Author Archives: Lisa Marie Bowman

Retro Television Review: Malibu CA 2.26 “Three Dudes And A Baby”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Malibu CA, which aired in Syndication in 1998 and 1999.  Almost the entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!

Yes, this is from the first season. I don’t care. I refuse to waste my time looking for a second season advertisement.

All good things must end.

And so must all bad things.

Episode 2.26 “Three Dudes And A Baby”

(Dir by Gary Shimokawa, originally aired on May 20th, 2000)

It’s over!

After two seasons and over 50 episodes, Malibu, CA is over!

As opposed to the other Peter Engel shows that I’ve reviewed on this site, Malibu CA doesn’t get a real finale.  Instead, the final episode is just another stupid 22 minutes that signify nothing.  When waitress Stacie (Kristen Miller) goes out of town, Murray, Jason, and Peter take care of her baby.  Awwwww …. wait a minute.  Why would anyone leave their baby with those idiots?

When the three men find out that Stacie is getting divorced from her husband, all three try to step up.  Murray asks Stacie to marry him.  So does Jason.  Peter offers to adopt her.  Stacie reveals that she and her husband have decided to stay together.  Are you sure, Stacie?  Murray is like really rich.

Meanwhile, Lisa (the character, not me!) gets upset because her little sister is a fan of Traycee’s television show and is thinking of quitting college so she can become an actress.  Lisa blames all of this on Traycee which is weird because 1) Traycee didn’t force Lisa’s sister to do anything and 2) Traycee has found a lot of success as an actress and if Traycee can do it, why can’t Lisa’s sister do it?

This is a typical Lisa story.  Lisa (the character, not me!) acts like a total bitch, whines nonstop, and blames everything on Traycee, even though none of it is really Traycee’s fault.  Adding the character of Lisa was one of the biggest mistakes that was Malibu CA made during its second season.  The first season was pretty dire but, in the end, it was actually better than the second season and that’s entirely because the first season did not feature Lisa (the character, not me).  I don’t want to be too hard on the actress who played her because it’s not exactly as if she was being given great material to work with.  That said, Lisa was a poorly-written character who basically was portrayed as always being annoyed with something.  The fact that the finale of the show focuses on her as opposed to wrapping up the stories of Jason and Scott says a lot about why this show was the most forgettable of all of the Peter Engel-produced sitcoms.

And so, Malibu CA comes to a close and there’s really not much to say about it.  Peter Engel tried to work his Saved By The Bell/California Dreams/Hang Time magic but the show never really found a consistent tone and neither of the Collins brothers were particularly likable protagonists.  It’s really not a shock that neither Jason Hayes nor Trevor Merszei went on to have acting careers after this show ended.

On a positive note, Brandon Brooks and Priscilla Inga Taylor were consistently amusing, if just because they were smart enough to embrace the oddness of their characters.  And Ed Blatchford had his moments as the father figure.  Otherwise, this was a forgettable sitcom that signified the end of an era.

Next week, something new will be coming to TSL in this timeslot.  What will it be?  We’ll find out next Thursday!

4 Shots From 4 Films: Special Wim Wenders Edition

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

4 Or More Shots From 4 Or More Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!

Today, the Shattered Lens wishes a happy 78th birthday to the great German director, Wim Wenders!  It’s time for….

4 Shots From 4 Wim Wenders Films

The American Friend (1976, dir by Wim Wenders, DP: Robby Muller)

Paris, Texas (1984, dir by Wim Wenders, DP: Robby Muller)

Wings of Desire (1987, dir by Wim Wenders, DP: Robby Muller)

Until the End of the World (1991, dir by Wim Wenders, DP: Robby Muller)

Music Video of the Day: Dulce Amor by David Archuleta (2025, dir by Nathan Kim)

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

In case you were wondering whatever happened to David Archuleta, here you go.

