Late Night Retro Television Review: 1st & Ten 2.5 “California Freeze Out”

Posted on November 19, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing 1st and Ten, which aired in syndication from 1984 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on Tubi.

Victory’s yours …. for that taking….

Ugh, let’s do this.

Episode 2.5 “California Freeze Out”

(Dir by Bruce Seth Green, originally aired on September 22nd, 1986)

Training camp continues!

Oh, Good Lord, does it continue.

And look, I get it. This was a low-budget show that relied on stock footage for the majority of its game footage. There was probably only so much footage available. Not every episode could feature a game. And training camp is an important part of football and I’m sure that, back in 1986, HBO was proud of that set they built for the ugly bar where all the players hang out. It’s not a bad set. You look at it and you can literally smell the rancid combination of sweat and urine that seems to follow most male athletes.

But seriously …. I’M TIRED OF TRAINING CAMP! Its time to move on!

As for this episode …. hey, Waldren is already back from rehab and he’s clean! That was quick. However, shady quarterback Johnny Valentine continues to hang out with drug dealers and Waldren gives into temptation. He ends up at a raucous drug party that’s busted by the cops. Waldren jumps out of a window. His date is accidentally shot. You might think that Johnny Valentine would be in trouble considering how anti-drug the league has become but it turns out that Johnny is a star and busting him would effect ad revenue. So, Johnny gets off scot-free.

Meanwhile, O.J. Simpson — whoops, sorry, I meant to say T.D. Parker, don’t hurt me, Vengeful Spirit of O.J. — recruits a young player named Rick Lambert (Marcus Allen) to be the team’s new running back. Marcus Allen gave such a stiff performance that I immediately realized that he had to have been an actual player and it turns out that I was right. You can always tell the actual players because they’re the ones who can never summon up any emotion when they stumble through their lines. O.J. was the epitome of a player who became a bad actor but he came across as being …. well, not quite Olivier but maybe David Niven, while acting opposite Marcus Allen. Maybe that’s why Allen was added to the cast, to make O.J. look good.

Anyway, here’s hoping that O.J. and the rest of the Bulls slash their way out of training camp soon!

Late Night Retro Television Review: 1st & Ten 2.4 “Quarterbacks Tell No Tales”

Posted on November 5, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, a player’s reputation is on the line. Can he clear his name, even though all the evidence is stacked up against him?

Episode 2.4 “Quarterbacks Tell No Tales”

(Dir by Bruce Seth Green, originally aired on September 15th, 1986)

T.D. Parker (played by O.J. Simpson) is pissed off! The normally affable former player is angry that someone is dealing cocaine to the Bulls. The press and the commissioner both assume that the dealer is rookie quartebrack Tim Yinessa. (That guy that Yinessa caught searching his room last week? He was a reporter.) T.D. isn’t so sure. He thinks that start quarterback Johnny Valentine (Sam Jones) is responsible for the team’s cocaine problem. T.D. eventually confronts Johnny and tells him to stop with the drugs.

“25% of this league retires injured,” Johnny says, “You’re proof of that.”

T.D. gets so angry that he proceeds to ~~stab Johnny to death~~ punch Johnny in the chest. “Welcome to the 25%,” he says.

No, T.D. Johnny said “retired” players. Johnny’s not retiring yet. Anyway, Johnny was so coked up that he probably didn’t even feel the punch.

As for Yinessa, he nearly gets kicked off the team when the real dealer plants some cocaine in his locker. Luckily, his roommate — Jamie Waldren (Jeff Kaake) — steps forward and confesses that he was the owner of the cocaine that the reporter found in the room. Diana orders Jamie to go to rehab. “Sure, I guess,” Jamie replies.

While that’s going on, Dr. Death and Mad Dog Smears continued to harass the rookies by ordering one of them to fake a suicide attempt as a part of a practical joke. At the bar where they hang out, they also sang a song against urine testing. I’m not really sure why anyone would want to hang out at the bar, as it seems like the whole place only exists so that Dr. Death and Mad Dog can put on painfully unfunny stage shows. Dr. Death and Mad Dog also told Yinessa that they would kill him if he agreed to random urine testing in order to prove his innocence. Personally, I think Dr. Death and Mad Dog should focus on their jobs. Maybe if they did a better job protecting the other players, T.D. wouldn’t have had to retire. I mean, you can tell it’s really cutting T.D. apart that he can’t play anymore.

So, Jamie is off to rehap, Yinessa is still on the team, and T.D. didn’t have to kill anyone. All in all, it was a productive week. To be honest, it’s difficult to judge this show based on traditional standards of good and bad. Technically, every episode is bad. This week, however, was slightly less bad than usual.

