Airplane II: The Sequel (1982, directed by Ken Finkleman)


It isn’t the past.  It isn’t the present.  It’s the future.

The moon has been colonized and, on Earth, the Mayflower II is preparing for its first international flight.  It will be carrying passengers from Houston to the lunar station.  Test pilot Ted Striker (Robert Hays) claims that the Mayflower II is not ready to make the trip but he’s been in the Ronald Reagan Hospital For The Mentally Ill ever since he had a nervous breakdown after losing his squadron during “the war.”

Aboard the Mayflower II is Ted’s ex-wife, Elaine (Julie Haggerty), and her new boyfriend, Simon (Chad Everett).  Simon says the Mayflower II is in perfect shape but he also turns into jelly whenever things get too rough.  Piloting the Mayflower II is Captain Clarence Oveur (Peter Graves) and waiting on the Moon is Commander Buck Murdock (William Shatner).  The crew of the Mayflower II is going to have a tough flight ahead of them.  Not only is the shipboard computer making plans of its own but one of the passengers (Sonny Bono) has a bomb in his briefcase.  Also, Ted has broken out of the hospital and is on the flight, boring people with his long stories.

Every successful film gets a sequel and when Airplane! was a surprise hit in 1980, it was inevitable that there would be an Airplane II.  Robert Hays, Julie Haggerty, Lloyd Bridges, Peter Graves, and Stephen Stucker all returned.  Unfortunately, Jim Abrahams, the Zucker brothers, Robert Stack, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, and Leslie Nielsen did not.  (The directors and Nielsen were all working on Police Squad and their absence is strong felt.)  Airplane II recreates many of the same jokes as the first Airplane! but without the first film’s good nature or genuine affection for the disaster genre.  Airplane! was made for the love of comedy.  Airplane II was made for the love of money and, while there are more than a few amusing moments, the difference is obvious and there for all to see.

Not surprisingly, Airplane II is at its funniest whenever William Shatner is on screen.  In the role of Bud Murdock, Shatner pokes fun at his own image and shows himself to be a good sport.  He’s still not as funny as Leslie Nielsen or Robert Stack in the first film but that’s because, unlike Stack and Nielsen in their pre-Airplane! days, there had always been a hint of self-parody to Shatner, even in his most dramatic roles.  If Stack and Nielsen shocked people by showing that they could do deadpan comedy, Shatner’s performance just confirmed what most suspected, that he had always been in on the joke.  Still, he’s the funniest thing in Airplane II and, whenever I rewatch this movie, I am happy he was there.

Airplane II was a box office failure, which is why the world never got an Airplane III.  Fortunately, the world did get Hot Shots and The Naked Gun.

Airplane! (1980, directed by David Zucker, Jim Abrahams, and Jerry Zucker)


Airplane!, which may be the funniest movie ever made, has made me laugh every time that I’ve watched it.  And I’ve watched it a lot!

Whenever I’m getting ready to travel for my day job, I watch Airplane!  Whenever I’m going to Baltimore or West Virginia for the holidays, I watch Airplane!  Whenever I’m in a bad mood and I need something lighten me up, I watch Airplane!  Whenever I’m in a good mood and I want to be in an even better mood, I watch Airplane!

I can’t remember how old I was when I first saw Airplane! but I know I wasn’t yet ten.  While a lot of the humor went over my head at that young age, it did not matter because I laughed at all the sight gags, like the heart hopping around on the doctor’s desk and the line of passengers waiting to “calm down” the hysterical woman.  I laughed when Ted Stryker (Robert Hays) and Elaine (Julie Haggerty) got covered in seaweed while making out on the beach.  I laughed at the people dying while listening to Ted’s story, even though I didn’t fully understand that it was because of Ted boring them to death.  I loved it when Kareem Abdul-Jabbar got annoyed with the kid in the cockpit, even though young me really didn’t know who Kareem was other than he was a basketball player.  Otto the autopilot was the coolest character around.  Stephen Stucker’s Johnny made me laugh with his nonstop energy.  “Excuse me, stewardess, I speak Jive.”  “And don’t call me Shirley.”  “It looks like I picked the wrong time to stop sniffing glue.”  Every time I heard them, I laughed at all of those lines.  I didn’t have to understand why Lloyd Bridges was suddenly upside down.  I just knew it was funny.

