Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 4.19 “Vigilante”

Posted on October 27, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983. The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!

It is time to leave the Bronx….

Episode 4.19 “Vigilante”

(Dir by Arnold Laven, originally aired on May 3rd, 1981)

A citizen’s patrol has taken to the streets of Los Angeles and, despite their good intentions, they’re getting in the way of the Highway Patrol. They’re supposed to call the cops if they actually see anything but one member of the group is trying to take the law into his own hands. If that wasn’t bad enough, Getraer has someone sending threatening messages to his house. Getraer thinks that he can handle things on his own but apparently, he’s forgotten the name of the show that he’s on.

This episode wasn’t bad. I actually appreciate any episode that gives Robert Pine a chance to do more than just bark out orders as Pine was one of the better actors on the show. Because Getraer was under so much pressure, he ended up snapping at a lot of the officer during the morning briefing and one got the feeling that Pine enjoyed getting to yell. Still, at one point, Getraer punishes Grossman by giving him desk duty and you have to wonder if maybe that’s why Los Angeles now needed vigilantes to keep the streets safe.

The vigilantes themselves reminded me a bit of New York’s Guardian Angels. I checked and the Guardian Angels were themselves formed in 1979 so I guess it’s possible that this episode was inspired by them. I can’t say for sure because I don’t know how prominent the organization actually was in 1981. Today, of course, the Guardian Angels are once again very prominent because their founder, Curtis Sliwa, is running for mayor of New York. Apparently, he’s stuck in third place, which is a shame when you consider who is in first and second place. Personally, I would vote for Sliwa because he owns six cats and I happen to be collector of berets but I’m also not a New Yorker.

As for vigilante justice, I don’t condone it but I certainly see the appeal.

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 2.10 “Return of the Turks”

Posted on September 2, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

After two months, I’m ready to get back on the California highways with Jon and Ponch!

Episode 2.10 “Return of the Turks”

(Dir by Barry Crane, aired on November 25th, 1978)

It’s always bad news whenever Ponch runs into any of his old friends.

In this episode, when he pulls over a van, he’s shocked to discover that it’s being driven by his old friend, Sid (Kaz Garas). After discovering that former wild man Ponch has now become a cop, Sid spirals into a midlife crisis that leads to him and his friend Rudy (Mark Thomas) playing bumper cars on the highway. Sid is freaked out by the entire experience but Rudy discovers that he loves intentionally bumping into other cars and forcing them off the road.

This episode featured a lot of car crashes and, as usual with CHiPs, they were well-filmed. But I have to admit that I found it almost too disturbing to watch. Usually, I enjoy a good car chase or a spectacularly-filmed car crash. I like fast cars and I’ve always been aware that, when a car crashes onscreen, it’s being driven by a stunt driver. But, back in May, was Dad was in a very serious car crash. He not only broke his shoulder but the crash aggravated his Parkinson’s and the subsequent stay in the hospital and in rehab left him so weak that he died two weeks ago. As a result, I’m not really in the mood for car crashes right now. That’s not the fault of this show, of course. And, under normal circumstances, I would probably be raving about how exciting Rudy’s highway mayhem was.

Ponch is not the only one who meets someone from his past. Baker runs into Pete (James Houghton), the brother of his former partner. Pete’s brother died when he crashed his motorcycle on duty. Pete now puts on his brother’s uniform and pretends to be a member of the Highway Patrol, writing tickets and directing traffic, Because he stole and copied a page from Ponch’s ticket book, Ponch gets the credit for all the tickets but — uh oh! — it turns out that a lot of the tickets are being contested in court. Pete is a bit overzealous. Can Baker and Ponch get Pete off the street before he pulls over the wrong person? And why is a story about the brother of Baker’s former partner mostly about Ponch?

This was a rather melancholy episode. It’s easy to laugh at any episode that features people talking about how Ponch used to be a delinquent because Erik Estrada’s goofy performance doesn’t exactly lend itself to that interpretation. But, in the end, Sid, Pete, and even Rudy were all suffering from a general sort of malaise. They all regretted the way that their lives had turned out and they were all using the California highways as a way to live out their dreams. Unfortunately, by doing so, they put other people’s lives at risk. Fortunately, Baker and Ponch were there to keep the highways safe …. though only after two spectacularly-filmed pile-ups.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Highway to Heaven 2.5 “The Devil and Jonathan Smith”

Posted on April 11, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Highway to Heaven, which aired on NBC from 1984 to 1989. The entire show is currently streaming on Freevee and several other services!

This week …. it’s Halloween!

Episode 2.5 “The Devil and Jonathan Smith”

(Dir by Michael Landon, originally aired on October 30th, 1985)

It’s Halloween and Mark Gordon has got himself in some trouble.

