Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 3.3 “Killshot”

Posted on October 14, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989. The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, another friend of Crockett’s is in trouble!

Episode 3.3 “Killshot”

(Dir by Leon Ichaso, originally aired on October 10th, 1986)

Crockett and Tubbs are working undercover as Burnett and Cooper to take down drug lord Morales (Roger Pretto). Morales is one of the most powerful drug lords in Miami but he’s still not connected enough to know that Burnett and Cooper are undercover cops. I know that I bring this up nearly every time I write about this show but it just baffles me that Crockett and Tubbs are somehow still able to maintain their covers despite the fact that those covers have gotten blown in numerous episodes and Crockett makes no effort to act any differently when he’s pretending to be Burnett. At least Tubbs uses his fake Jamaican accent whenever he’s pretending to be Cooper. Crockett doesn’t even bother to change his suit before pretending to be Burnett.

That said, they’ve somehow managed to keep Morales from discovering that they’re cops. So, Morales instead focuses on manipulating a customs agent, Frank Ariolla (Carlos Cestero). Frank’s brother, Tico (Fernando Allende) is an up-and-coming jai alai player. (That’s the sport, prominently featured in Miami Vice‘s opening credits, in which the players use a wicker to both catch and launch a ball.) However, Tico also has a raging cocaine problem. In fact, the drug often leaves him impotent. When a prostitute suggests that Tico might not be attracted tp women, Tico goes crazy and blacks out. When he wakes up, the prostitute appears to be dead and madam Isabel Batista (Maria Duval) says she’ll protect Tico for a price. Frank has to work as a double agent or Isabel and Morales will send a tape of Tico attacking the prostitute to the police.

(For the record, the prostitute was only pretending to be dead as a part of a plot to frame Tico. But then Isabel had her killed for real.)

Trying to protect his brother, Frank agrees to work for Morales. But when a guilt-stricken Tico makes a mistake during a match that leads to him getting killed when he’s stuck in the head by the ja alai ball, will Crockett and Tubbs be able to stop Frank from taking his own violent vengeance on both Morales and Isabel? As you probably already guessed, this is yet another Miami Vice episode the ends with a freeze frame and an off-screen gunshot as Crockett yells, “No!”

If there’s one thing that has stayed consistent over the first three seasons of Miami Vice, it’s that it does not pay to be a friend of Sonny’s. From Jimmy Smits getting blown up in the pilot to Ira Stone dying last week to Frank throwing his life away to avenge his brother in this week’s episode, anyone who has ever been close to Crockett seems to end up having terrible luck. I’m stunned that Tubbs has managed to survive for as long as he has.

As for this episode, Crockett and Tubbs both seemed to be sidelined in favor of the story of Frank and Tico. It’s always weird when Crockett and Tubbs become supporting characters on their own show. Carlos Cestero and Maria Duval both gave good performances, which is good because it helps to distract from the fact that Morales is a fairly dull villain and Tico is not a particularly compelling character. For the most part, this episode works best as a commercial for ja alai, which looks a hundred times more exciting than most sports. Certainly, its fast action and the constant danger of sudden death makes it the ideal sport for Miami.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 3.2 “Stone’s War”

Posted on October 7, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, another friend of Sonny’s gets killed.

Episode 3.2 “Stone’s War”

(Dir by David Jackson, originally aired on October 3rd, 1986)

Sonny Crockett’s old friend, journalist Ira Stone (Bob Balaban), returns to Miami and he’s in trouble once again.

The last time we saw Stone, he appeared to be dying as the result of being severely wounded by Col. William Maynard (G. Gordon Liddy). I guess Stone survived because this episode opens with him and a cameraman in Nicaragua, filming anti-Communist rebels opening fire on a village. They even gun down a priest! However, it turns out that the rebels have got some help from some men who appear to be American. Stone’s cameraman is shot. Apparently leaving him to die, Stone grabs the tape of the attack and then flees to Miami.

In Miami, Stone tracks down Sonny, who is reluctant to get involved with Stone. However, when it becomes obvious that some agents of the government are not only following Stone but also trying to assassinate him, Crockett changes his mind. It turns out that the men in Nicaragua do indeed work for Col. Maynard. Maynard makes a return appearance, showing off a necklace of ears that have been chopped off of communists in an attempt to get businessmen to invest in his army. This episode drops some very obvious hints that Maynard is now working for the U.S. government.

