All Hail Slade Craven! A Look At Turbulence 3: Heavy Metal

Posted on June 28, 2015 by Jedadiah Leland

Slade Craven, the hero of Turbulence 3

The first Turbulence was a 1997 box office flop that starred Lauren Holly as a flight attendant who must defeat Ray Liotta and land an airplane. Turbulence 2 was a 1999 direct-to-video release that starred Craig Sheffer as an engineer who must defeat a terrorist and land an airplane. 2001’s Turbulence 3 reuses the special effects footage from the first Turbulence and features Craig Sheffer in a different role but otherwise, it is a completely unrelated to the first two films. This time, John Mann plays a rock star who must defeat a terrorist and land an airplane.

Slade Craven is a death rocker who, with his white makeup and his long black hair, is an obvious stand-in for Marilyn Manson. Like Marilyn in his prime, Slade Craven is a controversial artist whose music is critical of religion. Unlike Marilyn Manson (whose video for Sweet Things Are Made Of This still has the power to shock), the one Slade Craven music video that we see mostly features Slade stumbling around a high school basement and petting a dog. Marilyn Manson sang about the beautiful people. Slade Craven’s biggest hit is Love Gun.

Slade Craven has announced his retirement. His final concert, complete with pyrotechnics and a working electric chair, will be held on an airplane, while the plane is flying from California to Canada. Only 40 of his most devoted fans will be allowed on the plane but “10 million people” will be watching via the miracle of the Internet. (Everything about the internet was still exotic in 2001.)

This is what a hacker looked like in 2001.

On the ground, hacker Nick Watts (Craig Sheffer) is illegally watching the concert when FBI agent Kate Hayden (Gabriella Anwar) shows up to arrest him. However, before Kate can put on the handcuffs, they notice that something strange is happening on the plane. Someone has just murdered the band’s manager and has locked Slade in the first class restroom. A man disguised to look like Slade shoots a co-pilot and announces that he’s going to crash the plane into a cursed cemetery in an area of East Kansas that is so unholy that “even the pope refuses to fly over it.” The crash will not only be seen by the 10 million people watching on the internet but it will also unleash Satan into the world.

With the help of Nick and Kate, Slade frees himself from his restraints and becomes a hilariously unlikely action hero. Not only does Slade have to defeat his doppelgänger and the other Satanists on the plane but, after the remaining pilot (Rutger Hauer!) is revealed to be a part of the conspiracy, Slade has to land the plane on his own. Luckily, Nick has an old NES flight simulator that he can use to help talk Slade down. “We’re all going to rock and roll!” Slade tells the passengers as he pulls on the throttle. Meanwhile, on the ground, Kate rewards Nick by handcuffing him and then walking towards the bedroom while unbuttoning her blouse. Nick hops after her.

Also, on the ground, Joe Mantegna plays an FBI agent. All of the scenes with Mantegna take place in two locations, suggesting that Mantegna filmed all of his scenes in a day or two. Turbulence 3 proves that it is impossible to hear Mantegna’s voice without picturing Fat Tony.

Of all the films about heavy metal singers fighting terrorists and landing airplanes, Turbulence 3 might be the best. All credit belongs to John Mann’s Slade Craven who rocks every day, parties every night, and beats up terrorists all of the time. Slade Craven proves the nobody saved the world like a shock rocker. Sadly, there has never been a Turbulence 4. I would love to see the further adventures of Slade Craven.

What if Peter Cushing Had Played The Doctor: A Look at Dr. Who And The Daleks

Posted on June 23, 2015 by Jedadiah Leland

When the long-running British science fiction show Doctor Who premiered over 50 years ago, it was originally envisioned as being a serialized educational program for children. Each serial would see The Doctor (William Hartnell), his granddaughter Susan (Carole Ann Ford), and teachers Ian (William Russell) and Barbara (Jacqueline Hill) traveling via TARDIS to a different historical period and interacting with real-life figure like Marco Polo and the Emperor Nero. The first serial, An Unearthly Child, featured the Doctor and his companions going back to prehistoric times and teaching cavemen how to make fire.

However, the show’s second serial forever changed the direction of the series. Written by Terry Nation, The Daleks introduced viewers to a race of militaristic aliens who, because they had nearly destroyed their planet in a nuclear war, could only exist inside of a tank-like shell. Devoid of all emotion except for hate, the Daleks were best known for their shrill battle cry of “EXTERMINATE!” Despite being defeated and apparently destroyed at the end of the serial, The Daleks returned to face the Doctor many times and the show itself shifted its focus away from teaching history lessons and instead became the show that we all know and love today.

At its height, the popularity of the Daleks rivaled that of the Doctor and his companions. In 1965, when Amicus Productions produced the first Doctor Who feature film, it was a no-brainer that it would feature the Daleks. With a few key changes (mostly to the character of the Doctor and his companions), Dr. Who and the Daleks recreates the plot of Terry Nation’s original serial. The Doctor (played by Peter Cushing), his granddaughters, Barbara (Jennie Linden) and Susan (Robert Tovey), and Barbara’s boyfriend Ian (Roy Castle) go to the planet Skaro, where they help the peace-loving Thals battle the war-obsessed Daleks.

