Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 3/17/24 — 3/23/24

Posted on March 23, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Abbott Elementary (Wednesday Night, ABC)

I’m now caught up with Abbott Elementary. Season 3 has been a bit rocky for me and, as I watched the latest episode on Thursday morning, I realized that it really did come down to the fact that it seems as if Abbott is running the risk of losing its edge. The celebrity cameos are nice and often funny but they also take the viewers out of the reality of the show. I’m also still not a fan of Janine working for the District. I love teachers but I cannot stand bureaucrats. I also think, after three seasons, it might be time for Gregory to stop looking stunned by everything. It was funny at first but now, it’s just coming across as being a bit lazy.

That said, when this show works, it really does work. Mr. Johnson debating how AI will effect the future of janitoring made me laugh so hard that I had to get a drink of water to stop myself from choking to death.

Blind Date (YouTube)

I watched two episodes on Tuesday afternoon. No one found love.

Chappelle’s Show (Netflix)

On Sunday, I watched an episode in which Wayne Brady took over Dave Chappelle’s Show. Dave later talked about the time Wayne forced him to smoke crystal meth and murdered at least three people. It made me laugh.

Dirty Pair Flash (YouTube)

On Friday, I watched an episode in which the two main characters had to hide out at a private school, one that was haunted by a ghost. I related to Yuri’s enthusiasm.

Dr. Phil (YouTube)

On Tuesday afternoon, I watched an episode in which Phil talked to a white kid from the suburbs who thought he was a gangster. A real-life former gangster was brought on to talk to him about the “realities” of life on the street. I’ve never heard so much psycho-babble in my life.

The N.Y. Friars Club Roast of Chevy Chase (YouTube)

I read about this infamous 2002 Roast on Wednesday so I decided to watch it on Thursday. It’s true that the humor was brutal. I thought the roast of Michael Scott on The Office was brutal but it was nothing compared to what Chevy Chase was put through. It was kind of obvious that everyone involved had been waiting for a chance to let the world know how much they hated Chevy Chase. It was …. awkward. I’m just not a huge fan of the whole roast thing. It just seems mean!

Jenny Jones (YouTube)

On Monday, I watched a 1992 episode of this talk show. Easily flustered host Jenny Jones talked to teenage girls who were dating older boys and basically made things awkward by asking them to tell her and the entire audience about their first time.

The Phil Donahue Show (YouTube)

On Monday, I watched a 1993 episode of this ancient talk show. The pompous host talked to girls who were dating older men. Everyone was amazingly inarticulate.

Quiet On The Set (Max)

A four-part docuseries, Quiet On The Set took a look at the rise (and eventual fall) of Nickelodeon and television producer Dan Schneider. The centerpiece of the series was an episode-long interview with Drake Bell, in which he bravely discussed being sexually abused by Brian Peck, who was one of three Nickelodeon employees to be convicted of child sexual abuse over a short period of time.

While Drake was compelling and the series did a good job of detailing the toxic atmosphere on many of Schneider’s shows, the series also featured a few too many journalists and a few too many interviews with other former child stars who came across like they were mostly annoyed that their careers fizzled out. Dan Schneider comes across as being a terrible boss and a selfish human being but, at the same time, the series started out with an agenda and sometimes, I wondered how much of the narrative was shaped to fit that agenda.

In the end, the main thing I took away from watching this docuseries was the Nickelodeon really was as creepy as I always kind of suspected it of being.

Rollergames (YouTube)

I watched an episode of this old show on Saturday morning. The roller derby was brutal!

Sally Jessy Raphael (YouTube)

On Monday, I watched a two-part episode from 1993. Sally interviewed teen girls who were sexually active and basically spent two hours scolding them, There was also an army of virgins in the audience who would say stuff like, “I am a virgin,” and the audience would go crazy. It all felt very weird and judgmental. For someone who claimed to be a feminist, Sally sure was quick to judge her guests.

