I Watched The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes (1969, Dir. by Robert Butler)


Medfield College has a problem.  No one takes the college seriously.  Maybe if the college could win the big college quiz show, people would finally stop laughing at Medfield but the students are not academically talented.  Professor Quigley (William Schallert) thinks that the college needs to finally buy a new-fangled device called a computer.  The Dean (Joe Flynn) says that there’s no way any college can afford something as expensive as that!  Luckily, businessman and gangster A.J. Arno (Cesar Romero) is willing to donate one of his computers.  It takes several students to move the computer into the lab because the computer is huge.

Medfield finally has a computer but are the students smart enough to win that quiz show?  Popular jock Dexter Riley (Kurt Russell) happens to be in the lab during a freak thunderstorm.  When both he and the computer get struck by lightning at the same time, it leads to Dexter becoming a human computer.  He suddenly knows everything.  He can speak any language and solve any equation.  He can answer any question/  Whenever anyone shines a light into Dexter’s ear, they see circuit boards.  No one really cares that none of this makes sense.  Medfield is going to win that quiz show for sure!  But first, Dexter is going to have to escape from Arno, who fears Dexter now knows all the details about his gambling ring.

Watching this Disney film was a real eye-opener for me.  Computers are such a part of my everyday life that it was strange seeing a college making such a big deal about getting one.  The computer that Medfield got looked more like the type of computer that NASA used to go to the moon than the ones that were in my high school computer lab.  I was worried that no one seemed to care that Dexter had a circuit board in his head.  Not even Dexter seemed to care.  It was also funny to me that all he had to do was get struck by lightning while standing near a computer and suddenly, he knew how to speak every language and solve every problem.  I use a computer everyday and I can still only speak English and Spanish.  I feel like I’m getting cheated.

The whole movie was absolutely ludicrous but I did enjoy watching this movie.  It was too sweet, innocent, and good-natured not to enjoy.  There was nothing realistic about the movie but it was nice to imagine a world where everyone gets along, the bad guys are all too buffoonish to really be dangerous, and a serious knock on the head leads to thing returning to normal instead of permanent brain damage.  Kurt Russell was only 18 when he made The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes but he could already carry a movie.

Shattered Politics: The One and Only, Genuine, Original Family Band (dir by Michael O’Herlihy)


First released in 1968, The One and Only, Genuine, Original Family Band is an old school Disney family film that almost feels like a rather mean-spirited parody of an old school Disney family film.  The songs are forgettable, the film has a cheap made-for-TV look to it, and the whole thing feels a bit too manufactured to  produce any sort of genuine emotion.

That said, it’s memorable for two reasons.  First off, it may be the only film ever made that centers on the presidential election of 1888.  In the Dakota territories, the citizens wait to see whether or not Democrat Grover Cleveland will be reelected or whether he’ll be defeated by Republican Benjamin Harrison.  Those who support the Dakotas joining the Union as one state hope to see Cleveland returned to the White House.  Those who favor the creation of a North and South Dakota hope that Benjamin Harrison will win the election, allowing for four new Republican senators to be sent to Washington.

Confederate veteran Renssaeler “Grandpa” Brown (Walter Brennan) supports the Democrats and he’s got his family singing songs to promote the cause of Grover Cleveland.  Grandpa’s son, Calvin (Buddy Ebsen), is a Republican who still has no problem performing at the Democratic Convention because he, much like his children, is a born performer.  His oldest son, Sidney (Kurt Russell, who was 16 at the time of filming), is not old enough to vote but I imagine he’d probably vote for the Republican ticket because he’s Kurt Russell and it’s hard to imagine Kurt voting for a Democrat.  The other children want to keep both Grandpa and their father happy.  Meanwhile, daughter Alice (Lesley Ann Warren) has fallen in love with newspaper editor, Joe Carder (a very bland John Davidson).  Joe’s a Republican and supports Benjamin Harrison.  Grandpa’s not happy but really Grandpa should just mind his own darn business.  At least, that’s my take on it.  (Also, I gave up cursing for Lent.)

