4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films is all about letting the visuals do the talking.
4 Shots From 4 Films
Forbidden Photos Of A Lady Above Suspicion (1970, directed by Luciano Ercoli)
Torso (1973, directed by Sergio Martino)
Spasmo (1974, directed by Umberto Lenzi)
The House With Laughing Windows (1976, directed by Pupi Avati)
Let’s be honest : when it comes to balls-out post-apocalyptic action, few people can do it like the Aussies. This fine cinematic tradition dates all the way back to George Miller’s original Mad Max, and continues in fine form to this day not only with the recently-released Mad Max : Fury Road, but with last year’s much-more-modestly-budgeted indie feature Wyrmwood : Road Of The Dead (or, as it was more simply titled for theatrical release in its country of origin, Wyrmwood), a true labor of love shot on weekends over a four-year span by co-writer (along with his brother, Tristan)/director Kiah Roache-Turner that one-ups Miller, at least on a purely conceptual level, by throwing zombies into the mix, as well.
When the infection (and by the way, kudos to the Roache-Turners for adding the cool effect of having their undead breathe a sort of greenish gas) hits…
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Well, are you? Huh? Are you?
Nah, I’m not, either (yours or mine), so let’s just talk about someone else’s shall we? Better yet, let’s talk about somebody who’s altogether fictitious, so we can all be nice and comfortable.
Specifically, let’s talk about 16-year-old Carson Morris (played by Lara Vosburgh), the subject of director Seth Grossman’s 2014 “found footage” indie-horror Inner Demons, who was apparently once a bright and promising young girl, but fell in with the wrong crowd once her admittedly dysfunctional parents (dad’s a lush, mom’s a religious fanatic) started sending her to a prestigious Catholic prep school that strikes me more as the sort of place you enroll your kid in to get them away from the wrong crowd, but whatever.
Little Carson’s just not the same anymore. She dresses in black and wears “goth” makeup and listens to heavy metal music and, of course…
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Admit it : Jason Bateman has been playing smug, insincere assholes for so long now (am I the only one old enough to remember him as Derek on Silver Spoons?) that you just sort of assume he must be one in real life himself. Which isn’t to say that he’s been a “one-note Johnny” his entire career, but —oh, who the hell are we kidding? Of course he has. But he does it so damn well that I honestly don’t hold the fact that he’s never exactly “branched out” against him.
Here’s the thing though — for whatever reason, he’s pretty much always confined his shtick to the comedy genre (specifically the TV sitcom), and as a result, his characters have always been relatively redeemable. Yeah, he’s gonna stab you in the back, get one over on you, and generally fuck up your life, but gosh — he just…
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Satire ran rampant in the 70s. Magazines like MAD and NATIONAL LAMPOON were eagerly devoured by hungry youth disillusioned with the status quo, while SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE and MONTY PYTHON’S FLYING CIRCUS kept us glued to our TV sets for must-watch comic nonsense. Moviegoers were treated to such farcical fare as THE GROOVE TUBE (1974), TUNNELVISION (1976), and LOOSE SHOES (1980). But without question, the side-splittingly funniest of them all was THE KENTUCKY FRIED MOVIE.
KFM (as I’ll pretensiously call it) was the brainchild of David Zucker, Jim Abrahams, and Jerry Zucker, those geniuses behind AIRPLANE! The trio of comic terrorists first got together as college chums in a theatrical troupe known as The Kentucky Fried Theater. Making a name for themselves as unbridled smart-alecs taking potshots at everything in sight, they developed this hilarious gumbo of outrageous skits with the help of a young director named John Landis, whose only previous credit in the director’s chair was the horror spoof SCHLOCK!…
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HeartBeeps (1981)
Stars:
Andy Kaufman *died* May 16, 1984
Bernadette Peters (Ally McBeal; Ugly Betty; Smash)
Randy Quaid (King Pin; Independence day)
Director Allan Arkush
Plot:
Val (Andy) and Aqua (Bernadette) are servant robots who fall in love with each other..
Now, how do they procede? Just as you would expect them too. Or do they?
My Thoughts:
As much as I want to be in love with Aqua, she has her own problems. As a SciFi comedy it works! I wanted to hate this movie when I started watching it, but by the end … Yeah, you might want to watch it too!