Beyond selling the rights to the story, the BBC had nothing to do with the film’s production. Amicus obviously geared the film towards children, perhaps not understanding that, though Doctor Who may have started out as a kid’s show, the program itself had become much more adult as it grew in popularity. Hoping to make a film that could appeal to a wider (read: American) audience than the original TV show, Amicus changed a few key details. As a result, for fans of the original show, Dr. Who and the Daleks is a true oddity. It provides an alternative vision of what Doctor Who could have been.

One change that did work is that, at a time when Doctor Who was still being broadcast in black-and-white, Dr. Who and the Daleks was in color. Visually, the film has a pop art feel, full of primary color and featuring locations that feel like low-budget version of the villainous lairs that Ken Adam used to design for the James Bond films. This was the first time that the Daleks had been seen in Technicolor and the show even appropriated the film’s Dalek color-scheme when color episodes started to air in 1970.

Other changes do not work quite as well. The Daleks’ famous “EXTERMINATE” battle cry is never heard. The show’s beloved theme music has been replaced with an uninspired score from veteran Amicus composer Malcolm Lockyer. While the TARDIS still looks like a blue police box and is bigger on the inside than the outside, the sleek control console and the familiar grinding noise are both gone. Instead, the inside of the TARDIS is a cluttered mess of loose wires and flashing lights. The Doctor now has two granddaughters and, undoubtedly in order to appeal to children, Susan is much younger than she was in the television series. As well, in the television series, Ian was a science teacher who had no fear of standing up to The Doctor. The film’s Ian is clumsy and used mostly for broad comic relief.

The biggest change is to the character of the Doctor himself. For fans of the series, there is no bigger pet peeve than when unfamiliar critics refer to the main character as being “Dr. Who.” True fans know that the show’s title is a question and not a statement. No one knows the Doctor’s true name or his exact age. What they do know is that Doctor is a Time Lord from Gallifrey and that he stole his TARDIS. Whenever the Doctor’s body suffers too much damage, he regenerates into a new body (and a different actor).

Of course, in 1965, the Time Lords had yet to be officially introduced. The name “Gallifrey” had never been uttered on the television show. The Time Meddler, which was the first serial to introduce another member of the Doctor’s race, only aired a month before the release of Dr. Who and the Daleks. On the TV series, William Hartnell was still playing the First Doctor and it would be another two years before the character would regenerate for the first time. When Dr. Who and the Daleks was released, all that was known of the Doctor was that he was an alien and no one knew his true name.

Even those two facts are ignored in Dr. Who and the Daleks. Instead of being the abrasive alien that Hartnell played on the show, the film’s Doctor is portrayed as being a brilliant but absent-minded inventor who is very much a human being. The film also establishes early that his last name really is Who, with Ian regularly addressing him as “Dr. Who.” We never learn his first name. Maybe it was Larry.

Dr. Who was played by Peter Cushing, who Amicus felt would be a bigger box office draw than William Hartnell. Cushing does a good job playing his version of the character and it’s interesting to compare his kindly performance to both his better known work for Hammer and George Lucas and William Hartnell’s ruthless interpretation of the character. Cushing regularly goes back to save the life of Castle’s cowardly Ian. Hartnell would have just let him die.

Though the film bombed in North America (where, at the time, Doctor Who was still unknown) it did will enough in the UK to lead to a sequel, Daleks — Invasion Earth: 2150 A.D. When the sequel failed at the box office, plans for future movies starring Peter Cushing as the Doctor were abandoned. That was probably for the best. If the Amicus films had been a success, they could have changed the direction of Doctor Who just as surely as Terry Nation did when he first introduced the Daleks. Doctor Who could have reverted to being a show for children instead of becoming the show that it is today.

Still, it is hard not to wish that Peter Cushing could have gotten to play the Doctor in a “real” Doctor Who film. After all, Christopher Lee would have made a great Master.

In Memory of Ornette Coleman

Posted on June 12, 2015 by Jedadiah Leland

On Thursday morning, jazz legend Ornette Coleman died. He was 85.

My father loves jazz and I grew up listening to a soundtrack that included Miles Davis, Charlie Parker, John Coltrane, and Ornette Coleman. Out of all of them, Coleman was his favorite. As he would always say, no one else sounded like Ornette Coleman.

Ornette Coleman spent a lifetime reinventing both himself and jazz. A tireless innovator and a fearless experimenter, Ornette Coleman returned jazz to its improvisational roots. With his 1961 album Free Jazz: A Collective Improvisation, he not only popularized a new approach to jazz but gave it a name as well. As Coleman himself once said, “For me, being an innovator doesn’t mean being more intelligent, more rich, it’s not a word, it’s an action.”

Rest in peace, good gentleman.

The Measure of a Man: The Life and Career of Rocky Balboa

Posted on June 9, 2015 by Jedadiah Leland

Have you heard the rumor?

