Book Review: The I-5 Killer by Ann Rule

Posted on October 3, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Yesterday, I reviewed The Serial Killer Letters, a book that is largely made up of letters written by serial killers. As I mentioned in my review, I was particularly disturbed by the many letters that were written by Randall Woodfield, a former football player who is currently serving a life sentence for one murder but who has been linked to 44 others.

What was it that so disturbed me about Woodfield’s letters, beyond the fact that they were the words of a man who targeted women who physically resembled me? Some of it was the fact that Woodfield took a flirtatious tone in his letters, presenting himself as being just a charming but hapless guy who ended up suffering from a bit of bad luck. The fact that he included shirtless pictures of himself with his letters was undeniably icky. There was also the fact that, despite having been linked to several murders by DNA and a lot of other evidence, Woodfield continued to adamantly claim that he had been set up and railroaded and basically misrepresented by everyone who had ever written or spoken about his case. In fact, Woodfield was so adamant that, when first reading his words, it was tempting to question why someone who has been serving a life sentence since 1981 and who has no hope of ever getting out would not just go ahead and confess. Even the author of The Serial Killer Letters admitted to initially feeling conflicted about Woodfield and his claims of innocence. However, in order to believe Woodfield’s story, you would have to believe that cops in several different jurisdictions all decided to independently conspire against one person. Considering that his DNA has been linked to several cold cases, you’d have to accept that the DNA evidence was planted at a time when most people weren’t even sure what DNA was. You would have to ignore all of the other evidence against Woodfield. You would also have to explain away the fact that three of Woodfield’s suspect victims were acquaintances of his and that all three of them died around the same time and in similarly violent circumstances. One could accept that a gigantic conspiracy was formed to put Randy Woodfield in prison. Or one can accept that Randy Woodfield is guilty.

In Woodfield’s letters, he spent a good deal of time ranting about the true crime writer Ann Rule. In 1984, Rule wrote a book about Woodfield’s crimes, The I-5 Killer. In fact, Woodfield devoted so much space to accusing Rule of being a part of a conspiracy against him that I felt the need to read The I-5 Killer to see what Rule had to say. It’s pretty much a standard true crime book, one that gives the sordid details of Woodfield’s crimes while also detailing the investigation that led to Woodfield’s arrest. The book delves into Woodfield’s background, revealing him to have been a popular high school athlete who, even at the age of 14, had a disturbing compulsion to expose himself to complete strangers. Woodfield drifted after high school but he was a good enough football player to be drafted by the Packers. Unfortunately, even while at training camp, Woodfield couldn’t stop exposing himself to strangers. The Packers decided they didn’t need him on their team and Woodfield instead became a thief, a rapist, and a murderer. At the same time, he also worked as a bartender and always had a new girlfriend who was willing to help finance his lifestyle. The book is full of quotes about how charismatic Woodfield could be while tending bar. However, there’s also a lot of quotes concerning the fact that even Woodfield’s friends and defenders thought he was an idiot.

The book details Woodfield’s crimes and the efforts of one of the survivors of his rampage to not only recover from being shot but also to find the courage to come face-to-face with Woodfield in court. It makes for disturbing reading but the book should also be praised for revealing that Randy Woodfield was not a Hannibal Lector or a Dexter Morgan or any of the other charming, fictional murderers who tend to turn up in the movies or on television. Randy Woodfield was a loser, through and through. His motives were not complex and his methods were not clever. He was an idiot. One can understand why Woodfield hates Rule’s book but the book itself provides an invaluable service. After you read enough true crime books, you come to realize that most murderers are, for the most part, very dull people.

The edition that I read included an update on Woodfield in prison. It mentioned that Woodfield had become a prolific letter writing and that he always made sure to send everyone a shirtless picture of himself before asking them for money.

International Horror Review: Massacre in Dinosaur Valley (dir by Michele Massimo Tarantini)

Posted on October 3, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

As I watched the 1985 Italian film, Massacre in Dinosaur Valley, I found myself wondering one thing.

“Where are the dinosaurs!?”

