Daily Archives: June 24, 2025

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 2.8 “Undercover”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network!  It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week, Chris goes undercover.

Episode 2.8 “Undercover”

(Dir by Terrence H. Winkless, originally aired on October 13th, 1996)

A smarmy detective wants Chris to go undercover to help investigate a suspected money launderer, Tim Wakefield (Scott Plank).  Palermo argues that Chris doesn’t have enough experience to work undercover but the detective asks Chris, “What do you want to do?  You ready to get out of those bicycle shorts and do some real police work?”

I have to admit that line cracked me up.  It really made the whole episode.  Palermo got offended, as he always does whenever anyone points out that bike cops look silly with their shorts and their crisp white shirts.  What was great about the line was that it was true.  The detective may have been smarmy but he was right about Chris being invited to do “real police work” and he was right about bike cops not being real policemen.  Everyone know it’s true!  Seriously, if a bicycle cop ever tries to pull you over, just slam down on the accelerator.  What are they going to do?  Chase you when you’re going over 30 mph?  I think not!

(Seriously, two seasons in and the show is still trying to convince us that bike cops are real cops.  Sorry, Palermo, it’s not going to happen!)

That said, this episode’s main plot still ended up falling flat because Chris is not a very interesting character and her whole undercover thing wasn’t particularly credible.  When she went undercover, she still came across as being just as stiff, humorless, and unlikable as when she’s riding her bike and threatening people with arrest.  Tim Wakefield, of course, fell for her and Chris was supposed to be attracted to him and conflicted about her assignment and I never bought it for a second.

(As for Wakefield, he turned out to be not as bad of a guy as everyone assumed.  He was arrested but his lawyer got him off and the episode ended with him sending Chris a postcard from some tropical beach.  I think Chris was supposed to be wistful as she looked at the postcard but, since Darlene Vogel was apparently only capable of one facial expression, who knows for sure?)

Meanwhile, Cory dealt with being stalked by a mentally unstable ex-boyfriend,  Wasn’t it just last week that Cory’s partner was being stalked by a mentally unstable woman?  This show certainly does enjoy repeating itself.  While Palermo worried about Chris, TC and Victor chased some roller-blading teens who were shooting random tourists with paintballs.  The roller-blading scenes were kind of exciting but, unfortunately, they had to share space with all of the awkward bicycle scenes.

This episode had its moments.  The roller-blading was cool.  The detective making fun of Palermo was gratifying.  Overall, though, the fact that the show centers around bicycles continues to be a flaw that simply cannot be overcome.  There’s simply no way to make anyone riding a bicycle look impressive, I don’t care how serious they try to look.

Sorry, Pacific Blue.

Brad’s “Birthday of the Day” – Actor Joe Penny!

Posted on by Bradley Crain

Joe Penny turns 69 years old today! That may not mean that much to a lot of people, but I like Joe Penny so I’m making a point to show the guy some appreciation. As a teenager in the 1980’s, I remember Joe in two T.V. series that our family really enjoyed, RIPTIDE and JAKE AND THE FATMAN. I haven’t watched an episode of either show in a long time, but they were part of my growing up years, so they are seared into my brain. But the main reason that Joe has become part of my family is the fact that he played Charles Bronson’s police detective son, Ben Fein, in the second and third installments of the “Family of Cops” series of T.V. movies. Daniel Baldwin may have originated the role of Ben Fein in the first movie, and he’s good in the part, but I felt Joe Penny was a step in a positive direction when he took over in the second film. His acting style suits the series better than Baldwin’s, and I also think he’s more believable as Bronson’s son. I still revisit the “Family of Cops” series every couple of years, and I’m always happy to hear Joe refer to Bronson as “Pop.”

Happy Birthday, Joe! I hope it’s a great one! I’ve included the trailer for BREACH OF FAITH: A FAMILY OF COPS II below:

Desert Phantom (1936, directed by S. Roy Luby)

Posted on by Jedadiah Leland

In a frontier town, rancher Jean Halloran (Sheila Bromley) has a big problem.  Someone is shooting and killing all of her ranch hands and sending her notes in which he tells her to give up her ranch and leave town.  When an ammunition salesman and trick shooter named Billy Donavon (Johnny Mack Brown), Jean hires him to serve as a bodyguard and to track down the mysterious Phantom.  Billy, however, has a secret of his own.