Rocky Balboa, also know as the Italian Stallion and the former heavyweight champion of the world, is going to die.

At least that is what some people think after reading the official plot synopsis of the upcoming boxing film Creed. Here is the press release from MGM and Warner Brothers:

From Warner Bros. Pictures and Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Pictures comes award-winning filmmaker Ryan Coogler’s “Creed.” The film explores a new chapter in the “Rocky” story and stars Academy Award nominee Sylvester Stallone in his iconic role. The film also reunites Coogler with his “Fruitvale Station” star Michael B. Jordan as the son of Apollo Creed.

Adonis Johnson (Jordan) never knew his famous father, world heavyweight champion Apollo Creed, who died before he was born. Still, there’s no denying that boxing is in his blood, so Adonis heads to Philadelphia, the site of Apollo Creed’s legendary match with a tough upstart named Rocky Balboa.

Once in the City of Brotherly Love, Adonis tracks Rocky (Stallone) down and asks him to be his trainer. Despite his insistence that he is out of the fight game for good, Rocky sees in Adonis the strength and determination he had known in Apollo—the fierce rival who became his closest friend. Agreeing to take him on, Rocky trains the young fighter, even as the former champ is battling an opponent more deadly than any he faced in the ring.

With Rocky in his corner, it isn’t long before Adonis gets his own shot at the title…but can he develop not only the drive but also the heart of a true fighter, in time to get into the ring?

Many have interpreted that to mean that, while training Adonis, Rocky will be battling cancer. With the exception of the first one and Rocky V, every installment in the Rocky franchise has featured a character either dying or coming close. Since Paulie will apparently not be appearing in Creed, that leaves Rocky himself as the most likely candidate to tragically pass away before or after the big fight. In death, Rocky would not only pass on his legacy Adonis Creed but Sylvester Stallone would pass on the Rocky franchise to Ryan Coogler and Michael B. Jordan.

With his days possibly numbered, I decided to take a look back at Rocky Balboa’s amazing career.

Rocky (1976)

Sylvester Stallone was just another out-of-work actor when, one night in 1975, he saw a little known boxer named Chuck Wepner go 15 rounds against the reigning heavyweight champion, Muhammad Ali. Inspired by the fight, Stallone wrote the first draft of Rocky in three days. When he sold his script, he did so with one condition: that he be allowed to play Rocky Balboa. You know the rest of the story: Directed by John G. Avildsen, Rocky became a huge box office hit, won the Oscar for best picture of the year, and made Sylvester Stallone into an unlikely star.

Rocky Balboa is an aging boxer and a collector for Philadelphia loan shark, Tony Gazzo (Joe Spinell). The current heavyweight champion, Apollo Creed (Carl Weathers), is scheduled to fight a match in Philadelphia in honor of America’s bicentennial. When his opponent injures his hand, Apollo decides to give a local boy a chance and the unknown Rocky gets a once-in-a-lifetime shot at the title. Nobody gives Rocky a chance, except for Rocky. With the help of grizzled trainer Mickey (Burgess Meredith) and alcoholic best friend, Paulie (Burt Young), Rocky prepares for the fight. After a training montage (the first of many) that ends with Rocky running up the steps of the Philadelphia Museum of Art, Rocky shocks everyone by going the distance against Apollo. Though he loses by a split decision, Rocky wins both his self-respect and the love of Paulie’s sister, Adrian (Talia Shire).

Rocky holds up as one of the best boxing movies ever made and it set the standard by which almost all future underdog sports movies have been judged. Rocky may have ended with Rocky ready to take off his gloves and concentrate on his life with Adrian but the box office demanded that Rocky get another once-in-a-lifetime shot.

Rocky II (1979)

The first Rocky may have ended with Apollo saying there would be no rematch and Rocky replying that he did not want one but the film’s box office success said otherwise. In Rocky II, Apollo is stung by criticism over how he nearly lost his first fight against Rocky and demands a rematch. At first, Rocky refuses but, with no prospects and a wife, son, and alcoholic brother-in-law to support, Rocky finally agrees to a rematch. What follows is largely a repeat of the first film, except this time Rocky has a lot more fans following him through the streets of Philadelphia during his training montage and Rocky actually wins the fight, becoming the heavyweight champion of the world.

The best thing about Rocky II is that it fleshes out the character of Apollo. No longer is he just the cocky villain from the first film. Instead, he is revealed to be a proud man, a fierce competitor, and a worthy opponent. Though he may lose the final fight, Apollo regains the respect that he sacrificed as the end of the first film.

Rocky II is also notable for being the first film in the franchise to be directed by Sylvester Stallone. Stallone would direct all of the subsequent installments, with the exception of the John G. Avildsen-directed Rocky V.

Rocky III (1982)

Rocky III has the best opening of the franchise. While Rocky does commercials and trades jokes with Kermit and Miss Piggy on The Muppet Show, Clubber Lang (Mr. T) relentlessly trains and savagely knocks out every opponent that he faces in the ring. The premise of the first two films has been reversed. Now, Rocky is the overconfident champion who does not take his latest fight seriously while Clubber Lang is the challenger who is hungry for victory. Clubber has the “eye of the tiger” and is determined to win. Rocky is busy doing charity events with Hulk Hogan and bailing alcoholic freeloader Paulie out of jail.