Perhaps I’ve been spoiled by the Jurassic Park franchise but whenever I see the word “dinosaur” in a title, I expect to see dinosaurs. That’s actually probably the main reason why I, or anyone else for that matter, would watch Massacre in Dinosaur Valley. Unfortunately, there are no dinosaurs in this film. Instead, a paleontologist shows up to explain that the valley is called Dinosaur Valley because it is the home to so many fossils. This, of course, is the equivalent of telling us that, even though a city is really boring now, you should have seen it several thousand years ago. Unfortunately, we also don’t get to see any fossils in Massacre in Dinosaur Valley.

An actual screen shot from Massacre in Dinosaur Valley

There is, however, a massacre. When a plane crashes in the valley, the pilot is killed but the majority of the passengers survive. Insane Vietnam vet John Heinz (Milton Rodriguez) declares himself to be the leader of the survivors, even while his drunk wife (Marta Anderson) taunts him about everything from his lack of sexual prowess to the fact that his war record apparently isn’t as impressive as he claims. The majority of the survivors would rather be led by Kevin Hall (Michael Sopikw), a soldier of fortune who is first introduced hitching a ride on a truck and then admitting that he doesn’t even have the five dollars that he promised to pay the driver. Kevin seems like a bit of a loser but he’s better looking than Heinz and a good deal more laid back as well.

That said, it really doesn’t matter whether Kevin or John is in charge of the survivors because, what the valley lacks in dinosaurs, it makes up for in cannibals. When the cannibals attack, the survivors rather foolishly split up and quickly discover that, if the cannibals don’t get you, the quicksand will. Kevin ends up making his way through the jungle with Myara (Gloria Cristal) and Belinda (Susan Hahn).

Massacre in Dinosaur Valley was released towards the end of the infamous Italian cannibal cycle. In Italy, it was originally given the much more honest title of Nudo e selvaggio, which translates to Naked and Savage. In some parts of the world, it was released as Cannibal Ferox 2, in an effort to associate the film with Umberto Lenzi’s infamous shocker. The plot of Massacre in Dinosaur Valley obviously owes much to Cannibal Ferox. Fortunately, there’s far less animal cruelty in Massacre In Dinosaur Valley. Unfortunately, the plot moves slowly and none of the film’s violence or gore is as nightmarishly realized as in the equivalent scenes from Ferox. As well, no one in the Dinosaur Valley cast can really duplicate the charisma of Ferox‘s Giovanni Lombardo Radice, Lorraine De Selle, and Zora Kerova.

That said, even if he wasn’t a particularly dynamic actor, Michael Sopkiw was still a likable lead and he was the best thing that Massacre In Dinosaur Valley had going for it. Sopkiw is a bit of an enigmatic figure when it comes to the history of Italian exploitation films. He was an American actor and a model who, in quick succession, starred in four Italian films. He started his career with Sergio Martino’s 2019: After The Fall of New York and then went on to star in Lamberto Bava’s Blastfighter and Monster Shark before ending his acting career with Massacre In Dinosaur Valley. Sopkiw was good looking and he had a likeable screen presence. It’s easy to imagine that he could have had a career similar to Michael Dudikoff’s if he had stuck with it. But Sopkiw apparently decided that acting in B-movies wasn’t for him and he instead went into botany and started a company that makes special glass bottles that protect their contents from exposure to the sun. Good for him.

Horror Film Review: Dark Was The Night (dir by Jack Heller)

Posted on October 3, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

The 2014 horror film, Dark Was The Night, takes place in the town of Madison Woods.

Madison Woods is a small, isolated town that is located somewhere up north. It’s one of those dreary blue collar towns where everyone knows everyone else. Most of the citizens work in the logging industry, attend the same church, and drink at the same bar. It’s not a town where much happens. The police force consists of two guys, Sheriff Paul Shields (Kevin Durand) and his new deputy, Donny Saunders (Lukas Haas). Donny worked in New York City before moving to Madison Woods. Shields is currently estranged from his wife. That’s the type of thing that passes for big news in Madison Woods.

