Horror Book Review: You Are A Cat In The Zombie Apocalypse by Sherwin Tija


Have you ever wondered what it’s like to be a cat?

Sure, we all have!

Have you ever wondered what it’s like to be in the middle of a zombie apocalypse?

Who hasn’t?

Well, now, you can get the answer to both questions!  First published in 2011, You Are A Cat In The Zombie Apocalypse is a “pick-a-plot” book.  It’s one of those books where, at the end of each page, you’re given a series of options.  For instance, at the bottom of Page 120, we have, “Do you run?  If so, take off to page 169.  If you stay put, turn to page 123.”

In this book, you’re a cat named Holden Catfield.  One day, you’re just waking up from a nap.  You’re minding your own business.  You’re just being a cat, basically.  Suddenly, all the humans are acting strange.  Weird-looking people are wandering the streets and biting each other!  Your owner’s daughter wants you to get in a car with her and a stranger so you can all go somewhere else.  Do you get in the car or do you explore your neighborhood?

That’s the first of many choices that you’ll have to make.  They’re important choices because, if you do happen to find yourself in a situation where you get bitten by a weird human, you’ll turn into a zombie yourself.  And then you’ll  be the one looking for people to bite…

Now, our longtime readers know that I’m both a cat person and a lover of zombie films.  So, needless to say, I totally and completely loved You Are A Cat In The Zombie Apocalypse!  Not only does this book capture what it’s like to be a cat but it also does a pretty good job of capturing what I imagine it’s like to be a zombie.  Don’t worry, though.  Make the right choices and Holden will never turn into a zombie.

You Are A Cat In The Zombie Apocalypse was written and illustrated by Sherwin Tija, who did an excellent job on both counts.  The book ends with a collection of “Catknowldgements” and a page that tells about the “Meowthur” and the “Mewllustrator.”  If you’re a cat person, you’ll love it.

4 Shots From 4 Films: Breakfast at Tiffany’s, Inferno, Cat’s Eye, Sleepwalkers


Happy International Cat Day from the Shattered Lens!

4 Shots From 4 Films

Breakfast at Tiffany’s (1961, dir by Blake Edwards)

Inferno (1980, dir by Dario Argento)

Cat’s Eye (1985, dir by Lewis Teague)

Sleepwalkers (1992, dir by Mick Garris)

Catnip party at my place!

Happy Father’s Day From The Shattered Lens!


As much as I hate to admit it, male cats are notoriously bad fathers.  9 out of 10 male cats will abandon both their mate and their kittens and many male cats end up fathering and abandoning multiple kittens with different females.  Male cats are often so resistant to taking on the demands of fatherhood that any attempt to force them to accept responsibility will lead to hissing, growling, and occasionally clawing.

Some humans, however, have done better.  In fact, there’s even a few good fathers who write for this site!  To them, we say Happy Father’s Day from the Shattered Lens!

Happy Godfather Day, too!

 

Thank You!


To our wonderful readers:

We hope you have enjoyed Christmas here on the Shattered Lens!  Today is not only Christmas but it’s also the 7-year anniversary of the founding of this website!  Thank you to everyone who has every read a post, left a comment, or decided to subscribe!  As much fun as it is for us to share our opinions, it’s the readers who make all of this worthwhile!

We know that 2016 has been a difficult year for many of you.  It’s been a difficult year for some members our own family as well.  However, 2016 is nearly over.  And we’re going to do everything we can to make 2017 a good one for everyone!

With all that in mind, thank you for reading and we hope you’ll continue to read in the future!

Y’all are the best!

And now, as Christmas ends, here’s one final gift to you.  Here’s a video of a Jedi kitten, courtesy of Zach King, aka FinalCutKing.  Zach may not have won the Amazing Race but he certainly knows how to make adorable kittens do amazing things!

ENJOY!

And now a Special Halloween Message From Doc Bowman…


Hi there!  It’s nearly Halloween, which is when humans beg for treats!  Why do humans only beg for treats one night out of the week?  Me, I get treats every time I come inside, go out, wake up from a nap, or sit in the kitchen and go, “Meh.”  That’s the power of being a cute kitty!

Anyway, I wanted to remind everyone that not all humans are nice on Halloween night so be sure to keep your pets — your dogs, your possums, your cats, and especially your black cats! — inside tomorrow night!  The flame-haired one and the nice one both say that there’s no way they’re letting me outside tonight, no matter how much I beg!  Meh!

As a reward for keeping your pets safe on Halloween, here are two horror movies recreated by kittens and our friends at the Pet Collective!

 

Doc Bowman Takes A Look At The Trailer For Are We Not Cats


OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

I was super excited to see a trailer called Are We Not Cats because I thought it would be about me!  But then I watched it and there’s no cats at all in this trailer!  Meh!

According to the description on YouTube: “After losing his job, his girlfriend, and his apartment in a single day, a young man attempts to restart his life, but is diverted when he meets a woman who shares his strangest habit; an inclination for eating hair!” Eating hair does not make you a cat!  Grooming is not the same as eating, silly humans!  Meh!

Here is the trailer!  It doesn’t have a U.S. release date yet but the movie opened in Italy on Friday!  There’s a lot of good cats in Italy but they’re not allowed in theaters!  Meh!

The Cutest Version of Gone Girl That You’ll Ever See!


Let’s take just a small break from horror and instead, let’s watch something that’s really cute.  And kinda horrific.  Here’s is the Pet Collective’s version of Gone Girl!

(And be sure to check out the Pet Collective’s version of Boyhood as well!)

The Greatest Thing Ever To Show Up On YouTube


Believe it or not, I can occasionally be a little bit moody.  Sometimes, I simply get a frown on my face and not even all the Italian horror films in the world can turn that frown into a smile.  I’m like a lot of people in that I’ve always had to battle that creeping depression and I hate that feeling.

Luckily, whenever I start to feel sad, I go to YouTube and I watch the greatest viral video of all time.  Now, I know that some people will always debate whether or not a 3-minute viral video deserves to be considered entertainment in the same way as a 2-hour film and a 22-episode season of a well-written television series.  I can see both sides of the argument but ultimately, it comes down to the one thing.  The video below never fails to make me feel happy.

Without further ado, here’s my favorite YouTube video of all time: Noisy Kittens Waiting For Dinner!

By the way, I know that most people seem to like the jumpy kitten the best but I think they’re all adorable.  The little quiet orange one is just simply to die for.