Rocky III features the first death of the franchise, when Clubber shoves Mickey so hard that Mickey ends up having a heart attack and dying almost immediately after Clubber defeats Rocky and becomes the new heavyweight champion of the world. As if Rocky needed another reason to demand a rematch, Mickey’s death makes it personal. Unfortunately, Rocky has lost his hunger. He no longer has the eye of the tiger.

Fortunately, Rocky’s former rival, Apollo Creed, is there to help him get it back. Taking over as Rocky’s trainer, Apollo gets the former champion back into fighting shape. This means that it is time for a training montage! This one ends with a great moment in bromance history as Rocky and Apollo embrace while jumping up and down in the ocean.

Rocky III ends with what may be the best fight in the history of the franchise. It is also the only fight to be shown straight from beginning to end, without jumping to future rounds. From the start of the fight, it is obvious that Clubber is stronger than Rocky but, taking a page from the rope-a-dope strategy that Muhammad Ali used on George Foreman in Zaire, Rocky knows that Clubber is so aggressive that he will tire himself out before the end of the fight. Once Clubber has exhausted himself, Rocky sends him down to the canvas.

At the end of the film, Rocky and Apollo square off one last time to see who is truly the best boxer. The film ends before the first punch is thrown and we never find out who won. I like to think that it was Apollo, if just because I know what is going to happen to him in Rocky IV.

Rocky IV (1985)

Having defeated every contender in the U.S., it only made sense that Rocky’s next opponent would come from the evil empire itself, the Soviet Union. But before Rocky could battle Ivan Drago (Dolph Lundgren), someone had to die. This installment’s sacrificial victim was none other than Apollo Creed. Apollo dies in the ring, beaten to death by the robotic Russian. Of all the deaths in the Rocky franchise, Apollo’s was the most shocking and the most traumatic. After Apollo falls face forward onto the mat, his body is still twitching even as Ivan says, “If he dies, he dies.”

Knowing that he should have been in the ring instead of Apollo, Rocky challenges Drago to a rematch, to be held in Moscow on, of all days, Christmas. Leaving behind his mansion, his son, and his robot (yes, Rocky owns a robot in this one), Rocky goes to Siberia and that means that it is time for a training montage! While Drago trains with machines and shoots steroids, Rocky trains by chopping wood and running in the snow.

It’s a tough fight. At first, Drago does not even seem to feel Rocky’s punches. The Soviet audience (including someone who looks a lot like Mikhail Gorbachev) chants Drago’s name. Just like in Philadelphia, Rocky refuses to go down. The crowd starts to chant Rocky’s name. When Drago’s manager demands that he win the fight in the name of communism, Drago shouts that he does not fight for the Soviet Union, he fights for himself. Finally, with seconds left in the final round, Rocky knocks Drago out.

As a bloody Drago looks on, Rocky literally wraps himself in an American flag and gives a speech. Rocky thanks the Americans and the Soviets for supporting him and then says, “”If I can change, and you can change, then everybody can change!” Gorbachev stands and applauds. Is it just a coincidence that, four years later, the Berlin Wall fell and the Cold War ended?

Rocky IV may be the best remembered of all of the Rocky films. Ivan Drago was Rocky’s greatest and most imposing opponent and it is not surprising that, despite killing Apollo, he still has a strong fan base. Unlike Clubber Lang, Ivan is a cold and methodical machine. Rocky’s improbable win over him is not just a victory for America but a victory for humanity as well.

Rocky V (1990)

Is Rocky V canonical? A lot of fans consider this to be the weakest film in the franchise. Despite writing the film’s screenplay, Sylvester Stallone reportedly hates Rocky V and ignored it when he made Rocky Balboa.

Rocky V starts with Rocky retiring after being told that his battle with Drago has left him with permanent brain damage. Paulie, proving once again that he’s the worst best friend that anyone could hope for, loses all of Rocky’s money. Rocky, Adrian, and Rocky, Jr. (now played by Sage Stallone) move back to the old neighborhood. Following in the footsteps of Mickey and Apollo, Rocky trains a mulletheaded young boxer named Tommy Gunn (Tommy Morrison). Instead of a training montage, we get a fight montage as Tommy becomes a champion but rejects Rocky’s management and signs with ~~Don King~~ George Washington Duke (Richard Gant). Tommy and Rocky eventually face off in a street fight. Originally, the plan was for Rocky to die at the end of the fight but, fortunately, someone in production realized that nobody would want to see Rocky Balboa beaten to death by Tommy Morrison.

Tommy Morrison was a real-life boxer. Rocky V was his only film role and he’s almost too convincing as the dim-witted Tommy Gunn. In the real world, Tommy Morrison was suspended from boxing in 1996 when he tested positive for HIV. He spent the rest of his life loudly insisting that the test was a false positive and trying to make a comeback. He was 44 years old when he died of AIDS in 2013.

