Consider the plot of 2022’s A Royal Christmas On Ice.
He’s a prince.
She’s a former Olympic skater turned hard-as-nails coach.
They meet in a small town.
They fall in love….
AT CHRISTMAS!
Seriously, has there ever been a film more obviously made for me? This is a cute movie and a reminder that you can find just about anything in Fred Olen Ray’s filmography.
In this scene, from Sergio Corbucci’s Django, the film’s title character (played by my man, Franco Nero) reveals what’s actually in the coffin that he’s been dragging from town to town.
Spoiled heiress Joanna Stayton (Goldie Hawn) hires carpenter Dean Proffitt (Kurt Russell) to remodel a closet on her yacht. Unsatisfied with his work and completely unreasonable about everything, she refuses to pay him and when he presses her for the $600, she pushes him and all of his tools overboard. Needless to say, the lady’s a “bitch” (Dean’s word) and nobody can stand her, including her husband, Grant Stayton III (Edward Herrman), and their butler Andrew (Roddy McDowell). And then something interesting happens a few days later… Joanna accidentally falls off her yacht, and when she’s fished out of the ocean, she’s still difficult to deal with, but she doesn’t have a clue who she is. Unable to identity her, the hospital puts the “amnesia lady” on the news hoping someone will recognize her. Sensing a chance to get rid of the anchor around his neck, Grant Stayton III pretends he doesn’t know her and heads out of town. This is where Dean hatches up his own plot to get revenge. He heads to the hospital and through a series of happenstances and coincidences, he’s able to convince everyone, including Joanna, now dubbed as “Annie,” that she’s his wife. He takes her home with him and makes her take care of his four wild boys, cook their food, and clean his house. Dean figures she owes it to him. But wouldn’t you know it, even though “Annie” hates it at first, over time she begins to soften towards her new life, bonds with the boys, and some sparks of love start flying between her and Dean. When she unexpectedly gets her memory back, she has to decide whether to return to her life as a spoiled heiress or stay with the man and boys she’s grown to love.
I have a soft spot in my heart for OVERBOARD, because this is a movie that my mom and I both loved, and we watched it together many times in the late 80’s and early 90’s. My mom and I didn’t often have the same taste in movies, so this was kind of “our movie.” There are a couple of other notable favorites for both me and mom, and those movies are RUTHLESS PEOPLE (1986) and LETHAL WEAPON (1987). I guarantee if I called my mom right now, interrupted her Hallmark Christmas movies, and told her I was coming over with OVERBOARD, she’d say “Come on! I’ll get something together for you to eat!” That actually sounds like a pretty good idea!
Another reason I love OVERBOARD is the fact that it stars Kurt Russell. I became a big fan of Kurt Russell during my teenage years, as I was 14 when this movie came out. A couple of years earlier, Russell starred in the films THE BEST OF TIMES (1986) and BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA (1986), and a couple of years later he would make movies like TEQUILA SUNRISE (1988), TANGO & CASH (1989), and BACKDRAFT (1991). I wanted to watch every movie that Russell was in, and all of these films are staples of my VHS years and nostalgic favorites. In OVERBOARD, Russell starts off as a gruff, grudge-holder, but as he begins to fall for “Annie,” his natural charm and likability emerge, but so does a newfound guilt for lying to her and possibly even kidnapping her. One question for the lawyers out there, is it kidnapping when her husband had a chance to claim her and chose to abandon her instead? I’m not sure if it’s a felony or not, but I’m guessing there has to be something on the law books that doesn’t jive with what happens here. Anyway, I’ll just say that it’s best not to think of these types of pesky realities when judging this fairy tale and just go along for the ride.
Along with the Russell’s fun performance, Goldie Hawn is so perfect as the horrifically spoiled snob of an heiress who transforms into a caring substitute mother and the woman of Dean’s dreams. I know she’s great in the movie, because I can’t stand her at the beginning, but I find myself falling for her too as the movie progresses. I would not really call myself a fan of Goldie Hawn, because I haven’t spent much of my life revisiting her films, but I love her here. A couple in real life, the natural chemistry between Russell and Hawn sparkles as they fall in love on screen and only the most cold-hearted cynic isn’t pulling for them to live happily ever after as the movie closes in on its ending. As far as the supporting cast, Edward Herrmann, Katherine Helmond, Mike Hagerty, and Roddy McDowall all have good moments sprinkled throughout the film.
I do have one complaint about OVERBOARD, and that’s the “Wonders of the World Miniature Golf Course,” which is the dream business of Dean and his best friend Bad Billy Pratt (Mike Hagerty). As someone who grew up in the 70’s and 80’s playing miniature golf on the courses in Branson, MO, I would never want to play their course. Its design appears over-the-top and cheesy to me, the type of course where the scores on the holes would be determined as much by luck as by skill, which is something I find offensive. However, just like the potential kidnapping storyline, I’ve had to let my disdain for the quality of the course design go as well so I could enjoy that section of the film. I will admit this one is harder for me personally, and I still struggle with it.
