Late Night Retro Television Reviews: Monsters 1.8 “Sleeping Dragons”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing Monsters, which aired in syndication from 1988 to 1991. The entire show is streaming on Tubi.

This week, the lizard are leaping!

Episode 1.8 “Sleeping Dragon”

(Dir by Mark Rezyka, originally aired on December 10th, 1988)

Outside of Reno, Nevada, a stone capsule is found.  Professor Merrick (Kin Shriner) believes that the capsule is from the prehistoric era and that it might prove his theory that there was a highly-developed society on Earth before the rise of human beings.  Merrick brings the capsule to a lab that is located high in the mountains.

While a snow storm rages outside, Merrick and his colleagues, Jeffrey (Russell Johnson) and Jeffrey’s daughter Lisa (Beth Toussaint), examine the capsule.  Jeffrey is skeptical of Merrick’s theories while Lisa thinks that the rock could actually be some sort of time capsule that was buried centuries ago.  When the three of them leave the lab to get a Geiger counter and some more tools to try to pry the capsule open, a humanoid lizard (Wayne Toth) emerges from the stone.

The Lizard is not a friendly visitor and soon, he’s attacking anyone foolish enough to get close to him.  The surviving humans know that he have to find a way to stop the lizard but how do you stop something that you can’t understand?  With the blizzard raging outside, no one is leaving the lab until the battle between lizard and human is resolved.

This episode of Monsters had potential but it suffered because of its short runtime.  If the episode had a bit more time to emphasis the claustrophobia of the lab and to also allow a bit more suspense as the Lizard tracked down the scientists, it would have been far more effective.  As it is, the whole thing felt a bit rushed.

There are two things that I did like about this episode.

First off, it’s a huge plot point that the lab’s phone is dead, which means that the scientists can’t call for help.  The scientists assume that the phone is dead either because of the blizzard or because of the Lizard but, in reality, the phone isn’t dead at all.  It’s just that Lisa, while stumbling around the office, accidentally unplugged the phone and no one noticed until they actually tried to make a call.  That felt like a realistic mistake that one might make while under pressure and it also encouraged the viewer to question whether or not the humans were actually smart enough to survive their lizard encounter.

The second thing that worked about this episode is that lizard man really was frightening.  It helped that he stayed in the shadows for most of the episode and, when he did appeared, he moved quickly enough that you really didn’t notice that he was essentially a guy in a rubber suit.  He was an effective monster and, in the end, that’s what really matters when it comes to a show like this.

Next week, we’ve got another vampire story!

Retro Television Reviews: The Love Boat 3.17 “April’s Love/We Three/Happy Ending”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986!  The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

This week, a special guest returns!

Episode 3.17 “April’s Love/We Three/Happy Ending”

(Dir by George Tyne, originally aired on January 12th, 1980)

Let’s see.  This week’s episode is entitled April’s Love/We Three/Happy Ending and….

Wait?

Whose love?

April?

Oh no (or oh yes, depending on how you view things), it’s a Charo episode!

Charo was hardly the only celebrity to frequently appear on The Love Boat but she was the only one to always play the same character.  April first boarded the ship as a stowaway and then she returned as an entertainer.  She appeared at least once in almost every season.  In many ways, Charo was the perfect fit for The Love Boat.  She was loud, flamboyant, and shameless.  She was sexy but innocent.  She was the epitome of The Love Boat aesthetic.  At the same time, a little Charo went a long way and, whenever she boarded the ship, you knew the episode was pretty much going to be 75% Charo.

That’s the case here, in which the crew makes such a big deal over April that you have to wonder if they’re aware that there are other passengers on board.  April boards the ship with her manager and fiancé, Honest Tex (Forrest Tucker).  The crew doesn’t trust Honest Tex, especially when they find out that he was a used car salesman before he met April.  When Honest Tex hears Julie playing her flute and offers to get her a recording contract, the crew assumes that he wants to cheat on April!

(Side note: Since when did Julie start playing the flute?)

Fortunately, Honest Tex turns out to be sincere and he really does have a heart as big as Texas.  After April tells him what the crew has been saying about him, Honest Tex admits that he has been lying about something.  He was actually born in New Jersey.  April sings a song, the crew apologizes, and April and Honest Tex leave the boat a happy couple.

While this is going on, William and Betty Robinson (Don Adams and Juliet Mills) board the boat so they can get some work done.  They are married screenwriters but they are on the verge of divorce.  Once they finish their current script, they can split up.  The only problem is that William doesn’t want to split up with her.  Isaac suggests that William just never finish the script.  William hides the script in his nightstand and then, saying that it’s been lost, he works with Betty to write a new script in which a couple stays together.  Betty and William realize that they still love each other.  Betty discovers that William hid the script but she then confesses that she had another copy of the original script the whole time.  Awwwwwww!  This was a cute story.  Don Adams was a lot more likable here than he is on Check It Out! and Juliet Mills is a lot less annoying than her sister Hayley.

(Admittedly, I really only know Hayley from her time as Miss Bliss on those weird episodes of Saved By The Bell.  But seriously, Miss Bliss was the worst!)

Finally, Tom Thornton (Ross Martin) boards the boat and is surprised to see his ex-girlfriend, Martha (Marjorie Lord), and Martha’s adopted daughter, Laura Rogers (Laurie Walters).  Laura happens to be Tom’s daughter!  Tom isn’t sure whether or not he should reveal he is Laura’s father but meeting Vicki and hearing about how happy Vicki was when she discover Captain Stubing was her father leads to Tom telling Laura the truth.  Laura is happy to have a father and Martha is happy to reunite with Tom.  This was another sweet story, featuring sincere performances from both Ross Martin and Marjorie Lord.  (Plus, Vicki finally did something to justify breaking all of the labor laws that are undoubtedly being violated by having a 12 year-old working on a cruise ship.)

This episode featured two sweet and sincerely-acted stories but both of them are overshadowed by April and Honest Tex.  Personally, I think April is an amusing character and, as I said, Charo was the epitome of the ideal Love Boat celebrity guest.  But it’s still hard not to feel that the other passengers deserved just as much attention as Charo received in this episode.  That said, this was still an enjoyable cruise.  A good time was had by all.  I know Charo will return in future episodes but I have a feeling we’ll never hear from Honest Tex again.