Retro Television Reviews: Hang Time 2.3 “Harvest Moon” and 2.4 “The Sure Thing”

Posted on October 31, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing Hang Time, which ran on NBC from 1995 to 2000. The entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!

Season 2 continues with the search for victory on the court and love off of it!

Episode 2.3 “Harvest Moon”

(Directed by Patrick Maloney, originally aired on September 21st, 1996)

It’s time for the Harvest Moon dance, which I guess is an Indiana thing. Danny is all excited because Sam is going to be coming home from college so that she can attend the dance with him. But then Sam sends Danny a letter, telling him that she’s fallen in love with an anthropology student and that they are heading down to Mexico! Danny gets whiny, which is kind of annoying to watch. Honestly, why would you want to date someone in high school when you’re in college?

Anyway, Danny gets a rebound date with girl named Veronica. Veronica has red hair, just like Sam. Amy even mistakes Veronica for Sam, despite the fact that Amy wasn’t even on the show last season. Everyone talks about how much Veronica looks like Sam while Veronica is standing right there. It’s kind of rude.

Meanwhile, Teddy DJ’s the dance while Julie and Josh find excuses to abandon their dates and dance with each other. Vince and Mary Beth also end up poking fun at each other’s dates and then they end up soulfully staring at each other when Teddy announces the last dance, which leads me to worry that Vince and Mary Beth are going to become a couple. Don’t do it, Mary Beth! You deserve better!

Danny steals the team bus and tries to drive it to Chicago. For some reason, Julie and Josh go with him. They talk him out of driving to Chicago and then they kiss while Danny drive them back to Indiana. So, Danny is heart-broken but at least Julie and Josh are happy.

Finally, during the dance, another real-life basketball player drops by to visit with Coach Fuller. I have no idea who the guy was but the audience went crazy as soon as he showed up. Fuller, however, kicked him out of the gym for scuffing the floor.

Josh and Julie seems like they’ll be a cute couple and I guess I should accept that the Mary Beth/Vince thing is going to happen because opposites attract. Danny is now single and kind of whiny so hopefully, that will only last episode or two. As far as school dance episodes go, this one could have really used either the Zack Attack or the California Dreams.

Episode 2.4 “The Sure Thing”

(Directed by Patrick Maloney, originally aired on September 28th, 1996)

The Tornadoes have lost six straight games so Fuller demands that the members of his team carry basketballs around with them everywhere that they go. If that doesn’t work, I guess the season’s over and Fuller’s out of a job.

Teddy is more concerned about asking out Tracy, the new cheerleader. However, as Teddy explains to his new friends, he’s never asked a girl out before because he’s always been “the fat kid who is everybody’s friend” and you know what? Anthony Anderson totally sells it! “You don’t know what it’s like to ask someone out and have them laugh and then you have to laugh too!” Anderson says at one point and my heart was totally breaking for him. Seriously, watching this episode, you fully understand why Anderson went on to have the busiest career of the many actors who appeared on this show.

Vince and Danny decide to help Teddy out by stalking Tracy and discovering everything that she’s interested so that Teddy will feel confident talking to her. Couldn’t Teddy just mention that, as was established during the first episode of the second season, his father is an NBA superstar and probably has a lot money? That’d be a good icebreaker.

Meanwhile, Josh and Julie are dating but Josh is tired of the cutesy way Julie talks to him. I don’t blame him as, up until this point, there’s been absolutely nothing about Julie’s personality that suggests she would talk to her boyfriend in baby talk. Eventually, Julie reveals that she’s only been talking that way because she thought Josh liked it and she actually hates doing it as much as Josh hates hearing it.

During this week’s game, the Tornadoes are losing but Teddy finally asks out Tracy and gets the confidence he needs to lead the team to a comeback victory. Yay! It was kind of sweet.

Retro Television Review: Hang Time 2.1 “Winning Isn’t Everything” and 2.2 “Just One Of The Guys”

Posted on October 24, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Season 2 of Hang Time! Because NBC wasn’t happy with the first season, the 2nd season served as a bit of a reboot for the season. Half the cast left and the show became a bit more broad in its comedy. That’s a polite way of saying that things got a little bit more cartoonish.

The show also got a brand new theme song!

Episode 2.1 “Winning Isn’t Everything”

(Directed by Patrick Maloney, originally aired on September 7th, 1996)

The first episode of the 2nd season starts in the school hallway. “They’re coming!” one kid yells before leading all of his classmates in a chant of “Tornadoes! Tornadoes!”

