I’ve seen Charlie Brown suffer through a lot of holidays but I’ve always felt especially bad for him when it comes to Valentine’s Day. In this scene from Be My Valentine, Charlie Brown, he’s waiting at the mailbox for a Valentine from a “little red-headed girl.” He’s never even talked to her. He doesn’t know her name and she probably doesn’t know his. She certainly doesn’t know his address. How is she going to send him a Valentine? Lucy could have been nicer in the way she put it but she’s right. He’ll need a lot of luck.
Luckily, his loyal dog is there to shoot cupid’s arrows at him.
4 (or more) Shots From 4 (or more) Films is just what it says it is, 4 (or more) shots from 4 (or more) of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 (or more) Shots From 4 (or more) Films lets the visuals do the talking.
82 years ago, on this date, the late director Alan Parker was born in London. One of the many British directors, like the Scott brothers and Adrian Lyne, who began by directing advertisements, Parker went on to become a director known for both his intense visual style and his revolutionary use of music as a storytelling device. It’s time for….
4 Shots From 4 Alan Parker Films
Midnight Express (1978, dir by Alan Parker, DP: Michael Seresin)
Fame (1980, dir by Alan Parker, DP: Michael Seresin)
Pink Floyd — The Wall (1982, dir by Alan Parker, DP: Peter Bizou)
Angel Heart (1987, dir by Alan Parker, DP: Michael Seresin)
As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in a few weekly live tweets on twitter. I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie! Every week, we get together. We watch a movie. We tweet our way through it.
Tonight, at 9 pm et, Deanna Dawn will be hosting #ScarySocial! The movie? The original Halloween!
If you want to join us this Saturday, just hop onto twitter, start the movie at 9 pm et, and use the #ScarySocial hashtag! It’s a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.
I know this holiday isn’t for everyone but it’s always been one of my favorites. Love is in the air! If you’re single, though, this can be a difficult day. If you’ve just broken up with someone, this is the day when you just want to stay in bed. Everyone’s been there!
If you’re celebrating today, I hope you have a wonderful Valentine’s Day! And, if you’re not celebrating, I hope you enjoy your Presidents Day weekend!
Today’s music video of the day is for the song that was, of course, the theme song for the 1983 James Bond film, Octopussy. Apparently, the producers realized that there weren’t many words that comfortably rhymed with the movie’s title so they tasked John Barry and Tim Rice with coming up with a theme song that would still be radio friendly. They came up with All Time High. I know that some consider this to be a lesser Bond theme song but I absolutely love it. Some of that might be because this is one of the few songs that I can actually sing all the way through without going off-key.
And it’s the perfect Valentine’s Day song! I’ll be singing this song later tonight. Actually, I’ll be singing a medly of James Bond theme songs tonight. It’s kind of a Valentine’s Day tradition….
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Freddy’s Nightmares, a horror anthology show which ran in syndication from 1988 to 1990. The entire series can be found on Tubi!
This week, two more people fall victim to Springwood, Ohio.
Episode 2.2 “Heartbreak Hotel”
(Dir by William Malone, originally aired on October 15th, 1989)
“Learn to use the proper pronouns …. OR DIE!” Freddy shouts at us this week and he has a point.
When tabloid reporter Roger Dittano (John Stinson) is sent to Springwood to write a story about an Elvis sighting at a local hotel, he discovers that everything he writes comes true. He writes about a woman having a demon child and, a few minutes later, a pregnant maid goes into labor and gives birth to a deformed stillborn baby. Roger writes about a man being electrocuted in a bathtub and, shortly afterwards, he’s nearly electrocuted while taking a bath.
When Roger discovers that a newspaper publisher (played by Stacy Keach, Sr., father of the better-known Stacy Keach) is staying at the hotel, he comes up with the following story. “Newspaper publisher leaves empire to reporter after he drinks poison.” Hey, Roger — who drank the poison!? The reporter or the newspaper publisher? As you can guess, Roger’s vague wording leading to him drinking arsenic and dying as the publisher laughs and says, “Oh, and I’m leaving my empire to you!”
That was actually a pretty clever story. For once, the show actually did the work to set up the twist. Roger spends the entire episode being told that he’s a sloppy writer. In the end, that sloppiness kills him.