On the one hand, the Bowman sisters are pretty evenly split politically, with two voting for the Democrats and the other two tending to vote Republican so I could definitely relate to the idea of a family that didn’t always agree on politics  At the same time, this film’s premise means that there are a lot of songs about Benjamin and Grover Cleveland in this film and they’re about as memorable and exciting as you would expect a bunch of songs about two of America’s forgotten presidents to be.  If you learn anything about the election of 1888 from this film, you’ll learn that Cleveland’s full name was Stephen Grover Cleveland.  You might also note that, for all the talk about how the country have never been as divided as it is today, people were saying the exact same thing in 1888.

The other thing that makes this otherwise forgettable film stand-out is that it features the film debut of Goldie Hawn, who appears as a Republican dancer in the film’s climax.  This was not only Hawn’s debut but it was also the first film that she made with Kurt Russell.  That said, don’t panic.  Hawn was 22 to Kurt’s 16 when she made this film but the two of them didn’t become a couple until they met again in 1983, while filming Swing Shift.  I read an interview with Kurt where, when asked whether he noticed Goldie Hawn in her film debut, he said that he did but he didn’t even think of talking to her because, “I didn’t even have a car.”

Fortunately, everything worked out in the end.  Benjamin Harrison vanquished Grover Cleveland (though Grover returned in 1892, becoming the first of two president to serve non-consecutive terms) and, after their second film together, Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn are together to this day.

 

 

Scenes That I Love: Kurt Russell In Used Cars


Used Cars (1980, directed by Robert Zemeckis)

Today is not only St. Patrick’s Day!  It’s also Kurt Russell’s birthday!

Today’s scene that I love comes from one of my favorite Kurt Russell movies, the wonderful 1980 comedy, Used Cars!  In this scene, Kurt’s ambitious used car salesman promotes his senate candidacy and gets some important advice from his mentor (Jack Warden).  This scene features both Russell and Warden at their considerable best.  Needless to say, if you haven’t watched this film, you need to!

(Watch it with Fargo and have yourself a car salesman double feature!)

 

#MondayMuggers present THE MEAN SEASON (1985) starring birthday boy, Kurt Russell!


Every Monday night at 9:00 Central Time, my wife Sierra and I host a “Live Movie Tweet” event on X using the hashtag #MondayMuggers. We rotate movie picks each week, and our tastes are quite different. Tonight, Monday March 17th, we celebrate Kurt Russell’s 74th birthday by watching THE MEAN SEASON (1985) co-starring Mariel Hemingway, Richard Jordan, Richard Masur, Richard Bradford, Joe Pantoliano, and Andy Garcia. 

Kurt Russell plays Malcolm Anderson, a reporter for a Miami newspaper. He’s had enough of reporting the local murders, so he promises his school teacher girlfriend (Mariel Hemingway) that they’ll move away soon. Before Malcolm can hand in his notice, the murderer (Richard Jordan) from his latest article phones him. The murderer tells Malcolm that he’s going to kill again. The phone calls and murders continue, and soon Malcolm finds that he’s not just reporting the story, he is the story.

We thought it would be fun to join The Shattered Lens and make Kurt Russell our centerpiece for the day. There’s absolutely nothing more enjoyable to me than watching movies with friends. And If you enjoy Russell, Miami, and serial killer thrillers, you should like this one. So, join us tonight for #MondayMuggers and watch THE MEAN SEASON! It’s on Amazon Prime.

The trailer for the THE MEAN SEASON is included below:

I Watched Touchback (2012, Dir. by Don Handfield)


When he was in high school, Scott Murphy (Brian Presley) was nicknamed “Mr. Football.”  He was the best high school player in Ohio and everyone knew he was going to make it far in the NFL.  His dreams of football stardom ended on the night of the big game when his leg was shattered during a running play.  Twenty years later, Scott is still living in his small town.  He owns a farm that he can’t make the payments on and crops that he can’t bring in.  When Scott learns that he is to he honored at the next high school football team for taking the team to the state championship years ago, it causes him to break down.  He attempts to commit suicide but, when he passes out from inhaling carbon monoxide, he doesn’t die.  Instead, he wakes up as a high school student in 1991.