When one of the local farmers complains that one of his horses has disappeared, Shields and Saunders assume that the horse has just run off. When other animals start to disappear, Shields continues to insist that it’s all just a coincidence. When the local hunters start to talk about an ancient legend of a monster that lives in the woods, Shields replies that there are no monsters and, for good measure, there’s no God as well. (In many ways, Shields is a perfect example of the old joke about how the best way to spot an atheist is to wait a few minutes and he’ll tell you.) Even when weird cloven footsteps start to show up around town and Shields himself spots something in his backyard, the Sheriff continues to insist that there is a rational explanation for all of this. Meanwhile, Saunders hangs out at the bar and drinks and really, who can blame him? As far as I can tell, it’s not like Madison Woods has a movie theater or anything like that. It’s a really boring town. You can either develop the beginnings of a drinking problem or you can start random fights or you can get ripped apart by the thing in the woods. Make your choice.

Eventually, Shields and Saunders do discover that there is something lurking out in the woods. And, despite their attempts to come up with a rational explanation, the creature proves itself to be more than just some animal. Instead, it’s a true supernatural monster, tracking its prey through the community. As a group of loggers discover at the start of the movie, the creature is just as quick to attack humans as it is to go after deer and other wild animals. With the entire town locked away in the church basement (because, as Night of the Living Dead proved, the basement is always the safest place), Saunders and Shields try to figure out how to stop a monster that neither one of them has ever seen before.

Dark Was The Night was loosely inspired by a true story. In 1885, the citizens of Topsham in the UK were stunned to wake up one cold morning and discover a series of cloven footprints in the snow. The footprints led through the entire city and it appeared that whatever was responsible for them had stopped in front of every house and place of business. Some claimed that the footprints belonged to the devil while others said that it was just some sort of animal. The Devil’s Footprints, as the story became known, serves as a bit of Rorschach test. Those inclined to believe in the supernatural have little trouble believing that the Devil visited the town of Topsham while the more rational among us assume that the footprints were left by a wild animal and then people saw whatever they wanted. Dark Was The Night moves the story to the modern day and to America but the question remains the same. Is there really a monster in the woods or, as Shields initially believes, are people just seeing what they want to see? Unfortunately, the film reveals the monster’s existence within its opening minutes. The film would have perhaps been more effective if there had at least been some mystery about whether or not Shields’s initial instincts were correct.

Dark Was The Night is a deliberately paced film, which again would be more effective if there was any mystery at all as to whether or not the monster actually existed. On the plus side, the film is full of atmosphere and Kevin Durand and Lukas Haas are both effective as the two lawmen who find themselves in over their heads. Fans of Lost will remember Durand as the evil Martin Keamy, who was one of the most heartless characters to ever appear on that show or any other show. Durand gets to play the hero in Dark Was The Night and gives a good performance as a man who discovers that not everything has a rational explanation. That said, while the film has some interesting ideas and performances, it ultimately becomes just another monster-laying-siege film and the ending is one that most viewers will see coming from miles away. It’s not a bad film but it’s still never quite as good as one might hope.

Horror on the Lens: Robot Monster (dir by Phil Tucker)

Posted on October 3, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Today’s horror film is a true classic of its kind, the 1953 science fiction epic Robot Monster.

Now, I should admit that this is not the first time that I’ve shared Robot Monster in October. I share it every year and, every year, YouTube seems to pull the video down in November. That sucks because Robot Monster is one of those weird films that everyone should see. So, I’m going to share it again. And, hopefully, YouTube will let the video stay up for a while.

As for what Robot Monster is about…

What happens with the Earth is attacked by aliens? Well, first off, dinosaurs come back to life. All of humanity is killed, except for one annoying family. Finally, the fearsome Ro-Man is sent down to the planet to make sure that it’s ready for colonization. (Or something like that. To be honest, Ro-Man’s exact goal remains a bit vague.)

Why is Ro-Man so fearsome? Well, he lives in a cave for one thing. He also owns a bubble machine. And finally, perhaps most horrifically, he’s a gorilla wearing a diver’s helmet. However, Ro-Man is not just a one-dimensional bad guy. No, he actually gets to have a monologue about halfway through the film in which he considers the existential issues inherent in being a gorilla wearing a diver’s helmet.

Can humanity defeat Ro-Man? Will Ro-Man ever get his intergalactic supervisor to appreciate him? And finally, why are the dinosaurs there?

