Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 3.7 “El Viejo”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, Willie Nelson and Steve Buscemi guest star!

Episode 3.7 “El Viejo”

(Dir by Aaron Lipstadt, originally aired on November 7th, 1986)

Using their undercover identities of Burnett and Cooper, Crockett and Tubbs are attempting to take down a Bolivian drug lord named Mendez (Anwar Zayden).  Unfortunately, Crockett’s first attempt to bust Mendez does not go so well.  Their meeting, which is being held at a museum for some reason, is interrupted by a security guard.  In the resulting shootout, the security guard is killed and a green briefcase that’s full of cocaine is stolen by an old man named Jake Pierson (Willie Nelson).  Soon, Jake is attempting to contact Mendez himself, offering to bring him the briefcase.  Jake’s actions also bring him to the attention of Crockett and Tubbs, who both wonder why a 66 year-old Texan with no criminal record is suddenly trying to get involved in their drug deal.

Jake, it turns out, is a former Texas Ranger.  When he was younger, he was a legend.  He and his partner took down criminals like Bonnie and Clyde and protected Texas from Mexican revolutionaries who were preying on the border towns.  It’s been a while since Jack retired.  Now, he lives in a tiny apartment and spends most of his time thinking about the past.  He’s still a killer shot with a gun and knows how to handle himself in a fight.  But he also has a heart condition and, in fact, he would have died early on in the episode if Tubbs hadn’t given him his pills.  Crockett, for his part, idolizes the Texas Rangers, to an extent that almost seems out-of-character when you consider how cynical Crockett is usually portrayed as being.  Crockett is stunned that a former Ranger would be involved with running drugs.  Even though he’s pretending to be career criminal Sonny Burnett, Crockett still asks Jake about all of his adventures as a Ranger and does little to hide how impressed he is.

So, why has Jake gone over to the bad side?  Well, he really hasn’t.  It turns out that the son of his former partner was murdered by Mendez and Jake is looking to get revenge.  It all leads to a number of shoot-outs, including an exciting one that occurs on a Miami highway and an explosive finale at a cemetery.  Jake kills Mendez and his men but, in typical Miami Vice fashion, he takes a bullet himself and dies right after he reveals that he knew Crockett was a cop all along.

This episode features two notable guest stars.  Along with Willie Nelson, Steve Buscemi shows up in a small but memorable role as Rickles, who serves as a go-between for Crockett and Mendez.  Buscemi is as wonderfully weaselly as ever and, even though he’s a bit stiff as an actor, Nelson still brings a lot of Texas authenticity to the character of Jake Pierson.  Of course, in real life, Vice would have stopped Willie and searched his tour bus as soon as he entered the Miami city limits.  This is a pretty dark episode but it’s still amusing to watch iconic hippie stoner Willie Nelson play a cop, even if Jake is retired.

This was a good episode.  That Don Johnson and Willie Nelson were friends in real life is easy to deduce from witnessing how easily they play off of each other in this episode.  This is another episode where the bad guys are defeated but at the cost of a good guy.  Mendez will soon be replaced by another drug lord but no one will ever replace Jake Pierson.

 

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.20 “Payback”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

After taking a two-month hiatus, I think it’s time to finally get back to the reviews.  Thank you for your patience, everyone.  Now, let’s head to down to Miami for some Vice!

Episode 2.20 “Payback”

(Dir by Aaron Lipstadt, originally aired on March 14th, 1986)

A low-level drug dealer named Jesus Moroto (Roberto Duran) wants a meeting with the detective who arrested him and sent him to jail.  When Sonny Crockett arrives to see what Moroto wants, Sonny is shocked when Moroto commits suicide in the visitation room.

Sudden and violent deaths are a recurring thing in Miami but the death of Moroto haunts Sonny.  As Sonny explains to Tubbs, it doesn’t make any sense for Moroto, who was only looking at a few years in jail, to have killed himself.  Sonny wonders why Moroto died in front of him.  Tubbs suggests that Sonny instead focus on their current assignment, trying to get close to the elusive drug lord, Mario Fuente (played by famed art rocker, Frank Zappa).  As a lot of drug lords do on this show, Fuente lives on a yacht and it’s next to impossible to see him.  Using their undercover identities as Burnett and Cooper, Crockett and Tubbs have so far only been able to meet with Fuente’s second-in-command, Reuben Reydolfo (Dan Hedaya).