Rocky V suffers because Tommy Gunn and George Washington Duke cannot begin to compare to great Rocky opponents like Clubber Lang and Ivan Drago. However, Rocky V does feature one of the franchise’s best endings. Rocky and Rocky, Jr. jog up the steps of the Philadelphia Museum of Art and, father and son together, they finally decide to enter the building and discover what’s inside.

Rocky Balboa (2006)

After the critical and box office failure of Rocky V, it seemed like Rocky Balboa had retired for good. However, after 16 years of well-deserved retirement, Rocky followed the path of George Foreman, Larry Holmes, and Riddick Bowe and decided to make a comeback.

As Rocky Balboa begins, Rocky is a widower and owns an Italian restaurant named Adrian’s, where he spends most of his time telling patrons stories about his fighting career. He is estranged from his son, who now wants to be called Robert and is played by Milo Ventimiglia, but Rocky still has his best friend Paulie. If not for Rocky, Paulie would probably be living in a cardboard box. After a computer simulation suggests that Rocky, in his prime, could have defeated the reigning heavyweight champion, Mason Dixon (Antonio Tarver), Rocky comes out of retirement for one last fight. With the help of Apollo’s former trainer, Duke (Tony Burton), Rocky proves that he can still go the distance, even though he ultimately loses the fight in a split decision.

At the start of the film, Adrian has been dead for four years. However, her ghost haunts the film. Rocky regularly visits her grave and the film ends with him at her grave and saying, one last time, “Yo Adrian, we did it.” Stallone may be the battered face of the Rocky franchise but Talia Shire was the heart. Though she’s only seen in flashback, Rocky Balboa is a tribute to the way that Talia Shire brought Adrian to life.

Sentimental and nostalgic, Rocky Balboa felt like the perfect way to end the franchise. However, Rocky will be returning for at least one more fight when Creed is released on November 25th.

In Praise of Mad Max: Fury Road’s Crazy Guitar Guy

Posted on May 19, 2015 by Jedadiah Leland

Mad Max: Fury Road opened this weekend and, taking in 45 million at the box office and maintaining an amazing 98% rating at Rotten Tomatoes, it has thrilled both critics and audiences. From George Miller’s breakneck direction to Charlize Theron’s performance as a one-armed warrior queen, there is much to praise about Mad Max: Fury Road. For many, though, the best part of the film is the “crazy guitar guy.”

If you have seen Max Max: Fury Road, you know exactly who I am talking about. He is the red jumpsuit-wearing, masked man who plays a mean guitar and wields a flamethrower at the same time. When the War Boys chase Furiousa and Max across the desert, he is a passenger on a massive truck. On the back of the truck, drummers pound away. On the front of truck, he dangles above a stack of speakers and amplifiers while playing a double-neck guitar that is also a flame thrower. Though he is known to many as simply being the crazy guitar guy, his character has a name. He is Coma, the Doof Warrior. In just one weekend, he has become a cult hero.

iOTA

The Doof Warrior is played by Australian musician and theatrical actor, iOTA (born Sean Hape). In an interview with Yahoo Movies, iOTA describes the Doof Warrior as being “a post-apocalyptic drummer boy.” From the drummer boys who played and often died on Civil War battlegrounds to the modern-day soldiers who blasted Rock the Casbah during the Invasion of Iraq, music and war have always gone together. The Doof Warrior’s heavy metal riffs are the perfect battle music for Mad Max‘s hyper-masculine War Boys.

Why, in a film full of crazy characters and exciting moments, has the Doof Warrior become so popular? The most obvious answer is that he looks cool and he has a flamethrower. However, another reason is that we know nothing about him. For all the attention that he has received, the Doof Warrior is only onscreen for a handful of minutes and he has no dialogue. Miller and iOTA worked out an elaborate backstory for the Doof Warrior but none of it is revealed in the movie. Much like Boba Fett in The Empire Strikes Back (and before the character was ruined with Attack of the Clones), the Doof Warrior remains an enigma who can be whatever we want or need him to be.

Beyond that, the Doof Warrior is living the fantasy of everyone who has ever played air guitar or spent hours debating whether James Hetfield or Kirk Hammett is the better guitarist. Anyone who has ever taken a guitar lesson has fantasized about watching an audience go mad while listening to his music. The War Boys may be going to war but the Doof Warrior is playing the greatest concert of his life. No wonder that, even when he is in the middle of a battle, the Doof Warrior never stops playing.

So, before his legacy is tarnished by bad fanfic and tumblr overexposure, let us take a minute to raise a glass to the coolest character in the coolest film of the year, the one and only Doof Warrior.

What If Aytekin Akkaya Played Captain America?

Posted on April 30, 2015 by Jedadiah Leland

Though he may be the most successful, Chris Evans is not the first actor to have played the role of Captain America. As befits a character that has been around since World War II, Cap has been played by several different actors over the years. Before Chris Evans and the character became a part of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, the role was played by Matt Salinger. Before Matt Salinger, there was Reb Brown. Before Reb Brown, there was Ayetkin Akkaya. Before Aytekin Akkaya, there was Dick Purcell and…

Wait! Aytekin who!?