TV news you can use!
The TCA (Television Critics Association) Awards were this week and I really want to talk about TV! A lot of news came out this week! But I will make this brief.
Casting News
According to Time, Season 2 of ‘Empire‘ will feature guest star appearances by Kelly Rowland (Destiny’s Child), Marisa Tomei (My Cousin Vinny), Chris Rock, Lenny Kravitz, Alicia Keys, Common, Oprah. and Pitbull (http://time.com/3947847/kelly-rowland-marisa-tomei-empire-season-two/)
Peter Gallagher (Covert Affairs; Rescue Me) joins the cast of the Emmy award-winning ‘The Good Wife‘. in a recurring role. according to Deadline http://deadline.com/2015/08/peter-gallagher-cast-the-good-wife-recurring-1201495520/
‘Modern Family’ recast “Joe” Pritchatt for the third time. After Pierce Wallace played Joe for the last two seasons, Jeremy Maguire will take over in season 7. (deadline)
Renewals and cancellations:
The much acclaimed ‘The Strain‘ has been renewed by FX for a third season. If you are not watching ‘The Strain‘ you are doing TV wrong! (via TVbytheNumbers) http://tvbythenumbers.zap2it.com/2015/08/07/the-strain-renewed-for-season-3-by-fx/444792/
‘Bitten‘ has been picked up for season 3 by SyFy. According to TVLine the new season will air in 2016 (http://tvline.com/2015/06/29/bitten-renewed-season-3-syfy/)
Netfix renews The Wachowskis’ Sense 8‘. It has received great critical acceptance (but since I don’t have Netflix, I don’t have a comment on the show.) Deadline link http://deadline.com/2015/08/netflix-renews-sense8-wachowskis-1201495857/
‘Prison Break‘ is coming back to FOX, because we all asked for it. Much like ‘24‘ ‘Prison Break‘ will be a limited series that forgets all of the cannon it was built on, but has most of its original cast back. http://tvline.com/2015/06/02/prison-break-revival-limited-series-fox-wentworth-miller/
Louis C.K. is taking another extended hiatus from TV. According to AV Club, the length of his break is unknown, but FOX CEO John Landgraf says he is welcome back anytime. http://www.avclub.com/article/louis-ck-taking-another-break-louie-223541
‘Knock Knock Live‘ The show starring Ryan Seacrest, was axed after two episodes because nobody watches TV or answers their door anymore.
http://www.ew.com/article/2015/07/30/knock-knock-live-canceled
FXX has picked up the animated series ‘Cassius and Clay’ A little pessimistic about this one. As much as I love animated series, a little skeptical here but FXX has a way with animated series! ‘I will hold my breath! http://deadline.com/2015/08/cassius-and-clay-animated-series-archer-fxx-1201495051/
Premiere dates of excitement:
FX announced the return dates of ‘AHS: Hotel‘ and ‘Fargo‘ plus the premiere date of Kurt Sutters (‘SOA’) ‘Bastard Executioner‘. AHS returns October 7th; Fargo returns October 12th and ‘Bastard Executioner‘ premiers September 15. (Deadline)
SyFy finally sets a return date for ‘Haven‘. After the cliff hanger that ‘Haven‘ season 5a left us with, the final part of the series will begin October 8th. I am more than a ‘Haven‘ fan, but a junkie, so happy for 5b, but horribly saddened for it to end.
‘Continuum‘ will return on SyFy September 11th for its shortened six episode final season.
TV trailers of interest:
Continuum season 4
http://www.syfy.com/continuum/videos/continuum-returns
‘Haven‘ season 5b
My memory may be a little fuzzy on these since they are all murder mystery movies. Also, some other stuff like getting Adventures of Tom Sawyer and Fester’s Quest for the NES working interjected themselves between viewings. Don’t judge me! I had them as a kid and they need to be beaten. Luckily, because of the kind of movies these are, I don’t think it will be a problem.
