Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 3.8 “Matters of the Heart”

Posted on December 2, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network! It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

James Franco is in this episode!

Episode 3.8 “Matters of the Heart”

(Dir by Terence H. Winkless, originally aired on October 5th, 1997)

Cory goes undercover to bust a man who is selling babies to couples who can’t have children. Cory pretends to be pregnant and meets the couple who want to buy her baby. What Cory discovers is that the couple would be loving parents. She realizes that she can’t bust them. Palermo is not amused, pointing out that everyone involved is breaking the law.

Meanwhile, Cory has been caring for a baby who was originally meant to be sold to the same couple. Chris is upset. What if the baby cries and wakes her up? Well, Chris, I guess you’ll get to whine about it like you are about everything else. At the end of the episode, Cory arranges for the baby to be adopted by the couple who wanted to buy her in the first place. Palermo, having suddenly changed his tune, says, “This is a wonderful thing you’re doing.”

Meanwhile, TC goes undercover too! He’s busting a drug dealer who is selling amphetamines to extreme athletes, one of whom is played by James Franco! Remember, during the early days of this site, when I had that huge crush on him? I know a lot of people would say that I shouldn’t admit to that, considering the scandal that pretty much ended his career but …. eh, why deny it? Who hasn’t had a crush on someone who later turned out to be kind of sleazy? It’s a part of growing up. Back in 2010, it all came down to two things: I was young and I found him to very, very appealing, in much the same way that I always used to fall for dysfunctional poets and long-haired guitar players in high school and college. Anyway, what were we talking about? Oh, right — Pacific Blue. As far as the show goes, TC is successful despite the fact that he comes across as being a cop the entire time.

This episode …. actually, I’m surprised to say that this episode kind of worked. Not the stuff involving TC obviously, all of that sucked. In the role of TC, Jim Davidson was too expressionless and dull to be convincing as someone who could possibly pull of an undercover operation. But Cory’s storyline worked, largely thanks to Paula Trickey’s performance. (Trickey was one of the more talented members of the cast but Pacific Blue rarely seemed to understand that.) I have to admit that I even teared up a little at the end as Cory said goodbye to the baby that she had spent weeks caring for.

Seriously, me tearing up while watching an episode of Pacific Blue! What a strange world. Maybe it’s the holiday spirit!

On that hopeful note, I finish up my final 2025 review of Pacific Blue. Retro Television Reviews will be off for the holidays, so that I can concentrate on Awards Season and Christmas movies. Pacific Blue will return on January 6th, 2026!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 3.6 “Sandman”

Posted on November 18, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, the bicyclists continue to get in everyone’s way.

Episode 3.6 “Sandman”

(Dir by Terrence H. Winkless, originally aired on Sept. 21st, 1997)

A hitman named Robert “Sandman” Enright (John Michael Bolger) has been released from prison. Because Enright was previously arrested by TC, TC decides to start harassing him as soon as he gets out of jail. For a bunch of dorks on bikes, the Pacific Blue folks sure do enjoy abusing their power.

Anyway, Sandman is out for revenge against the three men who framed him. And, since TC is tailing him everywhere, Sandman is able to manipulate TC into basically becoming his bodyguard. The main theme of this episode is that TC is an idiot.

Speaking of idiots, Cory’s boyfriend, FBI Agent Tim Stone (David Lee Smith), confessed that he was thinking of getting back together with his ex. With Chris’s support, Cory fought for her man. Myself, I just struggled with the fact that Stone, TC, Palermo — and their actors, Smith, Jim Davidson, and Rick Rossovich — all basically looked like the same guy at different stages of his life.

Finally, Palermo, TC, and Victor played volleyball! That was at the end of the episode and it went on for a while. The whole scene felt like the show’s way of saying, “Hey, remember when Rick Rossovich was in Top Gun? That was cool.”

As usual, this episode featured a lot of tough talk and intense looks, all of which were negated by the presence of grown-ups on bicycles. Even when TC was spying on the Sandman, he did while sitting on his bicycle. It just looked dumb.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 2.15 “Black Pearl”

Posted on August 12, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, the bicycle mayhem continues.

