people are mean.  It’s true!  And who wants to sit in the dark with a bunch of mean people?

3) Old people reek of buttery popcorn and stale nachos.  Listen, I like popcorn and I like butter on my popcorn.  And I like nachos too though I prefer the real thing as opposed to the lukewarm American version.  And, sometimes, I’ll get some popcorn to eat during the movie.  That, in itself, is not a sin.  That’s just being American.  However, I don’t use popcorn as a substitute for any of the major food groups.  But my God — what is the deal with old people who come waddling into the theater late and, of course, they’ve got a giant tub of popcorn in one hand and a giant tray of nachos in the other.  And since they waddle, what that means is that every step they take means that popcorn is going to be flying everywhere.  And then, once they do find a seat, they seem to feel the need to shake their giant tub of popcorn every few minutes as if to remind the rest of us that they’ve got a giant tub of popcorn and we don’t.  I mean, seriously, it’s time that the obese old people of the world accept the fact that not everything has to revolve around them.

4) Many old people are obese.  Before anyone says anything, I don’t feel good about writing that.  Obesity is a legitimate health concern and it’s often more the result of low self-esteem than anything else.  If I had enough money to get every obese old person liposuction, I would.  But I don’t and it doesn’t change the fact that obese old people make it difficult to enjoy a night out at the movies.  Whether it’s the fact that it takes them forever to find a seat and sit down or just the fact that they remind me of death, the grotesquely obese can be an issue.

5) Old people can’t drive.  This is less an issue when you’re watching the movie but definitely a concern when you’re trying to leave the theater afterward.  I mean, I understand that cars worked differently back in the Middle Ages but  seriously, we’ve reached a point where the engine’s not going to explode just because you tap the accelerator a little.

6) Old people can’t hear.  I love movies that are full of twists and turns.  What I can’t stand, however, is when I have to listen to the person behind me explaining all those twists and turns as they happen just because her companion is too freaking stubborn to get a hearing aid! 

7) Old people always want to do the whole Roger Ebert thing.  By this, I mean that after the movie ends, old people always want to sit there and go, “I didn’t like that…” or “The plot was too predictable.”  Okay, good for you, you’ve got an opinion.  So do I.  But I, at least, try to express my opinions in an interesting way.  “That plot was too predictable.”  Seriously, with all your years of life experience, you can be more witty than that.

8 ) Old people make weird noises.  Seriously, if you have to clear your throat that many times, you should probably be at the ER instead of the movies.

9) Old people don’t respect your privacy.  Seriously, what me and a friend choose to do while the movie is playing is our own business.  Keep your eyes on the screen, you old perverts.

10) Old people create awkward situations.  Seriously, no disrespect is meant by this but if someone in the audience dies while the movie’s playing, what is my obligation here beyond calling 911?  Is it acceptable for me to then watch the rest of the movie once I’ve called 911 or would that be considered a faux pas on my part?  I mean, what if it’s a really good movie?

Satoshi Kon R.I.P (October 12, 1963 – August 23, 2010)


It’s been awhile since I’ve posted any updates, and while I’ve always meant to get something written up, I always found excuses not to. But with the recent passing of Satoshi Kon, it would be remiss of me not to post up my thoughts of the career of one of the truly great anime directors. First I’ll give a brief rundown on his works as director, along with my thoughts of each and then I’ll end with some closing thoughts on his career in general.

Perfect Blue (1998)

This was my first experience with the directing talents of Mr. Kon, as well as his directorial debut.  Back in 2001 when I was just starting to get into actually buying DVDs of anime, I asked around which titles I should own.  Among the responses, Perfect Blue kept coming up, so I decided to give it a shot.  Back then I didn’t really follow anime websites or magazines, nor was torrenting really a driving force, so this was a complete blind buy for me.  What I got really opened my eyes to what anime could be like.  Before this, anime to me largely was giant robots blowing things up, or martial arts masters powering up for 20 episodes and blowing things up.  Never did I think that anime would be an effective means for bringing me a psychological thriller that so blurred the lines between reality and fiction.  Plus, it tells a tale of obsession for idols in Japan that rings just as true today as it did back in 1998, as one can see happening between Aya Hirano and the degenerates of 2ch.