Desert Phantom is a remake of an old Harry Carey film.  I don’t know why Poverty Row did remakes since all of their films pretty much had the same plot regardless.  A stranger comes into town and gets involved with a female rancher and a bad guy who is trying to hide his actual identity.  In this one, Nelson McDowell gets to supply the comic relief as a befuddled veterinarian while familiar faces like Ted Adams and Karl Hackett are there to keep us guessing about how the Phantom could actually be.  If you’ve watched enough of these movies, though, you’ll always be able to guess who the bad guy is.

This isn’t the best of Johnny Mack Brown’s movies.  The Phantom’s story seems like it could have been interesting but that would have meant taking more risks than most of the Poverty Row studios were willing to do.  Johnny Mack Brown is as convincing a cowboy as always and is the film’s saving grace.  Brown was a western star precisely because he could make even something like Desert Phantom watchable.

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 6.20 “What’s The Matter With Kids/Island of Horror”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984.  Unfortunately, the show has been removed from most streaming sites.  Fortunately, I’ve got nearly every episode on my DVR.

This week, it’s zombie time!

Episode 6.20 “What’s The Matter With Kids/Island of Horror”

(Dir by Don Weis, originally aired on April 16th, 1983)

Dr. Stuart Wharton (Steve Allen) is a tightass stick-in-the-mud who has come to Fantasy Island to give a lecture on how to raise the perfect child.  His wife, Margaret (Jayne Meadows Allen), is sick of Dr. Wharton telling people how to live their lives and basically threatens to leave his condescending ass if he doesn’t allow her to adopt Andy (Justin Henry), who is not perfect but who is still better than any of the imaginary perfect children that Dr. Wharton has written and lectured about.  This fantasy was predictable and kind of boring.  Jayne Meadows Allen actually wrote the script so it’s interesting that the whole fantasy is basically her telling off her husband and accusing him of being a pompous jackass.

There is one interesting scene where Mr. Roarke talks about Stuart’s idea of the perfect child and the kid suddenly appears out of thin air.  Mr. Roarke also makes the kid disappear.  Mr. Roarke is all-powerful!

(So, you may be wondering, why Roarke doesn’t just use his God-like powers in every episode?  I think he wants his guests to sometimes lean a lesson on their own.  I always hate it when people try to make me learn something.  Sorry, Roarke.)

Meanwhile Erica Nelson (Gayle Hunnicutt) goes to a neighboring island in search of her missing fiancé, Dr. Richard Yates (Christopher Connelly).  Uh-oh!  The Island’s controlled by a mad scientist named Dr. Christophe (Jared Martin)!  And Dr. Christophe is into voodoo!

That’s right, there are zombies all over the place!  And one of the zombies is Erica’s husband!  Fortunately, it turns out that zombification is not a permanent condition and Erica is eventually able to cure her husband while the remaining zombies descend upon Dr. Christophe.

I liked this fantasy.  The island was atmospheric and, by Fantasy Island standards, the zombies were actually pretty effective.  The scene of them rising from their graves was surprisingly well-done and I also appreciated that Jared Martin totally embraced the melodrama in the role of Dr. Christophe.  This fantasy also featured a great moment where Roarke appeared on the Island to inform Erica that the zombies were coming and then he promptly vanished.  I love it when Roarke does that

(Of course, I don’t think that Erica was ever in any real danger.  I mean, this episode established that Roarke can conjure people out of thin air.  I’m sure he could have just snapped his fingers and made all the zombies vanish.  But, in typical Roarke fashion, he wanted Erica to learn a lesson.)

The orphan fantasy was annoying but I like zombies!  This was a good trip to the Island.

The Hong Kong Film Corner – WE’RE GOING TO EAT YOU (1980), directed by Tsui Hark! 

Posted on by Bradley Crain

WE’RE GOING TO EAT YOU (1980) is the story of Agent 999 (Norman Chu), an agent of the Central Surveillance Agency, who has come to a remote island to catch a notorious criminal who goes by the name of Rolex (Melvin Wong). Once he gets there, he discovers that the island is overrun by crazed cannibals and is ruled over with an iron fist by a power mad Chief (Eddy Ko). Chief hoards the human meat of unsuspecting travelers who happen upon the island for himself and his soldiers, leaving the villagers at the point of starvation. As Agent 999 continues his investigation and tries to avoid becoming lunch, he finds out that the repentant criminal Rolex has become the Chief’s aid in order to expose the evils of the island to the authorities on the mainland without having to go back to jail himself. When Rolex’s plans don’t work out, Agent 999 must then team up with a goofy thief (Hon Kwok-Choi) to fight off the cannibals, save his newfound love (Michelle Kim), and get the hell off of the island in one piece!

