Julie Kimmel | Through the Shattered Lens

In 2019’s A Karate Christmas Miracle, young Jesse Genesis (Mario Del Vecchio) believes that if he can become a black belt in four days, his father — who has been missing for a year — will return home. Jesse’s mother, Abby (Mila Milosevic) tries to get Jesse to understand that his father was abducted and probably murdered by a killer clown. Eventually, trying to understand what happened to her husband, Abby teams up with Elizabeth (Julie McCullough), a quirky law professor who is also psychic.

This is a strange film. Eric Roberts and Martin Kove are listed as co-starring in the film but actually, all of their footage appears to have been lifted from 2015’s Joker’s Poltergeist, a film that stylistically and thematically has next to nothing in common with A Karate Christmas Miracle. Scenes of Jesse practicing karate and trying to work his way up to black belt in just six days are mixed with scenes of Eric Roberts threatening to kill people and Martin Kove rambling about he wants to leave a movie theater to his daughter. The scenes just don’t mix but they do show that if Eric Roberts and Martin Kove aren’t available to do your bad movie, you can just lift scenes of them from an even worse movie.

Sitting through A Karate Christmas Miracle is a bit of a struggle. It’s only 81 minutes long but every scene still goes on for too long and the dialogue is full of overly quirky moments that probably sounded great in the writer’s head but which play out very awkwardly on film. This movie really made me appreciate films that are actually edited in a professional manner. We tend to take good editing for granted. This movie reminds us not to.

Now, to be honest, the story did have some potential. A child is so desperate for his father to return that he sets an impossible goal for himself. Seriously, in the right hands, this could have been a real tearjerker. But everything about A Karate Christmas Miracle just feels off. The film works itself towards an heartfelt ending that it really hasn’t earned.

Perhaps the best thing that can be said about this film is that it’s still better than Joker’s Poltergeist.

Previous Eric Roberts Films That We Have Reviewed: