Street Fighter (1994, directed by Stephen E. de Souza)


What does the M. stand for in M. Bison?

Originally, it was supposed to stand for Mike but my theory is that it stands for Marvelous because how else can you describe Raul Julia’s performance as the villain of Street Fighter?  Julia was dying of stomach cancer when he played Bison, a condition reflected by his gaunt appearance.  But Julia still obviously threw himself into every scene, delivering every melodramatic line as if it was the most important piece of dialogue that he had ever been trusted with delivering.  As a film, Street Fighter is an overedited mess that features one of Jean-Claude Van Damme’s worst performances.  Raul Julia saves it, though.  He gets some of the worst lines and transforms them into the best lines through sheer determination.  That man could have read the phone book and made it interesting.

Jean-Claude Van Damme is Col. Guile in this early video game adaptation.  This isn’t one of Van Damme’s better performances.  He doesn’t really play the Guile from the game.  Instead, he’s just Van Damme with a blue beret and an American flag on his bicep.  Far better are Damian Chapa as Ken and Bryon Mann as Ryu, even though neither gets to do as much as a fan of the game would want them to.  Ming-Na Wen is a promising Chun Li but, instead of focusing on her fighting skill, the movie gets bogged down in trying to set her up for a sequel that would never come.  Are you a fan of Cammy?  Don’t get excited because all Kylie Minogue does is ask Guile if he’s okay.  I did like Wes Studi as Sagat and Gregg Rainwater and Peter Tuiasosopo as T. Hawk and Honda but it still feels like only Raul Julia gives a performance that can compete with the video game version of his character.

There were four editors credited for Street Fighter and maybe that explains why the fights are a mess and the plot is impossible to follow.  It’s a video game adaptation and I don’t demand much but I would like to know who is winning each fight.  The film’s visual scheme, meant to duplicate the look of the game, showed some promise but the editing gave the movie a frantic feel that made it difficult to really appreciate the production design.

There’s never really been a good Street Fighter film but I still think it could happen with the right cast and crew.  If Mortal Kombat could (eventually) be turned into a decent movie, why not Street Fighter?  I still don’t think anyone will ever top Raul Julia as M. Bison, though.  Raul Julia made you believe in Pax Bisonica!

“And peace will reign and all humanity will bow to me in humble gratitude.” — M. Bison

The Eric Roberts Collection: Hunting Season (dir by Eduardo Castrillo)


Yeah, I got nothing.

Seriously, 2016’s Hunting Season is so mind-numbingly dull and bad that I have no idea what to say about it.  Usually, when I see an indie film that is this bad, I keep it to myself because I generally don’t believe in kicking people when they’re down.  I’m far more comfortable trashing a bad film from a major studio than a mediocre one that was shot by some guy who put the entire budget on his credit card.  But a visit to the imdb revealed several comments from people who worked on the film and were never actually paid for their efforts so screw it.  This is one of the worst films that I have ever seen in my life.

Stock brokers are kidnapping people and hunting them for sport.  Tom Sizemore plays Nick, who I guess is supposed to be the head stockbroker.  If I sound confused, it’s because the soundtrack was so muddy that I often struggled to understand what people were saying.  Sizemore disappears from the film, which is a shame because his unhinged, seemingly improvised performance was one of the only interesting things about the film.  (At one point, Sizemore looked straight at the camera and extended his middle finger.  I’m not sure if that moment was scripted or not.)  Eric Roberts shows up for four scenes, playing the father-in-law of one of the stock brokers.  The character’s daughter apparently has some sort of psychic connection with her husband and she shouted all of her dialogue.  Clifton Powell shows up as a guy in a bar.  Miguel Nunez Jr. plays an FBI agent.

Along with not being able to hear the dialogue, I also struggled to understand just where everyone was in relation to everyone else.  The film was so haphazardly edited that it was impossible to really keep track of time or location or anything else that would have helped make the film interesting.  It’s a talky film but good luck understanding what anyone’s saying.  Most of the scenes have so many visible edits and so many close-ups that I got the feeling that everyone was on set at a different time.  It makes for a disjointed and dull story.  I couldn’t follow a bit of it.