In their efforts to help Stone get his tape to the public, Crockett and Tubbs get a few people killed. Local reporter Alica Mena (Lonette McKee) is murdered after Maynard’s men break into her office to search for the tape. In the end, Stone himself is once again wounded by Maynard’s man and this time, he actually dies on-camera. As for Maynard, he once again boards a private plane and escapes. The episode ends on a properly cynical note, with Crockett listening to reports blaming the death of the priest on the Nicaraguan government.

Actually, this whole episode feels a bit cynical. On the one hand, this episode criticizes the American government for being so anti-communist that it tries to overthrow the governments of other counties. On the other hand, a good deal of the episode’s running time is devoted to showing off Sonny’s new car, a 1986 Ferrari Testarossa. There’s even an extended chase scene that seems to exist largely so the show can work in as many close-ups of Sonny changing gears as possible. It’s a cool car but just try to get one in Nicaragua, Venezuela, or Cuba. (Or, I should say, try to get one without being related to someone who is in power.)

Ira Stone was a bit more compelling in his previous appearance on the show. In this episode, Balaban’s performance is almost too low-key. It lacks the manic instability of his first appearance, in which Stone was portrayed as being almost as mad as Maynard. This time out, he’s just another independent journalist who is convinced the government is out to get him. Fortunately, G. Gordon Liddy returns to Maynard and takes so much obvious joy in the role that he’s fun to watch. As I mentioned when Liddy last appeared on this episode, my father had a “G. Gordon Liddy for President” bumper sticker. As far as Watergate felons are concerned, Liddy was certainly less annoyingly self-righteous and more honest about his amorality than John Dean has turned out to be.

As a whole, this wasn’t a bad episode. Like last week’s episode, it was serviceable but it still seemed to be lacking the spark that distinguished the show’s first two seasons. For the second week in a row, Miami Vice puts more emphasis on its guest stars than the main cast and, perhaps as a result, the main cast seems to largely be going through the motions. (Zito and Gina don’t even appear in this episode. Castillo is barely present, which is interesting considering that the character is supposed to have connections in U.S. intelligence that would have perhaps been a bit helpful this time around.) Still, it was good to see both Stone and Maynard return to the show and remind the viewers that the vice in Miami is often the result of conflicts happening elsewhere.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 3.1 “When Irish Eyes Are Crying”

Posted on September 30, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to season 3!

Episode 3.1 “When Irish Eyes Are Crying”

(Dir by Mario DiLeo, originally aired on September 26, 1986)

The third season of Miami Vice opens with Gina saving the life of Sean Carrone (a very young Liam Neeson).

Carrone is a former commander in the IRA, a man who has lost two brothers during the Troubles and who killed his first British solider when was fourteen but who now says that he has renounced violence and is instead a believer in peace. When he gives a lecture in Miami, Gina, Zito, and Switek attend because they’ve gotten a hot tip from Izzy that an arms deal is going to occur afterwards. Instead, a teenage gunman attempts to assassinate Sean and Gina is forced to use deadly force to save Sean’s life.

Gina is put on administrative leave after the shooting, which gives her plenty of time to pursue her new romance with Sean! A jealous Crockett doesn’t trust Sean and it turns out that Crockett’s correct when it becomes apparent that Sean and his American benefactor (Paul Gleason) are looking to purchase Stinger missiles from arms dealers Max Kilzer (Walter Gotell, who played the head of the KGB in several Bond films) and Eddie Kaye (Jeff Fahey). With the dubious help of a haughty British MI6 agent (Daniel Gerroll), Crockett and Tubbs try to uncover Sean’s plans. Along the way, Tubbs gets to try out another fake accent, Crockett spends some time as Burnett without anyone noticing that Sonny Burnett looks and talks exactly like Sonny Crockett, and Eddie Kaye finds time to blow up Sonny’s beloved car.

On the plus side, this episode had a wonderful group of guest stars. When one episode finds substantial roles for Liam Neeson, Jeff Fahey, Paul Gleason, and Walter Gotell, it’s pretty good guess that the episode is going to be worth watching. All four of them give memorable performances. Liam Neeson is, of course, the star attraction here but I also enjoyed Jeff Fahey’s turn as a half-crazed bayou arms dealer who is first seen wearing a t-shirt that reads, “Kill Them All.” I also appreciated that this episode gave everyone in the cast something to do. During season 2, it was easy to forget that Gina and Trudy were even on the show.