The second story also has a twist but it’s nowhere near as interesting. An amnesiac named Jerry (Richard Cox) wakes up in a hospital after a car accident. A woman (Anne Lockhart) claims to be the Jerry’s wife. A teenage girl (Tammy Ames) claims to be Jerry’s daughter. Jerry goes home with both of them and is soon haunted by nightmares in which he sees himself killing a man. You can probably guess that Jerry is not married and he does not have a daughter. This story had a lot of noir atmosphere — right down to a saxophone wailing away on the soundtrack — but it was also pretty predictable.
My sister asked me to watch and review this one. I’ll have to remember to thank her for that.
A group of cheerleaders go to a cheerleading camp for the summer. In between all of the usual camp shenanigans, someone is killing the cheerleaders. Alison (Betsy Russell) seems like the likeliest suspect because she keeps having weird dreams and is really possessive of her unfaithful boyfriend, Brent (Leif Garrett). Is Alison the murderer or is she being set up? Cheerleading is a cut-throat business so anything is possible.
As a former cheerleader, there were a few scenes that I could relate to. Alison has the same nightmare that I used to have all through high school, where you show up for the game late, you have to put on your uniform in such a rush that you don’t even have time to put on a bra, and then you run out on the field and no one’s there. I had that dream a hundred times. And the movie was right about everyone making fun of the mascot. I felt bad for Cory (Lucinda Dickey).
Overall, the movie left me with some questions. The main one was whether or not these were supposed to be high school or college cheerleaders. Some of them looked really old to still be in high school. Brent had a receding hairline. I also wondered why there was a pervy fat guy on Alison’s cheerleading squad. There’s nothing wrong with male cheerleaders but I would not be comfortable with a male cheerleader who kept trying to see all of the other cheerleaders naked. Finally, I wondered how everyone at the camp could be so stupid. Why would anyone stay after the first dead body is found? I liked Alison but even I groaned when she picked up a bloody meat cleaver. Girl, that’s evidence! Don’t get your fingerprints on that! I also figured out who the murderer was after the first fifteen minutes. It was pretty obvious.
I enjoyed cheering but I’m glad I never went to that cheerleader camp. Most of the routines were awful and everyone ended up dead. It’s not worth it.
The sad truth of the matter is that the Friday the 13th films haven’t done much for the New Jersey summer camp industry.
Seriously, Crystal Lake is such a pretty location. The lake looks beautiful with the sun rising over it and the water literally beckons you to toss off all your clothes and go for a swim. The woods feature green trees and are full of animals and mysterious shacks. The nearby town is home to people like Enos the Truck Driver, Ralph the Prophet, and a countless number of waitresses who will give you directions and gossip if you ask politely. And then you’ve got Camp Crystal Lake, which has cabins and a generator and an archery range and a lot of outdoor showers. Seriously, Camp Crystal Lake encompasses the natural beauty that New Jersey was once known for.
Unfortunately, none of that matters. A few stupid camp counselors managed to get themselves killed by Betsy Palmer and now, no one wants to go to New Jersey anymore. Before Friday the 13th, New Jersey was a state for the entire family. After Friday the 13th, it became a state for a different sort of family. My point is that the Friday the 13th films are directly responsible for the Mafia taking over New Jersey. I don’t care how much they blame Lucky Luciano. Jason Voorhees is responsible for organized crime.
Anyway, that’s my long-winded explanation for why no one wants to vacation at Camp Crystal Lake anymore. It’s now known as Camp Blood and no one wants to hang out at a place where they might get killed or, even worse, get lost in the Pine Barrens. Instead, people decide to vacation at much safer locations …. like Camp Murder!
2020’s Camp Murder takes place at the camp of the same nickname. Throughout the film, everyone talks about what a dump Camp Murder is but, from what we see of it, it looks perfectly pleasant. It might be a little isolated and a little neglected but it hardly seems like the Hellhole that everyone keeps describing. A group of people are vacationing at Camp Murder, secure in the knowledge that infamous murderer “Terrible” Tommy Heller (Jeff Kirkendall) has been safely locked away from 25 years. Except — uh oh! — Tommy’s escaped! Dr. Lewis (Noyes J. Lawton) is searching for him but will he be able to find him before Tommy has wiped out the majority of the cast?