Aytekin Akkaya is the actor who played Captain America in the Turkish film, 3 Dev Adam (also known as Three Mighty Men, Turkish Spider-man, and Turkish Captain America and Santo vs. Spider-Man). Produced in an alternative universe where there is no such thing as copyright law, 3 Dev Adam is perhaps the strangest Captain America film that you will ever see.

3 Dev Adam reminds me of the old Marvel series, What If? What If showed what would have been the result if certain events in Marvel continuity had happened differently. A typical issue would have a title like What If Ben Parker Had Not Died or What If Magneto Killed Professor Xavier or What If Rob Liefeld And Jim Lee Had Not Been Hired For Heroes Reborn? Regardless of the question, the answer was almost always that a hero would have turned into a villain and everyone would be dead by the end of the issue. 3 Dev Adam could have easily been called What If Spider-Man Was A Psychotic Serial Killer?

The film opens with a screaming woman being buried up to her neck in sand. An evil criminal demands information from her and, when he does not get it, he has her killed with a boat propeller. Who is this psycho? None other than your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man! However, this Spider-Man is not Peter Parker or Miles Morales. He is not even Ben Reilly. This Spider-Man is a serial killer who steals valuable antiques, sells them to collectors, and then buys them back with counterfeit money. He does not climb walls or listen to his spidey sense. Instead of shooting webs, he attacks with a switchblade. Instead of making jokes and worrying about Aunt May, this Spider-Man laughs and feeds one incompetent subordinate to a hungry gerbil. This Spider-Man has no Mary Jane Watson or Gwen Stacy in his life. Instead, he has a girlfriend named Nadia. When he has sex with her, they are watched by three laughing puppets.

Spider-Man has committed numerous murders in Istanbul. The police are powerless to stop him so the authorities ask for international help. The United States sends Captain America and his girlfriend Julia. Mexico sends famous wrestler Santo. When the three of them first show up at the Istanbul airport, a snippet of the score from Diamonds Are Forever is heard, reminding us that almost everything in this movie has been stolen.

There are some differences between the Captain that we all know and the Captain played by Aytekin Akkaya. Akkaya’s Captain America does wear a red, white, and blue costume but he does not carry a shield and his mask does not have wings on either side of his head. This Captain is trained in karate and has no trouble killing people. He also enjoys hanging out in strip clubs, which is something that you would never catch the MCU’s Cap doing. As far as personality is concerned, this Captain America has more in common with Robert Downey, Jr’s Iron Man than with the character played by Chris Evans.

Captain America and Santo’s strategy for stopping Spider-Man consists of standing around and waiting for Spider-Man and his goons show up. They then fight until Spider-Man either escapes or dies. It turns out that this Spider-Man does have one additional superpower. Whenever he dies, a new Spider-Man appears nearby and continues fighting. This leads to a climax where Cap kills Spidey in a number of gruesome ways, just to have a new Spider-Man materialize and laugh at him. By the end of the film, the screen is littered with dead Spider-Men.

3 Dev Adam is such a strange film that it is almost impossible to review. If you have ever wanted to see Captain America and Spider-Man fight to the death (over and over again), this is the film for you. As for Aytekin Akkaya, 3 Dev Adam was the only time that he ever played Captain America. But anyone who has seen 3 Dev Adam will never forget him.

Going Crazy With Sam Peckinpah and Max Evans

Posted on April 23, 2015 by Jedadiah Leland

At the beginning of The Wild Bunch, William Holden says, “If they move, kill them.” That line became so associated with director Sam Peckinpah and his films that it was even used as the title of his biography. Sam Peckinpah was known for both the violence of his films and the turmoil of his private life. He fought studios and film critics and directed six classic films before destroying himself and his talent with drugs and hard living. When he died in 1984, he was could not get a job in Hollywood but his legacy as a filmmaker has lived on.

In his memoir, Goin’ Crazy With Sam Peckinpah And All Our Friends, novelist Max Evans takes a look back at his long and often contentious friendship with Peckinpah. When Sam Peckinpah first met Max Evans, it was to buy the rights to Max’s western novel, The Hi-Lo Country. Though Peckinpah never made the movie, he and Evans remained friends for the rest of Peckinpah’s life. As Evans puts it, he and actor James Coburn were the only two to stay with Peckinpah until the very end.

When talking about Peckinpah, Evans does not pull any punches. Much of the book details Peckinpah’s casual cruelty. When Peckinpah’s son David wrote a script, Sam dismissed it as a “piece of shit.” Evans interviewed Peckinpah’s girlfriend, Katy Haber, about the time that Peckinpah hit her and how actor Steve McQueen reacted when he found out. Towards the end of his life, Peckinpah was told that he would die if he did not stop drinking. Sam gave up liquor and turned to cocaine instead. At one point, a paranoid Peckinpah even asked Evans for help in hiring a hitman to “take care of” a film producer that Peckinpah disliked.