Despite the film’s reputation for being borderline incoherent, most of those above questions actually are answered if you pay attention to the first few scenes of Robot Monster. In fact, one could even argue that Robot Monster is maybe a little bit more clever than it’s often given credit for. Of course, it’s still a zero-budget mess of a film but it’s also undeniably fun and, in some sections, unexpectedly dark. If you’ve never seen it before, you owe it to yourself to set aside an hour and two minutes in order to watch it. You’ve never see anything like it before.

Finally, I should note that Robot Monster’s hero was played by George Nader, who actually did go on to appear in several mainstream films. Despite his good looks and talent (which may not be obvious in this film but which he did have), George Nader struggled to get starring roles in Hollywood, where he was often dismissed as just being a member of Rock Hudson’s entourage. (It’s been theorized that Nader struggled because the studios feared that giving him too big of a role would lead to the gossip magazines writing about Nader’s relationship with Hudson, though the two were just friends. Nader was in a relationship with Hudson’s private secretary, Mark Miller, from 1947 until Nader’s death in 2001.) Nader finally left Hollywood and went on to have a pretty successful career in Europe. He was perhaps best known for playing secret agent Jerry Cotton in a series of films in the 60s.

Enjoy Robot Monster!

October Positivity: End of the Harvest (dir by Rich Christiano)

Posted on October 2, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This 1995 film takes place on a college campus that is ruled over by the worst possible people …. THE PHILOSOPHY CLUB!

Okay, that might be an exaggeration. It’s a big campus and undoubtedly, most of the students are just doing their own thing and don’t particularly care about any of the clubs or any of the Greek organizations or any of that stuff. That said, it does seem like a surprisingly large amount of people are interested in the weekly Philosophy Club debates, despite the fact that the Philosophy Club itself seems to only have three members.

After seeing his religious friend get totally trampled while trying to debate the existence of God, Scott (Brad Heller) decides that it’s time to take a stand. Scott used to be a wild frat boy and he even lost his license due to a DUI. But now, he’s super Christian and he’s totally excited because he found a 50 year-old thesis about when the Bible says the world is going to end. Scott challenges the Philosophy Club to a debate and soon, flyers are being put up all over campus.

The only problem is that Scott isn’t ready for the debate. The Philosophy Club has uncovered the secrets of Scott’s dark past and, after they harass him on campus and start calling his ex-girlfriends, Scott starts to feel that he won’t be able to make his case. He begs Matt (David A.R. White) for help but Matt says that it’s pointless to try to debate anything in front of the Philosophy Club. The Philosophy Club doesn’t care about anything but Marx and Nietzsche. Matt not only thinks that the debate will be a waste of time but he also thinks that it will actually drive people away from religion.

Of course, Matt has another reasons for not wanting to talk about the end of the world. He’s been having odd dreams, in which he’s standing in a wheat field and watching an old farmer using a scythe to bring in the last harvest….

There have been several faith-base films that have been set on campus and they all have the same basic plot. A religious person goes to college and has their faith tested by people who were raised differently and who insist that science or philosophy can serve as a substitute for religion. It always seems to lead to a classroom debate and the religious student usually wins because all of the arguments have been slanted to their side. Of course, it’s not just Christian films that do this. If there’s one thing that Christians and atheists share in common, it’s an almost total ignorance about how the other side views the world and the questions of existence. Anti-Christian films always fall back on the stereotype of the fanatical parents who refuse to allow their children to leave the house. Christian films, on the other hand, always seem to feature an atheist who is angry at God. End of the Harvest doesn’t go quite as far into those stereotypes as some other Christian films do but it’s still hard not to notice that the bizarrely smug members of the Philosophy Club are left speechless by some pretty basic arguments. It’s the fantasy that both atheists and Christians tend to indulge in, the one where you come up with the pithy one-liner that no one can refute. Christians always want to know how you can be angry at a God you don’t believe in. Atheists always want to know, if God created everything, who created God. In the real world, both arguments can be easily refuted but, in the movies, they’re always game changers.

End of the Harvest is a fairly standard religion-on-campus film. It’s not going to convert anyone. That said, the scenes of Matt standing in that wheat field have a nicely surreal feel to them. In those scenes, it really does feel like the end is coming.

