Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Malibu CA, which aired in Syndication in 1998 and 1999. The entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!
This week, Jason and Scott do something stupid!
Episode 1.25 “The Yacht”
(Dir by Gary Shimokawa, originally aired on May 16th, 1999)
Because they’re dumbasses, Scott and Jason accidentally destroy their father’s new watch. At first, they try to do the right thing and buy him a new watch. But it turns out that watch cost $2,000!
How can they possibly raise $2,000?
Hey, here’s an idea! Maybe they can just borrow Murray’s yacht and throw a casino night! (Actually, the yacht belongs to Murray’s father but whatever.) Surely, that’ll be enough to raise $2,000!
Uhmm …. hey, guys? Let’s think about this logically. It’s a casino night. Now, admittedly, you’ve got the yacht for free because it belongs to Murray’s Dad. Still, you have to rent (or buy) all of the slot machines, roulette wheels, and poker tables that are necessary for a casino night. You have to pay the dealers at each table. You probably have to pay security to keep an eye on all the money that’s floating around. You have to pay for all the refreshments. If you have the money to put on a casino night then guess what? YOU’VE GOT THE MONEY TO REPLACE YOUR DAD’S WATCH!
Good Lord, this show is stupid!
Anyway, Murray shows up at casino night wearing a white captain’s uniform and for once, I agreed with the audiences applause. Murray looked good! Brandon Brooks has been this season’s saving grace and he was the best thing about this episode. Unfortunately, Murray panics when he hears that his father is coming home early. He tries to steer the yacht back to the docks and instead, he accidentally hits a reef. The $2,000,000 yacht sinks!
We have spent this entire season hearing about what a monster Murray’s Dad is. This is the first episode in which he actually appears and he turns out to actually be a pretty cool guy. Yes, he’s upset that his yacht sank. And yes, Murray’s in some trouble. But Murray’s dad says he’s still proud of Murray for taking responsibility. Awww, what a great guy!
And what a stupid episode!
Actually, speaking of stupid, check out the B-plot. Stads wants to star in a film about lifeguard training. Since Traycee’s an actress, she agrees to teach Stads how to perform on camera. Stads accepts Traycee’s help but doesn’t ever really seem to appreciate it. As you can probably guess, Traycee ends up with the role and Stads gets even more upset. At this point, I’m a little bit bored with episodes that center around Stads getting upset about stuff. Stads is always upset about something. Even when something good happens to her, Stads gets upset about it. Stads started out as an interesting character but, halfway through the season, the show’s writers decided to just make her into a permanent killjoy.
Speaking of killing joy, this season is nearly over! Next week, season one comes to a close.






The Soldier is really only remembered for one scene. The Soldier (Ken Wahl) is being chased, on skis, across the Austrian Alps by two KGB agents, who are also on skis. The Soldier is in Austria to track down a KGB agent named Dracha (Klaus Kinski, who only has a few minutes of screen time and who is rumored to have turned down a role in Raiders of the Lost Ark so he could appear in this movie). The Russians want the Soldier dead because they’re evil commies. While being chased, the Soldier goes over a ski slope and, while in the air, executes a perfect 360° turn while firing a machine gun at the men behind him. It’s pretty fucking cool.