Scott has his second chance.  The championship game is coming up and, if Scott can keep from getting injured, he’ll be able to accept his scholarship to Ohio State and go on to the NFL.  He makes sure to introduce himself to his future wife Macy (Melanie Lynesky) so he won’t lose her.  He befriends the kids that he picked on the first time he was in high school.  When a college scout tells him that his scholarship will not be rescinded if he chooses to sit out the big game, Scott decides to stay on the bench but then his coach (Kurt Russell) explains how much the game means to the people in the town.  Scott realizes he has to play for them but can he get through the game without getting injured a second time?

What would you do if you had a second chance?  That’s something that everyone wonders.  If I had a second chance to relive my senior year of high school, I would take more risks, worry less about the unimportant stuff, and try to be nicer to everyone and not just the members of my social circle.  If I knew I was going to suffer a life-changing injury, I would probably go out of my way to make sure it didn’t happen.  That’s where Touchback loses me because I just don’t think Scott would have played in that game, no matter how eloquent the coach was.  If Scott had sat out the game, the town might have lost the championship but Scott could have gone on to the NFL, still married Macy, and his family wouldn’t be struggling to make ends meet on the family farm.

If I didn’t really believe Scott would have made the decision that he made, there were still parts of Touchback that I liked.  Kurt Russell was a great coach.  I liked the way the town rallied to Scott, even when he was at his lowest and about ready to give up.  That’s one thing I love about close-knit communities.  They take care of each other.

I Watched Dreamer (2005, Dir. by John Gatins)


Dreamer is based on the true story of a horse that did something that few horses have managed to do.  It broke a bone but it still managed to make a comeback as a racehorse.

I love horses, which is why I’m not a fan of horseracing.  I find horseracing to be cruel.  The horses, which have an innate need to follow the orders of whoever is riding it, will literally run themselves to death to try to keep their jockeys happy.  When you add that many racehorses are kept in deplorable conditions and that, with insurance, they are often worth more dead than alive, you have a sport that brings out the worst in a lot of people.  Horses are wonderful animals because they are so loyal.  That loyalty deserves better than being shot because they broke a leg due to their trainer’s negligence.

Given how I feel about horseracing, I’m amazed that I liked Dreamer when I saw it in the theaters and I was surprised that I still liked it when I watched it this weekend.  I guess it’s because the horse in Dreamer is not euthanized.  She would have been euthanized if not for the fact that her trainer (Kurt Russell) brought his daughter (Dakota Fanning) to work with him that day.  Russell loses his job but he does gain a horse.  After the horse recovers from its injury, Russell hopes to breed the horse.  It turn out that the horse cannot have a foal but it can still race.  With Russell and Fanning’s help, the horse returns to competition and shows up everyone who gave up on her.  Russell and Fanning refuse to give up on the horse and the horse doesn’t give up on herself.  Along the way, Russell and Fanning finally spend time together as father and daughter and Russell reconnects with his wife, Elisabeth Shue, and his father, Kris Kristofferson.  Everyone involved gives a good job.  The movie may be predictable but there aren’t any false notes in any of the performances.  I not only wanted the horse to get better but I wanted the family to grow closer and I was happy when both those things happened.

Dreamer is a good family movie.  If only every trainer was as kind and willing to admit his mistakes as Kurt Russell is in this film.  There’s nothing surprising about Dreamer but it’s still a movie that makes me cheer.  It makes me cheer in a way that a real horse race never would.

 

Scenes that Bradley loves – triggering human time bombs in TELEFON!


Well before THE NAKED GUN was triggering Reggie Jackson, director Don Siegel and Charles Bronson were triggering human time bombs in TELEFON (1977). Quentin Tarantino even borrowed from this film when he chose the Robert Frost poem for Stuntman Mike’s (Kurt Russell) lap dance from Arlene (Vanessa Furlito). It’s not as sexy, but it’s still a good time as Bronson tries to prevent World War III. Enjoy!

