Author Archives: Jedadiah Leland

Game Review: Fight Forever (2020, Pako)

Posted on by Jedadiah Leland

Fight Forever is an entrant in the 2020 Interactive Fiction Competition.  All of the entries can be browsed and played here.

In this old school, text-based fight simulator, you pick your fighter, you pick your trainer, and then you hope to have a legendary career.  Pick your training regimen.  Decide which fight camp to attend.  Take a chance living your life and seeing what happens.  (The booty call option either works out really well or totally messes you up.)  Toss in a few random intangibles and you’re ready to fight!

I was surprised by how enjoyable Fight Forever turned out to be.  Even though you can’t control what your fighter does in the ring, you can control the training and the strategizing that goes on before he enters that ring and it’s surprisingly satisfying to discover whether or not it paid off.  Make the right decisions and you can move up in the world.  Make the wrong decisions and you’ll probably die after three fights.

According the game’s creator, Fight Forever is stage one in what he hopes to develop into a much more elaborate fighting game.  I hope he continues to develop it because, even incomplete, what he has now is incredibly addictive.

Fight Forever can be played here.

Music Video of the Day: It’s A Sin by The Pet Shop Boys (1987, directed by Derek Jarman)

Posted on by Jedadiah Leland

For all the analysis that has been dedicated to this song and Neil Tennant’s reasons for writing it, Tennant himself has said that the song itself isn’t as a serious as everyone makes it out to be.  As he explained it in a 2009 interview with Andrew Sullivan:

“People took it really seriously; the song was written in about 15 minutes, and was intended as a camp joke and it wasn’t something I consciously took very seriously. Sometimes I wonder if there was more to it then I thought at the time. But the local parish priest in Newcastle delivered a sermon on it, and reflected on how the Church changed from the promise of a ghastly hell to the message of love.”

Not surprisingly, the video is full of religious imagery, along with representations of the seven deadly sins.  In the video, Tennant’s fellow Pet Shop Boy, Chris Lowe, plays Tennant’s jailer while the judge is played by the distinguished British actor Ron Moody.  An Oscar nominee for playing Fagin in 1968’s Oliver!, Ron Moody also came very close to being cast as the Third Doctor on Doctor Who.  Though the role was offered to him, Moody turned it down to focus on his film career.  Instead, Moody’s friend, Jon Pertwee, received the role and Moody would often later say that the decision to turn down Doctor Who was one of his biggest mistakes.

This video was directed by Derek Jarman, the experimental British director who is perhaps best known for his adaptation of Christopher Marlowe’s Edward II.  A political activist and a pioneer in the British gay rights movement, Jarman would sadly pass away just seven years after directing the video but he left behind a body of work that continues to be influential to this day.  Along with directing Laurence Olivier in his final performance (in War Requiem), Jarman is also often credited with having “discovered” Tilda Swinton.

It’s A Sin was one of the Pet Shops Boys’s biggest hits.  Would it have been a hit without this video?  Probably.  But the video definitely didn’t hurt.

Enjoy!

Witchcraft 15: Blood Rose (2016, directed by David Palmieri)

Posted on by Jedadiah Leland

I’m nearly done reviewing Witchcraft films and it’s not a moment too soon.  Because nearly every single installment has shared the same weaknesses (and the same “strengths”), I’m running out of things to say about them.  Even though I appreciate the franchise’s attempts to maintain a loose continuity over the course of 16 films and nearly 20 years, it can still be difficult to remember which Witchcraft was which.  When did Lutz go to London?  I think that was Witchcraft X.  When was Will dead?  That was Witchcrafts VII, VIII, and IX.  But don’t ask me what happened in Witchcraft V or VI.  It’s all just one big blur of softcore sex and needlessly complex rituals.

Witchcraft 15 picks up right where Witchcraft 14 ended.  Witchcraft 15 even opens by reshowing us the final ten minutes of Witchcraft 14, albeit with scenes of a lesbian witch ritual spliced in.  Samuel, the warlock yoga instructor, has been vanquished.  Sharon (Noel VanBrocklin) has taken over the yoga coven and, because Sharon’s managed to convince everyone that she wasn’t really that involved with Samuel’s attempts to bring the Angel of Death out of Hell, young witch Rose (Molly Dougherty), takes a job at the studio.  However, Sharon is still up to her old tricks so she occasionally possesses Rose’s body so that she can steal the souls of other witches and ultimately bring Samuel back to life.  It makes no sense but, after you’ve seen enough of these movies, you learn to tolerate incoherence.