Eric Roberts has appeared in nearly 800 films.  This one might be the worst.

Previous Eric Roberts Films That We Have Reviewed:

  1. Star 80 (1983)
  2. Runaway Train (1985)
  3. Best of the Best (1989)
  4. Blood Red (1989)
  5. The Ambulance (1990)
  6. The Lost Capone (1990)
  7. Best of the Best II (1993)
  8. Love, Cheat, & Steal (1993)
  9. Voyage (1993)
  10. Love Is A Gun (1994)
  11. Sensation (1994)
  12. Dark Angel (1996)
  13. Doctor Who (1996)
  14. Most Wanted (1997)
  15. Mercy Streets (2000)
  16. Raptor (2001)
  17. Rough Air: Danger on Flight 534 (2001)
  18. Strange Frequency (2001)
  19. Wolves of Wall Street (2002)
  20. Border Blues (2004)
  21. Mr. Brightside (2004)
  22. Six: The Mark Unleased (2004)
  23. We Belong Together (2005)
  24. Hey You (2006)
  25. Depth Charge (2008)
  26. Amazing Racer (2009)
  27. In The Blink of an Eye (2009)
  28. Bed & Breakfast (2010)
  29. Enemies Among Us (2010)
  30. The Expendables (2010) 
  31. Sharktopus (2010)
  32. Beyond The Trophy (2012)
  33. The Dead Want Women (2012)
  34. Deadline (2012)
  35. The Mark (2012)
  36. Miss Atomic Bomb (2012)
  37. Assault on Wall Street (2013)
  38. Bonnie And Clyde: Justified (2013)
  39. Lovelace (2013)
  40. The Mark: Redemption (2013)
  41. The Perfect Summer (2013)
  42. Self-Storage (2013)
  43. A Talking Cat!?! (2013)
  44. This Is Our Time (2013)
  45. Inherent Vice (2014)
  46. Road to the Open (2014)
  47. Rumors of War (2014)
  48. Amityville Death House (2015)
  49. Deadly Sanctuary (2015)
  50. A Fatal Obsession (2015)
  51. Las Vegas Story (2015)
  52. Stalked By My Doctor (2015)
  53. Enemy Within (2016)
  54. Joker’s Poltergeist (2016)
  55. Prayer Never Fails (2016)
  56. Stalked By My Doctor: The Return (2016)
  57. The Wrong Roommate (2016)
  58. Dark Image (2017)
  59. Black Wake (2018)
  60. Frank and Ava (2018)
  61. Stalked By My Doctor: Patient’s Revenge (2018)
  62. Clinton Island (2019)
  63. Monster Island (2019)
  64. The Reliant (2019)
  65. The Savant (2019)
  66. Seven Deadly Sins (2019)
  67. Stalked By My Doctor: A Sleepwalker’s Nightmare (2019)
  68. The Wrong Mommy (2019)
  69. Exodus of a Prodigal Son (2020)
  70. Free Lunch Express (2020)
  71. Her Deadly Groom (2020)
  72. Top Gunner (2020)
  73. Deadly Nightshade (2021)
  74. The Elevator (2021)
  75. Just What The Doctor Ordered (2021)
  76. Killer Advice (2021)
  77. Megaboa (2021)
  78. Night Night (2021)
  79. The Poltergeist Diaries (2021)
  80. The Rebels of PT-218 (2021)
  81. A Town Called Parable (2021)
  82. Bleach (2022)
  83. My Dinner With Eric (2022)
  84. 69 Parts (2022)
  85. D.C. Down (2023)
  86. Aftermath (2024)
  87. Bad Substitute (2024)
  88. Devil’s Knight (2024)
  89. The Wrong Life Coach (2024)
  90. When It Rains In L.A. (2025

Quickie Review: Return of the Living Dead (dir. by Dan O’Bannon)


Return of the Living Dead has to go down as one of the funniest and inventive take on the zombie subgenre that began after the release of George A. Romero’s Night of the Living Dead. Due to a dispute between Romero and John Russo (co-producer of the original NOTLD), the sequels to Night of the Living Dead that were produced and directed by Romero dropped the “Living Dead” part in their titles. Russo retained the rights to create sequels using those words while Romero just kept the word “Dead” in the follow-up films to Night. It took Russo awhile, but he finally got to use those naming rights with 1985’s Return of the Living Dead.

