Lt. Joe Bookman is a cop.  He works for the New York Public Library, helping to track down delinquents who vandalize books and fail to pay their late fees.  Yes, the library cop is named Bookman but he has already heard all the jokes.

1971.  That was Bookman’s first year on the job.  Bad year for libraries.  Bad year for America.  Hippies burning library cards.  Abbie Hoffman telling everyone to steal books.  Bookman doesn’t judge a man by the length of his hair or the type of music that he listens to.  Rock and roll was never his bag.  But he’ll make sure you put on a pair of shoes before you step into the New York Public Library, fella!

You know that little stamp, the one that says “New York Public Library?”  That may not mean anything to you but it means a lot to Joe Bookman.   One whole hell of a lot.  Why would Bookman make such a big stink over old library books?  Here’s a hint, junior.  Maybe we can live without libraries, people like you and me.  Sure, we’re too old to change the world.  But what about that kid, sitting down, opening a book, right now, in a branch at the local library and finding drawings of pee pees and wee wees on The Cat In The Hat and The Five Chinese Brothers?  Doesn’t he deserve better?

Of the many odd characters who appeared on the sitcom Seinfeld, Joe Bookman (played by Philip Baker Hall) remains one of the most popular.  Unlike Kramer’s lawyer Jackie Chiles or Larry David’s impersonation of George Steinbrenner, Mr. Bookman only appeared in two episodes.  He had a cameo in the series finale and, before that, he appeared in the third season episode, The Library.  The scene where Bookman mercilessly grills Jerry Seinfeld about whether or not Seinfeld returned Tropic of Cancer is a classic, with Hall playing the dogged library cop like a modern-day Inspector Javert and Seinfeld obviously struggling not to laugh.

Seinfeld was famously described as being a show about nothing.  What set Lt. Bookman apart from the show’s regular characters was that he believed in something.  Joe Bookman believed in the sanctity of the New York Public Library.  He was an old-fashioned man with a code of honor, the type of man who take a bullet to save a book.

When he first appeared in 1991, Bookman was already angry about the way the world was changing around him.  He is probably even less happy today.  Where is Joe Bookman right now?  Maybe he’s retired and sitting on a beach, drinking a piña colada and reading Henry Miller.  Maybe.  But I like to believe that he is still on the job, collecting fines and searching for overdue books.

Whatever Bookman is doing now, he will always be there in syndication, reminding us to put our shoes on before stepping into the library and to return our books on time.