Evans also talks about the other side of Sam Peckinpah. According to Evans, the Peckinpah that visited him in New Mexico was a different human being from the Sam who threatened producers and shot guns at actors. In Hollywood, Peckinpah felt had to prove he was a madman. With Max, he could just be “Ol’ Sam.” Max even suggests that Sam may have been a mystic and includes several stories about Sam’s “supernatural” abilities.

Along with writing about Sam Peckinpah, Evans also talks about his colorful encounters with actors like Lee Marvin, Burt Lancaster, L.Q. Jones, Woody Harrelson, and Sean Penn. Evans is a natural storyteller and Goin’ Crazy With Sam Peckinpah is an engaging and breezy trip through the Hollywood of the 60s and 70s.

Otis, Roscoe, and Roy Sullivan

Posted on April 8, 2015 by Jedadiah Leland

We lost three talented character actors this week.

Tom Towles (March 20, 1950–April 5, 2015) may have never been a household name but he was well-known to horror fans. In Rob Zombie’s House of a 1,000 Corpses, he played George Wydell, the gruff deputy who was executed by Karen Black’s Mama Firefly. In Tom Savini’s underrated remake of Night of the Living Dead, he took over the role of Harry Cooper and was executed by Patricia Tallman’s Barbara.

However, he was best known for playing the loathsome Otis in Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer. Taken under the wing of serial killer Henry (Michael Rooker), Otis is such an enthusiastic and depraved student that even Henry grows disgusted with him. Based on real-life murderer Ottis Toole, Otis is one of the most disgusting and plausible of movie psychos. Playing a stupid character, Towles gave a very intelligent performance.

Before being cast as Otis, Towles served in the Marines and was active in Chicago theater. He died in Florida, of a massive stroke.

James Best (July 26th, 1926–April 6th, 2015) played many different roles but he will always be best known as Sheriff Roscoe P. Coltrane of Hazzard County. Born in Kentucky, Best proudly served in World War II and started acting in 1950. For the first part of his career, he played cowboys, soldiers, outlaws, and sidekicks. In The Twilight Zone episode “The Last Rites of Jeff Myrtlebank,” he played a country boy who came back to life in the middle of his funeral. On The Andy Griffith Show, he played guitar player Jim Lindsey. He showed his versatility in films like Sam Fuller’s Shock Corridor and Max Baer’s Ode To Billy Joe.

Most people know him for his role on The Dukes of Hazzard. For 6 years, Best played Roscoe P. Coltrane and his performance has lived on and been rediscovered in endless syndicated reruns. Roscoe was forever in “hot pursuit,” chasing the Duke boys with his basset hound, Flash, sitting in the car beside him. Roscoe never came close to catching the Dukes but he never stopped trying. There was nothing subtle about Best’s performance but it was perfect for The Dukes of Hazzard.

James Best was also a painter and a respected acting coach, as well as an early mentor to Quentin Tarantino. He passed away at the age of 88 from pneumonia.

Geoffrey Lewis (July 31st, 1935–April 7th, 2015) began his career in 1970 and, at the time of his passing, he had over 200 credited roles to his name. With a face that could either be friendly or threatening depending on how it was lit, Lewis played truck drivers and senators, criminals and lawyers, good old boys and corporate businessmen. Lewis was the epitome of a character actor, never quite a star but making even the smallest of roles memorable.

He was a favorite of Clint Eastwood’s and appeared in seven films with him. In Every Which Way But Loose and Any Which Way You Can, he played Orville and stole scenes from not only Clint Eastwood and Ruth Gordon but from Clyde the Orangutan as well. More recently, he brought tragic dignity to the role of Roy Sullivan in Rob Zombie’s The Devil’s Rejects.

Rest in peace, good gentlemen.

America, Tommy Wiseau, and Rifftrax

Posted on April 3, 2015 by Jedadiah Leland

“America is the best country in the world.” — Tommy Wiseau

Tommy Wiseau in The Room

Recently, I had the chance to speak with Tommy Wiseau, the director of the cult hit, The Room and the man behind the online series, The Neighbors.

In a perfect world, everyone would get to spend 30 minutes talking to Tommy Wiseau. For someone who has watched The Room over a hundred times, it was at first overwhelming to hear that famous accent and that equally famous chuckle over the telephone. Once you start talking to Tommy, it is hard not to get caught up in his energy and his enthusiasm.

During our conversation, Tommy frequently returned to the theme that, as he put it, “America is the best country in the world.” Both The Room and Tommy Wiseau are American success stories. Along with writing and directing The Room, Wiseau also starred as Johnny, a banker who lives with and loves his “future wife” Lisa (Juliette Danielle). What he does not know is that Lisa is having an affair with Johnny’s best friend, Mark (Greg Sestero). Meanwhile, Johnny’s ward, Denny, is stalked by a drug dealer, Lisa’s friend tries to find enough privacy to make out with her boyfriend, a guy that nobody has seen before suddenly shows up towards the end of the film and somehow knows about everything that has been going on, Mark nearly tosses a man off a rooftop, and Johnny and his friends spend a lot of time playing football while wearing tuxedos.