Trisha Goddard Show (YouTube)

I watched an episode of this talk show (which I had never heard of before) on Sunday night. Trisha Goddard, who was a kind of annoying British woman, talked to a 68 year-old woman whose deceased son was thought to be the father of two 27 year-old women. For some reason, a psychic was brought out to give her opinion. “I’m sensing the number three,” she said, for reasons that were never explained.

I watched another episode on Wednesday. It featured a man who refused to accept that he was the father of his ex-partner’s baby, even after a DNA test proved that he was. “That test could have been doctored!” he yelled while the audience gasped in shock.

Watched And Reviewed Elsewhere:

Baywatch Nights

Changing Patterns

Check It Out — Review to come shortly (unless I fall asleep)

CHiPs

Fantasy Island

Friday the 13th: The Series

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 1.18 “Cry Wolf”

Posted on March 18, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983. The entire show is currently streaming on Freevee!

This week, someone is calling in false emergencies and neither Baker nor Ponch are going to let him get away with it!

Episode 1.18 “Cry Wolf”

(Dir by John Florea, originally aired on February 16th, 1978)

A creepy weirdo named Walt (Brad David) is angry at the world. He hasn’t been able to get a job since he got out of prison and his sister is always giving him a hard time. Walt deals with his anger by driving up to police call boxes and phoning in reports of imaginary accidents. For every call, the fire department and the highway patrol waste precious recourses responding. Getraer wants the caller caught and he’s placed Jon in charge of the task force to take him down.

This is one of those episodes where the emphasis is on how all the various departments work together to keep people safe. Whenever Walt places a call, we’re presented with a montage of cops and firemen racing to be the first one to arrive at the “accident.” Though the show makes clear that Walt is not thinking straight and that he’s not in a good place mentally, the emphasis is still on how many resources are wasted on his calls.

It gets so bad that Jon and Ponch start to assume that every call is a prank. When someone calls in to say that a helicopter has crashed on the highway, Jon is shocked to discover that a helicopter actually has crashed. He and Ponch rush the plane’s cargo — rare blood for an operation — to a local hospital and are scolded for showing up late. That’s the danger of crying wolf. When Walt is finally caught by Baker and Ponch, he attempts to jump off a bridge. Baker and Ponch stop him, of course. As they pull him back to safety, Baker says that Walt is lucky they weren’t busy answering a false call.

This was a good episode for Baker, as he also got a subplot in which a minor motorcycle crash led to him meeting and dating an X-ray technician named Karen Rayburn (Kathryn Holcomb). Baker and Karen were a cute couple and there was something undeniably charming about how nervous Baker got whenever he had to flirt. Larry Wilcox was not the most expressive actor but his stiff demeanor was put to good use in this episode.

This was not a bad episode. Since the majority of the episode focused on one storyline, this episode felt more cohesive than some of the ones that came before it. As usual, the main highlight was watching Baker and Ponch weave their way in and out of traffic. The scenery was lovely and there was even an exploding helicopter! You can’t go wrong with that.

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 3/10/24 — 3/16/24

Posted on March 16, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

On Sunday, I discovered that there are hundreds of episodes of Blind Date on YouTube. Blind Date was an early reality show, where two strangers would be set up on a blind date and the cameras would follow them as they searched for a deeper connection. The show was distinguished by its snarky attitude, which was usually represented by thought balloons that would show what the two people were “really” thinking. While plenty of episodes featured likable people who went on good dates, the disastrous dates were always a lot more fun to watch.

And I’ve watched a lot of them this week. Whenever I’ve been bored or I’ve found myself struggling to focus, I’ve pulled up an episode of Blind Date and …. well, I’d be lying if I said the show was making me more productive. If anything, I’ve probably wasted a lot of time on it. But still, it makes me smile when I need to smile.