Left alone while Jonathan helps a guy learn that gambling is never a good idea, Mark accidentally runs over a kid. The child is taken to the hospital in critical condition. Though Mark is told that the accident was not his fault, he still feels guilty and remarks to one doctor (Anthony Zerbe) that he would even give up his own soul for the child to get better. And wouldn’t you know yet — suddenly, the child gets better!

It turns out that the doctor wasn’t a doctor at all. He was Jabez Stone, a bookstore owner who works for the Devil (played, with two horns on his head, by Michael Berryman). Jabez explains that unless Mark holds up his end of the bargain, the child will die. He gives Mark a contract to sign, stating that he will give his soul to the Devil at the end of Halloween. Without Jonathan around to advise him, Mark signs the contract.

When Jonathan does finally return from his mission, he’s not happy to hear about what Mark has done. Jonathan explains that he can’t just order Jabez to destroy the contract. Instead, he’s going to have to somehow convince Jabez to give him the contract. In short, Jonathan is going to have to pull a con job. Since he’s an angel, Jonathan is not allowed to lie or steal. But there is a con artist named CJ Barabbas (Conrad Janis) who might be willing to help.

Or, CJ might be planning on tricking Jonathan into surrendering his own soul to Devil! As CJ tells Jabez, he would be willing to do anything to make sure he got a cushy office job if he should happen to end up in Hell. Is CJ planning on betraying Jonathan or is it just another part of the con?

Well, you can guess the answer. We’re only in the second season of a five-season show and, if Jonathan lost his soul, that would make the rest of the series kind of awkward. There’s never any doubt that CJ is playing a long con on Jabez and the Devil and it’s actually pretty easy to guess just how exactly he’s going to pull it off. This isn’t The Sting. It’s Highway to Heaven.

That said, this was a fun episode. Michael Berryman and Anthony Zerbe both seemed to be having a ball playing such cartoonishly evil characters and Conrad Janis was actually rather charming in the role of CJ Barabbas. Season 2 has gotten off to an uneven start but this episode was both humorous and, in its way, kind of touching. Landon and French were close friends in real life and that friendship comes through as Jonathan tries to keep Mark from spending an eternity in Hell.

Next week, Jonathan teaches a bunch of factory workers a lesson about pollution!

Retro Television Reviews: Fantasy Island 3.20 “Nona/One Million B.C.”

Posted on October 24, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1986. Almost entire show is currently streaming is on Youtube!

This episode features a trip to the past and a surprisingly good turn from Peter Graves.

Episode 3.20 “Nona/One Million B.C.”

(Dir by Earl Bellamy, originally aired on March 1st, 1980)

This week, we have another episode of Fantasy Island in which a somewhat effective fantasy is matched with an incredibly dumb one.

The dumb fantasy involves two women (Phyllis Davis and Jo Ann Pflug) who want to go back to a time when men took care of everything and women didn’t have to do anything. They’re sick of all that women’s lib stuff! Mr. Roarke explains that their fantasy is rather vaguely worded and then sends them back to the time of dinosaurs and cavemen. (Of course, dinosaurs and cavemen didn’t exist at the same time but whatever.) After the two women are nearly killed by a Claymation dinosaur, they are taken in by a tribe of cavemen. Since their modern clothes were ruined in all the excitement, they are given fashionable fur outfits to wear. Despite the fact that they’ve gone back to One Million B.C., the new animal skins outfits have built-in bras, showing that the cave people were more advanced than anyone realized.

Anyway, living in a cave sucks but, fortunately, it turns out that tribe’s leader (Neville Brand) is actually just Mr. Roarke in disguise. Just as the cavemen find themselves in a battle with another tribe of cave dwellers, Roarke reveals himself and ends the fantasy. Yes, it was dumb.

The other fantasy was significantly better. Ned J. Scott (Peter Graves) is a former Chicago cop who is now blind but still obsessed with finding the whereabouts a missing actress named Nona (Joanna Pettet). Roarke gives Scott one of his magic potions, which briefly returns his ability to see. Fortunately, Nona is on Fantasy Island, being held prisoner by a knife-wielding pimp (Edd Byrnes). Scott saves her from the pimp, encourages her not to be so critical of herself, and reunites Nona with her family before losing his eyesight once again. Nona, having fallen in love with Scott, declares that she loves him whether he can see or not. They leave the Island together. Awwwwww!

