Karen Woolridge | Through the Shattered Lens

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Friday the 13th: The Series, a show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The entire series can be found on YouTube!

This week, it’s personal for Jack!

Episode 2.23 “The Maestro”

(Dir by Timothy Bond, originally aired on May 22nd, 1989)

Famed choreographer Anton Pascola (Colm Feore) is fond of saying that great art requires pain and he would know. A former dancer, Anton was injured in an accident and now walks with a pronounced limp. He has devoted his life to choreography and he has a small company of dancers who are devoted to him, despite his fearsome temper. Because Anton’s dancers tend to be accident prone and also suicide-prone, there are frequent openings in his company.

Pascola’s newest dancer is Grace Cowell (Cynthia Preston). Grace is young and naive and she thinks her dreams are about to come true. She is also the daughter of one of Jack’s best friends. When she takes Jack, Ryan, and Micki to a Pascola-choreographed performance of Romeo and Juliet, they are shocked to hear that the lead actors recently leapt out of a window together. When Jack discovers that one of the cursed antiques is a Victorian music box that plays an amazing symphony but also forces the listeners to dance until they die, he realizes that Grace is in danger.

For all the time that they spend searching for cursed antiques, it’s amazing how often Jack, Ryan, and Micki just happen to stumble across one being used by someone they know. I understand, of course, that it’s meant to add an extra personal element to their adventures. Trying to save the daughter of his (never-seen) best friend adds something to the story that wouldn’t be there if Jack was trying to save someone he wasn’t personally close to. But, at times, the way that this show depends on coincidence can get to be a bit much.

That said, Jack’s personal connection to this week’s antique does lead to one of the show’s most devastating endings. Proving that he practices what he preaches, Anton dances to the music box’s symphony while an audience watches. He dances until he dies. Unfortunately, Grace is dancing with him and she dies as well. This is not the first time that someone close to the main characters has died on this show. What makes this episode unique is Jack’s reaction. Jack has always been the wise father figure who helps to keep Micki and Ryan strong. But when Grace dies, Jack has a breakdown. He goes from obsessively trying to clean Grace’s blood off the music box to throwing antiques across the shop. For once, it’s Micki and Ryan who have to calm down the distraught Jack.

The episode has more than a few plot holes and Grace’s actions often don’t make sense. Even after she discovers that Pascola is killing his dancers, she still wants to work with him. The implication is that she’s been brainwashed by his claims that art requires pain but there’s a difference between pushing yourself and killing yourself. If Grace had previously acted like someone who had a death wish, the episode would not only make more sense but it would actually be a good deal more interesting. That said, as someone who grew up going to dance classes and rehearsing and performing, I’ve certainly known my share of Anton Pascolas. This was an episode to which I could relate.

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing T. and T., a Canadian show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on Tubi!

This week, T.S. and Amy continue to keep Canada safe.

Episode 1.19 “Special Delivery”

(Dir by Vic Sarin, originally aired on May 15th, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us during the pre-credits preview, “a young boy’s on the run with only his fears and a mysterious package for company.”

Bruce Johnson (Robert McClure) is an old friend of T.S. Turner’s who is now working as an executive for the Canadian space program. He records a tape in which he tells T.S. that he suspects that someone is trying to sabotage Canada’s latest space rocket and that his life in danger. “If anything happens to me,” Bruce asks, “take care of David and Brenda.” Bruce leaves his office with a package of evidence. He finds his 12 year-old son, David (Jamie Dick) skateboarding in front of a school. He gives the package to David and tells him to deliver it to Decker’s gym. David wears his baseball cap backwards so we all know he’s a rebel. Bruce is nabbed by the police as soon as he gives David the package but, fortunately, David is able to roll away on his skateboard.

With her husband and son both missing, Brenda Johnson (Karen Woolridge) calls T.S. Turner at Amy’s law office. Turner is out but the spacey administrative assistant, Sophie (Catherine Disher), takes the message and then runs down to the courthouse to give it to Amy. As someone who has worked as an administrative assistant, Sophie’s unprofessionalism made me cringe. How can Amy run her law office if the office is so disorganized? I’m surprised T.S. puts up with it.