Juliette Danielle, Tommy Wiseau, and Greg Sestero in The Room

When The Room was first released in 2003, it played in two theaters and it easily could have gone the way of many other forgotten independent films. However, through word of mouth, people started to discover The Room and now, in the tradition of The Rocky Horror Picture Show, The Room has become a midnight movie success. Fans come to showings dressed like their favorite characters, repeat the film’s dialogue, talk back to the characters, and throw plastic spoons at the screen. (Go to a showing and you will understand.) Co-star Greg Sestero has written a book, The Disaster Artist, about the making of The Room. (When I asked Wiseau how accurate he felt the book was, he replied, “40%, no more than that.” He also told me that, despite what some people in the media may be claiming, reports that he was no longer talking to Greg Sestero were totally incorrect.) I was first introduced to The Room by Lisa Marie (not to be mistaken for Lisa, Johnny’s future wife) and we have both lost track of how many midnight showing we have attended at the Inwood Theater.

As The Room has become better known, so has Tommy Wiseau. When I asked him if he found all of the fame to be overwhelming, Wiseau told me, “Not overwhelming. Because it’s fun. You have to believe in what you want to create.”

Wiseau has another reason to be excited, because the guys from Rifftrax will soon be bringing The Room to a whole new audience. Rifftrax will be hosting a showing and live commentary at the Tribeca Film Festival on April 17th and then Rifftrax Live: The Room will screen in 700 theaters across the United States and Canada on May 6th and May 12th.

The Rifftrax guys are Mike Nelson, Bill Corbett, and Kevin Murphy. They are probably best known for their previous work on Mystery Science Theater 3000. In many ways, MST 3K is as much of an American success story as The Room. If you grew up in the 90s, it is likely that MST 3K shaped the way that you viewed everything from culture to politics to entertainment to whether or not it was okay to talk during a movie. Rifftrax presenting The Room feels like the perfect marriage of two phenomenons of American pop culture.

Joe Don Baker in happier times

There are a few famous stories of actors and filmmakers who did not appreciate having their films screened by the MST 3K guys. On the DVD for MST 3K‘s take on Time Chasers, Mike Nelson mentions that the film’s producers had a party to view the show and that some of them did not take the ribbing as well as others. The internet is full of rumors that actor Joe Don Baker is still angry over what was said about his performances in Mitchell and Fatal Justice.

However, Tommy Wiseau is encouraging everyone to see Rifftrax Live: The Room. When I asked him how he felt about Rifftrax, he replied, “They’re very nice people.” He went on to explain that he’s very excited and enthusiastic about the Rifftrax presentation of The Room and he’s looking forward to a whole new audience discovering the film.

Tommy Wiseau and football in The Room

Wiseau is also hoping that people will continue to discover The Neighbors, his online series that is currently available on Hulu. When I asked him what had inspired The Neighbors, he replied that it was based on a true life. In regard to one character who is obsessed with a chicken, Wiseau explained, “My aunt used to have a chicken.” He went on to explain that, like the characters in The Neighbors, “We are all human, we are all multicultural.”

We also talked about Wiseau’s first film, the documentary Homeless in America. Tommy Wiseau really impressed me with the obvious passion that he felt for the topic. “I wanted to know about what was happening,” he explained as to why he had made the documentary, adding that not all of the homeless are mentally ill and they not all of them are criminals. “You cannot eliminate the homeless,” he said. Homeless in America can be ordered from Amazon.

Orson Welles in Citizen Kane

When asked what movies he would recommend that aspiring filmmakers should watch, Wiseau immediately said, “Citizen Kane.” “Citizen Kane isn’t cookie cutter from Hollywood,” he explained. “If Hollywood had made The Room, it would be a totally different story.” Tommy also suggested watching Giant and “Clint Eastwood movies.”

As for the future, James Franco is currently working on an adaptation of Sestero’s The Disaster Artist but Wiseau can not talk about the production. However, he did say about Franco, “He likes James Dean, I like James Dean.” Wiseau is looking forward to more filmmaking. He’s currently working on a new film called Foreclosure and, in June, there will be four more episodes of The Neighbors on Hulu.

And, of course, Rifftrax Live: The Room will be in 700 theaters on May 6th and May 12th.

I asked Wiseau if there was anything he would like to say to his fans.

“Yes,” he said, “You can laugh, you can cry, you can express yourself, but please don’t hurt each other.”

Those are words to live by.

Want to find out more about The Room and buy some Tommy Wiseau merchandise? Click here!

Want to find out more about the showing of The Room at Tribeca and how to purchase tickets? Click here!

Want to find out more about how to purchase tickets for the May 6th and May 12th showings of Rifftrax Live: The Room? Click here!

Want to watch Tommy Wiseau’s The Neighbors? Click here!

Want to order Tommy Wiseau’s documentary, Homeless in America? Click here!