That said, as I watched this episode, I couldn’t help but feel that it was missing the energy that made the first two seasons stand out. If the first season was tough and gritty and the second season was surreal and often shocking, the third season got off to a rather comfortable start. Don Johnson and Phillip Michael Thomas both seemed a little bit too relaxed in their roles as Crockett and Tubbs. The third season opener played out like a well-0iled machine and that was the problem. It was almost too efficient, with little of the spontaneity that ran through the previous two seasons.

It’s something that happens to every series. The first two seasons are all about experimenting and taking chances and finding the right tone. By the time the third season rolls around, the formula is in place and things can start to feel a little mechanical. That was how I felt about this episode. The supporting cast carried the drama while the main cast went through the motions. That said, the episode did what a season premiere should do. It re-introduced the viewer to the characters, it had enough violence to keep action fans happy, and it announced the show was back. We’ll see how season 3 plays out over the next few weeks.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.23 “Sons and Lovers”

Posted on September 23, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, the second season comes to a close with …. TRAGEDY!

Episode 2.23 “Sons and Lovers”

(Dir by John Nicolella, originally aired on May 9th, 1986)

The final episode of the second season Miami Vice opens with Crockett and Tubbs getting their cover blown for what seems like the 100th time. Seriously, has there every been an episode featuring these two going undercover in which their cover has not been blown? This time, they’re nearly executed by the drug dealers they were trying to arrest but, at the last minute, a sniper with a laser-guided sight shoots one of the dealers. In the confusion, Sonny and Tubbs are able to subdue most of the other dealers and disarm a booby trap that would have blown up Switek and Zito.

When Crockett mentions that they would have been dead if not for the sniper with the laser pointer, Switek says, “None of our guys have a laser.”

(Why not, Switek!? Are you guys trying to win the War on Drugs or not!?)

It turns out that the sniper worked for Angelina Medera (Phanie Napoli), the daughter of Calderone, the Colombian drug lord whose murder of Tubb’s brother led to Tubbs coming to Miami in the first place. Though she is still bitter over Crockett killing her father, Angelina has come to Miami to introduce Tubbs to his son, infant Ricardo, and to warn Tubbs that her half-brother, Orlando (John Leguizamo, in his first screen role), has put a contact out on his life.

Tubbs is a father! Tubbs is in love! Well, as Crockett could warn him, there’s nothing worse than being happy when you’re a member of the Vice Squad because it’s guaranteed that your happiness will be ripped away from you in the most violent way possible. Orlando comes to Miami and kidnaps Angelina and little Ricardo. With the help of a corrupt DEA agent named Harrison (J.C. Quinn), Orlando tries to set Tubbs up. Drawing Tubbs out to a pier where Angelina is bound in a car, Orlando plans to blow up his rival. Tubbs, being the star of the show, does manage to survive being near the car when it explodes. Angelina is not so lucky. Tragically, Tubbs believes that his son was in the car as well. (Actually, Orlando set little Ricardo back to Colombia.) At Angelina’s funeral, Tubbs receives a letter from Orlando. “I’ll be back!” it reads.

And so, season 2 ends!

The finale was a bit of a let down, largely because a good deal of the running time was devoted to flashbacks to remind us just who the Calerdones were in the first place. As well, John Leguizamo is not exactly the most intimidating of actors and his performance as Orlando was a bit stiff and awkward. (It makes sense when you consider that he was only 19 years old and making his debut on a hit television show. Anyone would be nervous.) Much like the Frank Zappa episode, it’s obvious that this episode was meant to launch a storyline that would be revisited in the future. While Leguizamo would return, it would appear that this episode is the only one to feature Tubbs’s son. So, I guess Tubbs will have to live the rest of his life thinking his childhood was blown up by a Colombian drug lord.

That’s dark!

That’s Miami Vice dark!

Despite the weak finale, I thought the second season of Miami Vice was a good one. There were a few weak episodes but, for the most part, it was a strong and stylish season and one that continued to explore just why exactly the War on Drugs proved to be unwinnable. Episodes like Out Where The Buses Don’t Run, Bushido, One Way Ticket, Little Miss Dangerous, and Trust Fund Pirates were all examples of Miami Vice at its cynical and surreal best.

Next week, we begin season 3 with a guest appearance by Liam Neeson!

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.22 “Trust Fund Pirates”

Posted on September 16, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, things get weird in Miami!