Overall, OVERBOARD is not high art, and its premise is about as silly as it gets, but through a magical combination of personal 1980’s nostalgia, an appreciation for the chemistry of its stars, and a complete willingness to suspend my disbelief as we head towards an irresistibly happy ending, I still love this film. I watch it just about every year, especially if I need a pick me up as I hammer away at tax returns!
I watched Christmas Caper with Lisa and, as always, it was a wonderful time. It’s weird to have a friend who is way cooler than you, but I’ll take it! “Christmas Caper” had some great lines and a clear story arc, but was what really stands is its similarity to “Dazed and Confused” in this way: it was a springboard for many careers attached to it. April Blair, the writer, went on to write for… everything and the actors all had bright careers for decades. I’m used to Hallmark, which is A LOT more strict. I was in talks to have script made for Hallmark, but it was funny and had Mrs. Claus as the heroine and they just couldn’t wrap their heads around a female lead like that. Here, we have Cate Dove (Shannen Doherty), a gentlewoman thief, who is the heroine- Hallmark would say – BLASPHEMY!!!! Needless to say, I was primed to enjoy this movie.
The film opens with Cate and Clive (Conrad Coates) who are doing a “Mission Impossible” style heist at a home that has A LOT of security. For a plot device, both Cate and Clive remove their masks for the security cameras. (Note: To the homeowner, maybe you should move? I get that you have this fancy pants gem in your house and the schools are a 10/10 on “SchoolDigger,” but if you have this many problems with crime, have you considered another neighborhood or starting a neighborhood watch? I understand it’s hard to move, but I had to pull the trigger on that and leave my beloved Seattle. It’s ok bro, let’s hug it out and call Remax.) They steal a precious gem, but Clive runs off with the gem, leaving Cate to escape as best she can, but there’s a APB out for her with a picture of her everywhere.
Cate flees to NYC to go to her fence Duffy (Michael Northey) to figure out her next move. The inciting incident is that Cate has a goody too shoes sister Savannah (Sonya Salomaa) who is trapped in the Caribbean with her husband Brian and they need child care. Cate is Savannah’s last choice because she’s a degenerate, but Cate decides to watch her niece and nephew because she needs to lay low. Cate goes to Comfort, USA and watches the kids. She rekindles a relationship with her ex who is Sheriff Harrison (Ty Olsson). The mixture of family time, romance, and Christmas puts her on a good character arc.
However, when she tries to get the gem back from Clive, she involves her niece and nephew. I didn’t really that for stranger danger issues, but it added some good comic relief and key plot point. When Cate thinks she has no money to escape and avoid arrest, she steals everyone’s Christmas presents like the Grinch, BUT her heart grows three sizes that day and she returns them all – sort of.
The movie has a nice ending and I liked the act breaks a lot. The movie had clear plot points and that makes sense because the writer, April Blair, had a HUGE career writing for television. I absolutely recommend watching this film on Tubi. It really is a lot of fun!
Oh no! Christmas is approaching but Santa Claus is trapped on a beach in Florida! A bunch of kids try to help him move his sled but the children are useless! Maybe Santa’s friend, the Ice Cream Bunny, can help. While Santa waits for the Bunny to show up, he tells the kids a story.
It’s a bit difficult to explain the plot of 1972’s Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny. It’s even more difficult to explain why I can’t help but love this odd movie. The Ice Cream Bunny driving to the rescue is one of my favorite holiday images. Don’t ask me why he’s the Ice Cream Bunny. Don’t ask me why Santa needs the help of a giant rabbit. Don’t ask me why Santa’s on a beach in Florida in the first place.
Just enjoy this holiday oddity!
In 2014’s So This Is Christmas, Eric Roberts and Vivica A. Fox play a married couple!
That’s really not the plot of the film but it is probably the main reason why most people will watch it. Roberts and Fox have been frequent co-stars over the past few years, thanks to the “Wrong” films on Lifetime. In this film, we get to see them as a couple and, while they don’t exactly have the greatest romantic chemistry, we do get to watch as the sing a duet of Mary, Did You Know?
Both Eric Roberts and Vivica A. Fox get to do more actual acting than they usually do whenever they appear in low budget films like this one. Roberts is the father of Ashley (Lexi Ainsworth), an alcoholic teenager who leaves the house in sparkly booty shorts and who has a best friend who is supposed to be in high school but who appears to be about 40 years old. Fox is the mother of Jason (Titus Mankin, Jr.), who has a pregnant girlfriend and a growing cocaine addiction….