Late Night Retro Television Review: 1st & Ten 2.3 “A Second Chance”

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Things are getting crazy at training camp!

Episode 2.3 “A Second Chance”

(Dir by Bruce Seth Green, originally aired on September 8th, 1986)

This week’s episode featured the unforgettable sight of O.J. Simpson tackling a knife-wielding Don Swayze and saving the life of Delta Burke.

Swayze was playing Clay Daniels, a tight end who was drafted by Coach Denardo, even though he apparently pulled a knife on a professor in college. After Clay threatened Johnny Valentine after he felt Valentine wasn’t throwing him the ball enough, Denardo explained that he drafted Clay because Clay can play football. Okay, Ernie, I guess that justifies having a knife-wielding maniac in the locker room….

After Denardo finally cut Clay from the team, Clay showed up at Diana’s house with a knife. Fortunately, Diana was able to call Denardo and T.D. Parker for help. Denardo showed up and promised he would give Clay a second chance. And then T.D. tackled Clay and grabbed that knife like a pro!

Meanwhile, Yinessa returned to training camp but he was not happy that his friend and roommate, wide receiver Jamie Waldren (Jeff Kaake), had a drug problem. This episode ended with Yinessa getting into a fight with someone who broke into their room in search of Waldren’s cocaine. An angry Yinessa flushed all of Waldren’s cocaine. Considering that this episode also featured Diana being named Chairperson of the League’s Anti-Drug Committee, I’m sure this won’t lead to any sort of awkwardness with the team.

Much like last week’s episode, this episode was so melodramatic and over-the-top that I couldn’t help but enjoy it. Drugs, training camp, and knives! Will the Bulls make it to the Championship Game a second year in a row? It’s not looking good but, considering that they have O.J. Simpson’s razor-sharp instincts at their disposal, I wouldn’t count them out yet!

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 1.17 “Brothers”

Posted on April 4, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988. The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

Another day, another death in Boston.

Episode 1.17 “Brothers”

(Dir by Mark Tinker, originally aired on March 15th, 1983)

I swear, St. Eligius must have the worst security guards in Boston.

In this episode, Walter Schaefer (Pat Hingle), a blue collar fisherman, manages to smuggle a freaking hunting rifle into the hospital so that he can use it to kill his brother, Arthur (Richard Hamilton). Arthur was dying of cancer and didn’t have much time left. Walter had previously begged Dr. Westphall to cease giving Arthur chemotherapy and to just let his misery come to an end. Westphall declined to do so so Walter killed his brother. The episode was designed to make the viewer feel that Walter had no choice but …. eh, I don’t know. I’m not a fan of euthanasia and I find the enthusiasm for it in television and film to be a bit icky. This episode’s treatment of the issue was about as heavy-handed as they come. And seriously, couldn’t Walter have just smothered Arthur with a pillow or something? Shooting a man is dramatic but now I’m wondering about who had to clean up the room afterwards. Plus. Arthur was hooked up to a bunch of medical equipment that was probably ruined as well.

(I don’t know, it’s hard for me to judge this storyline. My Dad died in hospice care and I had to sign a DNR order before he could start it. The aggressiveness that those people showed in demanding that I sign the order still haunts me.)

On a lighter note, Ehrlich managed to get another date with Shirley, despite the fact that their previous date ended with Ehrlich drunk and making a fool of himself. Fiscus recommended a nice romantic restaurant. Of course, when Ehrlich couldn’t make the date due to his work as a doctor, Fiscus took Shirley to the restaurant. The end result is that Shirley has a crush on Fiscus and Fiscus needs to find a new place to stay because Ehrlich responded by kicking him out of the apartment.

Speaking of relationships, Dr. White is such a sleaze! He’s separated from his wife so he’s now involved with a nurse. While talking to that nurse on the phone, White was flirting with another nurse. But then, Dr. White happened to see his wife out with another man and decided he had the right to get all jealous. Ugh! What a jerk!

Finally, the episode ended with Nurse Rosenthal on the operating table, about to undergo a mastectomy. This was the subplot that actually got to me, not all of the stuff about Walter murdering his brother. Christina Pickles, who has been such a steady presence during the first season, gave a wonderful performance as Rosenthal tried to keep it together as the day of her surgery approached. This storyline brought tears to my eyes and that’s really all I have to say about it.

This was an uneven episode. The stuff with the brothers didn’t do much for me but, when the episode just focused on the doctors and the nurses, it shined.