Episode 2.22 “Trust Fund Pirates”

(Dir by Jim Johnston, originally aired on May 2ns 1986)

Pirate radio DJ Captain Hook (Richard Belzer) sits on his yacht in international waters and broadcasts music to Miami while, at the same time, brokering drug deals among other yacht owners. His assistant is Noogie (Charlie Barnett), the informant who was all over the place during Miami Vice’s first season but who, up until this episode, was absent from the second season.

On another yacht, a group of Bolivians are gunned down by preppy young men who are led by Ivy League dropout Skip Mueller (Perry Lang). Skip and his buddies brag about being pirates and cheerfully make jokes while standing over the bodies of the men and the women that they killed.

A seaplane pilot named Jackson Crane (a young Gary Cole) raids the Bolivian yacht and takes some of the boat’s equipment home with him. Jackson is a longtime drug smuggler who claims that he’s on the verge of retirement. He’s dating a woman named Lani (Nicole Fosse), who happens to be Skip’s sister.

In a trailer park, Jumbo (Tommy Chong) and his wife Fluffy (Denny Dillon) keep a running tally of how many rats they’ve killed while trying to buy drugs and fence stolen goods. Jumbo calls everyone “man.” Fluffy is good with a shotgun.

And, in the middle of all this, we’ve got two aspiring drug dealers named Burnett and Cooper. Burnett and Cooper, of course, are actually Crockett and Tubbs. Just two episodes ago, one of Miami’s fiercest drug lords figured out that Burnett and Cooper are actually cops but I guess he decided not to tell anyone, despite the fact that he still thinks Crockett owes him money.

It’s a bizarre episode, full of strange characters and a plot that has so many double-crosses that it’s hard to keep track of who is betraying who. The episode was originally intended to be a sequel to Smuggler’s Blues, with Glenn Frey once again playing Jimmy the Pilot. When Frey couldn’t fit a return appearance into his schedule, the script was rewritten to feature Gary Cole as a friend of Jimmy’s. That said, it’s still obvious that the script was originally written more to highlight a popular guest star than to tell a totally coherent story.

Fortunately, Miami Vice works best when its a bit incoherent. One the major themes of the show is that no one can be trusted and that everyone is willing to betray everyone else. The world of Miami Vice is often illogical because it’s a world full of illogical people who tend to do whatever pops into their head at any given moment. Another major theme is that everyone either wants to get rich from selling drugs or they’re just adrenaline junkies who get a high from being involved in the underground. Skip and his friends are rich. They just enjoy killing people and pretending to be gangsters. This is one of the more violent and bloody episodes of Miami Vice. Skip and his friends enjoy their work a little too much.

It’s a good episode and well-acted. Gary Cole was considered for the role of Crockett before Don Johnson got the part and, in this episode, it’s easy to see why. Even as a young actor, Cole has a rugged cynicism to him that’s both dangerous and compelling. Perry Lang appeared in a lot of dumb teen comedies in the 80s, usually playing dorky nice guys. He’s absolutely chilling as the sociopathic Skip Mueller. And finally, there’s Richard Belzer, wearing an eyepatch, opening the episode by rapping with Noogie, and encouraging the criminals of Miami to enjoy some good music while breaking the law. Full of strange characters and shocking violence, this episode captures the idea of Miami being a surreal playground for the rich, ruthless, and crazy.

Next week, season 2 comes to an end!

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.21 “Free Verse”

Posted on September 9, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, the Vice Squad gets a big assignment.

Episode 2.21 “Free Verse”

(Dir by John Nicollela, originally aired on April 4th, 1986)

The wheelchair-bound poet, Hector Sandoval (played by Byrne Piven), is coming to Miami so that he can testify before a Congressional committee about the human rights abuses that are occurring in his home country, abuses that Hector claims have been partially funded by American interests. Hector is a world-famous poet but his history as an outspoken political dissident has made him politically important as well. He’s been nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize. Meanwhile, the right-wing death squads from his own country want him dead. Because Sandoval is equally critical of his country’s rebels, the left wants him dead as well. They feel he has more value as a martyr than as a living dissident.

With so many people trying to kill this important, world-famous person, his safety in America is the government’s top-most concern. So, naturally, the task of protecting Sandoval is assigned not to the FBI, the CIA, or the Secret Service. Instead, it’s given to the Miami Vice Squad. You read that correctly. A bunch of undercover cops are assigned to protect one of the most important men in the world. They meet him when he lands in the airport and their pictures are immediately taken by the horde of reporters waiting for Sandoval’s arrival. I guess everyone’s cover is blown now.