Taking my love of movies on down the road (Part 1) – THE HATEFUL EIGHT 2015 Roadshow


I love movies. And when I say that I love movies, I don’t mean that I just enjoy watching them. When I say I love movies, what I’m really saying is that my love of cinema is part and parcel of who I am. And I truly enjoy sharing that love with any person who will listen to me, or in this case, read what I have to say. For most of my life, I experienced the wonder of movies either at my local cinema or on VHS, DVD or Blu-ray at my house. It was a really big deal for me to travel about 45 miles to the big city of Little Rock and watch a movie at the Cinema 150, which was the coolest theater in Arkansas prior to the stadium seating multiplexes that we have now. Unfortunately, it had to close its doors way back in 2003, but I still have fond memories of the place. Watching movies at the Cinema 150 was reserved for the big, special effects movies like TRUE LIES and TWISTER where the Cinema 150 could give you that added value! Those days that included dinner at Casa Bonita and a movie at the Cinema 150 were great days. In 2015, I started taking my love of movies on the road, and these have been some wonderful experiences for a movie lover like me. Over the next week, I’m going to share a few of those experiences here. I hope you enjoy them!

The first time I ever left the state of Arkansas specifically to watch a movie was the week after Christmas in 2015. My son Hank and I made the trip to Dallas, TX, actually Arlington, which was about a 4-hour drive, to attend the unique “Roadshow” presentation of THE HATEFUL EIGHT. Hank was 15 and I had introduced him to Tarantino’s films by this point. As an avid gamer, with a specific interest in first person shooter “War” games, he really liked INGLORIUS BASTERDS. He was a fun partner to have on this trip! I was excited to see Tarantino take on the western genre, one of my favorites. I thought Kurt Russell was perfect for the part of “the hangman” John Ruth, and we all know what Samuel L. Jackson is capable of when acting out Tarantino’s words. It was also a terrific showcase role for Jennifer Jason Leigh. But I have to admit the performance I enjoy the most of all is that of Walton Goggins as Sheriff Chris Mannix. As a big fan of the JUSTIFIED TV series, I couldn’t wait to see how he would perform in the company of those amazing film actors, and I was so glad to see him knock it out of the ballpark! The roadshow version of The Hateful Eight included a 70 MM projector, a 4-minute overture, 12-minute intermission, Cinerama logos, and a cool booklet. I still have the booklet from the show we attended. We both loved the movie. Hank and I were recently talking about Tarantino, and I asked him what his favorite Tarantino film was. Without hesitating, he said THE HATEFUL EIGHT. I love it as well. This “roadshow” movie experience is a very special memory that I have with my son. I’ve shared a few of the pictures from the booklet below. Enjoy!

Scenes That I Love: Gerrit Graham Battles Inflation in Robert Zemeckis’s Used Cars


Today, the Shattered Lens wishes a happy birthday to director Robert Zemeckis!

Today’s scene that I love comes from Zemeckis’s 1980 comedy, Used Cars!  In this scene, used car salesman Gerrit Graham interrupts a televised presidential address so that he can demonstrate the best way to deal with inflation.

(Of course, he does the demonstration at a rival used car lot.)

Jack Warden watches as his cars blow up while Graham’s boss (Kurt Russell) tries to keep his business partner (Deborah Harmon) from noticing what is happening on the television.

“That price is too high!”

Robert Englund as Han Solo? A Little May 4th Trivia


Can you imagine how things might have played out if Robert Englund had played Han Solo?

It’s not as far-fetched as it might sound.  In his autobiography, Hollywood Monster: A Walk Down Elm Street with the Man of Your Dreams, Englund mentions that he was one of the many actor who, in 1975, auditioned for a role in the first Star Wars film.  It’s often forgotten that, before he became famous as Freddy Krueger in A Nightmare In Elm Street, Englund was a busy character actor who had roles in several big studio productions in the 70s.  He was definitely a part of the “new Hollywood” that included people like George Lucas, Steven Spielberg, and Jon Milius.