That may sound like some fairly heavy stuff for a Christmas movie. What’s interesting is that the film still largely takes a Hallmark approach, even while the characters are getting drunk, cursing, and nearly getting killed as a result. Ashley starts to change her ways when a groundskeeper named Mac (Bryan Massey) recruits her to help direct the Christmas show at the local shelter. Jason learns an important lesson after his girlfriend is put in a coma as a result of his own stupid decisions….
It’s kind of an unpleasant film, to be honest. Scenes of Ashley earnestly working on the play are mixed with smokey scenes of drug dealers threatening to kill everyone. It’s a mishmash of styles that doesn’t come together and, at nearly two hours, the film drags considerably.
That said …. Eric Roberts and Vivica A. Fox! Singing!
Previous Eric Roberts Films That We Have Reviewed:
Life takes an unexpected turn for the reserved Englishman William Thacker (Hugh Grant) when the hugely popular American movie star Anna Scott (Julia Roberts) wanders into his humble little travel book shop in the district of Notting Hill in West London. When the initial meeting is followed up by some coincidentally spilled orange juice and an unexpected kiss, William finds himself completely smitten. After Anna leaves, and still in a state of disbelief, William struggles focusing on his normal life with his eccentrically odd flat mate Spike (Rhys Ifans). When Anna surprisingly reaches back out to him wanting to get back together, the sweet and shy William is ecstatic, but he remembers that he’s already obligated himself to attend his sister Honey’s (Emma Chambers) birthday party that night. Wanting to be part of something normal, Anna goes to the party as William’s date, where she has a wonderful, relaxing evening with Honey and their close-knit group of best friends that includes Max (Tim McInnerny), Bella (Gina McKee) and Bernie (Hugh Bonneville), even if she did give them quite the shock when she walked through the door. Everything seems to be going beautifully, but the life of an international film icon tends to be complicated, and William soon finds himself caught up in a whirlwind that includes her “boyfriend,” the arrogant American actor Jeff King (Alec Baldwin). He’s not really her boyfriend anymore, but that seems of little consequence to the press. And then there’s the sudden emergence of racy pictures of Anna from her past in the British tabloids. As much as William loves Anna, will he ever be able to deal with life in Anna’s superstar spotlight?
NOTTING HILL is part of a trilogy of modern-day love stories that I’m sure to watch every year, with the other two being RETURN TO ME (2000) and HITCH (2005). I’ve noticed that these three movies have plot points in common that I find extremely appealing. First, both NOTTING HILL and RETURN TO ME feature main characters who have a group of loyal family and friends who offer uncompromising love and support. William Thacker’s sister and friends clearly care about him and want what’s best for him. If necessary, they’re willing to prove it by being honest with him when he’s unwilling to be honest with himself. One of the best scenes of the film occurs near the end when William tells his group of friends that he’s turned down Anna’s request to continue their relationship, even after she says the famous lines, “I’m also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.” While his friends struggle to find the right words, the flaky Spike, played superbly by Rhys Ifans, rushes into the meeting and when asked his opinion, says these three words to William, “You daft prick!” A memorable song on the movie’s excellent soundtrack reminds us sometimes that “you say it best when you say nothing at all,” but sometimes words need to be spoken, and Spike cares enough to tell William what he needs to hear. I’ve said it before, but I love it when a movie surrounds its characters with the type of people we’d love to have in our corner in real life. Second, both NOTTING HILL and HITCH feature plot lines that show a “star” falling for a sweet nobody. Maybe it’s because I’m a nobody myself, but the idea of the rich and powerful falling in love with regular people like me always strikes a nerve. Sure, it may be a fantasy, but it’s a fantasy I’m perfectly willing to roll with.
As far as I’m concerned, Julia Roberts and Hugh Grant have never been more appealing than they are in NOTTING HILL. Julia is so beautiful, and I fell in love with her myself for the first time when I watched this movie at the theater in 1999. There are scenes where William is watching Anna Scott on the big screen and the small screen, whether it be a love story or a science fiction movie, and he’s clearly in complete awe of her. As a film buff going back to my early teens, I can relate so easily to his character, whether it be my crush on Elizabeth Shue in the 80’s or Salma Hayek in 90’s. Heck, as recently as a couple of years ago, after interviewing the lovely Jan Gan Boyd who starred with Charles Bronson in ASSASSINATION (1987), I can still identify with a man completely smitten with a beautiful actress. And Hugh Grant is so sweet, witty and funny as William Thacker. This was a big film for Grant, as a few years earlier his promising Hollywood career had somewhat stalled due to his arrest on Sunset Strip in Los Angeles for “lewd conduct in a public place” with a prostitute named Divine Brown. With the irony not lost on me, if you’ve seen NOTTING HILL before you’ll understand that my inclusion of this matter of public record proves the character of Anna Scott to be correct when she explains to William just how difficult it can be to live life in the public eye. Regardless of all that, Hugh Grant is great in the film, and with a few years separating the events, it seems the filmgoing public was ready for forgiveness. NOTTING HILL was a runaway box office success, raking in $365 million dollars at the worldwide box office.
