Late Night Retro Television Review: Friday the 13th: The Series 2.11 “The Sweetest Sting”

Posted on September 27, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Friday the 13th: The Series, a show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on YouTube!

Agck! Bees!

Episode 2.11 “The Sweetest Sting”

(Dir by David Winning, originally aired on January 16th, 1989)

I have never been stung by a bee or a wasp.

I’m extremely lucky. All of my sisters and all of my cousins have been stung once or twice. My mom was stung multiple times when I was little. But I have never once been stung. I once had a wasp fly straight into my hair and I was able to shake it out without it stinging me. I have had bees land on my bare arm and just sit there without stinging. I once knocked a wasp nest off of a farm doorway and the wasps, while obviously angry, made no attempt to sting me in retaliation. For whatever reasons, the wasps and the bees have decided not to mar my beautiful skin with any of their stingers and I appreciate them for that.

Of course, I’m also very scared that they might someday change their mind. I have no idea what it feels like to be stung but I know it’s painful. On a more serious note, I have no idea whether or not I’m allergic to bees or wasps. I appreciate their kindness but I’m still terrified of their capriciousness.

That’s why this somewhat silly episode of Friday the 13th freaked me out. I say silly because it was about McCabe (Art Hindle), a psycho beekeeper who kept all of his bees in a cursed hive. Whenever he would unleash the bees, the cheap special effects were so bad that it would have made me laugh if not for the fact that I’m already scared enough of innocent bees. Imagine how I feel about cursed ones!

The bees produced cursed honey that can be used to restore the youth of people who allow themselves to be stung by McCabe’s bees. (Because they’re magic bees, they don’t die after stinging someone. I always understood that stinging someone caused a bee to be ripped in half so I’m not sure how the magic works but whatever. I actually kind of feel bad for bees now.) However, the people who accept McCabe’s youth treatment have to have a constant supply of honey and McCabe needs a constant supply of dead bodies so that his clients can fake their own deaths. So, McCabe orders his clients to kill if they want to remain young.

To be honest, the whole plot kind of feels like it was made up on the spot but the great Canadian character actor Art Hindle gives an amusingly over-the-top performance as McCabe. McCabe is the type of villain who laughs whenever he’s thinking about doing something evil. There’s nothing subtle about Hindle’s performance but it works in the contest of the episode’s overall absurdity. The bees are obviously fake. Art Hindle chews up every piece of scenery he can get his hands on. The episode’s a lot of fun.

Late Night Retro Television Reviews: Friday the 13th: The Series 1.7 “Doctor Jack”

Posted on November 17, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Friday the 13th, a show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on YouTube!

This week’s episode of Friday the 13th: The Series is actually really good!

Episode 1.7 “Doctor Jack”

(Dir by Richard Friedman, originally aired on November 9th, 1987)

Dr. Vincent Howlett (Cliff Gorman) has a reputation for being a miracle worker. He’s the surgeon who is called in to do the difficult operations that no other surgeon would have the courage to try. Somehow, despite all of the complex surgeries that he has been involved in, he has never lost a patient. The local Toronto hospital is very happy to have Dr. Howlett on staff.

However, Dr. Howlett’s success rate is not just a case of medical skill. He owns a special, lucky scalpel. He purchased it from a knife dealer who earlier purchased it from — you guessed it! — the cursed antique shop. The scalpel is from the Victorian era and it once belonged to none other than Jack the Ripper! The scalpel can make any surgery a success but it demands blood as payment. So, before every surgery, Dr. Howlett has to go out and find someone to murder.

Searching the scalpel as a part of their mission to track down all of the cursed antiques, it doesn’t take long for Ryan, Micki, and Jack to track the scalpel down to Dr. Howlett. However, when Ryan tries to steal the scalpel, a chase through the hospital ensues. When Jack distracts Howlett long enough for Ryan and Micki get away, Jack ends up getting thrown down an elevator shaft.

Jack survives his fall but he’s suffered some terrible internal injuries. In fact, he’s going to need surgery! Fortunately, the best surgeon in Canada is on staff at the hospital. As much as Ryan and Micki want to steal that scalpel, they know that Howlett is going to need it if he’s going to save Jack’s life.

Meanwhile, Jean Flappen (Eva Mai Hoover) is stalking the hallways of the hospital, carrying a gun and hoping to get revenge on Dr. Howlett for the murder of her daughter….

Yikes! Hospital’s are creepy in general but they’re even more creepy when the head surgeon is carrying around a scalpel that once belonged to Jack the Ripper. (Of course, in reality, it’s doubtful that Jack the Ripper was actually a doctor. In all probability, he was a butcher in all definitions of the word.) This episode makes great use of the hospital setting, creating an atmosphere of perpetual unease. It was a genuinely scary location and, for once, the fact that Friday the 13th didn’t have a huge budget worked to show’s advantage. The shots of the empty and shadowy hospital hallways, without even an extra or two populating them, were truly ominous.

