Late Night Retro Television Review: Degrassi Junior High 3.2 “Can’t Live With ‘Em: Part 2”

Posted on April 28, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sunday, I will be reviewing the Canadian series, Degrassi Junior High, which aired on CBC and PBS from 1987 to 1989! The series can be streamed on YouTube!

The tragedy of Wheels continues.

Episode 3.2 “Can’t Live With ‘Em: Part Two”

(Dir by Kit Hood, originally aired on November 28th, 1988)

What a sad episode!

Much as with the previous episode, several storylines play out over the course of this episode. For the most part, this episode is all about setting up the rest of the season. Among the things that happen:

Lucy starts to hang out with Paul (Michael Blake), a student at Borden High and she stops hanging out with her best friend, L.D.

Arthur, who has taken to wearing a white scarf to school, finally admits to Yick that his family is rich and that he has been buying and selling stock in a company called Repco. Yick responds by demanding that Arthur pay for their food when they go to the local diner.

Shane hears Spike talking to Liz about how much she misses having free time. As soon as Spike gets home from school, she has to look after baby Emma while Spike’s mother goes to work. Shane approaches Spike and says that he knows that she doesn’t want to talk to him but he’s still going to give her half of his allowance and get a part-time job to help her pay for a babysitter for Emma.

Nancy and Kathleen are still running for school president and getting aggressive in their campaigning. Kathleen confesses to Melanie that she’s scared she’s going to lose. Melanie points out that, even if she does come in second, Kathleen will still be Vice President. Kathleen replies that she doesn’t want to be the second-in-command. She wants it all.

(Kathleen is rarely portrayed sympathetically on this show but I totally related to how she felt.)

Scooter and Bartholomew Bond debate whether Superman is better than Spider-Man.

Even with all that going on, this episode is dominated by Wheels. Last week, Wheels was informed that his parents had been killed by a drunk driver. This week found him struggling with anger, depression, and survivor’s guilt. He was supposed to be with his parents when they were going to the movies and if had gone with them instead of sneaking out to Joey’s house, Wheels probably would have died with his parents. Wheels is haunted by a nightmare in which he wakes up to find his parents coming home from the movies.

“I thought you were dead!” Wheels says.

“We are,” his mother replies.

Wheels doesn’t know what’s going to happen. Wheels is only 14 so living on his own is not an option. His grandmother and grandfather live miles away so if Wheels goes to live with them, it’ll mean abandoning his entire life in Toronto but that might be better than having to enter the foster system.

When Wheels returns to school, no one knows how to talk to him. Not even Snake is willing to approach him. Only Joey tries to talk to Wheels. The first time, Joey hands Wheels the demo tape that they made for the Zit Remedy. Wheels breaks the tape. The next time that Joey approaches Wheels, Wheels beats him up in the school hallway. Joey — and this is why everyone loves him — doesn’t get angry at Wheels. When Wheels finally approaches him and apologizes, Joey tells Wheels that he can beat him up whenever he needs to.

“I’m scared,” Wheels says.

Joey hugs him as the end credits role.

Awwwwwww!

This episode was Degrassi at its best, offering a lot of heartfelt emotions but no easy solutions. Neil Hope (who had lost his own father right before shooting this episode) gives a heart-breaking performance as Wheels and Pat Mastroianni reminds us that, underneath Joey’s bluster, he’s a good person who truly cares about his friends. Just as with last week, this episode is even more tragic if you know what’s destined to happen to the characters later on in the series. For now, though, I’m just going to be happy that Wheels had a friend like Joey.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Degrassi Junior High 3.1 “Can’t Live With ‘Em: Part One”

Posted on April 21, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, the third season of Degrassi Junior High beings with tragedy!

Episode 3.1 “Can’t Live With ‘Em: Part One”

(Dir by Kit Hood, originally aired on November 28th, 1988)

This is one of the most important episodes in the history of the Degrassi franchise. Along with starting the show’s third season, this is the episode that sees the beginning on the long and tragic decline of Derek “Wheels” Wheeler. If you’re a fan of Degrassi: The Next Generation and you’ve always wondered how Wheels eventually ended up becoming a suicidal ex-con who is treated like a pariah by his former friend Snake, this episode is where it all began.