Amy heads down to the police station, where she discovers that Brenda is being held as a witness in a federal investigation that’s being headed up by Detective Williams (William Finlay), who is a part of the Canadian Bureau of Investigation. Williams asks Amy where Bruce and David are and Amy tells him that Brenda has “civil rights.”

“Civil rights are superseded in matters of treason,” William replies.

Amy threatens to call a press conference so Williams agrees to let Brenda go free. Wow, that was easy!

10 minutes into this episode, T.S. finally shows up. He and Amy get a hot dog on a city street. “Thanks, brother,” T.S. tells the hot dog vendor. Amy fills T.S. in on what’s happening. T.S. suggests that Amy head to the gym while T.S. searches the city. Meanwhile, mysterious men in gray suits watch their every move.

Meanwhile, David continue to ride his skateboard through the city. He gets chased by the cops at one point and has to run through an office building to escape. Seriously, how big is this city? The kid just had to go to the gym!

Finally, 15 minutes into this 23-minute episode, David reaches the gym. However, he can’t go into the gym because the feds are staking it out! So, he just stands around outside with his hands in his pockets. T.S. shows up at the gym and announces, “The Kid’s not going to show up here with federal agents outside!”

After putting on camouflage gear, T.S. grabs Decker and heads back to the office. (Amy stays at the gym.) While Sophie flirts with Decker, T.S. calls the gym and tells Amy that David is at the office. T.S. knows the lines are bugged so this is his clever plan to throw off the feds. And it works! As Amy and Agent Williams head to the law office, Decker and T.S. head back to the gym.

And yes! David is now in the gym. He gives T.S. the package.

“Hey, little brother,” T.S. says, “everything’s going to be alright.”

Suddenly, a random bad guy shows up in the gym, holding a gun. He demands the package and promises no one will get hurt.

“Someone sticks a gun in my face, that don’t exactly inspire confidence!” T.S. explains.

T.S. then punches the guy out. One scene later, a news reporter informs us that Bruce Johnson has been found alive so I guess that’s the end of that.

This was a weird episode. For all the talk of international intrigue and Canada’s space program, the majority of it was just filler footage of the kid rolling around on his skateboard. T.S. was barely in it, leading me to suspect that maybe Mr. T had some vacation time and wanted to leave early. Either way, at least Canada’s space program was saved.

Episode 1.20 “Pros and Cons”

(Dir by Don McCutcheon, originally aired on May 23rd, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T says, “some high-rolling crooks make a very big mistake when they pick on my Aunt Martha.”

Two con artists — Harry (Booth Savage) and Louise (Janet-Laine Green) — pretend to be members of law enforcement and trick T.S.’s Aunt Martha into withdrawing a good deal of money from the bank. Martha thinks that she’s helping them catch a criminal but actually, she’s just given up her hard-earned money. T.S. isn’t going to stand for that! However, Martha doesn’t want to tell T.S., even though T.S.’s nice, Renee (Rachael Crawford) thinks that she should.

So, Renee decides to investigate on her own. After rather easily stealing a book of mugshots from the police station, Renee shows it to Aunt Martha, who immediately identifies Harry and Louise. By running a fake credit check on Louise, Renee and Aunt Martha are able to track them down to a ritzy hotel. Renee dresses up like a maid and Aunt Martha dresses up like a rich guest and they infiltrate the hotel.

Meanwhile, T.S. is shocked to discover that a check that he wrote to fix his car has bounced.

“Why would it do that!?” T.S. demands.

T.S. and Amy go to Aunt Martha’s and find all of Renee and Martha’s notes. Realizing that the two of them are confronting the con artists at the hotel, T.S. and Amy arrive just in time to see Harry and Louise trying to run from the hotel. T.S. blocks Harry’s escape. Harry grabs a mop and points it at T.S.

“Ain’t no way, brother,” T.S. replies.

T.S. subdues Harry by tossing him over a railing (don’t worry, Harry lands on a table) and Aunt Jackie punches out Louise.

The problem here is pretty obvious. The name of the show is T and T, not Renee and Jackie. The fun thing about this show is listening to T.S. growl at the criminals. This episode pushed both Amy and T.S. to the side and, as such, it just wasn’t that much fun. Sorry, Aunt Jackie!