Mystery Woman: Oh Baby (2006) – I hadn’t seen Kellie Martin since she was on floor dead in her final episode of ER. I really enjoyed her on that show. This movie pairs her with Clarence Williams III who people probably remember best from The Mob Squad, but I remember him from The General’s Daughter (1999). Martin runs a book shop she took over from her uncle called Mystery Woman Books. The movie begins with a guy getting murdered on a golf course by the partner they were playing with. A woman then shows up at the bookstore with a baby. She knew Martin’s uncle so Martin opens up her home to her and her baby. Soon the mother disappears to join the husband who is on the run. The husband is a groundskeeper who witnessed the murder, but instead of reporting it, ran away. Thus, the police are after him as a suspect. Martin and Williams gear up to try solve the crime. This is the best murder mystery series I have seen so far on Hallmark. Martin and Williams are likable. They don’t come across as busy bodies. You can follow the mystery. You actually care to follow the mystery. And it isn’t sanitized to the point of looking like the Stepford Wives. This one is worth checking out.
The Gourmet Detective (2015) – This is the film that introduces us to the Brooke Burns’ cop who still identifies herself as a detective even though SFPD officers of her type are called inspectors. It also introduces us to Dylan Neal, know as The Gourmet Detective. The setup for him and getting them together is pretty stupid. I can’t believe Neal kept a straight face while explaining that he is called The Gourmet Detective because if a key ingredient runs out, then someone like him hunts down a replacement. The setup BS is just annoying. The rest of the mystery is done well enough. Apparently, just like the second film, a journalist dies. The only really noteworthy thing is that they bother to stop and give us a real recap of what has been figured out so far. I don’t think any of the other ones I’ve watched have done it, or at least in a useful manner. This is really nice. Especially for someone like myself who has difficulty following along. Okay to see, but the second one is better because it doesn’t have all that setup stuff.
Murder, She Baked: A Chocolate Chip Cookie Mystery (2015) – Think that title is long enough? Why not The Incredibly Sensibly Dressed Baker Who Stopped Making Cookies And Became An Amateur Detective. Maybe that will inspire Hallmark’s next series. This is one of those films that people seem to refer to as a cozy mystery. I guess cozy means sanitized and set in nice areas to the point that the Stepford Wives are soon to arrive and the town is going change it’s name to Pleasantville any day now. The movie is about a baker played by Alison Sweeney. After a friend and a delivery driver get killed, she investigates. A cop played by Cameron Mathison comes into things. He’s really just there to add a romantic interest in much the same way they did in Wedding Planner Mystery. It’s neat that Sweeney actually cries over the loss of her friends. In the others it’s like it’s just an excuse to investigate or they don’t seem to care. I remember a scene in Lies Between Friends where Gabrielle Anwar just stared from a distance at the dead body of her friend like she caught her doing something dirty. I would recommend any of the other three films listed here over this one. It’s so sanitized that things like suspense simply don’t exist.
Mystery Woman: Redemption (2006) – Again, we return to the bookstore with Martin and Williams. This time John Ratzenberger plays a Vietnam vet who shows up in the bookstore and soon after is found murdered. The investigation ultimately leads back to something that he and others went through during the Vietnam war. They found something special that they were planning to return to the government later on, but never did. All the good things about Mystery Woman: Oh Baby are present here. In addition, they don’t have to keep a baby in tow. Plus, the story is more interesting. The two Mystery Woman movies are definitely the ones to go with here. I have one more of these films to go and will write about it once I have seen it.
Killer Mermaid!
That’s a great title, isn’t it? Originally, the title of this 2014 film from Serbia was Nymph. However, by the time it reached Netflix, it had become Killer Mermaid. And really, everything you need to know about this movie is right there in that title. It’s a movie about a mermaid that kills people. If you have a strong desire to see a movie about a mermaid that kills people, Killer Mermaid is for you. If you don’t have that desire, then you’re probably not going to be reading this review.
Killer Mermaid takes place in Montenegro. Two American tourists — Kelly (Kristina Klebe) and Lucy (Natalie Burn) — are visiting their old friend Alex (Slobodan Stefanovic) and his girlfriend Yasmin (Sofija Rajovic). (Just in case we forget that Kelly and Lucy are Americans, Lucy wears American flag shorts.) At first, they do typical Americans-in-Europe things. Kelly attempts to confront some past childhood trauma. Lucy sleeps with Alex and then worries about Yasmin finding out. They meet and flirt with Bobban (Dragan Micanovic), a local who looks a lot like Lost‘s Henry Ian Cusick.