There’s actually a lot going on in this episode, though it’s the Wheels storyline that dominates. With the start of a new school year, everyone at Degrassi is eager to catch up after the summer break. Among the new developments:

Stephanie is no longer a Degrassi student and is instead going to private school. Her brother Arthur and his best friend Yick Yu both apparently hit a growth spurt over the summer. (Yick, in particular, is suddenly surprisingly tall for his age.) Yick notices that Arthur seems to be dressing better and that he’s also taken to reading the business section of the newspaper. Arthur insists that he’s not secretly rich, which is not something you say unless you actually are secretly rich.

Yick and Arthur also play a prank on new 7th grader, Bartholomew Bond (Trevor Cummings), first locking him in the janitor’s closet and then, after letting him out, directing the poor kid to the wrong homeroom. It’s the same joke that Joey played on Arthur, way back in the first episode. The only difference is that Yick and Arthur feel bad about it afterwards.

Having been held back, Joey is repeating the 8th Grade. “Hey,” he asks Snake, “what do you think about Caitlin?” Snake replies that Caitlin is not Joey’s type. Of course, fans of Degrassi: The Next Generation know that Joey and Caitlin are destined to spend the next 20 years falling in and out and back in love with each other.

Spike is back at school. This episode features the first appearance — albeit in polaroid form — of baby Emma. Shane tries to approach Spike, saying that he wants to meet his daughter. Spike tells him to stay away. (Apparently, Shane’s parents sent him to summer camp to keep him away from Spike and Emma.)

With Stephanie gone, both Kathleen Mead and Nancy Kramer (Arlene Lott) are running for president of the student council.

The 9th Graders are spending half the day at Degrassi Junior High and half at Borden High. Lucy notices a cute high school guy and smiles at him, even though the guy’s friend dismisses her as being a “minor niner.”

Ultimately, though, this episode is dominated by Wheels and his family. Wheels wants to hang out with Joey. His parents tells him that they think Joey is a bad influence. His parents don’t care that Joey, Wheels, and Snake have their own band and are working on a demo tape of their only song.

“Parents,” Snake says, “can’t live with ’em, can’t live without ’em.”

Wheels replies that he would be happy to live without them.

Well, Wheels is going to get his wish. When his parents go to the movies, Wheels sneaks out and goes to Joey’s house. He, Joey, and Snake record their demo tape. Wheels then heads home and is stunned to see a police car sitting outside of his house.

They called the cops? Wheels wonders.

No, they’re dead. The police have accompanied Wheels’s grandmother so that she can tell him that his parents were killed by a drunk driver who ran a red light. The end credits roll over a freeze frame of a stunned Wheels being hugged by his grandmother.

OH MY GOD! I mean, seriously, who would have guessed that Wheels’s parents would die right at the same time that Wheels was saying he was sick of dealing with them? As tragic as all that is, it’s even worse if you know what waits for Wheels in the future.

This episode of Degrassi Junior High did everything that a season premiere should. It reintroduced us to the characters and set up the season’s main storyline, the downfall of Wheels. This was classic Degrassi. Next week, things get even worse for Wheels. Poor Wheels.

Retro Television Review: T and T 3.3 “Halfway to Nowhere”

Posted on April 5, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing T. and T., a Canadian show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on Tubi!

This week, Terri and Turner take down the loathsome head of a halfway house.

Episode 3.3 “Halfway to Nowhere”

(Dir by Don McCutcheon, originally aired January 20th, 1990)

Roman (Louis Ferreira) is an angry young man who is on parole and who has been living at a halfway house that is run by Eddy (Danny Pawlick). When Roman discovers that Eddy has been harassing Roman’s girlfriend, Sissy (Krista Bridges), Roman attacks Eddy. Eddy kicks Roman out of the halfway house and attempts to have him sent back to prison.

Terri just happens to be in the police station when Roman is brought in and, just like Amy used to do before her mysterious disappearance, Terri declares herself to be Roman’s attorney. (One gets the feeling that the show’s producers just crossed out Amy’s name on a bunch of scripts and wrote in “Terri.”) Roman turns out to be a terrible client who refuses to talk to anyone, including the attorney who is trying to keep him out of jail. Terri finally calls up T.S. Turner and asks him for help.

Turner’s reaction is to growl about how late it is.