Millennium Actress (2001)

Next up for Mr. Kon was Millennium Actress.  A popular, recurring theme in most of his works is the blurring of the lines between reality and fiction and this movie brought it to an even higher level than Perfect Blue.  The biggest difference between the two is Millennium Actress is a lot more light hearted in tone than the fairly dark Perfect Blue was, even if the argument can be made that it doesn’t necessarily have a happy ending.  Throughout the film, we are brought through the life of an actress as she recounts her career and her search for the love of her life.  However, it’s shown by placing the people telling the tale into the movies of her career and then popping back into reality, sometimes leaving one to wonder what was real and what was scripted.  Such a directing technique does come with the risk of turning viewers off if it gets too convoluted, but Satoshi Kon knew just the right amount of tweaking to do to keep one thinking, but turn into outright confusion for the sake of confusion.

Tokyo Godfathers (2003)

For his third film, Satoshi Kon put the blurring of reality and fiction on the back burner and instead focused more on the human relations.  Tokyo Godfathers looks at the lives of three homeless people and a baby they find on Christmas Eve.  While the story told here is a bit more straightforward than his other offerings, it has a lot more emotional impact as you find out what led each of these three to where they are, and also what led the baby to being abandoned.  Rest assured, the story doesn’t get to its conclusion without a couple twists and turns along the way, but this one has the closest to a happy ending as any of his movies.  The fact that it manages to tell a compelling tale without having to use his psychological tool shows why Satoshi Kon was such a respected director.

Paranoia Agent (2004)

This marks Satoshi Kon’s first and only foray into directing a television series, and if Tokyo Godfathers was him taking a break from the psychological aspect of his stories, Paranoia Agent more than makes up for the lost time.  The show centers upon a police investigation into a series of attacks on people by a boy with a golden bat.  But, as I said, this is a return to form for Mr. Kon, and so there’s much more to this than merely some attacks.  Plus, add in the fact that in each case after the attacks, the people feel almost grateful for it as it seemed to help them fix their various stresses in life and you have a story that will keep you wondering right up until the end.  Admittedly, there are times when it seems like the story is going to get out of control, and it’s easy to see that Mr. Kon is much more comfortable creating feature length films rather than regular television series, but the fact that it still manages to work shows the true talents of the man.  I feel confident that had he lived longer, we would have seen another series from him, and since he already had the experience under his belt, he could have done an even better job than the already fine showing he did here.

Paprika (2006)

His most recent completed work was 2006’s Paprika.  A big theme in this movie is dreams, so as you can imagine the lines between reality and fiction get blurred once again.  In fact, they’re so blurred, that they often wind up breaking the fourth wall within the context of the movie to the point where dreams and reality become one and the same.  While personally not my favorite movie of his, it shows that even though he uses the same theme throughout most of his works, he still is able to tell a compelling story each time without it feeling predictable and tired.

Satoshi Kon was working on a new film set to release in 2011 called Yume Miru Kikai, or The Dream Machine.  Sadly, due to his untimely death, the status of the film is now unknown.  One would imagine that production will continue, and hopefully Mr. Kon shared his vision of the film with others so that it may be completed as he would have wanted it to be.  The head of Madhouse Studios, for which Mr. Kon was working, stated it was a sudden death from cancer, although Japanese entertainment firms are notorious for their privacy and the privacy of their talent so just how long Mr. Kon had been afflicted with the disease is hard to say.  Whether or not this film sees the light of day, one of the shining lights of the anime industry has sadly been extinguished far too early.  With the dearth of talented young anime directors, this loss will be felt all the more acutely.  Rest in peace, Mr. Kon, you will be sorely missed.

Rooney Mara as Lisbeth Salander?


It’s official.  The role of Lisbeth Salander in the thoroughly unnecessary and borderline insulting American remake of The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo will be played by Rooney Mara.