And then they make plans to spend a day on a nearby island and exploring an abandoned old military fortress. They do this despite a local fisherman, Niko (Franco Nero!), telling them that it’s a terrible idea because the fortress was built by evil Nazis and anyone who explores it is destined to die a terrible death.
“Ha!” the tourists say, “We’re too young and American to die in Montenegro! Now, let’s go to the remote island with some guy that we’ve only known for 12 hours…”
Ignoring Niko, they go out to the island and … well, you can probably guess what happens. There’s a mysterious caretaker (Miodrag Krstovic) wandering around the fortress. He’s protecting something very important to him and, if that means he has to kill some tourists, so be it.
What is the caretaker protecting? Well, you can probably guess from the title of the film. There’s a mermaid (Zorana Kostic Obradovic, who has a fantastically evil smirk) living in the waters around the island and she’s a killer. Whenever she sings, Alex, Bobban, and the caretaker all go into a state of zombiefication. As women, Kelly, Lucy, and Yasmin are all immune to the mermaid’s song but it really doesn’t matter because, even with that advantage, no one is anywhere close to being smart enough to survive a horror movie. Just the fact that they ended up on that island in the first place should tell you all you need to know about the intelligence of the characters in Killer Mermaid…
But that’s okay because, with the exception of Niko and maybe Bobban (depending on whether or not you had a crush on Lost‘s Desmond Hume), you really don’t care enough about any of these characters to get upset over their impending doom. This film is all about the killer mermaid. It takes her a while to show up and she doesn’t get any lines but she still dominates the entire film. Say what you will about the script and some of the performances, the filmmakers went to the trouble to give us a believable and viscous mermaid.
Killer Mermaid works far better than it should. Yes, it’s pretty much your standard killer monster movie but the film looks good and the mermaid is an impressive monster. While it may never make sense for everyone to have headed off for that island in the first place, the film still makes good use of the atmospheric location. Add to that, Killer Mermaid delivers exactly what it promises.
And, of course, you’ve got Franco Nero as Niko! Now, I have to admit that I didn’t recognize Franco when he first showed up. He’s made up to look as weather-beaten as possible and Nero downplays his trademark charisma, playing Niko as a haunted and emotionally withdrawn man. To be honest, it’s a far better performance than you would probably ever expect to see in a film called Killer Mermaid but, then again, that’s always been the case with Nero. He’s always good, no matter how bad some of his movies may occasionally be. As I’ve said in the past, any movie can be saved by a random Franco Nero appearance and that’s certainly the case with this one.
(That said, it’s hard to imagine that any film will ever top the exhilarating oddness of Franco Nero’s cameo as Jesus in The Visitor.)
That’s Killer Mermaid for you. It’s exactly what you think it is but, with that in mind, it’s entertaining enough.
And it’s currently available on Netflix!
Hi there! The blogger known as Jedadiah Leland and I have launched a TSL side project. We are taking Oscar history, re-imagining it, and turning it into something much better, one year at a time! I, of course, will be handling the even years while he handles the odd years. (Why? Because Lisa doesn’t do odd numbers, that’s why!) Here’s our report on the First Annual Academy Awards, honoring the best of 1914.
(You read that right…)
Mack Sennett, the 1st President of the Academy Of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences
Ironically, considering its current prominence in American culture, the origins of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences are shrouded in mystery.
Reportedly, in February of 1914, a meeting was held in New York City that led to the founding of the Academy. While all exact records appear to be lost, it is generally agreed that the meeting was attended by Mack Sennett,Thomas H. Ince, William Randolph Hearst, Charles O. Baumann, John R. Freuler, Samuel S. Hutchinson, Jesse Lasky, William Fox, Adolph Zukor,D.W. Griffith, Cecil B. DeMille, William Kennedy Dickson, Mary Pickford,J. Stuart Blackton, Albert E. Smith, Carl Laemmle, and L. Frank Baum. By the end of the meeting, not only had the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences…
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Through the Shattered Lens 