Seriously, what’s going on with Turner this season? He’s in an even worse mood than usual. Maybe he’s mad because Amy has mysteriously vanished without explanation. After all, Turner owed Amy. Amy was the one who got him out of prison. It made sense that Turner would always be willing to drop everything to help out Amy. Terri is just some random lawyer who has shown up out of nowhere.

Terri, it should be said, is not a very good lawyer. At the parole hearing, she puts Eddy on the stand and asks him a bunch of questions, despite not having a clue as to how Eddy is going to respond. She also dramatically announces that she will be calling Sissy as a witness before she knows whether or not Sissy has agreed to testify. When Turner steps into the courtroom without Sissy and shakes his head because Sissy refuses to testify, Terri is forced to walk back her words. I doubt that parole board appreciated that and they probably took their frustration out on Terri’s client.

In the end, Sissy does agree to wear a wire and Eddy stupidly talks about all the crimes that he’s committed as the head of a halfway house. Eddy ends up getting arrested and Sissy and Roman are reunited briefly. That said, it appears that Roman is still going to go back to jail because Terri is a terrible attorney.

On the plus side, this episode featured one of the most loathsome villains to ever show up on T&T and it was satisfying to watch Terri and Turner take him down. On the other hand, it would have been even more satisfying if Terri wasn’t terrible at her job and if Turner didn’t seem to be annoyed by even having to be in her presence. This episode was a mixed bag but at least it looked like Eddy was going away for a long time.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Degrassi Junior High 1.12 “Parents’ Night”

Posted on December 3, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Though not as dramatic as last week’s episode, this week’s episode is just as important to the future of Degrassi.

Episode 1.12 “Parents’ Night”

(Dir by Kit Hood, originally aired on April 5th, 1987)

When it comes to this week’s episode of Degrassi Junior High, it helps to know a little bit about franchise’s history. On the surface, this is a fairly standard episode, with Wheels, Joey, and Spike all getting a storyline. But if you know what waits for these characters in the future, then you know this is one of the most important shows of the franchise’s history. Much like last week’s It’s Late, this episode sets up the storylines that will play out over the next three decades.

Spike is still adjusting to being pregnant. As she tells the Farrell twins, she doesn’t want to have an abortion but she also know that, at the age of 14, she’s too young to be a mother. Shane, she says, has barely spoken to her since discovering that she’s pregnant. Spike is considering giving up the child for adoption. The Farrell twins suggest that Spike speak to Wheels, who is adopted himself. In a rather sweet scene that is well-played by both Amanda Stepto and Neil Hope, Wheels tells Spike that he’s never been angry over being adopted. He also says that he’s never been curious about his birth parents. Much like Spike and Shane, they were simply too young to raise a child.

Wheels has a lot going on in this episode. He’s the bass player in a band! Joey and Snake are also in the band. Joey wants to call the band Joey and the Joy Buzzers. Snake wants to call them Snake and the Charmers, which is actually pretty clever. Wheels says that he’s fine with whatever because Wheels, at this point in the show, is the most well-balanced kid in school. Sadly, this won’t last.

While leaving rehearsal for the upcoming Parents’ Night Talent Show, Wheels is approached by a man named Mike Nelson (Dave James). Mike introduces himself as Wheels’s father and he gives Wheels his number. With Joey’s encouragement, Wheels calls Mike and even meets with him at a local diner. It’s an awkward meeting but, when Wheels finds out that Mike is also in a band, he starts to feel a connection to his father.

However, Wheels also feels guilty because he hasn’t told his parents that he’s been talking to Dave. This eventually leads to him getting angry with Dave and yelling at Dave for trying to re-enter his life. Dave calls Wheels’s adoptive parents and apologizes. When Wheels’s parents tell him that it’s okay if he wants to talk to Dave, Wheels worries that they don’t really want him. Eventually, after giving it some thought, Wheels realizes that he can have a relationship with both his birth father and the people who raised him.

As for Joey’s storyline, he forges a letter from his parents, in which “they” tell Mr. Raditch that they will not be coming to Parents’ Night. Mr. Raditch sees right through him. Oh, Joey!

As I said, it’s a fairly simple episode but it works due to the wonderful and empathetic performance of Neil Hope. Unfortunately, the tragic details of Neil Hope’s life after Degrassi has often overshadowed just how good he truly was on the show. Indeed, it’s not always easy to watch him, bright and full-of-life in Degrassi Junior High, with the knowledge of what the future holds for both the actor and the character. Hope, whose own life provided the inspiration for a few of Wheels’s storylines, was such a good and natural actor that Wheels is compelling despite having the second worst nickname on the show. (Snake, of course, wins the prize for worst nickname. That said, the character was apparently nearly named Slim, which would have been even worse.)