Myself, I can still remember when David Archuleta was on American Idol.  There was actually a lot of controversy when he came in second to David Cook, which always struck me as a bit odd.  Archuleta seemed like a nice guy with an okay voice.  David Cook actually had talent.

(If anything, this was the season that showed how silly it was to have adult performers competing against teenagers.)

Oh, the Archuleta stans were crazy.  I remember posting some very jejune criticism of Archuleta’s performance of Imagine on a message board and getting accused of being a “psychopath” for not enjoying Archuleta’s rather weepy interpretation.

My favorite that season was Jason Castro, just because of how obviously stoned he was.

As for today, Archuleta’s a boring ex-Mormon now.  Who didn’t see that coming?  This video presents us with Archuleta the angel, which is like whatever.  I honestly think it wouldn’t hurt him to get a new management team.  Either that or I guess he could become a perennial political candidate like Clay Aiken.

Enjoy!

Late Night Retro Television Review: 1st & Ten 1.5 “Play Me Or Trade Me”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing 1st and Ten, which aired in syndication from 1984 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on Tubi.

This week, an injury leads to the promise of sex …. or does it?

Episode 1.5 “Play Me Or Trade Me”

(Dir by Bruce Seth Green, originally aired on December 23rd, 1984)

Carl Whitherspoon, the star running back who is always demanding more money, is injured while filming a commercial for a rental car company.  (“Call OJ,” the commercial’s director says when it becomes obvious that Carl won’t be able to jump over any more luggage.)  The Bulls are struggling and Coach Denardo wants a championship but his star player is out for four weeks!

It’s time to trade!  Unfortunately, the only way that the Bulls are going to be able to get the running back they want is by trading their aging quarterback, Bob Dorsey.  Dana is upset about losing Bob but then she realizes she can finally have sex with him if he’s no longer a Bull and she decides that she’s okay with the trade.

But then the running back that the Bulls were hoping to trade for is injured so the trade is called off.  So, Dana can’t have sex with Bob.  But Bob still leads the team to victory.  Actually, the team wins because Bubba (Prince Hughes) blocks a field goal with his oversized ass.   (That’s not me being rude.  Bubba’s weight and the size of his ass is a running theme on this show.)  The Bulls are now 5-3 and I guess they don’t need a running back after all.

The main theme of this episode seemed to be that Dana needs to get laid.  I liked the chemistry between Delta Burke and Geoffrey Scott.  And the scene where Carl injured himself made me laugh just because of Sam Scarber’s over-the-top facial expressions as he crashed into a table.  Otherwise, this episode was pretty forgettable.

Music Video Of The Day: I Belong To Me by Jessica Simpson (2006, dir by Matthew Rolston)

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

I went to the same high school as Jessica Simpson!

Of course, I didn’t go there at the same time that Jessica did.  Jessica was long gone by the time I started the 9th grade.  As well, I actually graduated while Jessica dropped out so she could become a super-rich celebrity instead.  That said, I did take a few classes that were taught by Jessica’s former teachers, who all agreed that Jessica was a sweet person.  To be honest, most of my classmates made a big deal about being kind of cynical about going to the same high school as Jessica Simpson.  You’re never more jaded than you are between the ages of 13 and 18.  Myself, I’ve always liked Jessica Simpson because we’re both from Texas and we both occasionally play dumb for the laughs.

Anyway, this song was written when Jessica was going through a very public divorce from Nick Lachey.  It’s an empowerment song that also happens to be really depressing, which is really the best type of song there is.  There’s something to be said for a good depressing song and a good depressing video.

Enjoy!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 2.15 “Black Pearl”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network!  It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week, the bicycle mayhem continues.

Episode 2.15 “Black Pearl”

(Dir by Terence H. Winkless, originally aired on January 5th, 1997)

TC arrests a woman named Alana (Angela Shelton) on drug and assault charges, just to discover that she’s an undercover DEA agent.  TC fears that Alana is in over her head and he tells Alana’s superior, Enright (John Michael Bolger) that he needs to pull her out of the operation.  Enright is like, “Whatever, bicycle boy.”