On Sunday, I also watched The Oscars. I wrote about the show here. For the most part, it was an entertaining show and I’m glad Christopher Nolan finally won his Oscar. I’ve been thinking a lot about Jonathan Glazer’s acceptance speech, of which I was not a fan. Zone of Interest is an important film and Glazer’s speech can’t change that. Still, I’m having to do now what I always tell me friends they should do whenever they discover one of their favorite directors or actors isn’t as much of a leftist as they are. I always tell them to stop whining and just separate the work from the artist. And now I’m discovering that is easier said than done. I may owe some of my friends an apology.

On Tuesday, I watched a 90s talk show called Rolanda. Rolanda interviewed gang members who wanted to come out of the closet.

On Wednesday, I was excited to watch both Survivor and The Amazing Race! Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to full concentrate on either show because I got a call halfway through Survivor but I plan on rewatching both episodes tomorrow. Survivor, I have to admit, hasn’t really worked for me lately. Ever since it came back from the Pandemic hiatus, Survivor has felt like a shadow of its past self. But I continue to unreservedly love The Amazing Race.

On Friday, I watched episodes of Vanishing Shadow and Night Flight on Night Flight Plus. The Night Flight episode featured film directors who made music videos. I’ve noticed that every episode of Night Flight finds an excuse to show Brian DePalma’s video for Relax and this episode was no different.

On Saturday morning, I watched the first episode of an old anime called Bubblegum Crash. I have no idea what was going on for most of it but a lot of stuff did blow up.

Also Watched And Reviewed Elsewhere:

Baywatch Nights

Check It Out! — Review upcoming

CHiPs

Fantasy Island

Friday the 13th: The Series

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 1.17 “Hitch-Hiking Hitch”

Posted on March 11, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Baker solves everything!

Episode 1.17 “Hitch-Hiking Hitch”

(Dir by Phil Bondelli, originally aired on February 9th, 1978)

It’s another crazy week on the highways of California.

Baker saves a wind sailor who loses control of his boat while testing it on the freeway. Baker saves a trucker when the brakes go out on his rig. Baker helps out an old man (George Chandler) who refuses to leave his home until he’s promised that he and his dog won’t be put in an assisted living facility. Baker tells two teenagers, Jenny (Lark Gein) and Marge (Stacy Nelkin), about the dangers of hitchhiking on the highways.

In other words, this is yet another first season episode of CHiPs where the main theme seems to be that Ponch is thoroughly useless. Oh, don’t get me wrong. Ponch definitely helps out. When Baker tells Ponch to direct traffic, Ponch hops off his motorcycle and starts waving at cars to either stop or go. But it’s still hard not to notice that, when something needs to be done, Baker is the one who does it. Indeed, Baker is usually the only one who knows how to do it. You have to kind of wonder why he’s not in charge since he always knows what to do.

Still, Sgt. Getraer is the man in charge and he’s been named “Sergeant of the Month” by CHiPs Magazine. Ponch and Baker are worried that Getraer is too humble to really enjoy the honor. For some reason, Ponch thinks that playing a joke on Getraer by switching out his helmet will make Getraer enjoy life more. It really doesn’t make much sense to me but this is Ponch that we’re talking about.

There’s an odd scene where Ponch and Baker are having lunch at a diner. A man in a van pulls up and sees that their bikes are in the parking spot that he wants. The man, who is rather large, picks up the bikes and puts them on the sidewalk. He then picks up a car and moves it to the side. Luckily, Getraer rolls up and gives the guy a ticket.

While Baker and Getraer are doing their jobs, Ponch is trying to get laid. When Mary Kate (Katherine Cannon) comes to the station to bail out her sister (who is one of the hitchhikers), Ponch takes one look at her and says, “I bet you were named after your grandmother, who was also very beautiful.” Mary Kate responds that she was named after two spinster aunts. She goes on a few dates with Ponch and claims that her sister has been led astray by her friend. It turns out Mary Kate is wrong and her sister is the one who keeps insisting on hitchhiking.

The hitchhiking nearly ends in disaster but fear not! Baker is there to save Marge from some creeps driving a van. Seriously, what would California do without Jon Baker?