This is not a particularly interesting episode. Obviously, the show was looking to make a point about not only the political situation in Central America but also the role of the U.S. government in propping up various dictators and turning a blind eye to human rights abuses. That’s fine. Indeed, watching an episode like this today serves as a good reminder that Chavez and Maduro were hardly the first dictators to take power in South and Central America. But this episode gets so caught up in making its political points that it forgets to be interesting.

A huge part of the problem is that the members of the Vice Squad spend a lot of this episode in the background. The emphasis is on Hector Sandoval and his daughter, Bianca (Yamil Borges). Unfortunately, Byrne Piven goes so over-the-top as Sandoval that it’s impossible to take the character seriously. It’s a genuinely bad performance and it makes the episode a bit of a chore to sit through. (Admittedly, it is entertaining watching Edward James Olmos refuse to show a hint of emotion while Sandoval devours all of the scenery in their scenes together.)

For celebrity watchers, Bianca Jagger shows up as an assassin but she doesn’t really get to do much. Luis Guzman and future director Michael Bay play the imaginatively named “Goon #1” and “Goon #3.” Otherwise — and especially when compared to the episodes that came before it — this is a surprisingly forgettable episode of Miami Vice.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.20 “Payback”

Posted on September 2, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

After taking a two-month hiatus, I think it’s time to finally get back to the reviews. Thank you for your patience, everyone. Now, let’s head to down to Miami for some Vice!

Episode 2.20 “Payback”

(Dir by Aaron Lipstadt, originally aired on March 14th, 1986)

A low-level drug dealer named Jesus Moroto (Roberto Duran) wants a meeting with the detective who arrested him and sent him to jail. When Sonny Crockett arrives to see what Moroto wants, Sonny is shocked when Moroto commits suicide in the visitation room.

Sudden and violent deaths are a recurring thing in Miami but the death of Moroto haunts Sonny. As Sonny explains to Tubbs, it doesn’t make any sense for Moroto, who was only looking at a few years in jail, to have killed himself. Sonny wonders why Moroto died in front of him. Tubbs suggests that Sonny instead focus on their current assignment, trying to get close to the elusive drug lord, Mario Fuente (played by famed art rocker, Frank Zappa). As a lot of drug lords do on this show, Fuente lives on a yacht and it’s next to impossible to see him. Using their undercover identities as Burnett and Cooper, Crockett and Tubbs have so far only been able to meet with Fuente’s second-in-command, Reuben Reydolfo (Dan Hedaya).

Crockett and Tubbs find themselves assigned to work with two DEA agents, one whom — Kevin Cates (Graham Beckel) — claims that he can get Crockett and Tubbs onto Fuente’s boat. Crockett and Tubbs are reluctant to work with anyone but it soon turns out that Cates is apparently better at his job than Crockett and Tubbs gave him credit for.

Except, of course, everyone’s got a secret. Before he went to jail, Moroto stole several million dollars from Fuente. It turns out that Internal Affairs is convinced that Crockett helped Moroto steal the money and Fuente, who knows that Burnett and Cooper are actually Crockett and Tubbs, believes the same thing. The only person who can truly prove that Crockett is innocent is Kevin Cates and that’s because he’s the one who stole the money!

It doesn’t matter that the twisty plot of this particular episode is not always easy to follow. It also doesn’t matter that this episode leaves you wondering just how exactly Crockett and Tubbs have managed to maintain their Burnett/Cooper personas for so long without everyone in Miami’s underworld figuring out the truth. (Personally, I wonder that after every episode.) This episode works due to the atmospheric direction of Aaron Lipstadt and the performances of Don Johnson, Edward James Olmos, Frank Zappa, and especially Graham Beckel. Beckel gives a performance that will keep you guessing at just who exactly Kevin Cates is working for and whether or not he can be trusted. That he makes Kevin into a somewhat likable character makes it all the more disturbing when he turns out to not be quite the honest law enforcer that he made himself out to be. If the main theme of Miami Vice often seemed to be that Crockett and Tubbs were fighting a war that there was no way to win, this episode shows why their work often felt so futile. In this episode, Crockett not only has to battle a drug lord but he also has to battle Internal Affairs. No one trusts anyone.