Detectives Lutz and Garner (Berta Roberts and LeRoy Castanon) are again investigating all of the mysterious deaths that are occurring because of the latest witch scheme.  Will (Ryan Cleary) shows up to help them with the investigation.  Will is no longer conflicted about his heritage or his past and he now moves around and talks like he’s the star of his own show on the CW.  It all leads to another needlessly complex ceremony and a magical showdown.

Witchcraft 15 is stupid and trashy but it’s a Witchcraft film so that’s to be expected.  Ryan Cleary is still not a convincing Will and even Lutz and Garner’s trademark banter feels forced.  I do think that Rose and the yoga studio could have been interesting if the film was actually interested in any of that but Witchcraft 15 is ultimately just about getting the witches naked and cashing in on whatever nostalgia direct-to-video hounds might have for the Witchcraft franchise.

I’ve got one one more of these to go.  Tomorrow — Witchcraft 16!

Game Review: The Call of Innsmouth (2020, Tripper McCarthy)

Posted on by Jedadiah Leland

The game is an entrant in the 2020 Interactive Fiction Competition.  All of the entries can be played here!

You are a private detective, working out of Arkham, Massachusetts.  Arkham is a town that’s notorious for its many mysteries.  The locals say that it is a town that’s been touched by the paranormal but you’re a detective.  You deal with the real world.  When a distraught mother hires you to find her missing son, you think that it will just be a routine case.  Instead, it leads you to the decaying port town of Innsmouth, a place that makes even Arkham look normal!

A prequel to H.P. Lovecraft’s The Shadow over Innsmouth, The Call of Innsmouth has all the elements that you would expect from a Lovecraft game.  There’s a trip to Miskatonic University.  There are references to cults, Cthulhu, and the search for ancient and maddening knowledge.  You can even chose to read the Necronomicon if you’re so inclined.  The game warns you not to read it but ultimately, the choice is yours.  Don’t worry though.  If you go crazy or get sacrificed, you always have the option to go back and make a different and hopefully better decision.  That’s a choice that most Lovecraft heroes don’t get.

I enjoyed this Twine game.  The Cthulhu mythos are always good source material for Interactive Fiction and The Call of Innsmouth does a great job of capturing the atmosphere of one of Lovecraft’s stories.  The Call of Innsmouth is a mystery and a game worth exploring.

It can be played here.

Cinemax Friday: Witchcraft 14: Angel of Death (2016, directed by David Palmeiri)

Posted on by Jedadiah Leland

Eight years since his last appearance, warlock-turned-attorney Will Spanner is back!

A record eight years passed between the release of Witchcraft 13 and this installment, enough time for the franchise to go from being a cheap joke to something that people looked back on with nostalgia.  All of the your old favorites are back, with the exception of Kelly.  This time, Berna Roberts plays Lutz and Leroy Castanon plays Garner.  Will is played by Ryan Cleary, who has apparently not only come to terms with his warlock heritage but who is also now wearing guyliner.

There’s a series of deaths in Los Angeles, all involving people who know and who have displeased Rose (Molly Daughtery).  Rose is a witch but doesn’t realize it.  When she discovers that her boyfriend is cheating on her, she gets so angry that her powers destroy not only her boyfriend but also the woman that he was cheating with.  With people dying around her, Rose is starting to catch on that she might be a witch and she’s concerned about it.  Samuel (Jeremy Sykes) is the nefarious owner of a yoga studio who wants to use Rose’s powers for his own evil ends.  He sends a coven of witches to recruit her.  It’s all a part of another stupidly complex ritual, this one designed to release the Angel of Death from Hell.  As usual, it falls to Will to prevent the ritual.

Despite the eight year gap between the last chapter and Witchcraft 14, not much has changed as far as the Witchcraft movies are concerned.  The special effects are cheap, the nudity is frequent, and the plot has so many holes that the Angel of Death could probably just slip through one of them and save Samuel a lot of trouble.  The main thing that Witchcraft 14 does have going for it is that it’s more intentionally comedic than some of the previous Witchcraft films.  Samuel may be a Satanist but he and his yoga-based coven are also the epitome of almost every cliché about spacey Californians.  Roberts and Castanon also have good comedic timing as Lutz and Garner. As for Ryan Cleary, he sleepwalks through the role of Will but Lutz and Garner actually get more screen time than he does.

