Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing T. and T., a Canadian show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on Tubi!
This week, T.S. goes up against his scariest opponent yet!
Episode 2.10 “Conspiracy”
(Dir by Robert Malenfant, originally aired on December 5th, 1988)
Two pre-teens, Paul (Michael Fantini) and Colby (Alan Fawcett), come across a million dollars hidden away in an apparently deserted warehouse. In slow motion, Paul throw the money into the air and declares that he and Colby are rich. Of course, Paul doesn’t stop to consider that the money is probably linked to something illegal and that it’s dangerous for him and his best friend to take it.
Soon, Paul and Colby are spending money all over the place. They buy new clothes. They buy new bicycles. Local store owner Bud (Charles Woods Gray) is concerned about the amount of money that Paul and Colby suddenly seem to have. He meets with his old friend, T.S. Turner, and asks Turner to talk to the boys.
Paul and Colby meet with Turner at Decker’s gym and Paul lies and says that the money came from his grandmother. He also says that he loaned Colby the money for Colby’s new bike. After the boys leave, Turner says that he knows that there is more to the story and that he’s going to investigate on his own. Turner invites Joe to investigate with him. It’s good to see that the show’s writers finally remembered that Turner and Amy basically adopted Joe at the start of the second season.
Turner is not the only one investigating. The counterfeiter who created the money wants to know who stole it. Birken (Martin Neufeld) may drive a car with a personalized license plate that reads “Rainbow” but he’s still a scary dude. He’s so dangerous that he doesn’t even wear a shirt half the time! No one is going to tell Birken what to do.
Eventually, Birken kidnaps Paul and ties him to a chair and threatens to suffocate him if he doesn’t help Birken get back his money. That leads to this rather disturbing sight:
The villains on T and T are usually fairly generic and forgettable but Birken is probably the scariest man in Canada. He’s certainly the first villain on this show to be just as intimidating at Mr. T. As soon as Birken shows up, the viewer has no doubt that he’s willing to kill anyone to get back his money. For once, the stakes on this show feels real.
Or, at least, they feel real until T.S. Turner shows up at Birken’s loft. (This is yet another episode where T.S. somehow manages to sneak into a building without being noticed.) When he confronts Birken, Birken attemps to show off his karate moves but T.S. takes him down with one punch.
It’s a bit of an anti-climatic ending, which is a shame because this was actually, by the standards of T and T, a pretty good episode. Birken was both memorable eccentric and genuinely menacing. Still, he was no match for T.S. Turner. No one stops Mr. T.
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing T. and T., a Canadian show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on Tubi!
This week, T.S. insults the national sport of Canada and Amy battles city hall.
Episode 1.9 “On Ice”
(Dir by Alan Simmonds, originally aired on March 7th, 1988)
“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us, “Decker is forced to face the truth about a long-time friend.”
Though T and T took place in a generic city, the show itself was filmed in Canada, with a largely Canadian cast and crew. Hence, it only makes sense that the show would eventually do an episode that centered around hockey. This episode opens with Mr. T’s friend, Decker (David Nerman), coaching a junior hockey game. While the players skate on the ice and chase the puck, Decker deals with fans like the loud Mrs. Mowby (Jayne Eastwood), who is apparently convinced that she knows better how to coach the team than the actual coach! Unfortunately, Decker is yanked out of the game by two detectives who announce that he is under arrest for “theft of over $2,000.”
After T.S. Turner and Amy bails Decker out of jail, Amy explains that it appears that over $25,000 has been embezzled from the Junior Hockey Association. Decker admits to being the association’s treasurer but he also admits to not being good at numbers. He explains that his old friend, Goldie Stanski (played by Sean McCann), usually goes over the books for him.
“Goldie?” T.S. growls, “You trusted a guy named Goldie!?”
Decker explains that Goldie has been his friend for years. Goldie was his former coach! And, indeed, when Mrs. Mowby demands that Decker be kicked out of the Junior Hockey League, Goldie argues that Decker has not been convicted of anything, not that it does Decker much good. However, Detective Jones (Ken James) informs T.S. that “word on the street” is that Goldie has a gambling addiction.
Decker takes T.S. to his next practice and introduces T.S. to the team. They ask T.S. if he’s going to join them on the ice.