Anyway, the scene with the out-of-control truck was kind of exciting but otherwise, this was a typical episode of CHiPs. It wasn’t particularly memorable but the California scenery was lovely to look at. Anyone want to go wind sailing?

PROGRAMMING NOTE: Retro Television Reviews Will Return On March 11th

Posted on March 3, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Hi, everyone! Lisa Marie here with a quick programming note!

For nearly two years, I’ve been posting daily retro television reviews here on the Lens. That feature is going on hiatus for this upcoming week so that this site can concentrate on the Oscars. Speaking for myself, I know that I have a lot that I need to watch and review before the Oscars are handed out on March 10!

So, my daily reviews of Miami Vice, Baywatch Nights, CHiPs, Fantasy Island, The Love Boat, Monsters, Highway to Heaven, T and T, Friday the 13th, Welcome Back Kotter, Check It Out, and Degrassi Junior High will return on March 11th, after Oscar week concludes!

For now, let’s watch some movies!

Late Night Retro Television Reviews: CHiPs 1.16 “Vintage ’54”

Posted on February 26, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, the key words on the highway of California are “team work!”

Episode 1.16 “Vintage ’54”

(Dir by Barry Crane, originally aired on January 26th, 1978)

It’s a three-day weekend and that means the California Highway Patrol even more mayhem to deal with than usual!

For instance, two car thieves are driving up and down the highway, searching for classic cars. One stolen car belongs to 85 year-old Margaret Downey (Marjorie Bennett), who proceeds to go down to the station and personally demand that Sgt. Getraer find her car. The thieves are eventually caught, thanks to the entire Highway Patrol working as a team and keeping an eye out for stolen cars. The emphasis here was on teamwork, which Ponch and Baker just doing their part as opposed to be singled out.

It’s also teamwork that reunites a baby with the family that accidentally left her behind at a rest stop. Ponch and Baker are the ones who take the baby to the station and they’re the ones who nickname the baby “Princess” and buy her toys but, in the end, it’s the entire Highway Patrol working together that eventually brings the baby back to her grateful parents.

Baker and Ponch do get a moment in the spotlight when a skydiver ends up getting tangled up and hanging from a highway overpass. Baker is the one who grabs hold of her legs to keep her from falling while Ponch is the one who recruits a crane to help rescue her. But again, Baker and Ponch are not working alone. Instead, there are other motorists who help out, some by holding onto Baker and another by allowing Ponch to use his crane.

My point is that this episode was all about people working together to make the world a better and a safer place. That’s not a bad message and the show delivers it with a good deal of sincerity. With the exception of the scenery-chewing Marjorie Bennett, everyone is on their best behavior with this episode, with even Erik Estrada toning down his usual overacting. And, of course, there’s two exciting motorcycle chases, both of which are very well-filmed. There was nothing particularly amazing about this episode. It was pretty much a typical hour of CHiPs but it was still very well-done.

Next week, Ponch and Baker have an important lesson to teach about hitchhiking!

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 2/18/24 — 2/24/24

Posted on February 24, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Greetings from Lake Texoma! It’s been a relaxing week and exactly what I needed. Here’s some thoughts on what I watched out on the deck.

Abbott Elementary (Wednesday Night, ABC)

“Janine smokes weed every day!”

Finally! After being slightly disappointed with the previous episodes of Abbott Elementary, this week’s episode was definitely a return to form! Whether it was all of the teachers talking about their drugs of choice or the hilarious FADE assembly, this episode epitomized everything that makes this show special. And while Janine smoking weed every day may seem a bit unexpected, it makes sense when you consider that she dated Tariq for ten years.

American Idol (Sunday Night, ABC)

Whenever American Idol starts a new season, I always find myself saying, “Is that show still on?” Seriously, it’s been a while since American Idol was a huge part of the cultural landscape and it’s been even longer since the show introduced America to genuine talents like Kelly Clarkson and Carrie Underwood.

