Star Slammer (1986, directed by Fred Olen Ray)


On the planet of Arous, Taura (Sandy Brooke) leads a group of dwarf miners in rebellion against the international empire.  The empire sends Captain Bantor (Ross Hagen), Krago (Michael D. Sonye), and the Inquisitor (Aldo Ray) to capture Taura and put down the revolution.  When Bantor attempts to attack Taura, he sticks his hand in a volcanic acid plume and screams as it dissolves.  Taura is arrested.  Judge John Carradine sentences her to a term on Vehemence, a spaceship that serves as an intergalactic women’s prison.

Star Slammer is a Women In Prison film that happens to be set in space.  Taura makes an enemy of the sadistic warden (Marya Grant) and her henchwoman, Muffin (Dawn Wildsmith).  Taura also befriend Mike (Susan Stokey) and the two of them plot to overthrow the guards and make their escape.  When the now crazed Bantor boards the ship, Taura sees her chance.  Meanwhile, the prisoners have to deal not only with pervy guards but mutant rats.

Legend has it that Fred Olen Ray had rented Roger Corman’s New World Pictures studio for four days so that he could shoot some extra scenes for his film Biohazard.  Ray finished his Biohazard work in one day and then spent the other three days filming promotional footage for the film that would become Star Slammer.  He used props that were left over from Galaxy of Terror and was able to get Aldo Ray to come in for a day so that the footage would feature “a name.”  Producer Jack H. Harris looked at the footage and put up the money to shoot the rest of the film on the condition that Ray change the title from Prison Ship to Star Slammer.

Amazingly, the resulting film itself is not that bad.  Ray used the outer space setting as a way to both indulge in and poke fun at the common tropes of the Women In Prison genre and Sandy Brooke and Susan Stokey both turn in committed performances.  Ross Hagen laughs like a maniac and demands vengeance for his missing hand while trying to get his remaining hand on a mind control device.  The prisoners are kept in check by promises of prizes and free trips in return for good behavior.  A thoroughly deformed guard is promoted as a sex symbol and there’s a sharp wit to many of the scenes.  Star Slammer is much more clever and fun than anyone would have any right to expect it to be.

Horror Scenes That I Love: “They’re dead …. they’re all messed up” From Night of the Living Dead


I’ve always loved the interview with the chief of police in the original Night of the Living Dead.  I love the delivery of that classic line.  “….they’re all messed up.”  Yes, they are.  The chief doesn’t seem to be particularly perturbed by the fact that the dead are coming back to life.  Instead, his attitude is very straight-forward.  To quote Tommy Lee Jones in Rolling Thunder, “Let’s go clean ’em up.”

When we first see this interview, it’s easy to laugh at the sight of the chief’s posse and everyone’s odd confidence that the dead will somehow just go away.  (Death, after all, is the one thing that is guaranteed to happen to everyone eventually.)  Once you know how the story’s going to end, though, this scene becomes much more ominous.

Horror Film Review: Evils of the Night (dir by Mardi Rustam)


How dumb can one movie be without becoming unwatchable?

1985’s Evils of the Night is here to answer that question!

Three space alien vampires (John Carradine, Julie Newmar, and Tina Louise) have led an expedition to Earth.  They’ve taken over a hospital and they’re stealing the blood of their patients so that it can be sent back to their dying planet.  They especially want young blood, which is why they specifically came to a college town.  Unfortunately, their intelligence was faulty and they arrived during the summer, when the campus was closed.  (I guess this is one of those rare colleges that don’t offer a summer term.)  There’s actually a very lengthy scene in which Carradine explains the faulty intelligence to Newmar and Louise and then Newmar complains about how the alien intelligence service just isn’t that good.  What makes this scene so special is that Carradine delivers his lines with a straight face and Newmar actually seems to be sincerely annoyed.  Aliens — they’re just like us!

Just because college is out of session, that doesn’t mean that there aren’t any young people hanging out down at the lake.  There’s actually quite a few, though all of them look to be a little bit too old for high school or college or whatever they’re supposed to be attending.  Several of them are played by veterans of the adult film industry, including Amber Lynn and Jerry Butler.  Everyone wants to get laid down at the lake, which is probably the most realistic thing about Evils of the Night.  However, John Carradine needs their blood so he has Julie Newmar hire two slovenly mechanics, Kurt (Neville Brand) and Fred (Aldo Ray), and sends them out to kidnap any young people that they find.  Kurt and Fred are very good at their job.  Newman pays them and mocks them for caring so much about coins.  Little do the mechanics realize that the aliens are planning on shooting them with their space laser as soon as they leave the planet.