“No thanks, brothers,” T.S. replies, “I don’t play no sport when you can get frostbitten indoors. Besides, I think hockey’s an old ladies’ game …. Look at the ton of equipment you guys wear!”
After practice, Decker is arrested for a second time after the detectives, having gotten an anonymous tip, search his locker and just happen to find a bus ticket that leads to a bag full of money. Fortunately, Amy is able to bail him out of jail again, much to the relief of her spacey administrative assistant, Sophie (Catherine Disher), who has a crush on Decker.
T.S. has decided that Goldie is setting up Decker. Now, he just has to get Goldie to give himself away.
“I think with a little persuasion,” T.S. tells Amy, “he might do something foolish …. Friendly persuasion, of course!”
T.S.’s style of persuasion is to show up in Goldie’s apartment and tell him that everyone knows what Goldie’s done while drinking a glass of milk. “Thanks for the milk,” T.S. growls before leaving. When Goldie responds by going to the gym and pocketing more money from the hockey’s charity fund, Amy, T.S., and Decker are there to chase him out on the ice and catch him. If you’ve ever wanted to see Mr. T drive a Zamboni, this is the episode for you.
Decker’s name is cleared and he’s re-instated as coach. Yay!
This was a totally predictable episode but I kind of liked it. Mr. T on a Zamboni was just a ludicrous enough image to make the entire show work.
Episode 1.10 “The Latest Development”
(Dir by George Mihalka, aired on March 14th, 1988)
“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us, “Amy and I fight City Hall …. and City Hall fights back!”
When a dumb, 13 year-old kid named Nick (Toby Proctor) breaks into a construction site and takes a bulldozer for a joyride, he accidentally destroys a truck. The owner of the site, Enzo Malec (George Touliatos), is determined to throw the book at Nick because he’s an evil developer and he wants both Nick and his grandmother, Cora (Helen Hughes), out of their home.
It turns out that one of Amy’s former classmates, Brian Brack (Richard Comar), works in the city’s legal department so she heads down to City Hall in an attempt to guilt him into allowing Cora to stay in her home. For once, we actually get to see Amy doing legal work, which basically amounts to wandering around with a file folder and rolling her eyes while having conversations with other people.
Meanwhile, T.S. takes Nick down to the construction site and convinces Malec to let Nick work off his debt as a construction worker. T.S. arranges for Cora to move in with gospel-singing Aunt Martha (Jackie Richardson) while Nick moves in with Decker.
Suddenly, building inspectors show up at Amy’s office and start searching for violations. “Brian Brack is responsible for this, isn’t he!?” Amy says, while the inspectors write her up for not having a window that opens quickly enough. That’s a $2,000 fine! Upon discovering that they are now going to war with city hall, T.S. tells Amy, “This could be a title bout!”
Amy confronts Brian at a fancy restaurant and tells him that she has discovered that he has invested in Enzo Malec’s development. She demands to know who he and Malec paid off at city hall. Brian tells Amy that she doesn’t know who she is missing with. Amy responds by tossing a drink on him. In a case of amazing timing, Alderman Kent (Mark Walker) shows up and asks if Amy is going to be joining him and Brian for lunch. Hmmm …. I wonder who the corrupt politician could be.
Meanwhile, T.S. and Decker help Nick deal with his anger by training him to box.
“I know how to fight!” Nick says.
“To win, you need a strategy,” T.S. replies.
T.S. proceeds to knock down a 13 year-old.
While T.S. is teaching Nick how to fight, the city is threatening to shut down Aunt Jackie’s foster home! When T.S. finds out, he puts on his dark jacket and starts to head off to City Hall so he can presumably beat up the mayor. Instead, Amy convinces him to hold off by revealing that Brian and Alderman Kent have been taking bribes from Enzo Malec. When T.S. heads down to the construction site, Malec panics and, later that night, he tries to burn a bunch of incriminating files. However, it turns out that he’s being filmed by Amy and the local news.
And that apparently fixes the whole thing!
This episode felt rushed as it basically only had 30 minutes to deal with an hour’s worth of complications. It only took one boxing lesson for Nick to let go of his anger and it only took one confrontation with T.S for Enzo Malec to make one sloppy mistake. That said, I appreciate any episode that portrays municipal government as being thoroughly corrupt and irredeemable. Fight the system!
Through the Shattered Lens 