This season got off to an odd start, with Ryan Seacrest saying that the previous winner had put his home state of Hawaii on the map. No, Ryan — I’m pretty sure people knew about Hawaii before American Idol. As I watched the rest of the first audition episode, it occurred to me that, once again, the judges were too concerned about their own image to really offer up any sort of constructive feedback. That’s one reason why a show like this needs someone who is willing to be brutally honest and who has nothing to lose by being the show’s “villain.” Simon Cowell was a brilliant judge because he could always just hop on a plane and head back to the UK if his criticism ever turned America against him. Katy Perry, Luke Bryan, and Lionel Richie, on the other hand, all have brands that are based on being likable and not destroying people’s dreams.

Everyone who auditioned had a tragic backstory and they all did that thing were they oversold the emotion of whatever they were singing. It was kind of boring, to be honest. It’s been a long time since the show has produced a true American idol.

Bubblegum Crisis (Night Flight Plus)

Jeff and I watched an episode of this anime on Saturday morning. I have no idea what was going on in the episode but a lot of stuff blew up.

Dr. Phil (YouTube)

On Thursday night, Jeff and I watched an episode in which a woman named Lynsey accused her ex of abusing their daughter. That Lynsey was lying was pretty obvious from the start. Eventually, Lynsey got angry and stormed off stage. She came back out a bit later and accused Dr. Phil of turning her story into a “circus.” Usually, I’m totally in favor of people giving Dr. Phil a hard time but, in this case, Lynsey really was the worst.

Lauren Lake’s Paternity Court (YouTube)

He was the father! Yay! I had an episode of this playing in the background on Friday morning while I was in the process of waking up.

Law & Order (Thursday Night, NBC)

After playing the role for almost as long as I’ve been alive, Sam Waterston played Jack McCoy for the last time this week. McCoy resigned as District Attorney in order to protect his subordinates from the political fall-out of prosecuting a friend of the Mayor’s. I would have liked to have seen McCoy retire on his own terms, as opposed to being forced out. Quitting in the face of political pressure felt out of character for Jack McCoy. And the fact that he resigned to protect Price and Maroun, neither one of whom really feels worthy of the sacrifice, only adds insult to injury.

I find it interesting that almost every episode of Law & Order seems to feature a wealthy murderer. Do poor people not commit crimes in New York City?

Maury (YouTube)

“You are the father!” “You are not the father!” “You’re going to be in this baby’s life, right?” “Oh, you know it, Maury!” I watched way too much Maury on Friday and I will never forgive myself.

Night Flight (Night Flight Plus)

On Friday night, Jeff and I watched a profile of Ozzy Osbourne and Black Sabbath.

The Vanishing Shadow (Night Flight Plus)

On Friday night, Jeff and I watched another episode of this 1930s serial. Our heroes spent the entire episode fleeing gangsters.

Watched and Reviewed Elsewhere:

Baywatch Nights
Check it Out (review will be dropping in 30 minutes)
CHiPs
Fantasy Island
Friday the 13th: The Series
Highway to Heaven
In The Lion’s Den
The Love Boat
Miami Vice
Monsters
T and T
Welcome Back, Kotter

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 1.15 “Surf’s Up”

Posted on February 19, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Ponch and Baker hit the beach!

Episode 1.15 “Surf’s Up”

(Dir by Georg Fenady, originally aired on January 19th, 1978)

At the beginning of this week’s episode, Ponch and Baker are miserable.

Los Angeles, the city that they’ve taken an oath to protect, is no longer as friendly as it once was. The highways are congested. The chases are long and tedious. The citizens don’t seem to appreciate the highway patrol’s hard work. When Baker is forced to throw a reckless driver on someone else’s hood in order to arrest him, the owner of the car (Fran Ryan) yells at him for scratching her car and threatens to sue the department.

Ponch and Baker need a break!

At first, Getraer is dismissive of their concerns. He points out, quite sensibly, that he can’t approve their request for a temporary transfer just because they’re having a bad day. They work in Los Angeles and not every day is going to be a perfect day.

