Hobo With a Shotgun Teaser Trailer (AICN Exclusive)


It looks to be grindhouse week. First we get Robert Rodriguez’s feature-length version of his fake grindhouse trailer Machete. A trailer created solely to give the Robert Rodriguez/Quentin Tarantino grindhouse/exploitation homage flick, Grindhouse, even more of that dingy grindhouse feel while it played in the theaters. While other fake trailers were shot and added to the film there was one which only saw a theater inclusion during Grindhouse‘s theatrical run and that would be Jason Eisener’s trailer (which beat out other amateur-made fake grindhouse trailers) titled, Hobo With a Shotgun.

Now with Machete set to come out this week on Sept. 03, 2010, the first teaser trailer for the feature-length film version of Hobo With a Shotgun has been released and exclusively for film site Ain’t It Cool News. Jason Eisener also directs this version, but with Rutger Hauer in the role of the Hobo instead of David Brunt who handled the role in the original trailer.

From the look of the film as seen in the teaser this particular flick definitely sticking to its grindhouse roots. This flick could almost be the homeless, perpetually drunk and angry cousin of another 1980’s exploitation action flick starring perpetually scowling and all-around badass Charles Bronson in Death Wish III.

Now, if Eli Roth can just get onboard this making the fake trailers become real flicks and do a feature-length version of his fake grindhouse trailer, Thanksgiving.

Source: Ain’t It Cool News

Review: Lifeforce (dir. by Tobe Hooper)


“I mean, in a sense we’re all vampires. We drain energy from other life forms. The difference is one of degree. That girl was no girl. She’s totally alien to this planet and our life form… and totally dangerous.” — Dr. Hans Fallada

1985’s Lifeforce, directed by Tobe Hooper, was critically panned and barely registered at the box office. Yet in the decades since its release, something curious has happened: the film has gathered a loyal cult following among fans of science fiction and horror. Hooper’s film fuses so many genre conventions that it resists classification—too strange for pure sci-fi, too grandiose for standard horror. The result is a striking and eccentric reinvention of the vampire myth, a lavish but uncanny blockbuster that feels imported from an alternate cinematic timeline.

The film begins squarely in the realm of science fiction. Conceived during the public fascination with Halley’s Comet ahead of its 1986 return, Lifeforce rode the wave of comet-themed media flooding the decade. Most were cheap cash-ins. Hooper’s film stood out for its ambition and its visual scale.

Coming off Poltergeist, Hooper received an unusually large budget—a far cry from the lean, feral energy of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. The story follows the crew of the shuttle Churchill as they discover a massive alien spacecraft hidden in the comet’s tail. Inside, frozen in suspended animation, are three humanoid figures. The ship’s dignified name feels ironic, even doomed; considering what’s to come, Demeter might have been more fitting. Like the sailors of Stoker’s novel, these astronauts inadvertently ferry an ancient predatory force home—yet this time, the threat arrives from the stars.

The horror unfolds once the crew retrieves its mysterious “specimens.” Members die in gruesome succession until only one survivor, Colonel Tom Carlsen (Steve Railsback), escapes in a pod back to Earth. Railsback’s performance is an intriguing mix of unhinged emotion and grim conviction. His intensity suits a film that constantly walks the line between pulp spectacle and cosmic tragedy.

When the story shifts to London, Lifeforce transforms into a supernatural thriller with procedural undertones. Peter Firth’s Colonel Colin Caine becomes the viewer’s compass: calm, authoritative, and determined to impose order on mounting chaos. As London succumbs to panic and outbreak, his steady professionalism anchors the outlandish events. His partnership with Railsback’s haunted, psychic Carlsen gives the middle act its volatile energy.

Among the supporting cast, Frank Finlay leaves one of the strongest impressions as Dr. Hans Fallada, a scientist fascinated by death and metaphysical energy. He serves as both philosopher and investigator, treating the vampiric invasion as a riddle of life itself. His restrained curiosity lends weight to scenes that might otherwise descend into absurdity. While the city collapses, Fallada studies the phenomenon with eerie calm, treating catastrophe as an experiment in cosmic entropy.