Despite the 8-year gap between installments, Witchcraft 14 is a typical Witchcraft film, just with more intentional laughs.  Those who have nostalgia for the series will probably enjoy it.  Everyone else will just wonder how they could have possible made 16 of these films.

Game Review: Academic Pursuits (as opposed to regular pursuits) (2020, ruqiyah)

Posted on by Jedadiah Leland

This game is an entrant in the 2020 Interactive Fiction Competition.  All of the entries can be browsed and played here.

You have just received a position in a prestigious university’s architecture department.  As was mentioned in your acceptance letter, it’s a role that you can “sink your teeth into.”  You’ve just arrived at your office, which is pretty bare.  Someone even took the curtains and the chair.  You’ve got plans for your new job and one colleague in particular but before you can worry about any of that, it’s time unpack.

Academic Pursuits in a moving-in sim, where the challenge is to not only find an appropriate place for all of your things but also to give your office the right feel.  Will you make you office feel academic or will you make it feel ominous?  While you’re unpacking, you can also examine each object and, even more importantly, think about each object.  Gradually, your backstory and your reasons for taking the position will be revealed.  Let’s just say that you’re more than just an academic looking to enlighten young minds.  How you decorate your office and what you decide to keep will also determine the future of both your career and your relationship/rivalry with another professor.

Academic Pursuits a simple but satisfying game.  I especially liked the way that the office changed depending on what you threw away and what you actually put on display.  Because there’s so many different ways to unpack (and yes, you do have the option to throw almost everything away), this is a game that can be played and replayed several times.

You can play it here.

Witchcraft 13: Blood of the Chosen (2008, directed by Mel House)

Posted on by Jedadiah Leland

Six years after the release of the last Witchcraft film, warlock-attorney Will Spanner is back for the 13th chapter in the Witchcraft saga.

This time, Will is played by Tim Wrobel, who gives a better-than-average performance as the conflicted warlock.  Wrobel actually seems to take the role and Will’s mixed feelings about being a warlock seriously and that’s definitely a step up from some of the other actors who have played the role.  In Blood of the Chosen, yet another cult of frequently nude female occultists is picking up and sacrificing men.  Most of their victims are somehow connected to Will.  It’s all because the cult wants Will to impregnate one of them so that their child will grow up to be the new Dark Lord who will bring Satan to Earth.  It’s yet another stupidly complicated ritual to overthrow the natural order.  Typical Witchcraft plot.

What sets Witchcraft 13 apart is that it is full of references to the previous Witchcraft films, as if the film was actually made in an attempt to iron out all of the dropped subplots and continuity errors that had piled up over the past 18 years.  Will mentions his ex-fiancée Kelly and how she couldn’t handle him being a warlock.  He talks about Detectives Garner and Lutz and finally clears up how Lutz went from being male in one film to female in another.  (It turns out that Lucy Lutz was the sister of the original Detective Lutz.)  He even mentions that he previously battled a temptress named Delores.  That was all the way back in the second movie!  One thing that Will does not clear up is why everyone forgot that he was dead in Witchcraft IX but it’s still better than nothing.

Witchcraft XIII clears up so many loose ends that it seems like it was designed to be the final chapter in the Witchcraft franchise.  It would not have been a bad one to go out on.  It’s better acted than the average Witchcraft movie, the story makes a little bit of sense, and Will finally seems to be ready to accept who he is.  That doesn’t mean that Witchcraft XIII is a great movie, of course.  It’s basically just something that someone shot on a camcorder for next to no money.  But as far as Witchcraft movies go, it’s one of the better ones.

For the longest time, this was the final chapter.  However, in 2016, three more Witchcraft films would finally be released.

Game Review: The Cave (2020, Neil Aitkin)

Posted on by Jedadiah Leland

The Cave is an entrant in the 2020 Interactive Fiction Competition.  All the of the entries can be played here.

You are an adventurer who wakes up to discover that you are surrounded by darkness.  You’re alone and you’re in a cave.  Can you figure out how to get out?

Like many Interactive Fiction games, The Cave is made up of separate rooms, each one of which has its own unique challenges and rewards.  What sets The Cave apart from other games is that, each time you play, the cave is randomly respawned.  Just because a room is nearby the first time you play, that doesn’t mean that it will still be there the next time you play.  As a result, no matter how many times you play, you’ll always have a different experience.