Yes, the students at Deering High love their basketball team. But where is everyone? We see Julie, Danny, and Mary Beth walking down the hallway. Where’s Chris? Where’s Earl? Where are Michael Maxell and Sam!? Danny orders the students to chase down the one kid wasn’t cheering and then, as if he can hear our thoughts, he says, “I’m really going to miss Earl, Michael, and Chris.”

It turns out that things have changed! Julie broke up with Chris over the summer and then he went off to college. Earl is also at college. And so is Sam. All those people were seniors last year? Why were they so worried about dating a bunch of underclassmen? Mary Beth mentions that she’s no longer a cheerleader and now she’s equipment manager because her Dad thinks it will teach her responsibility. Amy (Paige Peterson) is the new head cheerleader. Everyone acts as if Amy was around last year even though she wasn’t in any of the episodes.

At practice, we meet the new players. Vince D’Amata (Michael Sullivan) is cocky and determined to be a star. Everyone makes fun of Vince for being short but he’s still taller than Danny so I’m not really sure that joke is as effective as the rest of the team thinks it is. Fuller announces that the team has gotten lazy so it’s a good thing that his godson, Teddy Brodis, has transferred to the school. Fuller used to play with Teddy’s father so Teddy is “probably great.” On cue, Teddy enters the gym and …. OH MY GOD, IT’S ANTHONY ANDERSON! Proving that everyone had to start somewhere, future Departed, Law & Order, and Black-Ish star Anthony Anderson did a two season tour as a part of the Hang Time cast. Anderson was in his mid-20s at the time, making him considerably older than the rest of the cast. Coach Fuller is upset to see that Teddy is not particularly tall and a little heavy-set. Hey, Coach, that’s a future Emmy winner you’re talking to! (And, even though he doesn’t got to do much in his first few episodes, it is obvious from the start that Anderson instinctively knew how to play to the camera.)

“Could we possibly be off to a rockier start?” Fuller says and in comes Mary Beth with a box of new uniforms, all of which are the wrong color. Mary Beth explains that they may be wrong but at least they’re “pretty.”

Anyway, the team is looking weak. Can the team recruit Josh Sanders (Kevin Bell) to play for them!? Josh is athletic but he refuses to play team sports because he doesn’t like the competitive aspect of the game. We know that Josh is good and cute because the audience goes, “Woooooo!” whenever he shows up onscreen. The team tries to recruit him by showing him that they don’t believe that winning is everything. Honestly, though, if Josh isn’t into competing, why would you want him on your team? Team sports are about winning!

Josh agrees to try out for the team but then walks out of a practice because of the team arguing with each other. But then he comes to a game and see Fuller bench Vince because Vince wasn’t playing as a part of the team. Josh immediately joins the Tornadoes. I’m getting the feeling that Josh might have issues with impulse control.

Finally, Mary Beth accidentally washes all of the autographs off of one of Fuller’s basketball. Fuller nearly fires her but then Mary Beth brings in some tall guy to re-sign the ball. Judging by the way the audience went crazy and the fact that the guy was like 7’3, I’m going to guess he was a basketball player.

Episode 2.2 “Just One Of The Guys”

(Directed by Patrick Maloney, originally aired on September 14th, 1996)

Julie doesn’t understand why Josh doesn’t seem to be attracted to her. Mary Beth and Amy tells her that she should try to be more feminine. Later, during practice, Julie gets upset when Vince gives her a high five and says, “Way to go, man!” “I’m a girl,” Julie replies. Josh, her crush, says, “Don’t take it personally, you’re just like one of the guys.”

OH MY GOD! If I was Julie, I would move to a different state at this point.

Anyway, Mary Beth and Amy give Julie a makeover, which basically amounts to Julie wearing high heels, not wearing a bra, and tossing her hair back while talking to Josh.

However, Josh just wants to talk about basketball practice.

Pictures alone cannot communicate how awkward this scene was.

After spending all of last season determined to prove that she can play with the guys, Julie quits the team in order to prove that she’s not one of the guys. Mary Beth is shocked. “When I’m upset,” Mary Beth says, “I don’t get a new life. I get new shoes!” “Shoes aren’t a substitute,” Julie says and the only person more horrified by that statement than Mary Beth is me. Mary Beth suggests that Julie try a new look. “How about Janet Jackson?” Mary Beth says. Uhmmm …. this is going somewhere dangerous….

Fortunately, Fuller is friends with an Olympic gold medalist, who just happens to drop by the office and gives Julie a pep talk. Julie rejoins the team and decides to be confident in herself. Is there nothing that an Olympic gold medalist can’t do?

In the B-plot, Vince, Teddy, and Danny make fun of the cheerleaders so the cheerleaders stop talking to them. So, Vince, Teddy, and Danny dress up as cheerleaders.