Patrick Stewart also makes a memorable, if brief, appearance as Dr. Armstrong, the head of a psychiatric hospital linked to the Space Girl’s psychic presence. His role builds to the film’s most grotesque and bizarre sequence: an exchange of minds, sudden possession, and an unnervingly intimate kiss with Railsback. The moment condenses everything Lifeforce represents—erotic, macabre, and unconcerned with boundaries. Stewart brings a gravitas that makes the absurd strangely compelling, a counterweight to Railsback’s volatility and Mathilda May’s silent allure.

May, as the unnamed Space Girl, says little but dominates the film through presence alone. She embodies an alien ideal of beauty and destruction, gliding through scenes with a composure that’s both sensual and predatory. Her nudity, much debated at the time, plays less as exploitation and more as elemental symbolism—the human body as an expression of both creation and death, desire and annihilation.

Supporting figures from the British military and government round out the ensemble, emphasizing the film’s descent into bureaucratic chaos. Michael Gothard’s Kane, a Ministry of Defence officer struggling to reconcile logic with the inexplicable, captures the helplessness of institutional order collapsing under cosmic threat. His pragmatic exchanges with Firth highlight competing instincts between reason and survival.

As the infection spreads, Lifeforce expands into a vision of urban apocalypse that fuses British science fiction and American spectacle. London becomes a nightmare tableau—crowds of shriveled corpses feed on energy while arcs of blue plasma swirl through the sky. The city’s fall evokes both George A. Romero’s zombie apocalypse and the metaphysical unease of Nigel Kneale’s Quatermass stories. Amid the insanity, Finlay and Firth remain the emotional touchstones, keeping the audience oriented as narrative logic begins to dissolve.

For all its ambition, however, Lifeforce suffers from erratic pacing and tonal whiplash. The first act unfolds with deliberate, moody wonder, then abruptly veers into frenzied exposition and psychic melodrama once the story reaches Earth. The balance between unsettling mystery and outright spectacle often collapses under its own weight. Scenes that should evoke cosmic terror sometimes tip into unintended camp, particularly in the dialogue-heavy middle stretch. Hooper’s direction, though visually imaginative, occasionally struggles to maintain coherence amid the script’s shifting identities—part creature feature, part disaster epic, part metaphysical drama. The editing, especially in the theatrical cut, undercuts tension with rushed transitions that leave emotional beats hanging. Railsback’s manic performance, while strangely compelling, can also verge on excess, blurring the line between conviction and chaos.

Tonally, the film wavers between awe and amusement. For some viewers, its earnest delivery will read as self-parody; for others, its collision of erotic horror and science fiction grandeur gives it a singular vitality. Lifeforce’s flaws are inseparable from its daring. It dares to fail boldly, and in that failure finds a kind of messy transcendence—larger than reason, too strange to fade.

In the end, Lifeforce lingers as one of the strangest hybrids of its era: part gothic fable, part erotic horror, part apocalyptic science fiction. It was too eccentric to find mainstream success, yet its sincerity and scope give it lasting resonance. The ensemble performances and tonal daring hold the film together, transforming potential chaos into something mythic—a story about possession, contagion, and humanity’s fatal pull toward the unknown.

Beneath its spectacle, the film engages in a deeper dialogue between gothic and cosmic horror traditions. Its characters represent a spectrum of responses to the incomprehensible: Fallada’s intellectual curiosity, Firth’s stoic resolve, Railsback’s frenzy, and May’s serene seduction. Together they form a portrait of human fragility in confrontation with the infinite. Where gothic horror finds fear in the collapse of reason, cosmic horror finds it in the vast indifference of the universe.