It’s hard for me to say how I feel about this casting.  When I first heard about it, my initial thought was, “Who’s that and how could she be better suited for the role than Jena Malone?”  However, after talking to Arleigh, I realized that I actually do know Rooney Mara.  She was the lead in another remake, this year’s Nightmare on Elm Street.  In that movie, Mara was a likable presence but she was no Lisbeth.  Then again, woman like Lisbeth Salander — independent women who refuse to be solely defined as either a good virgin or a bad whore — don’t appear in slasher films.  What is important is that Mara has proven she can carry a film.  She hasn’t proven that she can carry The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.

Then again, considering just how iconic a figure as Lisbeth has become (both in the original novel and in the original film) it’s probably for the best that director David Fincher went with an unknown.  Rooney appears to be a talented young actress but she’s got a very difficult job ahead of her.

It’s probably not a coincidence that Rooney also has a small role in Fincher’s upcoming film, The Social Network (which is going to suck, by the way).  It’s possible that Fincher saw something in Rooney that she hasn’t been allowed to show the rest of the world.  Me, I’m just happy that if there is going to be an American version of Lisbeth Salander, at least she’s going to be played by an Irish-American.  At heart, Lisbeth is as Irish as a Swede can get.

(Though again, the ideal Irish-American to play Lisbeth would have been and still is Jena Malone.)

As I’ve stated before, I have mixed feelings about the remake of the Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.  (And yes, it is a remake regardless of what they’re saying over at Awardsdaily.com.)  On the one hand, the entire literary Millenium Trilogy (of which The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo was the 1st part) is one of the best recent works of pop cultural fiction.  Lisbeth Salander is destined to be an iconic noir figure.  On a personal note, even though she’s ultimately just a fictional character, she is a fictional character who has provided a great deal of strength and hope to abuse survivors (such as myself).  When we read about her and her refusal to allow herself to be victimized or to be dependent on even as well-meaning a man as Mikael Blomkvist, the book’s nominal hero, Lisbeth Salander becomes the vehicle for our own wish-fulfillment fantasies.  She is a character who transcends the page to become a role model in real life as well.  In many ways, she is the 21st century version of Scarlett O’Hara.  Scarlett gave hope to aging Southern belles.  Lisbeth gives hope to bipolar neurotics like me.  And much as everyone couldn’t wait to see Scarlett on-screen, a lot of us couldn’t wait to see Lisbeth on-screen.

And that is the biggest hurdle that director David Fincher and Rooney Mara are going to face with this much-hyped remake of The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.  We’ve already seen Libseth onscreen and, in our mind’s eye, she’s not Rooney Mara.  Instead, she’s Noomi Rapace.  Both Fincher and Mara have a difficult task ahead of them.  Not only do they have to meet the expectations of the people who have read the original novel, they have to exceed the expectations of the people who have seen the original Swedish film.

And that, to me, is the issue that is being avoided, the proverbial Elephant in the room.  For all the wannabe, internet-based film critics who are currently gleefully devouring any crumbs of information concerning Fincher’s production, nobody has yet to answer the question as to why this film needs to be made at all?  (Beyond the obvious fact that there’s money to be made…) 

I found it interesting that, at the end of the EW article concerning Mara’s casting, it is mentioned that the film is set to begin filming in Sweden.  Why exactly?  Hasn’t a film about a girl with a dragon tattoo who helps a smug journalist investigate a disappearance in Sweden already been made?  It would seem that the “American version” has little to offer beyond offering up a fantasy Sweden where everyone speaks English and those viewing the film are freed from having to try to read subtitles and rattle their jumbo tubs of popcorn at the same time.  Or are we just sending David Fincher over to Sweden because we think we’ve got a thing or two to teach the nation that gave us Ingmar Bergman?

It’s easy to find a lot of people trying to convince themselves that this film is a guaranteed classic.  (“I’m so happy they cast Robin Wright!” they exclaim.  “I usually hate remakes but with David Fincher aboard, I’m looking forward to this,” another one will say.  And, of course, my favorite: “This movie is not a remake!”)  But nobody seems to be willing to address just why exactly we would need a new Lisbeth Salander when she’s already been created to perfection by Noomi Rapace.

Seriously, both Rapace and Lisbeth deserves better.

For that matter, so does Rooney Mara.