So, why is this episode so important to the future of Degrassi? The reasons below are all technically spoilers but, if you’re a big enough Degrassi fan that you tracked down this review, I’m probably not telling you anything that you don’t already know.

First off, the band will eventually get a name and it won’t be Joey and the Joy Buzzers or Snake and the Charmers. It would be Zit Remedy and Joey’s attempts to become a star would not only be a major plotline through Degrassi Junior High and Degrassi High but it would also frequently be mentioned in Degrassi: The Next Generation as Joey vicariously lived his rock dreams through his stepson, Craig Manning. Famously, Zit Remedy only wrote and performed one song but that song has had a very long life on the show. Everybody wants something, right?

(As well, Zit Remedy was the first of MANY bands to be formed at Degrassi. Hell Hath No Fury, Downtown Sasquatch, Studz, and Whisperhug would all follow but Zit Remedy was there first.)

Though this episode ends with Wheels at peace with both his birth father and his adopted parents, that peace wouldn’t last. One reason why it’s kind of sad to see Wheels happy in this episode is because Wheels would rarely be happy for the rest of the series. Musical “talent” is not the only thing that Wheels and Dave have in common. Dave is an alcoholic and Wheels is destined to end up in prison after killing a kid while driving drunk. (Following this seemingly innocuous episode, Wheels’s life got dark!)

As for Joey, he’ll never be a rock star but eventually, he will make peace with Mr. Raditch, to the extent that Raditch will even joke with him when Joey comes up to the school after Craig is caught skipping class.

And finally, Spike is not going to give up her baby for adoption. Instead, she’s going to keep her daughter and, in the future, Emma Nelson will be at the center of the Degrassi universe. (And Snake will even be her stepfather!)

Next week, season one comes to a close!

Late Night Retro Television Reviews: Degrassi Junior High 1.7 “Best Laid Plans”

Posted on October 29, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Degrassi goes there!

Episode 1.7 “Best Laid Plan”

(Dir by Kit Hood, originally aired on March 1st, 1987)

This week’s episode of Degrassi Junior High is cringe city. I mean that in a good way. Seriously, Degrassi Junior High may be close to 40 years old but awkwardness about sex, especially when you’re still trying to figure out what it’s all about, is a timeless subject.

Stephanie (Nicole Stoffman) has had a crush on Wheels (Neil Hope) since the series began but their one date ended in disaster when Stephanie had too much to drink beforehand. Still, she finally works up the courage to ask Wheels if he wants to do something on Friday night and Wheels says yes! Yay!

Voula (Niki Kemeny), who is absolutely one of the worst characters in the history of Degrassi, pops up to once again whine about Stephanie not thanking her when she won the school presidency and to accuse Stephanie of being sleazy just because she doesn’t dress like a member of polygamous cult. SHUT UP, VOULA! Your father won’t even let you stay out past 9:00.

Stephanie gets even more excited when her mother (Pat Beaven) tells Stephanie that she has a date on Friday and she’ll be out of the house. Stephanie drops Wheels a note asking him to come to her house at 7:30. Soon, everyone is school is talking about how Stephanie and Wheels are definitely going to do it on their date. When the creepy twins ask Stephanie if she’s really going to have sex with Wheels, Stephanie shrugs in the fashion of someone trying to be more worldly than she actually is.

Meanwhile, Stephanie is still refusing to admit that Arthur (Duncan Waugh) is her brother. This annoys Arthur but at least his best friend Yick Yu (Siluck Saysanasy) has managed to get his hands on a VHS copy of Swamp Sex Robots. Yick wants to watch it but, this being the 80s, the only way to watch it would be to pop it in the living room VCR and his parents are always at home. Wait a minute! Arthur has a VCR and both his mother and his sister have dates!

Wheels, feeling insecure about sex, talks to his father (Timm Zemanek). (Of course, true Degrassi fans know that Wheels is actually adopted and his real father is a drunk living on the other side of Canada but it’ll be a while until we reach that storyline.) His father tells Wheels that it’s important to use protection so Wheels heads down to the local drug store and purchases some condoms. The pharmacist is concerned that someone as young as Wheels needs condoms and she gives him a bunch of sex safe pamphlets. What Wheels doesn’t know is that the pharmacist is also …. STEPHANIE’S MOTHER!