By fusing these lineages, Lifeforce becomes a mythic apocalypse that feels both intimate and vast—an encounter between flesh and void, terror and temptation. Its fusion of genres, ideas, and performances ensures its peculiar power endures, a reminder that some of the strangest failures of 1980s cinema are also its most visionary.

The Worst Freakin’ Commercial Of All Time


So, about a month and a half ago, Arleigh and I had a little disagreement on which commercial deserved the title of Best Freakin’ Commercial Of All Time.  I argued for the cute little Kia commercials featuring the Sockmonkey and the Freaky Red Thing in Vegas.  Arleigh, however, claimed that the title actually belonged to a series of ads featuring a scary football player destroying stuff and selling deodorant.  Okay, that’s fine.  Friends can disagree.  In the end all that matters is that I love Sockmonkey and Sockmonkey loves me and we don’t care what you think.  So there.

However, all throughout that debate, neither one of us mentioned any possible contenders for the worst commercial of all time.  To be honest, there’s probably too many contenders to really pick just one.  However, I definitely have a least favorite and here it is…

Okay, maybe this isn’t the worst commercial of all time.  In fact, in many ways, it’s oddly effective.  However, if it’s not the worst, it’s certainly the most insulting. 

What are my specific objections to this commercial?   Thank you for asking.

1) I don’t care how effective the freaking 3-D was, the story still sucked!  Oh, wait a minute.  That’s my specific objection to Avatar.  Sorry, it’s been a long week.

Okay, let’s try this again.

1) First off, do I really need a car company to tell me what it means to be an American?  Ever since they got their asses bailed out in ’09, American car companies have been producing the most pompous, condescending commercials possible.  Whereas once we just saw footage of people driving too fast, car commercials today just feel like propaganda.  Now, car commercials are narrated somber men going, “You know what America needs?  America needs a comeback.”  No, America doesn’t need a comeback.  You guys just need to get your shit together.  This commercial continues the new tradition of condescending car commercials. 

2) “We have always been a nation of builders…”  Actually, we’ve also been a nation of poets, artists, freethinkers, farmers, atheists, politicians, libertines, and just about every other category under the sun.  I kinda thought that was the whole point.  I mean, is this a car commercial or is it an educational video? 

3) If you’re going to brag about how America is responsible for the Colt Revolver then at least have the balls to actually show a Colt Revolver while you’re doing it.  A bunch of horses races at the Kentucky Downs while a bunch of rich people sit in the stands and cheer has absolutely nothing to do with the Colt Revolver.  The Colt Revolver was not named after a horse, it was named after the man who invented it.  For the most part, horses were imported to America from Asia by way of Europe.  So, just because whoever made this commercial was scared to show a gun, they instead show an image that totally negates the commercial’s message.

4) What’s up with the weird little guy in that radiation suit?  I mean, does he not look like a villainous doctor from some horrific science fiction movie from the early 80s?  Do we really want someone like that working with radioactive material?

5) Yes, I understand the background music is taken from Johnny Cash song and who doesn’t love Johnny Cash?  But the music is still annoyingly repetitive, like the sort of thing that they play to dull your brian during a brainwashing session.

6) “As a people, we tend to do well…”  You know what, Mr. Smug Narrator Man?  As a person, I do well when I’m not building anything at all.  Don’t insult me with all that “as a people…” BS.

7) “The Things We Make, Make Us.”  Seriously, this is the type of empty, collectivist statement that would make George Orwell throw a fit.  Animal Farm much?

Quickie Review: Eight Legged Freaks (dir. by Ellory Elkayem)


In 2002 there came a film in the tail end of that year’s summer blockbuster film season which took me by surprise. The film I’m talking about was Eight Legged Freaks. It was from Kiwi-born director Ellory Elkayem and he did a wonderful job of bringing back just a small peek at those fun 1950’s giant monster and insect movies like Them! and a host of others.