Horror on TV: Ghost Story 1.2 “The Concrete Captain” (dir by Richard Donner)

Posted on October 2, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

In the 2nd episode of Ghost Story, an important lesson is learned. If you’re going to bury a sea captain, do not bury him in concrete because his spirit belongs to the ocean. Upset his spirit and he’ll basically ruin whatever hopes you have of bringing tourists to the seashore!

This episode stars Gena Rowlands and Stuart Whitman and it was directed by none other than Richard Donner. Donner, of course, would go on to direct such films as The Omen, Superman, and Lethal Weapon.

Enjoy!

(Despite the weird thumbnail, this video should work if you click play.)

The TSL’s Horror Grindhouse: The Astrologer (dir by James Glickenhaus)

Posted on October 2, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Quite possibly one of the most boring film ever made, 1975’s The Astrologer tells the story of …. well, I’m not really sure what the point of it all is.

Basically, an astrologer named Alexi Abarnel (Bob Byrd) has figured how to combine the zodiac with 70s technology and, as a result, everyone’s potential for good and evil can be determined simply by typing their birthdate into a computer. The U.S. government funds his agency, which is known as Interzod. And let’s be honest, that does sound like the type of dumbass thing that the government would fund, especially when the Democrats are in power.

According to the stars, the second coming of Christ is only a few days away. Alexi is convinced that he has married the woman who is destined to give birth to the Savior. Because of this, he refuses to consummate his marriage because it’s very important that she remain a virgin. However, he hasn’t bothered to inform her of any of this so poor Kate (Monica Tidwell) spends all of her time wondering why her husband hasn’t touched her in five years of marriage and why it’s also so important to him that she never tell anyone the actual date of her birth.

Meanwhile, a group of gypsies are traveling the country and, under the leadership of Kajerste (Mark Buntzman), they are both murdering people and also compelling people to commit suicide. Interzod is concerned about Kajerste because of his “zodiacal” potential but Alexei is also concerned that he doesn’t have Kajerste’s exact birthdate. But the fact that Kajerste is commanding his followers to kill people should be enough to clue Interzod into the fact that Kajerste is bad guy, regardless of whether he’s a Capricorn or an Aquarius. Fortunately, Interzod has come up with a plan on how to kill Kajerste, one that involves implanting thoughts in his head via electrodes and tranquilizer dots. A young congressman (Al Narcisse) wants to help because he’s so interested in Interzod’s work. However, it turns out that the ludicrously complicated plan to take out Kajerste is …. well, ludicrously complicated. If my tax money is going to fund Interzod, I would hope they would make better use of it.

The film’s plot definitely has the potential to be interesting but, unfortunately, The Astrologer is a very, very talky film. It only has a 78-minute running time and the majority of the film is made up people having very long and very dry conversations about how Interzod works and why its work is important. The problem is that there’s not really any need to convince the viewers that Interzod is important or to show us how it works. No watching this film is going to be interested in an in-depth examination of a fictional government agency. Everyone knows that this isn’t 60 Minutes and it’s not like the NSA has hand-picked the correspondent who is going to be reporting on them. This is a film about spies, astrology, and a killer cult. It should be a lot of fun but instead it’s incredibly boring.

That’s not to say that it’s a total waste. This was James Glickenhaus’s first film as a director. Glickenhaus went to direct some well-regarded action films in the 80s and there are a handful of isolated moments in The Astrologer where it is obvious that the film was made by someone who had a good visual eye. A cult ceremony scene that is almost totally made up of freeze frames is nicely done. And, as always, it’s hard not to admire the ambition of someone trying to make a metaphysical thriller and tackle the big questions of existence on a budget.

In the end, though, the most interesting thing about The Astrologer is its insistence on having its characters frequently use the term “zodiacal.” Take a drink every time that you hear someone say, “zodiacal” but don’t drive afterwards.

Retro Television Review: A Little Game (dir by Paul Wendkos)

Posted on October 2, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sundays, I will be reviewing the made-for-television movies that used to be a primetime mainstay. Today’s film is 1971’s A Little Game. It can be viewed on YouTube!

Twelve year-old Robert Mueller (played by 13 year-old Mark Gruner, who would later go on to play one of Chief Brody’s kids in Jaws) just hasn’t been the same since his father died. Robert idolized his father, who was an architect who built bridges and reportedly pushed his workers to take a lot of dangerous risks to get the job done. Perhaps that explains why Robert is not getting along with his new stepfather, Paul Hamilton (Ed Nelson). Robert’s mother, Elaine (Diane Baker), is convinced that Robert will eventually come to accept Paul but Paul isn’t so sure.