Episode 2.15 “Black Pearl”

(Dir by Terence H. Winkless, originally aired on January 5th, 1997)

TC arrests a woman named Alana (Angela Shelton) on drug and assault charges, just to discover that she’s an undercover DEA agent. TC fears that Alana is in over her head and he tells Alana’s superior, Enright (John Michael Bolger) that he needs to pull her out of the operation. Enright is like, “Whatever, bicycle boy.”

And, to be honest, I think Enright kind of has a point. Why are the bicycle cops always trying to tell other law enforcement agencies what to do? Every episode, either TC or Palermo and Chris gets a really angry look in their eyes and starts barking out orders at people they barely know. It’s bad enough that they ride bicycles. Do they have to act like a bunch of self-righteous pricks as well?

Speaking of bicycles, Victor has to get recertified to be a bike cop. Uh-oh, sounds like Victor could lose his job! Even worse, Victor’s partner in this episode is Chris so not only is Victor in danger of getting fired but he has to spend an entire week listening to Chris put him down. Seriously, there are few characters in the history of television that I dislike as much as I dislike Chris Kelly. Chris is the type who dismisses everyone’s problems before then launching into her hundredth monologue about how much it sucks going from being an Air Force pilot to a bike cop.

Victor trains with Hans Rhey. In this episode, everyone is like, “Oh my God, Hans Rey!” I had no idea who Hans Rey was. I looked him up after this episode and apparently, he was a superstar on the bicycle circuit. Hans does a lot of clunky bike tricks As was so often the case withe professional athletes who played themselves on shows like this, he wasn’t much of an actor. If anything, this episode reminded me of how stupid most people look riding their bicycles in the middle of the street.

Victor gets recertified. Alana ends up dead. Presumably, TC’s upset but since the actor playing him was only capable of one fascial expression, it can be hard to tell. In the end, the real tragedy remains how dorky everyone looks on the bicycles.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 2.8 “Undercover”

Posted on June 24, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Chris goes undercover.

Episode 2.8 “Undercover”

(Dir by Terrence H. Winkless, originally aired on October 13th, 1996)

A smarmy detective wants Chris to go undercover to help investigate a suspected money launderer, Tim Wakefield (Scott Plank). Palermo argues that Chris doesn’t have enough experience to work undercover but the detective asks Chris, “What do you want to do? You ready to get out of those bicycle shorts and do some real police work?”

I have to admit that line cracked me up. It really made the whole episode. Palermo got offended, as he always does whenever anyone points out that bike cops look silly with their shorts and their crisp white shirts. What was great about the line was that it was true. The detective may have been smarmy but he was right about Chris being invited to do “real police work” and he was right about bike cops not being real policemen. Everyone know it’s true! Seriously, if a bicycle cop ever tries to pull you over, just slam down on the accelerator. What are they going to do? Chase you when you’re going over 30 mph? I think not!

(Seriously, two seasons in and the show is still trying to convince us that bike cops are real cops. Sorry, Palermo, it’s not going to happen!)

That said, this episode’s main plot still ended up falling flat because Chris is not a very interesting character and her whole undercover thing wasn’t particularly credible. When she went undercover, she still came across as being just as stiff, humorless, and unlikable as when she’s riding her bike and threatening people with arrest. Tim Wakefield, of course, fell for her and Chris was supposed to be attracted to him and conflicted about her assignment and I never bought it for a second.

(As for Wakefield, he turned out to be not as bad of a guy as everyone assumed. He was arrested but his lawyer got him off and the episode ended with him sending Chris a postcard from some tropical beach. I think Chris was supposed to be wistful as she looked at the postcard but, since Darlene Vogel was apparently only capable of one facial expression, who knows for sure?)

Meanwhile, Cory dealt with being stalked by a mentally unstable ex-boyfriend, Wasn’t it just last week that Cory’s partner was being stalked by a mentally unstable woman? This show certainly does enjoy repeating itself. While Palermo worried about Chris, TC and Victor chased some roller-blading teens who were shooting random tourists with paintballs. The roller-blading scenes were kind of exciting but, unfortunately, they had to share space with all of the awkward bicycle scenes.

This episode had its moments. The roller-blading was cool. The detective making fun of Palermo was gratifying. Overall, though, the fact that the show centers around bicycles continues to be a flaw that simply cannot be overcome. There’s simply no way to make anyone riding a bicycle look impressive, I don’t care how serious they try to look.

Sorry, Pacific Blue.