The episode ends on an ambiguous note, with Crockett technically cleared but still unable to truly prove his innocence. (Kevin Cates, the only man who can truly prove Crockett’s innocence, is naturally gunned down during the show’s final few minutes.) Crockett is warned that Fuente is still going to be coming after him. (Unfortunately, Zappa was in poor health when he filmed this episode and Fuente would never return.) This episode is Miami Vice at its most cynical and its most effective.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.19 “The Fix”

Posted on July 8, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Crockett and Tubbs discover a judge may be taking bribes.

Episode 2.19 “The Fix”

(Dir by Dick Miller, originally aired on March 7th, 1986)

Roger Ferguson (Bill Russell) is a powerful man in Miami. A former basketball player turned lawyer, Ferguson could have been elected mayor but instead, he chose to take an appointment to the bench. In his art deco courtroom, Judge Ferguson hands down sentences and sets bail. In fact, sometimes, he sets bail at a surprisingly low amount. After a drug lord is released on a $5,000 bond and immediately catches a plane for Colombia, Crockett and Tubbs come to suspect that the Judge might be taking bribes.

And he is! Judge Ferguson has a gambling problem and a corrupt lawyer named Benedict (Harvey Fierstein, clean-shaved but recognizable from the minute he starts to speak) is taking advantage of that fact. In fact, Ferguson is so in debt that he’s had to borrow from a notorious loan shark named Pagone (Michael Richards — yes, the future Kramer from Seinfeld). Pagone is now demanding that the judge convince his son, a basketball player named Matt (Bernard King), to throw his next game.

There were some good things about this episode. It was directed by Dick Miller and yes, that is the same Dick Miller who, as a character actor, appeared in countless Roger Corman films. As a director, Miller had a good sense of style. The opening sequence, where the Vice Squad arrests a drug lord at an aviary, is genuinely exciting and well-done. There was also some moments of genuine humor, largely supplied by the contrast between Crockett’s intensity and Tubbs’s laid-back cool.

The problem is with the casting, some of which is not entirely the show’s fault. In 1986, no one knew that casting Harvey Fierstein and Michael Richards as ruthless villains would come across as being unintentionally humorous in 2024. Richards does not give a bad performance as Pagone but, whenever he threatens the judge, he sounds just like Kramer demanding the day off for Festivus. As for Bill Russell and Bernard King, I looked them up on Wikipedia after watching the show and I was not surprised to discover that they were both actual basketball players. Both of them gave earnest performances but it was easy to see that neither one of them was a natural or a trained actor. It wasn’t quite as bad as when actual basketball players used to show up on Hang Time but still, they definitely seemed to be struggling to keep up with the veteran actors in the cast.

This is yet another episode that ends with Crockett staring in horror as someone is shot on a yacht. (In this case, it’s Judge Ferguson committing suicide after killing Pagone.) Seriously, what was the yacht budget for this show?

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.16 “Little Miss Dangerous”

Posted on June 17, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

The power has returned, my mood is better, and my wrist has healed. It’s time to get back to the reviews!

Episode 2.16 “Little Miss Dangerous”

(Dir by Leon Ichaso, originally aired on January 31st, 1986)

There’s a serial killer stalking the red light district of Miami, haunting cheap motels, dark alleys, and neon-lit sex clubs. Men are turning up dead all over the place, brutally stabbed and then set on fire. Occasionally, a crude drawing is left behind. Castillo announces that every member of the Squad will be working a 12-hour shift until the killer is brought to justice. He says that they may be looking for a pimp or a prostitute who is looking for revenge.

Of course, every prostitute knows and likes Sonny Crockett. And again, this leads to the question of how exactly Sonny is able to work undercover when everyone in Miami knows who he is. For that matter, all of the prostitutes also seem to know that Gina and Trudy are working Vice as well, despite the fact that Gina and Trudy’s regular gig to go undercover as high-priced escorts. How do these people ever succeed at going undercover? Everyone knows them! I guess that’s to be expected, though, when you’ve only got 6 detectives working Vice in a city as big as Miami.

Tubbs meets a Jackie (played by singer Fiona), a young runaway who swears that she’s 18 and who says that she’s happy working as a prostitute because her body is just a commodity. Tubbs becomes obsessed with protecting the spacey but seemingly innocent Jackie, especially after he becomes convinced that Jackie’s pimp, Cat (Larry Joshua), is the murderer. Except, of course, Cat isn’t the killer. Jackie is! When Tubbs takes Jackie to a safehouse (which, of course, is also an art deco mansion), she snaps. As Crockett tries to break down the locked front door and Cat crashes into the house on his motorcycle, Jackie starts a fire and approaches Tubbs. But, instead of killing the only man who hasn’t tried to use her body, Jackie instead holds a gun to her head. This is another episode that ends with an off-screen gunshot. Interestingly, we never see Crockett actually get into the safehouse to rescue Tubbs from the fire. Instead, the ending is abrupt and the viewer, while having no doubt that Tubbs will escape the fire, knows that Tubbs will now carry Jackie’s scars as his own.