Cliff Gorman also gave a wonderful performance as Dr. Howlett, playing him as the type of arrogant jerk who knows that he can get away with being unlikable because he’s the best at his profession. The scene where Howlett can’t find his scalpel and has a sudden meltdown really drives home the idea that the owners of the cursed antiques have become addicted to using them. As soon as Howlett can’t hold his scalpel in his hands, his smooth façade crumbles and he starts going through what can only be called withdrawal.

With its creepy atmosphere and Gorman’s sinister performance, Dr. Jack is the best episode of Friday the 13th that I’ve reviewed so far.

Retro Television Reviews: T and T 1.22 “Mickey’s Choice”

Posted on October 27, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing T. and T., a Canadian show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on Tubi!

In this episode, a spoiled little brat discover that …. well, no. I should let Mr. T tell you.

Episode 1.22 “Mickey’s Choice”

(Dir by Donald Shebib, originally aired on June 6th, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us, “a street-smart kid finds out he’s still got a few lessons to learn!”

On the mean and cold streets of Canada, Rubberhead (John Matuszak) sends 13 year-old Mickey (Jamie Shannon) on a mission to pick the pockets of the Canadians who have gathered to watch a street magician. When the police nab Mickey, Rubberheard snarls, “Don’t talk, you little punk!” before walking away.

Because Amy Taler is the only defense attorney in Canada, she gets assigned to Mickey’s case. The prosecution wants to toss Mickey in juvenile hall but Amy argues that Mickey is too young for that. Rubberhead and one of his henchmen walk into the courtroom and are properly thrown out by the judge. Mickey gives them the thumbs up signal as they leave. My question is how has Rubberhead not been arrested as he seems to have absolutely no idea how to subtle about carrying out his criminal activities. Also, why is he called Rubberhed? Is that a nickname he wanted?

Rather then send Mickey into the system, Amy arranges for Mickey to be released into the custody of T.S. Turner. Amy is able to pull this off despite the fact that Turner is an ex-con, her hair is a mess, and Turner is late coming to court. Luckily, the judge is a fan of boxing and he decides that Turner’s former career as a boxer is the perfect justification for giving him custody of a rebellious 13 year-old.

As Turner, Amy, and Mickey leave the courthouse, they are confronted by Rubberhead and his gang. One of them tries to grab Amy.

“Excuse me, brother,” Turner says, “that’s no way to treat a lady.”

Taking advantage of the distraction, Mickey runs for it. After telling Rubberhead, “I’ll deal with you later, punk,” Turner takes off after him.

Fortunately, Turner is able to grab Mickey and drop him off with Aunt Martha (Jackie Richardson) and Renee (Rachael Crawford). Aunt Martha puts Mickey to work peeling potatoes. Turner then heads out to try to track down Rubberhead and his gang.

“When I was younger, I was Mickey,” Turner explains, “I broke my mother’s heart!”

However, despite saying that he’s going to go out and find Rubberhead, the next scene finds Turner having dinner with Mickey, Aunt Martha, and Renee. Turner leads the group in saying grace and even Mickey bows his head.

That night, Rubberhead leaves a bag of burning trash on Aunt Martha’s porch. While Turner is distracted by the fire, Rubberhead breaks into the house and grabs Mickey. Back at Rubberhead’s headquarters, Mickey brags about how tough he is until Rubberhead demands to know what he told the police.

We then cut to Turner asking various Canadians if they’ve seen Mickey. “Look, brother,” Turner says at one point, “I’ve asked politely and I’ve asked nicely. Now, I’m just asking.” Frustrated by one dead end after another, Turner goes to the gym and lifts weights for several minutes.

“That’s how he thinks,” gym owner Decker explains as Turner shouts, “MORE WEIGHT!”

Somehow, all of this weight lifting leads to Turner figuring out where Rubberhead is headquartered. Turner heads down to Rubberhead’s warehouse, where he is promptly captured and tied to a chair by Rubberhead’s gang. Rubberhead announces that both Turner and Mickey will be dropped down an elevator shaft.

“You gotta make a choice, Mickey,” Turner says, “Right or wrong.”

Mickey unties Turner and Turner tosses a motorcycle at Rubberhead, taking out both him and his gang. Turner and Mickey then rush to the courthouse, where Amy has been stalling a court hearing on Mickey’s future. Mickey reveals all that he knows about Rubberhead and his gang. SNITCH!

This is definitely an episode that suffered from trying to tell a 60-minute story in only 30. Seriously, the narrative jumped around so much and was so haphazardly edited that it was a struggle to keep track of what was going on. That said, Canada is a safer place thanks to T.S. Turner and that’s the important thing. That’s why they put their faith in him.