Robert is a student at a private military academy. When he comes home for the holidays, he brings his “best friend” with him. Stu Parker (Christopher Shea) is friendly and polite but he’s also easily led and has a difficult time standing up for himself. Paul immediately sees that Robert is bullying Stu. Elaine, however, thinks that Paul is being too critical. That’s just the way boys are!

In his diary, Robert has written that he killed someone and that he’s sure that he got away with it. When Paul comes across the entry, he worries that Robert might be telling the truth. Paul goes as far as to hire a private detective (Howard Duff) to investigate whether there’s been any mysterious deaths at Robert’s school. Stu, meanwhile, explains that he and Robert sometimes play “a little game” where they imagine that best way to murder someone and get away with it. But Stu assures Paul that it’s just a game. They don’t actually kill anyone.

Is Stu telling the truth or is Robert just as dangerous as his deceased father, a man who Paul claims was a psychopath? Or is Paul himself the one who has become delusional with jealousy of his stepson?

The answer to those questions is pretty obvious from the minute that Robert and Stu show up at the house. In fact, it’s so obvious that it kind of leaves the viewer wondering how everyone else in the film could be so clueless. On the one hand, it’s understandable that Elaine would not want to admit that there is something seriously wrong with her son. On the other hand, how many times can anyone close their eyes to a very obvious truth? From the minute that Robert shows up, wearing his uniform and curtly ordering around the family’s maid (played by High Noon‘s Katy Jurado, who deserved a better role), he might as well have psychopath tattooed on his forehead.

That said, evil children movies are always somewhat effective, even the ones that are a bit too obvious in their approach. Psychologically, we’ve been conditioned to always associate children with innocence, optimism, and hope. Children are the future, so the saying goes. As such, it does carry some impact when they’re portrayed as being a force of danger. As I watched this film, I did find myself wondering if there was any hope for Robert. With all that he had done, could someone still reach him and turn him around? Or was he destined to go from being an evil child to an evil adult? It really does get to the question of whether evil is a real, almost supernatural force or if it’s something that’s created by a combination of environment and social taboos. Was Robert born evil or did he become evil? A Little Game doesn’t answer that question but I doubt that anyone could. Some questions are destined to be forever unanswered.

Horror Book Review: Wrong Number 2 by R.L. Stine

Posted on October 2, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

The cover of Wrong Number 2 features two teenage girls huddled around a telephone and a blurb that reads, “Call waiting …. to kill!”

What does that even mean? “Call waiting …. to kill.” That would seem to suggest that there’s a person named Call in this book who is waiting to kill someone. I’ve read the book. There’s no one named Call. Alternatively, it could mean that we’ve got a Ring situation on our hands and actually answering the phone will lead to some sort of supernatural death curse. In that case, the call itself would be waiting to kill. But again, I’ve read the book. There’s nothing supernatural about it.

“Call waiting …. to kill?” It means nothing but let’s just be honest here. It’s kind of charming in its meaninglessness. It’s an R.L. Stine book, so it seems appropriate. You can’t expect these thing to make any sort of logical sense.

Wrong Number 2 is a sequel to Stine’s The Wrong Number. One year has passed since Deena and her friend Jade were nearly killed by the chainsaw-wielding Mr. Faberson. They’ve both managed to recover nicely from almost being killed. Deena is now dating an Australian exchange student. Jade is dating the star of the school’s basketball team. Deena’s half-brother Chuck (who is also Jade’s ex-boyfriend) is off at college but, unknown to the rest of his family, he’s planning on abandoning school so that he can move to Los Angeles and become a big time movie star. Everything seems to be just fine …. until Deena and Jade start getting mysterious phone calls from a man who says that he’s going to get revenge on them.

Could it be Mr. Faberson? He’s still in prison but apparently, he’s due to soon be released. Could it be Mr. Faberson’s former mistress, a real estate agent who is trying to fiind a buyer willing to overlook the fact that a murder that occurred there and buy Mr. Faberson’s old house? Or could it even be Chuck, who shows up in town and appears to be desperate to convince Jade to dump boring old Teddy and run away to California with him?