Crockett and Tubbs find themselves assigned to work with two DEA agents, one whom — Kevin Cates (Graham Beckel) — claims that he can get Crockett and Tubbs onto Fuente’s boat.  Crockett and Tubbs are reluctant to work with anyone but it soon turns out that Cates is apparently better at his job than Crockett and Tubbs gave him credit for.

Except, of course, everyone’s got a secret.  Before he went to jail, Moroto stole several million dollars from Fuente.  It turns out that Internal Affairs is convinced that Crockett helped Moroto steal the money and Fuente, who knows that Burnett and Cooper are actually Crockett and Tubbs, believes the same thing.  The only person who can truly prove that Crockett is innocent is Kevin Cates and that’s because he’s the one who stole the money!

It doesn’t matter that the twisty plot of this particular episode is not always easy to follow.  It also doesn’t matter that this episode leaves you wondering just how exactly Crockett and Tubbs have managed to maintain their Burnett/Cooper personas for so long without everyone in Miami’s underworld figuring out the truth.  (Personally, I wonder that after every episode.)  This episode works due to the atmospheric direction of Aaron Lipstadt and the performances of Don Johnson, Edward James Olmos, Frank Zappa, and especially Graham Beckel.  Beckel gives a performance that will keep you guessing at just who exactly Kevin Cates is working for and whether or not he can be trusted.  That he makes Kevin into a somewhat likable character makes it all the more disturbing when he turns out to not be quite the honest law enforcer that he made himself out to be.  If the main theme of Miami Vice often seemed to be that Crockett and Tubbs were fighting a war that there was no way to win, this episode shows why their work often felt so futile.  In this episode, Crockett not only has to battle a drug lord but he also has to battle Internal Affairs.  No one trusts anyone.

The episode ends on an ambiguous note, with Crockett technically cleared but still unable to truly prove his innocence.  (Kevin Cates, the only man who can truly prove Crockett’s innocence, is naturally gunned down during the show’s final few minutes.)  Crockett is warned that Fuente is still going to be coming after him.  (Unfortunately, Zappa was in poor health when he filmed this episode and Fuente would never return.)  This episode is Miami Vice at its most cynical and its most effective.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.14 “Yankee Dollar”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, Sonny’s latest girlfriend gets involved in the drug trade.

Episode 2.14 “Yankee Dollar”

(Dir by Aaron Lipstadt, originally aired on January 17th, 1986)

It’s another night in Miami.  Sonny Crockett is looking forward to driving out to the airport and picking up his latest girlfriend, a flight attendant named Sarah (Audrey Matson).  For two years, Sarah has been working the Miami to Bogota to Paris and back route.  She doesn’t make a lot of money but, as is typical for this show, she lives in a small but very nicely furnished house.

Unfortunately, Sarah dies shortly after Sonny picks her up.  She goes into cardiac arrest, the result of a balloon of cocaine bursting inside of her.  It turns out that Sarah was working as a drug mule, all so she could make a quick five grand and buy a used BMW.

Seriously, what are the chances that Sonny Crockett’s girlfriend would turn out to be a drug smuggler?  Maybe she thought she was dating Sonny Burnett.  Or maybe, like so many others on this show, she allowed her desire for the finer things in life — like a BMW — to lead her astray.  This is one of the major themes of Miami Vice.  In a society where conspicuous consumption rules, people will do anything to appear richer than they actually are.

When Sonny and Rico arrest Sarah’s brother, Tim (Clayton Rohner), they discover that he works for a wealthy businessman named Charlie Glide (Ned Eisenberg).  Everyone knows that Charlie Glide (a great name, by the way) is involved in the drug trade but no one has ever been able to pin anything on him.  In the past, Charlie avoided cocaine but he’s now looking to branch out.  Sonny and Rico go undercover to try to bring Charlie down.