“Thanks a lot, pal,” Ponch snaps.

“I’m your sergeant,” Getraer starts, “if you want a pal….”

“Join the Police Athletic League, we know,” Baker says.

Fortunately, for Ponch and John, the Malibu division has a few men who have gotten the flu so Getraer, realizing that he doesn’t want to have to listen to Ponch and Jon whine for a whole week, finally agrees to giving them a temporary transfer.

The rest of the episode follows Ponch and John as they patrol Malibu. It turns out that Malibu has the same problems as Los Angeles but it’s also closer to the beach. (“You can hear the ocean from headquarters!” an excited Ponch says.) Not only do Ponch and Baker stop a car theft (and save the baby who was trapped in the back seat) but they also catch a gang of van thieves. Ponch also takes a few kids from the neighborhood to Disneyland, in order to make up for having incorrectly accused one of them of having stolen a radio and bunch of sunflowers.

Of course, we don’t actually see Ponch at Disneyland. We just hear about afterwards. What we do see is Ponch and Baker hanging out on the beach and trying out a jet ski. As I watched this episode, it occurred to me that CHiPs really wasn’t a police show as much as it was an hour long commercial for California. The theme of this episode appeared to be, “Even if Los Angeles is too crowded and smoggy for you, you can still go to Malibu, meet and date two flight attendants, and conquer the ocean on a jet ski!” And really, this show is at its most effective when it focuses on being a travelogue. I imagine quite a few people watched this episode in 1978 and thought to themselves, “I have to get to Malibu!”

Scenery aside, this is a bit of a dull episode. The van thieves were not particularly impressive villains and even the show’s famous chase scenes felt a bit perfunctory. As a drama, this episode fell flat but it worked wonderfully as a commercial.

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 2/11/24 — 2/17/24

Posted on February 17, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This was another week in which I didn’t watch much television, beyond what I usually review. A lot of that is because I was preoccupied with exercising my ankle (which is doing much better) and Valentine’s Day! And some of it is because I guess modern television just doesn’t interest me that much right now. All the game shows and the self-conscious prestige dramas are just kind of boring.

Anyway, here’s some thought on what I did watch this week!

Abbott Elementary (Wednesday Night, ABC)

I felt that this week’s episode was a clear improvement over the premiere, though the show still seems to be struggling to find its footing in the third season. I liked Gregory as the cool teacher and I enjoyed the return of Tariq but I’m still not a fan of Janine working for the district.

Bubblegum Crisis (Night Flight Plus)

The action moved to Houston in the episode that I watched on Saturday morning. As usual, I couldn’t really follow the plot but it was fun to watch everything explode. Bubblegum Crisis takes place in 2033 so I guess we’ve got nine years left.

Diocese Of Dallas Catholic Mass (Sunday Afternoon, Channel 27)

For various reasons, I really wanted to go to Mass on Sunday but with my sprained ankle, I really didn’t feel like having to hop all the way down to St. Joseph’s. Fortunately, television to the rescue!

Dr. Phil (YouTube)

I watched an episode on Monday night. A woman falsely accused her ex-husband of using their child to make pornographic movies. Her husband passed a lie detector test and, as Phil pointed out, the woman’s story was full of inconsistencies and never made any sense. Despite being exposed as being a liar, the woman refused to apologize.

On Saturday, I watched an episode that featured an online gambling addict who, having lost all of his money, was now living in his mother’s basement. “We are staging an intervention,” Dr. Phil said, in that ultra-dramatic way of his.

Night Flight (Night Flight Plus)

This Friday, I watched an episode about famous people who made cameo appearances in 80s music videos.

The Super Bowl (Sunday Night, CBS)

I have to admit that I was really rooting for the 49ers by the end of the game. I always like it when the underdogs win. But still, congratulations to the Chiefs on their victory. As usual, I was mostly watching for the commercials but I got kind of bored with them this year. The one with Jennifer Lopez, Ben Affleck, and Matt Damon was amusing.