Camp Murder is one of Mark Polonia’s cheerfully low-budget horror films. Polonia specializes in horror-on-budget. His films aren’t exactly good but they’re made and often performed with such enthusiasm that it’s easier to forgive their flaws than certain other low-budget entries in the genre. When it comes to a Polonia film, you know what you’re going to get so I’m going to focus on two positive aspects of the film.
First off, Terrible Tommy is actually a pretty effective villain. His mask is genuinely disturbing and Jeff Kirkendall is properly menacing and relentless in the role.
Second, there’s a shot of two women walking towards a deserted barn that is actually effectively creepy.
As for the rest of the film, the pace is slow and the acting is often amateurish. Some of the gore effects work. It’s a shot-on-video slasher film. You know what you’re getting into when you starting watching it. The tourism industry will survive Camp Murder and that’s a good thing.
In 1984’s The Initiation, Daphne Zuniga plays Kelly Fairchild, a college student who is haunted by a recurring nightmare in which she, as a child, watches a man get burned alive in her childhood home. Kelly, who can’t remember anything about her life before the age of ten, signs up for sleep study but her mother, Francesca (Vera Miles), strictly forbids it. Kelly is far too busy and far too rich to have her dreams analyzed.
And really, Kelly does have a lot going on in her life at the moment. She’s a student at SMU. She’s pledging to a sorority. Her father (Clu Gulager) owns one of Dallas’s biggest department stores and Kelly has the key so that the sorority pledges can spend the night inside the “deserted” building. Sure, a patient with extensive burn scars has recently escaped from a mental hospital but what could that possibly have to do with Kelly and her disturbing dreams?
The Initiation is a film that takes a while to really get going. The film spends a lot of time on just Kelly walking around the SMU campus and visiting her parents in Highland Park. Eventually, though, Kelly, Marcia (Marilyn Kagan), and Alison (Hunter Tylo) spend the night in that store, which is not quite as deserted as they were told. Not only is the president of the sorority there to play pranks but she’s invited along three goofy guys to add to the fun. Of course, there’s also the mysterious killer who proceeds to start picking everyone off, one-by-one.
The Initiation is a film that I like for a couple of reasons. One of them is that, whenever I watch this movie, I find myself shouting, “I’ve been there!” This film was set and filmed in Dallas and it accomplishes the near-impossible task of actually making the SMU campus look vaguely interesting. (SMU may be a top college but the campus has always been a bit on the dull side.) SMU is a college that I once wanted to go to, at least until I saw how much it would cost and my guidance counselor saw how unimpressive my grades were in high school. Instead, I went to UNT but I still spent a lot of time around the SMU campus because it was right next do to my favorite movie theater, the Dallas Angelika.
Meanwhile, the department store is played by Dallas Market Center. I can only imagine that trouble that the production went through to get permission to shoot there. That said, I have to admit that I found the “Vendors only” signs that appeared on several doors to be distracting. (The Dallas Market Center is largely used for trade shows.) Still, it was a good and atmospheric location for the slasher mayhem.
While it does take a while for that mayhem to start, the kills are all memorably nasty and bloody and actually rather frightening. I’ve always felt that, if you’re going to make a movie like this, you should go all out. There should just be blood and guts everywhere and The Initiation doesn’t shy away from that. The fact that the victims are largely played by likable actors only makes the deaths more effective.
Finally, The Initiation ends with one of those totally out-there twists that a viewer like me just can’t help but love. It’s a totally ludicrous twist but it’s just so weird and random that it was impossible not to enjoy.
Now, to be clear, The Initiation is not a lost classic. As I mentioned earlier, it takes a while for the action to really get started and there are a few early scenes that definitely drag. The film’s original director was fired after shooting began and, as a result, the film itself feels a bit disjointed. It’s obvious that the original director had a much different vision than the director who replaced him. But, even with all that taken into account, The Initiation is still a hundred times more effective than it probably has any right to be. It’s ultimately an effective and memorable slasher film.
Through the Shattered Lens 