The final thing I want to point out about NOTTING HILL is the incredible talent behind the scenes. Director Roger Michell helmed one of my very favorite Jane Austen adaptations, PERSUASION from 1995, starring Amanda Root and Ciaran Hinds. It’s a perfect movie as far as I’m concerned, and I watch it several times every year. Writer Richard Curtis has written the wonderful films FOUR WEDDINGS AND A FUNERAL (1994), BRIDGET JONES’S DIARY (2001), and LOVE ACTUALLY (2003), and he clearly knows how to push our love buttons. Both Michell and Curtis do the most successful work in their careers here. Now whether or not it’s their very best is a matter of opinion, but it’s definitely great work that I can confidently recommend to anyone.
Today, we present to you 2015’s The Flight Before Christmas!
Mayim Bialik and Ryan McPartin are both on the same Christmas Eve flight. Bialik plays a woman who has given up on romance. McPartin plays a man who is flying to Boston to ask his girlfriend to marry him, even though it’s obvious that they’re not right for each other. At first, our two main characters don’t get along but then their flight is temporarily diverted to the most romantic place on Earth …. Bozeman, Montana!
You can guess what happens. You’ve probably already guessed that it occurs at a quaint Bed & Breakfast. But did you guess that Brian Doyle-Murray plays a jolly man named Noel Nichols and that …. oh, you did? Well, good for you.
It’s a cute movie, nonetheless. If there is a Santa Claus, I hope he’s played by Brian Doyle-Murray.
In 2011’s Christmas Lodge, Mary (Erin Karpluk) recovers from a recent break-up by restoring the run-down lodge where she used to spend the holidays with her family.
That’s pretty much the entire film. When I reviewed the film a few years ago, I admitted that there really wasn’t much conflict to be found in it but I also argued that was a part of the film’s appeal. It’s a holiday movie and, as such, it’s earnestness and sincerity is its main appeal.
In 2016’s Broadcasting Christmas, Melissa Joan Hart (who will always be Sabrina to me) plays Emily Morgan.
Emily is a television news journalist in Connecticut. She specializes in doing human interest stories. Years ago, Emily was up for a job with a station in New York but she lost out to her then-boyfriend, Charlie Fisher (Dean Cain). Charlie went to New York and Emily has never really forgiven him. As the Christmas season approaches, Emily finds herself reporting about the fact that America’s top morning show, Rise & Shine, is looking for a new co-host. Being considered are a basketball player, a reality TV star, and …. CHARLIE! Emily has a meltdown on air and says that she feels that she should be the new cohost of Rise and Shine. Emily’s rant goes viral and, soon enough, she’s invited to come audition for the spot.
Emily, Charlie, Abby (Krista Braun), and Jimmy Eubanks (Todd Litzinger) will be auditioning over the holiday season. They’ll take turns co-hosting with Veronika Daniels (Jackee Harry) and they will also be expected to come up with human interest stories. Emily and Charlie immediately start working hard, trying to make a good impression while also trying to resist the fact that they’re clearly both still in love with each other. Jimmy Eubanks doesn’t work at all. And Abby — well, Abby knows that she’s going to get the job and the auditions are all just for show.
Except, Abby doesn’t get the job. She gets a chance to plan a celebrity wedding and abandons the show. Now, it’s just between Emily and Charlie. Will they be able to balance falling in love with competing for the same job? Will Emily find her confidence? Will Charlie make peace with the fact that his famous father was instrumental in getting New York to select him over Emily? And how does a hundred year-old fruitcake fit into it all?
Okay, I know what you’re thinking. Yes, it’s a Hallmark holiday film and, as soon as you see their names in the credits, you immediately know that Melissa Joan Hart and Dean Cain are going to end up back together. It’s the type of film where New York is safe and beautiful and the snow falls constantly without anyone ever getting a red nose or a scratchy throat. The film’s portrayal of the behind-the-scenes shenanigans at a network show feel especially false. One doesn’t necessarily watch a film like this expecting to see anything reflecting reality but the whole idea that Veronika would have four people on her show without fully knowing what they’re planning on doing when they appear requires a huge suspension of disbelief.
That said, it’s a sweet-natured movie. Melissa Joan Hart and Dean Cain make for a cute couple and I have to say that, between her Hallmark films and her Lifetime films, Hart has shown herself to be one of the stronger performers appearing in these type of films. That’s the holiday spirit for you. Any other time of the year, I would probably roll my eyes at this film. But, watching it in December, I was just happy that Emily and Charlie realized that they still loved each other.
Awwwww!
Through the Shattered Lens 