The Vanishing Shadow (Night Flight Plus)

I watched another installment of this old timey serial on Saturday morning. Our heroes spent most of this episode being pursued by gangsters. Fortunately, they had a vanishing ray! This old 30s serial is a lot of fun.

Watched and Reviewed Elsewhere:

Baywatch Nights (YouTube)
Check It Out (Tubi) — Review Dropping In 30 Minutes
CHiPs (Freevee)
Degrassi Junior High (YouTube)
Fantasy Island (Daily Motion)
Friday the 13th (YouTube)
Highway to Heaven (Freevee)
Lookwell (YouTube)
The Love Boat (Paramount Plus)
Miami Vice (Tubi)
Monsters (Tubi)
T and T (Tubi)
Welcome Back Kotter (Tubi)

Late Night Retro Television Reviews: CHiPs 1.14 “Rustling”

Posted on February 12, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, CHiPs makes me cry!

Episode 1.14 “Rustling”

(Dir by Phil Bondelli, originally aired on January 12th, 1978)

This week’s episode of CHiPs featured a scene that brought tears to my mismatched eyes.

A drunk driver (played by G.W. Bailey) swerves across the highway and causes another car to flip over. While Ponch chases after the driver, Baker goes to investigate the crash. He discovers that the car’s driver is a 17 year-old girl named Susie (Pamelyn Ferdin) and she has been pinned under the wreckage. He manages to free her and carry her away from the car before it explodes. YAY! Another life saved by Jon Baker, right?

That’s when Susie says that she can’t feel her legs.

That scene got to me. It was far more well-acted than anything that I think one would normally expect to find on a episode of CHiPs, with both Ferdin and Larry Wilcox bringing a lot of emotional sincerity to their roles. Susie realizes that she may never walk again. Baker realizes that, just because he saved her from the car, he can’t save Susie from the other consequences of the accident. I wanted to cry. Actually, I did cry.

Now, I should admit that I’m recovering from a sprained ankle and I was doing my ankle exercises while watching this scene. So, not only did I already have tears in my eyes (seriously, some of those exercises hurt!) but I was also feeling pretty emotional. But still, even if I was just watching this scene while sitting on a couch, I think it would have had the same effect on me.

Of course, for the record, Ponch does capture the drunk driver (and the driver starts to sob when he realizes what he has done). And, by the end of the episode, Baker is informed that Susie is going to be okay. I was happy about that.

Excuse me, I’m starting to cry again….

Okay, believe it or not, that was only a small part of the episode. The main storyline featured the great L.Q. Jones as a cattle rustler who, when he’s not driving his truck full of stolen cattle, rides a motorcycle. Fortunately, after a lengthy chase, Baker and Ponch are able to capture him and his accomplice (Paul Tuerpe). It was a pretty simple story but, at the same time, L.Q. Jones was one of those brilliant character actors who make even the most mundane of characters interesting.

Also, over the course of the episode, Ponch and Baker deal with an irate driver (Mill Watson) who claims that he was only speeding because his gear shift failed. In court, Ponch is able to prove that the gear shift didn’t break by pointing out that the brake lights would have come on in that case. (“Your honor,” the defense attorney says, “my client would like to change his plea to guilty.”) Ponch and Baker also stop a magician and his assistant and are so fascinated by the magician’s tricks that they nearly forget to write his assistant a ticket.

Finally, Ponch arranges for everyone to meet at Baker’s apartment to throw him a surprise birthday party. Whoops! Baker’s birthday isn’t for another three months. Ponch looked at Baker’s personnel file and misread his employment number as being his birthdate. Oh, Ponch! Still, the party is a success. Getraer shows up with zucchini. The magician shows up and performs a trick that involves tossing milk on Ponch and Baker. What? Well, whatever.

What’s important is that one scene that brought tears my eyes. The rest of the episode may have been generic but that one scene was beautifully done and I’ll never forget it.