And, to be honest, I think Enright kind of has a point.  Why are the bicycle cops always trying to tell other law enforcement agencies what to do?  Every episode, either TC or Palermo and Chris gets a really angry look in their eyes and starts barking out orders at people they barely know.  It’s bad enough that they ride bicycles.  Do they have to act like a bunch of self-righteous pricks as well?

Speaking of bicycles, Victor has to get recertified to be a bike cop.  Uh-oh, sounds like Victor could lose his job!  Even worse, Victor’s partner in this episode is Chris so not only is Victor in danger of getting fired but he has to spend an entire week listening to Chris put him down.  Seriously, there are few characters in the history of television that I dislike as much as I dislike Chris Kelly.  Chris is the type who dismisses everyone’s problems before then launching into her hundredth monologue about how much it sucks going from being an Air Force pilot to a bike cop.

Victor trains with Hans Rhey.  In this episode, everyone is like, “Oh my God, Hans Rey!”  I had no idea who Hans Rey was.  I looked him up after this episode and apparently, he was a superstar on the bicycle circuit.  Hans does a lot of clunky bike tricks  As was so often the case withe professional athletes who played themselves on shows like this, he wasn’t much of an actor.  If anything, this episode reminded me of how stupid most people look riding their bicycles in the middle of the street.

Victor gets recertified.  Alana ends up dead.  Presumably, TC’s upset but since the actor playing him was only capable of one fascial expression, it can be hard to tell.  In the end, the real tragedy remains how dorky everyone looks on the bicycles.

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 7.5 “Roarke’s Sacrifice/The Butler’s Affair”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984.  Unfortunately, the show has been removed from most streaming sites.  Fortunately, I’ve got nearly every episode on my DVR.

This week, Roarke is haunted by a past love.

Episode 7.5 “Roarke’s Sacrifice/The Butler’s Affair”

(Dir by Cliff Bole, originally aired on November 12th, 1983)

This is an odd episode.  Both of the stories deal with love.  In one of them, Lee Meriwether plays a woman who is in love with her butler, Efrem Zimbalist, Jr.  She comes to Fantasy Island with a group of friends, all of whom are very judgmental about the idea of Meriwether dating a member of the help.  Mr. Roarke deals with the situation by threatening to reveal all of their secrets.  He explains that he does a thorough background check on everyone who comes to Fantasy Island.  I’m not sure if I buy that because some really bad folks have come to the Island.  Anyway, this story ends with Zimbalist starting to loosen up and Meriwether saying that she was going to continue to train him to be her boyfriend once they returned to the mainland.  I’m not sure if this is so much a love story as much as it’s a “I want to have sex with someone who I pay so they can’t ever say no” story.

The other story is a bit more interesting.  Julie Mars (Cyd Charisse, who I adore) is a dancer who walks with a cane.  It turns out that she and Roarke have been in love for years and the implication is that Roarke spent time with her off of the Island.  This is really a big deal.  It goes against everything that has always been implied about Roarke in the past.  Roarke never leaves the Island, that’s what we believed.  It turns out we were wrong.  He’s not only left the Island before but he’s fallen in love.  Julie’s fantasy is to be able to dance again.  Roarke grants her fantasy and Edmond Rome (Cesar Romero) wants to puts her in a show.  Roarke knows that the only way Julie can continue to dance is if she forgets the love that she has for Roarke.  That doesn’t quite make sense but Roarke just goes with it.  She leaves the Island, acting as if Roarke is just a friendly acquaintance as opposed to being the love of her life.

That was sad!  What made it especially sad is that Roarke doesn’t really have anyone to talk about all of this.  Tattoo was close enough to being an equal that Roarke could open up to him.  Lawrence is just a butler.  Some people confide in their butler.  Some people — as seen in this very episode — fall in love with their butler.  Roarke, however, is lost without Tattoo.

Poor Roarke!