Evils of the Night is a good example of a bad movie that is oddly watchable just because the viewer finds themselves curious as to just how stupid things can get.  The answer here is very stupid and very nonsensical  It never seems to occur to anyone just go to a different lake or maybe just do their skinny dipping in a pool somewhere.  The plot has a “make it up as you along” feel to it and that, at the very least, keeps things vaguely interesting.  The actors playing the “teen” victims are enthusiastic without being particularly good while most of the veterans in the cast are all obviously just there for the paycheck.

That said, John Carradine.  Wow.  What a career.  A trained Shakespearean actor who made his stage debut in 1925 and went on to appear in a countless number of movie, Carradine was a favorite of both John Ford and Fred Olen Ray.  Carradine appeared in hundreds of a theatrical films.  In fact, his final film was released seven years after Carradine’s death.  Carradine was one of the great actors, with that deep voice and that commanding stare.  But he was also one of those actors who was apparently willing to appear in just about anything and that’s one reason why he’s still such a beloved icon.  Playing an outer space vampire-turned-doctor was definitely not the strangest role that Carradine ever played.  Carradine handles his scenes like a pro!

Evils of the Night is dumb but I dare you to look away.

October True Crime: The Onion Field (dir by Harold Becker)


This 1979 true crime drama opens in Los Angeles in 1963.

Rookie Detective Karl Hettinger (John Savage) has just joined the Felony Squad and met his new partner, Ian Campbell (Ted Danson, making his film debut).  Ian is a tall, somewhat eccentric detective, the type who practices playing the bagpipes in the basement and who takes Hettinger under his wing.

Meanwhile, Jimmy Smith (Franklyn Seales) has just been released from prison.  The nervous and easily-led Jimmy almost immediately runs into Gregory Powell (James Woods), a small-time hood with delusions of grandeur.  Powell is the type who talks a big game but who really isn’t even that good of a thief.  Smith and Powell form an uneasy criminal partnership.  They are easily annoyed with each other but they also share an instant bond.  Though the film doesn’t actually come out and say what most viewers will be thinking, there’s a lot of subtext to a brief scene where Powell appears to caress Smith’s shoulder.

One night, Hettinger and Campbell are kidnapped by Smith and Powell.  Smith and Powell drive them out to an onion field.  Because he’s misinterpreted the Federal Kidnapping Act and incorrectly believes that he and Smith are already eligible for the death penalty because they kidnapped two police officers, Powell shoots and kills Campbell.  (The close-up image of Campbell falling dead is a disturbing one, not the least because he’s played by the instantly likable Ted Danson.)  Hettinger runs and manages to escape.  He saves his life but he’s now haunted by the feeling that he abandoned his partner.

The rest of the film deals with the years that follow that one terrible moment in the onion field.  Treated as a pariah by his fellow cops, Hettinger sinks into alcoholism and eventually becomes a compulsive shoplifter.  Smith and Powell, meanwhile, use a variety of tricks to continually escape the death penalty and to keep their case moving through the California justice system.  Powell, for instance, defends himself and then later complains that he had incompetent counsel.  Smith, meanwhile, is defended by the infamous Irving Karanek, a legendary California attorney who specialized in filing nuisances motions.  (Later Karanek found a measure of fame as Charles Manson’s attorney.  Eventually, he had a nervous breakdown in 1989, lived in his car, and was briefly suspended by practicing law.)  While Smith and especially Powell quickly adjust to being imprisoned, Hettinger spends the next decade trapped in a mental prison of guilty and bitterness.

Based on a non-fiction book by Joseph Wambaugh, The Onion Field is a compelling look at a true crime case that continue to resonate today.  The film can be a bit heavy-handed in its comparisons between the two partnerships that define the story.  Both Hettinger and Smith are young and neurotic men who find themselves working with a more confident mentor.  The difference is that Hettinger’s mentor is the cool, composed, and compassionate Ian Campbell while Smith’s sad fate is to be forever linked to the erratic Gregory Powell.  While the film may have the flat look of something that was made for television, it’s elevated by the performances of its lead actors.  James Woods give an especially strong performance as the cocky Powell, a loser in the streets who becomes a winner behind bars.  Over the course of the film, he goes from being a joke to being the prisoner that others come to for legal advice.  John Savage, meanwhile, poignantly captures Hettinger’s descent as the trauma from that night leaves him as shell of the man that he once was.