Though Englund doesn’t go into much detail, he does say that he read for the roles of both Han Solo and Luke Skywalker.  At the time, Englund didn’t feel that he was right for either role and he went back to his apartment under the correct impression that he would not be cast.  However, he did feel that his friend and then-roommate Mark Hamill would be a good pick for Luke Skywalker and Englund writes that he encouraged Hamill to try out for the role.

Would Mark Hamill have been cast if Robert Englund hadn’t told him about the audition?  Probably.  Given that Star Wars was Lucas’s follow-up to the very popular American Graffiti, it’s probable that every struggling young actor in Hollywood was hoping to audition.  As well, Hamill was not totally unknown to George Lucas, having early read for a role in American Graffiti.  Still, it’s nice to think that, long before he was cast as Freddy Krueger, Robert Englund may have played a role in casting one of the most successful films of all time.

What would Robert Englund have been like as Han Solo?  He definitely would not have been as grouchy as Harrison Ford’s Han.  Indeed, one of the striking things out about Englund’s pre-Nightmare career was how he was usually cast as friendly characters who were almost shy.  Englund would have been friendlier and rather eccentric Han Solo but I think he would have been entertaining in his way.

Because of the film’s success, it can be a bit difficult to know who was actually considered for a role in Star Wars.  Lucas has said that he originally wanted to cast Black actor Glynn Turman as Han Solo but he feared audiences would not accept the possibility of an interracial romance between him and Leia, even in a galaxy far away.  (Lucas’s regret over that decision is one of the things that led to the casting of Billy Dee Williams as Lando Calrissian.)  The film’s IMDb trivia page insists that everyone from Al Pacino to Bill Murray to Marlon Brando to Chevy Chase was considered for the role of Han Solo and I have to say that this is a case where I doubt the accuracy of the IMDb.  Harrison Ford, who had originally been hired only to read with people at the auditions, eventually got the role despite telling Lucas, about the script, “You can type this shit but you can’t say it.”

In several interviews, Christopher Lee expressed regret at having turned down the role of Grand Moff Tarkin, which was instead played by Lee’s best friend Peter Cushing.  Interestingly enough, Cushing was also one of Lucas’s choices for Obi-Wan Kenobi so it’s easy to imagine a universe in which Star Wars reunited two Hammer films legends, along with setting box office records.

Famously, Lucas held joint-auditions with his friend Brian De Palma.  De Palma was casting Carrie and just about everyone who read for one of the films also read for the other.  Reportedly, William Katt came close to getting the role of Luke before instead being cast as Carrie’s doomed prom date.  Amy Irving was also a strong contender for Leia, before instead ending up as Sue Snell in De Palma’s film.  Some source that that Sissy Spacek also read for Leia, though I’ve also read that Spacek was not a part of the joint-auditions.  That’s one thing about collecting trivia about classic films.  It’s often hard to know what’s true and what’s just wishful thinking.

I should mention that another strong contender for Han Solo (and reportedly Luke as well) was Kurt Russell.  It’s actually easy to imagine Kurt Russell as Han and, just as with Englund, it leads to an intriguing game of what if.  Would Kurt Russell have gone on to have Harrison Ford’s career if he had been cast in Star Wars?  Would Russell have gone to play Indiana Jones and Jack Ryan if he had been cast as Han Solo and would Harrison Ford have ended up helping the President to Escape from New York?  Or is it just as possible that Star Wars have not worked without the chemistry of Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, and Mark Hamill?  Would a Kurt Russell, Amy Irving, and William Katt version of Star Wars captured the imagination of audiences?

It’s a question to which there is no real answer, a bit like wondering if The Godfather would have been as big a hit if it had starred George C. Scott, Martin Sheen, and Burt Reynolds.  Still, it’s interesting to consider.