What an unsettling episode. This was Miami Vice at its most surreal and dream-like, with almost all of the action taking place at night and both Fiona and Larry Joshua giving edgy performances as two self-destructive people who live in the shadows of a wealthy American city. For once, the entire Vice Squad gets in on the action, though Tubbs is clearly the one at the center of the story. This episode reminds us that Tubbs is not quite as cynical and emotionally closed-off as Crockett but maybe, for the sake of his sanity, he should be. Little Miss Dangerous is a journey into the heart of Miami darkness.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.15 “One Way Ticket”

Posted on May 20, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, the Canadians are coming!

Episode 2.15 “One Way Ticket”

(Dir by Craig Bolotin, originally aired on January 24th, 1986)

This week’s episode of Miami Vice opens with one of the most unintentionally hilarious shots that I’ve ever seen. The action starts at a fancy wedding. The daughter of District Attorney Richard Langley (Jon DeVries) is getting married. The cream and the crop of Miami society has turned out. The camera pans over all of the formally dressed men and women until it finally comes to a stop on Sonny, wearing his white suit, a blue t-shirt, and no socks. He’s attending the wedding Tubbs, who at least bothered to put on a dress shirt.

Seriously, Sonny …. it’s wedding! Would it kill you to wear a tie or maybe put on socks to go to a wedding? And, I know I bring this up every week, but how can Sonny continually convince every bad guy in Miami that he’s a drug dealer named Sonny Burnett when he’s doing stuff like attending the wedding of the District Attorney’s daughter? Does he think that no one is going to notice that the drug dealer who always wears the same white suit looks and sounds exactly like the cop who is always wearing the same white suit?

That said, I guess it’s good that Sonny and Tubbs are the wedding because, during the reception, a coked-up assassin named Sagot (Lothaire Bluteau) pulls a gun and kills not only Langley but also two bridesmaids who happened to be standing close by. Sagot manages to escape from the reception but, that night, Zito and Switek track him down to Miami’s hottest French Canadian nightclub, Le Lieu, and arrest him on possession charges.

Sagot is working for a French Canadian drug lord named Faber (Jean-Pierre Matte) and, as with all of Faber’s men, his attorney is Laurence Thurmond (John Heard). Thurmond was a good friend of Langley’s and it’s obvious from the start that he’s not comfortable with the idea of defending the men who killed him. Thurmond and Crockett also have a long history together. Crockett blames Thurmond for getting a case dismissed against someone who shot one of Crockett’s partners, though it sounds like Thurmond was just doing his job and Crockett is actually to blame for not following proper procedure while making his arrest. (Seriously, due process may be a pain in the ass but Sonny has no excuse for not knowing what’s going to happen when he violates it.) Crockett continually demands to know how Thurmond can live with himself. Thurmond, who likes to fly a private plane in his spare time, says that it’s not easy. Then again, Thurmond can afford his own airplane and a wedding suit so, even if it is difficult to live with himself, at least he’s living well. (And again, Sonny may not like it but everyone has the right to an attorney. Again, if you’re sloppy enough to not read someone their rights or to search someone’s house without probable cause, that’s on you and not on the person who pointed it out.)

As much as Crockett would love to spend all of his time harassing Thurmond, he has a case to solve. He wants to get revenge for Langley’s death. He also wants to figure out who keeps sending him anonymous tips that are full of information that presumably only a defense attorney would know….

Lothaire Bluteau’s makes for a memorably unhinged villain and all of the evil French Canadians made for a nice change of pace from the show’s usual rogue’s gallery. That said, this episode was pretty much dominated by John Heard, playing the type of role that he played best. Heard’s morally conflicted attorney has a lot in common with the morally conflicted police detective that he later played on The Sopranos and Heard’s melancholy performance was a nice contrast to Don Johnson’s intensity. Full of twists and turns, this episode ended on a perfect note. In the end, Crockett may still not like Thurmond but he finally understands him.