As I got older and rewatched the film, I started to pick up on the humor that earlier went over my head.  I traveled to Turkey when I was twelve and our tour guide spent an hour telling us that Midnight Express was not a fair representation of her country.  After that, I suddenly understood why Captain Oveur (Peter Graves) wanted to know if Joey had ever been to a Turkish prison.  I came to appreciate Julie Hagerty and Lorna Patterson as the two flight attendants.  Airplane! still made me laugh but I came to understand that it was also a love story.  What adolescent boy watching Airplane! didn’t want to be Robert Hays, not only landing the plane but also getting kiss Julie Hagerty at the end of the movie?

And then, as I learned more about the movies, I realized that Airplane! was a pitch perfect parody of the disaster genre and I came to understand the brilliance of casting actors like Lloyd Bridges, Robert Stack, Peter Graves, and especially Leslie Nielsen in this film.  From the first time I saw the movie, Nielsen always made me laugh because he had the best lines and he delivered them with deadpan perfection.  But, as I got older, I came to understand that Nielsen was doing more than just saying funny things.  He was sending up his entire career.  I’m a part of the generation who grew up laughing at Leslie Nielsen the comedy superstar and it’s always strange for me to see him in one of his older, serious roles.  I have Airplane! to thank for that.

There’s so much to say about Airplane!  I could write a thousand words just talking about my favorite jokes and one-liners or how much I enjoyed Stryker’s flashbacks.  It’s my favorite movie and one that still makes me laugh even though I know all of the jokes by heart.  (I’ve always thought Howard Jarvis waiting for Stryker to return to the taxi was one of the best, though underrated, jokes in the movie.)  Airplane! is close to 50 years old and it’s still just as funny today as when I first saw it.

In fact, I think I’ll go watch it right now!

Late Night Retro Television Reviews: Highway to Heaven 1.14 “Plane Death”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Highway to Heaven, which aired on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi and several other services!

This week, Jonathan and Mark enlist in the War on Drugs.

Episode 1.14 “Plane Death”

(Dir by Victor French, originally aired on January 9th, 1985)

In a small town in California, a man named Charlie Down (Robert Ford) drives his big family car down an isolated car.  One thing that that is immediately noticeable is that Charlie has a gigantic pair of fuzzy dice hanging from his rearview mirror.  That’s rarely a good sign.  The other thing that is immediately noticeable is that a remote control airplane is flying over the landscape.  As the audience will soon learn, the people in this town are obsessed with remote control airplanes.  That’s because drug dealer Jack Harm (Michael Bowen), the son of the local sheriff, is using the airplanes to smuggle cocaine.  When one of the planes crashes, Charlie rushes out to it and grabs the cocaine for himself.  He is pursued by Jack and his gang.  Charlie runs away from them.  An off-screen gunshot is heard.

What Jack doesn’t know is that the man that he murdered is an old friend of Mark Gordon’s (Victor French).  For the past few months, Mark has been on the road with angel Jonathan Smith (Michael Landon).  They’ve been taking care of people all over America.  But right now, they are between assignments.  They show up in town so that Mark can see his friend but, shortly after arriving, Mark is informed that Charlie has gone missing.  It doesn’t take Mark long to figure out what happened.  He announces that he’s going to get revenge, “just like in the Bible, eye for an eye.”

Fortunately, Jonathan is there to keep Mark from doing something that he might regret.  Before Mark can drive down to the local bar, Jonathan arranges for the police and the FBI to show up and take Jack and his gang into custody.  Jack’s father can only watch in disappointment as his son is taken off to prison.  When Mark thanks Jonathan for keeping him from making a mistake, Jonathan replies that he’s sure Mark would have stopped himself from killing anyone.  Mark says that he wouldn’t have been able to stop himself and Victor French’s delivery of the line is so somber and serious that there’s little doubt he was prepared to kill everyone in town.

At Charlie’s funeral, his young son (played by David Faustino) announces that he’s going to become a cop so that no other kids have to feel as bad as he feel right now.  Jonathan says that Charlie would be proud to hear that.  Mark asks Jonathan if the country is ever going to be able to win the war on drugs.

“If they don’t,” Jonathan replies, “they’re may not be a country to worry about.”

Yikes!  Setting aside the ultimate futility of the War on Drugs (which far too often became a war on addicts as opposed to war on the people making money off of them), this episode was actually pretty well-done.  Mark’s intense anger was perfectly portrayed, making him a bit frightening even if you understood his desire for revenge.  Michael Bowen’s superficially friendly psychopath was easy to dislike.  This was one of those episodes where the viewer appreciates the sincerity of the show’s emotions even if the legacy of the War on Drugs has ultimately been one of failure.