Anyway, the important thing about this episode is that Daniella Deutscher had more chemistry with Kevin Bell than she with David Hanson and, as such, the Julie/Josh relationship is a lot more entertaining than the Julie/Chris relationship. Here’s hoping everything works out for them!

Retro Television Review: Hang Time 1.13 “Game Day”

Posted on October 17, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

It’s time for championship so let’s get to it!

Episode 1.13 “Game Day”

(Directed by Howard Murray, originally aired on December 2nd, 1995)

The final episode of Hang Time‘s first season opens not with the team practicing or Coach Fuller coaching. Instead, it opens with the Deering High gym dark and deserted, with the exception of Samantha. Samantha sits in the bleachers, writing in her diary. As I watched this scene, it occurred to me that, after 12 episodes, we know next to nothing about Sam beyond the fact that she works at the Sports Shack, she’s the equipment manager, and she’s dating Danny. Does she have a family? Does she have parents who wonder why she’s hanging out at the gym in the middle of the night? Why can’t she write in her journal at home? I get the feeling that Sam’s home life must have been some sort of Dickensian nightmare.

Anyway, this episode revolves around Sam remembering the days leading up the championship game and the game itself. She writes that she had never seen Coach Fuller “so pumped,” which means that we get a flashback of Fuller talking to the team in the locker room and yes, he does seem pretty excited. Fuller tells the team that “I know the Huskies are undefeated …. but I know we’re going to win tonight because we’re a family!”

(Here’s my thing, though. The Huskies are undefeated but the Tornadoes are not. So why is the championship being played at Deering High instead of wherever it is that the Huskies are from?)

Fuller leaves the locker room and everyone starts fighting! Oh no! There’s trouble in basketball world! Michael thinks he’s jinxed! Danny and Sam are arguing! Chris and Julie aren’t even talking!

“But I’m getting ahead of myself,” Sam writes, “This all started Monday morning.”

And so, we go even further into the flashback machine. Julie gives Chris a massage outside the school but gets upset when Chris accidentally calls her “Mary Beth.” “It just slipped out!” Chris replies, something that he probably says to Julie a lot. Julie gets upset.

Meanwhile, while having a picnic in the gym (again, with the gym), Sam tells Danny that she loves him. Danny panics and replies, “I like you a lot.” AGCK! Bad move, Danny. It’s bad enough that Sam is apparently not allowed to leave the gym. She’s also got a coward for a boyfriend.

At practice, Coach Fuller tells everyone that they have to play as a team. Fuller says that Chris’s playing has sucked over the past few weeks. What could Chris be doing differently than before? Let’s see. When Chris was playing well, he was dating Mary Beth. Now, he’s dating …. uh oh. Mary Beth overhears and mentions that she used to always kiss Chris before every game. Now, of course, Chris is dating Julie and Julie apparently doesn’t believe in showing affection so it sucks to be Chris.

At lunch, Julie tells Sam that she grew up with four brothers and they can play “every Led Zeppelin song through use of their armpits.” I don’t know if I believe that. Some of those songs are pretty long. Stairway to Heaven is like a 50-minute song if I remember correctly. Julie is worried Chris isn’t over Mary Beth. Sam says that she has nothing to worry about and then writes, “Sometimes, you have to lie through your teeth.”

Danny tries to apologize to Sam, explaining the he thinks people are too quick to use the “L-word.” Sam says she understands but then Danny casually mentions that he “loves” tuna fish. Meanwhile, Earl freaks out because Michael walks under a ladder. Everyone’s getting a storyline in this episode!

Chris also gives into his superstition, sharing a kiss with Mary Beth before the game. Actually, he shares several. He’s so busy kissing her that he doesn’t notice Julie coming out of the locker room until the last minute! Uh-oh.

The game begins with everyone angry at each other. Myself, I’m more concerned that the other team is being played by people who obviously were basketball players and, as a result, they tower over the Deering Tornadoes.

(Incidentally, I spell Tornadoes with an E. Judging by the banners hanging in the Deering High gym, this show does not. However, I’m the one writing the review.)

Before the game begins, Julie tells Chris that she’s not going to be a runner-up to anyone. (But seriously, Mary Beth is so cool that if you were going to be runner up to someone….) Julie then kisses Earl to show that she can have any guy she wants. Earl does the chef’s kiss motion while Chris stares on horrified.

Despite their problems, the Deering High Tornadoes still take the lead. However, Coach Fuller is angry because the score is still too close in his opinion. Hey, Coach, they’re winning! A win is a win. Fuller does praise Chris for playing a great game. We all know who deserves the credit for that. Mary Beth better get the game ball.