The film’s supporting cast is full of familiar faces.  Christopher Lloyd and William Sanderson show up as prisoners.  Ronny Cox plays the detective in charge of the onion field investigation.  David Huffman plays a district attorney who is pushed to his breaking point by the obstructive tactics of Smith’s attorney.  Priscilla Pointer play Ian Campbell’s haunted mother.  All of them do their part to bring this sad story to life.

The Onion Field is a chillingly effective true crime drama and a look at a murder that was inspired by one man’s inability to understand federal law.

Horror Song of The Day: Cat People (Putting Out Fire) by Giorgio Moroder and David Bowie


Today’s horror song comes the hypnotic soundtrack of Paul Schrader’s Cat People.  This song was so good that it later showed up and was used to equally strong effect in Quentin Tarantino’s Inglourious Basterds.

4 Shots From Horror History: 1930s Part One


This October, I’m going to be doing something a little bit different with my contribution to 4 Shots From 4 Films.  I’m going to be taking a little chronological tour of the history of horror cinema, moving from decade to decade.

Today, we take a look at the start of the 1930s.

4 Shots From 4 Films

Dracula (1931, dir by Tod Browning)

Dracula (1931, dir by Tod Browning)

Frankenstein (1931, dir by James Whale)

Frankenstein (1931, dir by James Whale)

Vampyr (1932, dir Carl Theodor Dryer)

Vampyr (1932, dir Carl Theodor Dryer)

White Zombie (1932, dir by Victor Halperin)

White Zombie (1932, dir by Victor Halperin)

Horror Book Review: X-Isle By Peter Lerangis


X-Isle!?

Is this a book about an island that is populated by the twenty or so people who actually refer to twitter by it’s “new” name of X?

No, actually, it’s not.  X-Isle was published in 2002, in the days before social media and ever-present phones.  X-Isle is a slasher story, one in which a group of good-looking teens end up hanging out at the exclusive Spinnaker Lodge, a luxury resort on an isolated island.  It’s like that island that Kim Kardashian took all of her friends and employees to during the COVID epidemic?  Remember that?  Everyone else was locked inside or wandering around triple-masked while Kim went to an island and then scolded everyone else for not taking proper precautions.

(Sorry to get off topic there but seriously, the COVID era was messed up in ways that people are still struggling to full comprehend.)

Reading X-Isle, I found myself wandering if you really could write an effective, non-ironic, old school slasher story nowadays.  The whole key to the slasher genre is that people have to be isolated and there has to be no way of reaching out for help.  Every slasher movie now has to come up with some extended to reason to explain why no one can call the police.  Whenever a horror movie starts with someone saying, “Give me your phone, you’ll get it back after the weekend,” I roll my eyes a little just because it’s become such a cliche.  At this point, I imagine even Camp Crystal Lake has free wi-fi.  It’s easy to imagine a camp counselor tweeting out, “Help!  There’s a murderer at Crystal Lake!” and someone replying, “Whatever, Jussie.”

X-Isle gets off to a good start with a collection inner-office dossiers that introduce us to the main characters.  What the memo reveals is that the main requirement to work at the resort is a handsome face or a good body.  Once the story kicks in, we meet our group of potential victims and, unfortunately, none of them really live up to all the hype in the introduction.  We spend a good deal of time with Carter, a womanizer who, at one point, feels the need to tell us that he’s not psychotic despite the fact that his behavior is often manipulative and narcissistic.  When you actually have to tell people that you’re not a psycho, you probably are. Of course, in this book, Carter is one of the heroes.

Someone is killing guests and employees.  It’s a YA book so we don’t actually see the kills but the aftermath is described in properly grisly fashion.  The reveal of who the killer was doesn’t make much sense but, given that the book ends with a cliffhanger, that was perhaps deliberate.

Anyway, I’ve always kind of enjoyed the slasher genre, even with all of its cliches and its issues towards anyone who shows the slightest spark of independence.  X-Isle was a fast and entertaining read.  None of the characters were particularly likable which made it a lot less stressful to read about them being put in danger.  In the end, the main lesson is to stay away from mysterious islands.  That’s probably good advice.