Reading the book, it was hard to avoid the feeling that Stine himself wasn’t really sure who he wanted the villain to be. Towards the end of the book, there are three different scenes that, taken on their own, could have served as an ending for Wrong Number 2. It’s as if Stine just kept tacking on possible endings and solutions until he finally found one that he felt worked. The end result is a book that feels somewhat slapdash, even by the lenient standards of R.L. Stine. If I had survived being attacked by chainsaw-wielding maniac and was now getting calls from someone claiming they were going to do the same thing to me again, I would perhaps be a bit more upset than either Deena or Jade seems to get. At the very least, I would consider changing my number or maybe moving to a different town. Not Deena and Jade, though. And hey, good for them. If nothing else, this incredibly silly book suggests that there’s not a single trauma that can’t be conquered by dating a basketball player. The cast of Hang Time would agree, I’m sure.

Non-Fiction Review: The Serial Killer Letters by Jennifer Furio

Posted on October 2, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

One thing that I would probably never have the courage to do would be to seek correspondence with a serial killer.

That’s just me. I mean, I like horror movies. I do have a bit of a morbid streak. I devour true crime books and I do occasionally watch those trashy docudramas that show up on A&E and Netflix. But I have never personally known any serial killers and I’m totally happy to keep it that way. I don’t care if they are incarcerated and perhaps in serious mental need of pen pal to communicate with. If you’ve killed over three people, I’m not sending you anything with my return address on it.

Jennifer Furio, however, disagreed. In the 90s, she wrote to over 50 serial killers and several of them wrote back. She then published that correspondence in the 1998 book, The Serial Killer Letters. My main reaction, while reading the book, was a desire to ask, “What were you thinking!?” Furio doesn’t include any of the letters that she wrote to the killers. Instead, she only includes the letters that she got in return. Still, just from reading those letters, it’s obvious that she revealed quite a lot of details about her life to these men. Quite a few of them thank her for sending them a picture. One complains that her smile is too wide and that “whoever told women to smile all the time should be cold cocked.” Quite a few of them ask her to send them money. Another offers her what appears to be marital advice. Randall Woodfield, an ex-football player who was only convicted of one murder but who is suspected of having committed 18 others, sends several flirtatious letters and shirtless pictures of himself. Judging from Woodfield’s comments, he was, at the very least, under the impression that Furio was flirting back. There are times that the reader really does wish that Furio had included her own letters to the serial killers, if just to provide context for some of their replies. Instead, it is left as an open question as to what she said to get some of them to open up to her in the way that they did.

However, even with Furio’s contribution to the conversation missing, the letters do make for interesting and disturbing reading. Some of the killers admit their guilt. Others continue to insist that they were railroaded by the cops or the FBI. Quite a few claim that it was their partner who committed all of the murders and that they were just along for the ride. Some, like Texas’s own Henry Lee Lucas, claim to have found God. Some write about how ashamed they are of themselves while others show no shame at all. What every single one of them has in common is an intense sense of victimhood. Even the ones who admit their guilt and claim to feel shame over what they did are quick to argue that the world never gave them a chance to be anything other than a killer. A few of them, like David Gore (who was executed for his crimes in 2012) did such good job of seeming to express contrition that it wasn’t until I re-read their letters that I noticed that most of them still managed to weasel out of actually accepting responsibility for their actions. Instead, it was because they were raised by an abusive parent or because they fell in with the wrong crowd or the education system failed them or …. well, just about everyone had an excuse. Even locked away in prison and with no hope of ever gaining freedom, the majority of the book’s killers continued to manipulate and try to control others. With some, it was no doubt intentional. With others, it was probably such a natural thing that they don’t even think before doing it. It was just their nature.

It makes for disturbing reading but it also provides a valuable service. At a time when it seems as if every serial killer is destined to either have a movie or miniseries centered around themselves and their crimes, it’s good to be reminded that these people are losers. In this book, you can learn that from reading their own words and looking at the often childish handwriting that they used to scrawl out their claims of victimhood. Jennifer Furio wrote letters to over 50 serial killers and there wasn’t a Hannibal Lecter or a Dexter Morgan to be found.