The second film to be directed by Hong Kong icon Tsui Hark, WE’RE GOING TO EAT YOU is a wild hybrid of a film that leans heavily into horror, comedy and martial arts. It’s a rather odd mix that contains jarring shifts in tone, a staple of Hong Kong Cinema of the 80’s. One minute we’re watching men have their arms cut off and their guts ripped out, only to immediately shift to slapstick rape humor, before shifting to badass martial arts / roller skating kung fu action choreographed by a young Corey Yuen. Completely unpolished in terms of production values, it’s nonetheless acquired somewhat of a cult classic status due to its raw energy, gory subject matter, directorial pedigree, and anti-communist political themes. I thought Norman Chu was good as Agent 999, even if his charismatic agent isn’t always as observant as we’d hope he’d be. Eddy Ko, who is in one of my favorite Hong Kong films THE MISSION (1999), can be both menacing and goofy as the Chief who will pretty much do anything to preserve his power and supply of meat. The island village puts off its own scary vibes with its creepy slaughterhouse and masked cannibals, always at the ready to hack off a body part. It all adds up to a rather unique viewing experience. 

While WE’RE GOING TO EAT YOU is certainly not for everyone due to its subject matter, those who appreciate the frenetic action of Hong Kong cinema will enjoy this film. It will also fit the bill for those who like kung fu action mashups served with sides of gory gore and silly giggles. Just don’t expect it to have the polished look of Hark’s later films such as PEKING OPERA BLUES (1986) and ONCE UPON A TIME IN CHINA (1991). 

Song of the Day: The Pine-Tarred Bat or the Ballad of George Brett by Red River Dave McEnery

Posted on by Dazzling Erin

Today’s song of the day is based on an actual incident.

In 1983, The Royals and the Yankees were playing in Yankee Stadium.  At the top of the Ninth Inning, the score was 4-3, Yankees.  With two outs, the Royals’ George Brett hit a two-run home run to give his team the lead.  However, Yankees manager Billy Martin protested that Brett had too much pine tar on his bat.  When the umpires demanded to see the bat, Royals pitcher Gaylord Perry gave the bat to a batboy and told him to hide it.  When they finally did manage to find the bat, the umpires agreed with Martin, nullifying the homerun and calling Brett out.  Because Brett was the third out, this gave the Yankees the victory.  An understandably angry Brett attempted to confront umpire Tim McClelland about the ruling but was physically restrained by his teammates.

The Royals protested the game and the American League President, Lee MacPhail, upheld their protest, saying that pine tar did not give a batter an unfair advantage.  25 days later, the Yankee and the Royals met and resumed the game in a nearly deserted stadium.  The Royals won 5-4.  As for the bat itself, it now resides in the Baseball Hall of Fame.

The Pine Tar Incident inspired today’s song of the day, The Pine-Tarred Bat or The Ballad of George Brett, written and performed by “Red River” Dave McEnery.

A Scene That I Love: Robocop Comes Home

Posted on by Dazzling Erin

Today is the birthday of Peter Weller, the actor best-known for playing the original Robocop in 1987.  Robocop is best-known for being violent and satirical but it also features one of the saddest scenes that I’ve ever seen.

Trying to piece together who he was before he was rebuilt, Robocop visits his former home and has flashbacks to his past life as Officer Murphy.  The house is empty now but the flashbacks show that it was once full of life.  Even with only half of his face visible, Weller shows Murphy’s loneliness as he walks around the house that he once called home.

4 Shots From 4 Films: Visions of the Future

Posted on by Dazzling Erin

4 Or More Shots From 4 Or More Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!

Who can see the future?

4 Shots From 4 Futuristic Films

Metropolis (1927, Dir. by Fritz Lang)

The Terminator (1984, Dir. by James Cameron)

Star Trek (2009, Dir. by JJ Abrams)

Prometheus (2012, Dir by Ridley Scott)

Music Video Of The Day: Somewhere Over Lardeo by Lainey Wilson (2025, Dir. by TK McKamey)

Posted on by Dazzling Erin

Lainey Wilson may be heading out west to Southern California in this video but her heart, her mind, and her imagination still rest with that one rodeo rider in Laredo.  The song’s a short story and the video is a visually stunning interpretation of love and regret.

I liked this video.

Enjoy!