Of course, it doesn’t work.  Charlie is smart enough to figure out that Sonny and Rico are trying to set him up.  Even after Crockett and Tubbs drag him down to the police station and Charlie makes a deal for immunity in return for setting up two other drug dealers (Anne Carlisle and Pepe Serna), he still tries to double cross the cops.  And even though the double cross doesn’t quite work, Charlie remains smug in his knowledge that he has immunity.

Except, of course, he doesn’t have immunity from all crimes.  Earlier in the episode, Charlie’s executive assistant, Max Rogo (Austin Pendleton), used Charlie’s gun to execute Tim.  Even though Crockett and Tubbs know that Max is the one who pulled the trigger and that Max is the one who decided to kill Tim, they still arrest Charlie for the murder.  (Max was apparently killed in an earlier shootout so it’s not like he’s around to tell the truth.)  “You changed the rules!” Charlie shouts as he’s dragged away.

This episode is Miami Vice at its most cynical.  Crockett and Tubbs can’t get Charlie for the crime he committed so, instead, they set him up for a crime he didn’t commit.  They did change the rules in that they decided they no longer have to follow them.  The episode is full of characters so desperate for money that they’ll do just about anything, even smuggling a lethal drug in their body.  Crockett can only watch helplessly as Sarah dies and, even as Charlie is taken away, there’s never any doubt that he’ll be replaced by someone else, the drug trade will continue, and more people will die just because they wanted to be able to afford a few extra things.  Crockett and Tubbs are fighting a war that can never be won.  Whatever victories they get ultimately feel hollow.  Arresting Charlie won’t bring Sarah back and it won’t stop more innocent people from dying.  Ned Eisenberg was wonderfully smug as Charlie Glide and Austin Pendleton was appropriately creepy as the always-smiling Max Rogo.  This was a good episode, one that challenged the traditional cop show narrative.  How long can one fight a losing war?

Cinemax Friday: City Limits (1984, directed by Aaron Lipstadt)


Fifteen years into the future, a plague has wiped out almost everyone legally old enough to drink and it has instead left behind a post-apocalyptic hellscape dominated by teenagers.  Tired of living in the boring desert, Lee (John Stockwell) hops on his motorcycle, puts on a skull mask, and drives to a nearby city.  He hopes to join the Clippers, one of the two gangs that is fighting for control of the city.  However, the Clippers aren’t as easy to join as Lee thought they would be.  As well, an evil corporation (led by Robby Benson of all people) is manipulating the two gangs as a part of a plan to take over the city and also the world.

City Limits is one of those films that would probably be totally forgotten if it hadn’t been featured on an episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000.  It’s a good episode but, unfortunately, it’s also led to City Limits getting a reputation for worse than it actually is.

City Limits is a dumb, low-budget movie that was made to capitalize on the success of films like Mad Max.  The plot is impossible to follow, too many scenes are shot in the middle of the night, and Robby Benson is somehow even less intimidating as the villain as you would expect him to be.  (All of Benson’s scenes take place in the same bare office and feature him sitting at a desk.  It probably took a day at most for Benson to do all of his scenes.)  Even with all that in mind, though, City Limits is a fun movie, especially if you can turn off your mind, just relax, and not worry about trying to make it all make sense.  John Stockwell is a likably goofy hero and, Benson aside, the film has got a surprisingly good supporting cast, including Rae Dawn Chong, Kim Cattrall, Tony Plana, Darrell Larson, and even Kane Hodder in a blink-and-you’ll-miss-him type of role.  James Earl Jones wears a big fur coat and blows people up.  He also narrates the film, which automatically elevates everything that happens.  Some of the action scenes are exciting.  Fans of people shouting insults while riding motorcycles will find a lot to enjoy in City Limits.  And, finally, there are a few genuinely funny moments.  I loved that the gangs borrowed all of their plans for old comic books.

City Limits is stupid but entertaining, whether you’re watching it on your own or with Joel and the Bots.