Horror Film Review: Voodoo Man (dir by William Beaudine)


In 1944’s Voodoo Man, Michael Ames stars as Ralph, a screenwriter who has been asked to write a treatment based on the real case of several “girl motorists” who have disappeared in the surrounding area.  Ralph turns down the assignment because he’s busy planning his wedding to Betty (Wanda McKay).  However, when Betty’s maid of honor, Stella (Louise Currie), vanishes, Ralph and Betty set out to investigate.  As Ralph puts it, he’s become a part of the story that he earlier rejected.

What has happened to Stella and all of the other women?  They’ve been abducted by Toby (John Carradine) and Grego (Pat McKee), two lunkheads who work for Dr. Marlowe (Bela Lugosi).  Dr. Marlowe lives in an isolated mansion where he is cared for by his loyal housekeeper (Mici Goty).  Twenty-two years ago, Dr. Marlowe’s wife, Evelyn (Ellen Hall), died but Marlowe has been able to keep her body in a sort of suspended animation ever since.  Marlowe is kidnapping women because, through the use of voodoo and mad science, he hopes to take their “will to live” and transfers it into Evelyn.  Helping Marlowe out is a voodoo priest named Nicholas (George Zucco).

Lugosi, Carradine, and Zucco!  Obviously, the main appeal of Voodoo Man is that it brings together three great names in horror. Even if the story doesn’t really make much sense (and it doesn’t), the film gets a lot of mileage out of the combination of Lugosi, Carradine, and Zucco.  While Lugosi does seem to be a bit bored with his role, Carradine and Zucco really throw themselves into their characters.  John Carradine, in particular, seems to be having the time of his life as he shuffles around the mansion and replies, “Yes, master,” to every command from Dr. Marlowe.  It’s the type of entertaining performance that could only be delivered by a trained Shakespearean slumming in a low-budget, B-grade horror film.  As for Zucco, he plays Nicholas with a certain amount of ruthless erudition.  Zucco is playing the Boris Karloff role here and he definitely seems to understand what that means.

As for the film itself, it has its moments.  Legend has it that director William Beaudine’s nickname was “One Shot” because he was usually only willing to do one take of each scene.  As a result, he filmed quickly and he didn’t spend a lot of money and that was probably a good thing for a production like Voodoo Man.  It also meant that if someone flubbed a line or bumped into a piece of furniture, that take would still be the one that showed up in the film.  My favorite moment of Voodoo Man was when the local sheriff (Henry Hall) referred to Dr. Marlowe as being “Dr. Martin,” and Bela Lugosi, who appeared to be struggling not to laugh, quickly said, “It’s Marlowe.”  The sheriff corrected himself.  That’s the type of fun you don’t get in movies made by people who do more than one take.

Voodoo Man has a quick 61-minute running time.  To enjoy it, it probably helps to already be a fan of low-budget, B-horror films from the 40s.  Lugosi, Carradine, and Zucco are combination that deserves to be seen.

Monday Live Tweet Alert: Join Us For Satan’s School For Girls!


As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in hosting a few weekly live tweets on twitter and occasionally Mastodon.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of Mastodon’s #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We snark our way through it.

Tonight, for #MondayActionMovie, the film will be 1973’s Satan’s School For Girls! I picked it so you know it’ll be good.

It should make for a night of fun viewing and I invite all of you to join in.  If you want to join the live tweets, just hop onto Mastodon, find the movie on YouTube, hit play at 8 pm et, and use the #MondayActionMovie hashtag!  The  watch party community is a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.   

See you soon!

Horror On The Lens: Baffled! (dir by Philip Leacock)


This is a film that I share every year for Horrorthon and can you blame me?  Check out this pitch: Leonard Nimoy is a race car driver who can see into the future and who uses his powers to solve crimes!

Seriously, if that’s not enough to get you to watch the 1973 made-for-TV movie Baffled!, then I don’t know what is.  In the film, Nimoy takes a break from racing so that he and a parapsychologist (played by Susan Hampshire) can solve the mystery of the visions that Nimoy is having of a woman in a mansion.  This movie was meant to serve as a pilot and I guess if the series had been picked up, Nimoy would have had weekly visions.  Of course, the movie didn’t lead to a series but Baffled! is still fun in a 70s television sort of way.  Thanks to use of what I like to call “slo mo of doom,” a few of Nimoy’s visions are creepy and the whole thing ends with the promise of future adventures that were sadly never to be.  And it’s a shame because I’ve always wondered what was going on with that couple at the airport!

Enjoy Baffled!  Can you solve the mystery before Leonard?