The 1988 film Scarecrows is one that has a very simple but also very effective premise.

Scarecrows are scary as Hell.

And you know what?  There’s a lot to be said for the premise.  Seriously, I have no problem with clowns but scarecrows definitely make me nervous.  It’s the way that they’re just left out there in the middle of a field, tied to a post and seemingly staring at the world through black eyes.  I know that some people try to make scarecrows less creepy by giving them smiles but, to me, a smiling scarecrow is even creepier than a scarecrow with no expression at all.  At night, whenever you see the shadow of a scarecrow in the distance, it’s always easy to imagine it climbing off of its post and walking towards your house, its dark eyes focusing on your bedroom window the whole way.  If you’re not scared of scarecrows, you’re not paying attention.

(Of course, perhaps the scariest thing about scarecrows is that crows don’t seem to be particularly scared of them.  I mean, if the crows have figured out that they’re not human, what’s the point of having them unless you’re going to use them to summon evil spirits?)

Scarecrows opens with a daring heist.  Five paramilitary mercenaries, people who are paid to fight and kill for a living, steal three million dollars from Camp Pendleton and then force pilot Al (David James Campbell) and his teenager daughter, Kellie (Victoria Christian), to fly them to Mexico.  However, in the middle of the flight, one of the merceneries grabs the money and a parachute and jumps from the plane.  Two other mercenaries jump after him while the remaining two force Al to land the airplane.  The plane ends up landing outside of a small farm, one that appears to be deserted except for all the scarecrows….

Now, seriously, think about this.  The majority of the characters in this film are mercenaries.  They’ve been trained in every form of combat.  They’ve got weapons and they know how to use them.  They are used to fighting and, in fact, they even look forward to it.  Not only are they mercenaries but they’ve also just successfully robbed a MARINE base.  You don’t mess with the Marines unless you’re very stupid or very confident or maybe both.  Adam Driver was a Marine.  Do you want Adam Driver mad at you?  My point is that these characters are not your run-of-the-mill horror movie victims.

And yet, one-by-one, they’re taken out by the scarecrows.  We get a bit of backstory about the scarecrows when the mercenaries stumble across a farmhouse and discover that it was owned by three Satanists who transferred their souls into the scarecrows.  But really, that’s not important.  What is important is that the scarecrows will emerge from the darkness and kill anyone who lets their guard down.  The scarecrows even talk to each other!  TALKING SCARECROWS!  AGCK!

Anyway, Scarecrows is an effective, quickly-paced, and atmospheric horror film, one that I really enjoyed when I watched it last October.  The scarecrows make for efficient and frightening monsters.  This is the film that proves that scarecrows are scarier than clowns.

Seriously, don’t mess with the scarecrow.