Even though there were some acrimony between Romero and Russo, the screenplay for Return of the Living Dead makes several complimentary nods to Night of the Living Dead. The film’s premise was what if Romero’s first film was actually based on a true event and that the government and the military covered it up before people got a wind of it. The film takes that simple premise and creates an action-packed horror-comedy that still stands the test of time.

Unlike Romero’s films, Return of the Living Dead actually gives an explanation as to what causes the dead to return to life with a singular purpose of attacking the living. The cause of all this undead mayhem was due to a bioweapon nerve toxin called 2-4-5 Trioxin which was originally designed by the military to defoliate marijuana crops. To say that the side-effects of the gas had some interesting effects was an understatement. The zombies created by Trioxin do attack the living but they’re also much more livelier and smarter (retaining agility, strength and mental capacity of their previous life) than the traditional Romero-zombies. They also do not feed on just humans. They also feed on other animals. The last major difference between the Romero-zombies and the Trioxin-zombies was that the latter only wanted to feed on live brains to end the pain of being dead. These differences made for a much faster-paced horror movie. As much as I consider the Romero zombie films as the best out there, I hold a special place in my horror-fan heart for these Trioxin dudes.

The story by John Russo would be turned into a screenplay and directed by Dan O’Bannon also made Return of the Living Dead behave more as a horror-comedy than just a straight-up horror. The dialogue between the characters were full of great one-liners that would’ve sounded cheesy if not for the great and game performances from the cast. Clu Gulager as Burt Wilson (owner of the medical supplies warehouse where the lost canister of Trioxin was being stored in) did a great job being incredulous at the events happening around him. His back and forth with his friend Ernie (played with Peter Lorre eyes by Don Calfa), the local mortuary’s gun-toting mortician, keep the film lively and hilarious in-between scenes of horror.

The scene stealers in the film must go to a bumbling pair of Burt’s employees who inadvertently release the toxic and reanimating gas from the warehouse’s inventory of Trioxin canister. James Karen as the worldly and cynical Frank was a riot from start to end. His over-the-top performance had me in stitches. He played Frank with such a manic, panicky style that it was difficult not to get caught up in his hysterics. To balance out Frank’s Hardy with his more subdued, but no less panicked Laurel, was Thom Mathews as Freddy. Mathews would later appear in other horror movies in the decade and even reprise a similar role in this film’s sequel. His performance as the straight man to Karen’s fool was also very good. His slow decline into becoming one of the zombies after the initial inhalation of the Trioxin gas in the film’s introduction was funny and sad. Of all the zombies in the film he gets the brunt of the slapstick sequences, especially once he starts hunting his girlfriend for her brains. His professing of his love for her and at the same time wanting her to give up her brain was hilarious, if not creepy as well.

Another thing that Return of the Living Dead had that made it different from Romero’s zombie movies were the scenes of gratuitious nudity throughout the film. A majority of the nude scenes were courtesy of scream queen Linnea Quigley as the punk rock Trash whose morbid obsession with all things death made her an early victim for the zombies and later on as one of their leaders. I know that kids my age at that time replayed over and over the scene of her strip-tease down to nothing atop a graveyard headstone. Even now many fans of the film consider that sequence as one of their favorite.

Return of the Living Dead still counts as one of the best zombie movies out there and preceded the UK’s Shaun of the Dead by two decades as a great horror-comedy. There was a sequel a few years later to capitalize on the popularity of the first film. It tried to capture the hilarity and horror of the first one but did not measure up in the end.