The film pretty much follows the same conventions as those old-time monster movies. It has the smart and bookish teenage boy whose love for all things spiders will come in handy as the film moves along. Then there’s the eccentric and creepy loner who collects spiders and learns that the water he has been giving them has now been tainted by toxic chemicals from a drum container that has fallen into a nearby river during transport. This river and the creek it feeds is right next to a down-and-out mining Arizona town, ironically named Prosperity. The film  wouldn’t be complete without the arrival of its prodigal son, Chris McCormick (played with quite a bit of understatement by the usual over-the-top David Arquette) whose father used to own the gold mines which the town relied on for its economy.

With a reluctant hero comes the woman he left behind and pined for years ago, but now much older and with kids of her own from a previous marriage. Kari Wuhrer — of MTV and B-movie fame — plays Samantha Parker. McCormick’s love interest who also happens to be Prosperity’s current town sheriff and single mother to the aforementioned teenage boy with the thing for spiders and nubile teen daughter Ashley (played by pre-superstardom Scarlett Johansson). Then there’s Wade, the town mayor whose failing ostrich farm and unused mega-mall is leading him to sell the town wholesale to some nameless giant corporation.

With the basic plot set and characters introduced all hell breaks loose as toxic-mutated spiders grow to giant proportions and begin to terrorize and devour the townspeople. At first, it’s isolated attacks until their numbers grown in size and they attack the town itself en masse. This may be a B-movie but it sure had great CGI-effects when it came to the giant arachnids and how they behaved on the screen. The many different types of giant spiders ended up having distinct personalities to distinguish themselves from each other. From the tank-like tarantula to the agile jumping spiders and the cunning trapdoor spiders. In fact, these spiders were also given some sort of voice which sounded like chipmunks on helium as they screeched, yipped and screamed their way around the screen.

Eight Legged Freaks was not something great to write mom home about, but it was a fun film to sit through, especially one full of teenagers who seem to scream and shout the loudest. This was a type of film that actually needs a rowdy audience to really entertain. There’s really no need to follow the dialogue since most of it is quite forgettable. The action on the screen from the giant spiders chasing motocross-riding teens and their attack on the townspeople at the mega-mall does well without the need of extraneous dialogue.

Ellory Elkayem did a great job in making Eight Legged Freaks not just a fun movie but also a throwback to the 50’s monster movies that we see now on syndication. This movie showed Elkayem had great potential as a genre filmmaker. It’s a shame he had to follow up Eight Legged Freaks with two very awful and forgettable sequels to the Return of the Living Dead franchise. I’m still hoping that he’ll rebound from that double-debacle and make more fun monster movies. Until that happens we’ll always have his little flick about giant, mutant spiders who sounded like chipmunks on helium.

Undead Series Idea


This idea sprang from the zombie idea feedback.

Premise: Mordred Midas, a ruthless and opportunistic man with a vast empire is stricken with an aggressive cancer and is unable to find a cure in modern medicine. He turns to an occultist (an Aleister Crowley meets Alan Moore type of individual) for his salvation.  The occultist is able to cure him but uses this as means to blackmailing Midas.  Midas being proud and arrogant, arranges for the occultist to suffer a fatal accident.   “Alan Crowley” appears to Midas and curses him for his treachery.   The series will center around his attempt to maintain a normal life and keep his secret his hidden.  His employees helps him hide his illness as well as supply him with “live food”.  There will be power plays by opportunistic friends and family members.  It’s essentially Dynasty/Dallas with the redemptive journey similar to Wikus (from District 9) and the supernatural.

Curse: Midas is the only infected since “Crowley” wanted him alone to suffer.  He retains his intelligence, is effectively immortal (save a traumatic head injury or incineration), and  virtually indistinguishable from the living.  He needs to consume flesh in order to retain his intelligence, stave off decomposition, and trigger regeneration.  If he goes too long without feeding he will revert to a ravenous feral state.

Image is courtesy of Comic Art Community (http://www.comicartcommunity.com/gallery/index.php)