OH MY GOD! Seriously, cringe!

It’s Friday night! After embarrassing Stephanie and Arthur by giving them safe sex pamphlets at the dinner table, Stephanie’s mom is waiting for her date. Stephanie is trying to get ready for Wheels without her mom seeing the slutty outfit that she’s wearing. And Arthur wants everyone to get out of the house before Yick and his gang of pervs show up to watch Swamp Sex Robots. Stephanie’s mom’s date arrives on time. Unfortunately, Wheels shows up early and, when Stephanie’s mom opens the door, both dates are standing on the porch, holding flowers.

“You’re the boy from the pharmacy!” Stephanie’s mom says before yelling at Stephanie to come downstairs.

Stephanie’s hasty attempt to toss on a bathrobe as she comes downstairs doesn’t fool her mother. After seeing how her daughter usually dresses outside of the house, Stephanie’s mom sends her date home and then yanks Wheels into the house so that she can give both Stephanie and Wheels a lecture about being too young for sex. Unfortunately, before she can really get into that lecture, Yick and his friends show up wanting to watch their porn….

Seriously, this was a great episode and it represented everything that made Degrassi special. It was honest but it was funny and it had me cringing as I had flashbacks to my own days of wannabe wild youth. Like last week’s episode, Best Laid Plans (great title) proved to be too controversial for the UK and the BBC declined to air the episode.

Seriously, Degrassi goes there!

Shattered Politics #70: The Brady Bunch In The White House (dir by Neal Israel)

Posted on February 5, 2015 by Lisa Marie Bowman

What happens when architect and suburban dad Mike Brady (Gary Cole) is elected Vice President of the United States? Well, President Randolph (Dave Nichols) ends up having to resign when it turns out that he’s thoroughly corrupt. Mike Brady is sworn in as the new President and then appoints his wife Carol (Shelley Long) as his new Vice President. He and his wife run an ethical and determinedly old-fashioned administration. When Senators argue, Carol suggests that they need a time out. When Mike is handed a report that indicates trouble for the economy, Mike looks at it, signs it, and says, “We can do better.” When a racist Senator is seated next to a black nationalist at a White House reception, the two opponents are both served peanut butter on crackers by the Alice, the Brady Family housekeeper and soon, they are bonding over their shared love of peanut butter.

Of course, not everything’s perfect. For instance, middle daughter Jan (Ashley Drane) is haunted by voices in her head that tell her that she’ll never be better than older sister Marcia (Autumn Reeser). However, fortunately, Jan discovers a talking portrait of Abraham Lincoln who talks some sense to her.

And then, middle son Peter (Blake Foster) accidentally breaks a priceless Ming vase. All of the other Brady kids take responsibility for breaking it. President and Vice President Brady quickly figure out that Peter was responsible and, in order to make him confess, they punish every Brady kid but Peter. And then…

Okay, are you getting the feeling that Brady Bunch In The White House is a stupid movie? Well, it is. This 2002 film was made for television and serves as a sequel to the earlier Brady Bunch Movie and A Very Brady Sequel. It features the same basic idea as the first two films: the rest of the world is cynical and angry while the Bradys are still trapped in the wholesome world of their old television show. Mike is still offering up life lessons. Carol is still smiling and saying, “Your father’s right.” Marcia is self-centered. Jan is obsessive. Cindy has issues with tattling. Greg thinks every girl that he meets is really happening in a far out way. Peter is always feeling guilty. Bobby … well, Bobby doesn’t do much of anything.

The big difference is that the Bradys are in the White House now. They’re still reliving incidents from their TV show but now they’re doing it in the White House. And, some of it is kinda cute. Well, I take that back. Most of it is really stupid but the part about the vase made me smile despite myself.

So there’s that.

But, honestly — no, I really can’t think of any clever way to prove that the Brady Bunch In The White House is actually a subversive satire or anything that’s really worth recommending.

Sorry.

However, I did see A Very Brady Sequel on Cinemax last night. It’s kind of funny and features a lot of pretty Hawaiian scenery. Go watch that. Forget about the Brady Bunch In The White House…