Hinton Pope | Through the Shattered Lens

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983. The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!

This week, two sets of thieves cause trouble!

Episode 4.10 “Forty Tons Of Trouble”

(Dir by Gordon Hessler, originally aired on January 11th, 1981)

A group of criminals is stealing equipment from construction sites and selling it on the black market. An attempt to steal a loader leads to it rolling down a Los Angeles street until Baker is able to jump onto it and crash it into a (hopefully) abandoned building. Getraer points out that Baker just destroyed a building. Baker shrugs and says he’s always wanted to do that.

A different group of criminals is stealing parts for their drag racer. The CHiPs have their own car entered into the drag races. Of course, it’s driven by Ponch.

After two accidents on the highway and several chases, Baker and Ponch (but mostly Ponch) capture the bad guys. Paula Kohl (Mary Louise Weller), the owner of Kohl Construction, appreciates the efforts of Baker and Ponch (but mostly Ponch).

In other words, this was a typical episode of CHiPs. Still, it’s memorable because of the supporting cast. Amongst the construction site thieves is Robert Englund. Englund thinks that Sarge (Taylor Lacher) is taking to many risks when it comes to trying to steal loaders and bulldozers but Sarge is like, “I got it under control.” Meanwhile, amongst the drag race thieves, is Chris Mulkey. Mulkey doesn’t get to do much but he does get two scenes where he smirks at Ponch. Sadly, both characters end up getting arrested during this episode but have no fear. Robert Englund went on to play Freddy Krueger. Chris Mulkey went on to play the sleazy but strangely likable Hank Jennings on Twin Peaks.

As for the rest of the episode — hey, I don’t ask for much from CHiPs. As long as there’s a good crash scene and a lot of cool cars, I’m happy. This episode delivered. One could ask why Ponch is always the one who gets to do the cool things, like driving in the race and taking Paula out on a fancy date. Earlier seasons usually tried to portray Ponch and Baker as being equals. This season, though, has clearly been The Ponch Show. It’s a legitimate criticism but …. eh. Sometimes, you just want to watch a chase or two.

This week, Ponch attacks a reporter …. or does he?

Episode 2.4 “Disaster Squad”

(Dir by Gordon Hessler, originally aired on October 7th, 1978)

In a change-of-pace for this show, it’s Officer Jon Baker who gets a girlfriend in this week’s episode. Ellen Roberts (Liberty Godshall) is a recently divorced woman with an annoying 4 year-old named Chris (Christian Zika). Because Baker doesn’t want any kids around to ruin his action, he gets Ponch to hang out with Chris. Fortunately, it turns out that Chris loves motorcycle and even owns his own mini-bike.

Impressed by how well Chris can handle his bike, Ponch enters Chris in a children’s dirt bike race. When one of the other racers knocks Chris down in the middle of the race, an angry Chris says that he’s going to hit the other racer. Ponch tells Chris to never hit anyone and he says that he’s ashamed to hear Chris speak like that. Chris promises not to ever fight.

But then, the next morning, Chris turns on the TV and sees a report about Ponch punching out an obnoxious news reporter (Harvey Jason) who got in the way while Ponch and Jon were dealing with a suicidal motorist. The anchorman (played by Regis Philbin!) then comes on TV and basically says that Ponch is the epitome of everything bad about the police. Chris starts sobbing. Ponch lied about not fighting! Chris hops on his mini-bike and, still crying, drives away.

What Chris doesn’t know is that Ponch was set up. Lee and the members of “the Disaster Squad” have been following Ponch and Baker around, filming accidents, and getting in the way. (At one point, one of Lee’s men event tosses a road flair under a car that’s leaking oil, causing an explosion.) Lee doctored the tape of an earlier confrontation with Ponch to make it appear the Ponch threatened and hit him.

But that doesn’t matter to Chris. With tears flowing down his cheeks, he drives his little motorcycle into the Los Angeles river. Fortunately, Ponch and Baker find him in time to save his life and teach him an important lesson about fake news.

This episode …. where to begin? It opened with a good chase scene and it featured a truck flipping over so that was good. But then bratty little Chris showed up and the whole episode went downhill. The child playing Chris was, to be charitable, not exactly the world’s best actor and his over-the-top reaction to seeing Ponch hit someone was bit too silly to inspire anything other than a chuckle. “Ponch said never to hit anyone!” Chris wails. Well, kid, Ponch is a damn hypocrite. Sorry.

It was all pretty silly. Baker finally got to do something other than gaze at Ponch in amazement but, in the end, the story was still pretty much Ponch-centered. One thing I noticed about this episode is that Getraer had absolutely no sympathy for Ponch, even though he believed Ponch was being set up. Seriously, I get that Getraer has a lot to deal with but does he have to be a jerk all the time?

Next week …. Ponch and Baker continue to keep California safe!