With each puzzle you solve, you gain knowledge and attributes.  You can’t die in The Cave.  The game is not designed to trick you into losing.  Instead, the goal is to see what type of person (or character) you’ve become once you finally manage to make your way out of the cage.  Will you be clever mage who emerges from the cave with several different spells or will you be the type of fighter who just keeps smashing away until you finally broken free?  Play the game to find out.  As the game puts it, “Who are you really in the dark?”

The Cave can be played here.

Witchcraft XII: In The Lair of The Serpent (2002, directed by Brad Sykes)

Posted on by Jedadiah Leland

Warlock-turned-attorney-turned investigator Will Spanner returns in this, the 12th Witchcraft film.

Now blandly played by a comedian named Chip James, Will may be back but the rest of the usual suspects are missing and, in fact, aren’t even mentioned in this film.  No Lutz.  No Garner.  No Kelli, despite the fact that Witchcraft XI ended with Will and Kelli finally getting engaged.  There’s was a two year gap between this film and the previous Witchcraft film and I guess a lot of could have happened during that time period.  In this Witchcraft, Will doesn’t say anything about being married and he ends up having sex with another woman so I’m going to guess that things didn’t work out with Will and Kelli.  Maybe Kelli finally got tired of every warlock on the west coast trying to abduct her during ever lunar eclipse.

Like so many of the Witchcraft films, In The Lair of the Serpent opens with someone picking up a beautiful woman outside of a nightclub.  This time, it’s Jeff Lawton (Bruce Blauer) who picks up Tisa (Monika Wild).  Tisa is a part of a cult of women who worship an ancient snake goddess.  Tisa and her fellow snake worshippers spend their time picking up men, seducing them, and then sacrificing them as a part of a complex ritual designed to bring the snake goddess into the world.  It’s good to see that Satan is not the only deity who demands that his followers engage in overly complex rituals before he’ll even think of meeting with them.

Jeff Lawton’s sister, Cindy (Janet Keijser), turns to Will to help solve the mystery of Jeff’s murder.  (Conveniently, Will is an old family friend.)  Since the last time we saw Will, he had apparently moved his legal practice to Seattle.  He returns to Long Beach for Jeff’s funeral and, convinced that the police don’t understand what they’re dealing with, he helps Cindy to investigate her brother’s death.  Will also hooks up with Cindy, a move that leaves those of us who have actually watched the other films in this stupid franchise wondering whether or not Kelly is up in Seattle, waiting for her husband to come back home.  It all leads to the usual magical battle between Will and the coven.

The special effects aren’t terrible, which is a step up from the previous Witchcraft films, and Janet Keijser is actually pretty good as Cindy.  Even the supernatural killer looks like a genuine otherworldly creature instead of someone wearing a rubber mask.  By the admittedly low standards of this franchise, Witchcraft XII almost feels like a real movie.  Almost!

By the time this one came around, the Witchcraft series was no longer as popular as it once was.  Softcore direct-to-video thrillers became less of a big deal as more and more people gained access to the Internet, which is a roundabout way of saying that Witchcraft‘s target audience no longer had to go the video store if they wanted to see a topless actress.  They could just search the web.  It would be six years before there was another chapter in the life of Will Spanner.

Game Review: Standing On The Shoulders of Giants (2020, Illum Eggert)

Posted on by Jedadiah Leland

This game is an entrant in the 2020 Interactive Fiction Competition.  All of the entries can be played here.

In this game, the player takes on the role of 17th century scientist Isaac Newton.  Newton has just received a mysterious letter from a woman who he doesn’t know, asking him to come to a cottage.  When Isaac goes to the college, the man of science meets a woman of magic and he soon finds himself in the future (i.e., our present).  Can Isaac solve the puzzles of the modern age and then return to his own time?

Standing On The Shoulders of Giants is a simple work of Interactive Fiction.  It comes with a walk-through but most players shouldn’t need to use it.  The walk-through itself states that the game is designed to be easy and that there’s no way the player can get a bad ending.  This game is less about solving puzzles and more about experimenting and seeing what will happen.  For instance, when you find yourself in the library, take the time to search for a few familiar authors.  You might be surprised with what comes up.

As I said, it’s a simple game.  If you’ve never played an IF game before, this would be a good one to start with.  It’s a likable adventure, especially if you know anything about the works of Newton and Einstein.

The game can be played here.