The second fantasy had its flaws, not the least of which was that Nona certainly got over being a sex slave in record time. But, almost despite itself it still worked. A lot of that is due to Peter Graves. Graves, who we normally think of as being something of a stiff actor, gives a very emotional performance here and the viewer never doubts for a second his love for Nona. Graves especially does a good job in the scenes where Scott realizes that his vision is starting to fade and that he will soon be blind again. He gives a fully committed performance, one that elevates the fantasy.

Finally, this episode features one brief scene of Roarke and Tattoo banter. (Roarke and Tattoo banter used to be one of the show’s trademarks but it was rarely seen during the third season.) Roarke tricks Tattoo into thinking that he’s just taken an invisibility serum. It’s a bit cruel but at least they were speaking to each other again.

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 1.2 “A Tasteful Affair / Oh, Dale! / The Main Event”

Posted on September 14, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986! The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

It’s time to set sail on adventure and set your mind on a new romance!

Episode 1.2 “A Tasteful Affair / Oh, Dale! / The Main Event”

(Directed by Richard Kinon, Adam Rafkin, and Stuart Margolin, originally aired on October 1st, 1977)

The second episode of The Love Boat was all about fighting lovers.

For instance, one storyline — I assume it’s the one that was called “The Main Event” — features Sherman Hemsley as Maurice Marshall and LaWanda Page as his wife, Stella. From the minute that they get on the boat, Maurice and Stella are arguing but it soon becomes obvious that, like many couples who have been together for a while, arguing is just the way that they express their love for each other. The insults may be frequent but they’re always affectionate, which is kind of sweet. Anyway, while on their way to dinner in the ship’s lounge, they get stuck in an elevator. After arguing about the best way to escape from the elevator, they end up making out. Of course, when the doors to the elevator do finally open, Captain Stubing and Gopher see that the couple, rather than being dead, are instead making good use of the space. Everyone laughs. Seriously, that’s the entire story. Two people get suck in an elevator and make out. That’s it. You know, you can fool around on a moving elevator as well. You don’t have to fry the circuitry ahead of time. Just listen for the ping before the elevator doors open.

In a rather more serious storyline, Jaclyn Smith plays Janette Bradford, the wife of a wealthy but heartless man named Lucas (David Knapp). Lucas is convinced that Janette is only taking the cruise alone because she’s planning on cheating on him. Lucas hires a private investigator named Dennis Kingsley (Dennis Cole) to watch her on the boat. Dennis soon discovers that Janette is not cheating on her husband but instead, she took the cruise because she needed a break from his controlling and emotionally abusive ways. Dennis ends up falling in love with Janette and Janette with him. However, Dennis also knows that he’s going to have to tell her the truth about why he’s on the cruise. It doesn’t quite lead to heartbreak but it’s still far more serious than anything you might expect to see on a show of The Love Boat‘s reputation. Jaclyn Smith, it should be said, does a wonderful job in the role of Janette, capturing both the vulnerability of someone in an abusive relationship and also her growing determination to escape from Lucas’s control.

Unfortunately, while all of this is going on, you have to deal with John Ritter playing a guy whose lover actually is cheating on him. Ritter plays Dale. Dale wants to follow his girlfriend on the cruise for the same reason that Lucas hired Dennis to spy on Janette. Dale suspects that he’s being cheated on. However, the cruise is almost entirely sold out. There’s only one ticket left but it’s to share a cabin that’s already occupied by a woman. Since Dale is not a woman, he can’t buy the ticket. So, of course, Dale steals a blonde wig and a suitcase full of the frumpiest dresses imaginable. Can you guess where this is going? Dale gets his cabin, falls in love with his cabinmate (played, in a likable performance, by Tovah Feldshuh), and spends a lot of time changing clothes in the ship’s linen closet. Captain Stubing ends up getting a crush on the mysterious woman with the big blonde hair and the ugly dresses and yes, it’s as stupid as it sounds with a heavy dose of cringey 70s gay panic humor tossed in to boot. It doesn’t help that John Ritter gives such a frantic performance in the role that I actually got nervous watching him. “Calm down!” I wanted to say.

As you can guess, the tone is all over the place in this episode. That’s to be expected when you’re telling three stories at one time but there’s such an imbalance between Jaclyn Smith acting depressed and fragile and John Ritter doing pratfalls that it ultimately takes away from both stories. With the second episode of The Love Boat, it seems obvious that the show was still struggling to find the right balance between drama and comedy. As well, this episode suffers because the crew isn’t given much to do. The first episode was enjoyable because the main cast had a fun chemistry but, in this episode, everyone is a bystander except for Captain Stubing. Unfortunately, this episode couldn’t even treat Stubing consistently as the elevator storyline requires Stubing to be significantly smarter than the Stubing who appears in the John Ritter storyline.

Would the show ever succeed in finding and striking the right balance? We’ll see what happens next week!