In a subplot that is so stupid that I’ve been tying to avoid mentioning it, Michael has been trying to play the game without stepping on any cracks on the gym floor. (He doesn’t want to break his mother’s back. I told you it was stupid.) Fuller yanks him out of the game and sends in a previously unseen player as a replacement. The new player’s name is Bryan Kuta, which feels like such a random name that I’m assuming that was either the actor’s real name or the name of someone on the show’s crew. Later, when Fuller tries to send Michael back into the game, Michael refuses because there’s only 13 seconds left in the quarter. I would make fun of Michael but, to be honest, I refuse to use odd numbers. If you’ve ever wondered why I always use four periods for an ellipsis instead of the standard three …. well, now you know. Anyway, Fuller gives Michael a piece of tape and tells him to use it as a good luck charm.

Danny gets knocked to the ground. Samantha runs out on court to make sure that he’s okay. Michael interrupts the game by grabbing a microphone and announcing, “Samantha Morgan, I love you.” Awwwwwww! Yes, it’s cringey but Sam and Danny are a cute couple so it works.

With only 30 seconds left in the game, Coach Fuller pulls Chris and Julie off the court and replaces them with the second-string players. Of course, the Tornados are up by ten. Let’s see if Fuller would be so nice if it was a one point game! Chris tells Julie that all of the luck came from Julie and not Mary Beth. Personally, I think we all know that Mary Beth deserves all the credit.

The Tornadoes win the championship 84-75. “Well, congratulations,” Fuller tells the players, “You’re the champs.” That wasn’t much of a speech but …. Yay, I guess.

And so, the first season comes to an end. Chris and Julie are a couple! Danny and Sam are in love! Michael is going to be a star! Earl already is a star! I can’t wait to see what happens to all of them next season….

Oh, alright. I’ll tell you what happens next season. Chris, Sam, Michael, and Earl are written out of the show and all of tonight’s storylines are forgotten about. Join us next week for …. THE NEW HANG TIME!

Retro Television Reviews: Hang Time 1.11 “The Bachelor Pad” and 1.12 “Poetic Justice”

Posted on October 10, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

We are reaching the conclusion of the first season of Hang Time and it’s time for us to ask where we’re all going with this show. What will be the ultimate conclusion of Deering’s season? Let’s get in the mood to find out with the Hang Time theme song!

Get out on that court and put it in the basket!

Episode 1.11 “The Bachelor Pad”

(Directed by Howard Murray, originally aired on November 18th, 1995)

“Great game, everyone!” Coach Fuller announces at the start of this episode, letting us know that Deering is finally having a good season. I wonder if they’ll make it to the state championship? (Of course, they will! A show would never be made about a merely adequate team. That seems a bit unfair, though. Most high school teams are merely adequate and surely, they deserve some representation as well!)

There’s trouble in paradise! Danny’s parents are out of town and, for some reason, this leads to Danny staying at Coach Fuller’s penthouse for three days. A student staying with his teacher and coach for the weekend? I remember when this happened on Degrassi. The end result was the coach getting fired and the student being traumatized for life. Seriously, Danny staying with Fuller seems massively inappropriate but I guess the 90s were a different time. Meanwhile, Sam is worried that no one takes her seriously because she’s just the equipment manager.

Anyway, you can guess what happens, can’t you? Coach Fuller goes out for the evening. Danny does the Risky Business dance in Fuller’s penthouse and then everyone from school shows up. The wild party leads to Fuller’s $3,000 chair getting damaged. The next day, during the game, Fuller learns about the party and the damage to his chair and he chases Danny out onto the court. Fuller is kicked out of the game and Sam has to take over. Sam coaches the team to victory and the team apologizes to the coach. Yay!

Oh — and due to winning that game, the team is going to the league championship! Take that, merely adequate teams!

As for the episode itself, this is another one of those episodes that drives me crazy because every problem that the characters run into is due to their own stupidity. Still, it was nice that Hillary Tuck finally got a chance to shine. The team owes their victory to a redhead. Yay, Sam!

Episode 1.12 “Poetic Justice”

(Directed by Howard Murray, originally aired on November 25th, 1995)

“Chris and I are a couple!” Julie announces at the end of this episode.

“A couple of what?” Mary Beth responds and I’ll admit right now that I laughed. Megan Parlen’s delivery was perfect on that line.

Mary Beth has reason to be upset because, just before Julie made her announcement, she was telling Chris that she wanted to get back together with him. Mary Beth may have thought that she was over Chris but Earl encouraged her to write a poem about her feelings and that led to Mary Beth realizing that she was still in love with her ex.

Earl’s a poet now? Yep.

Julie is finally ready to public with her relationship with Chris? Yep.

The championship is coming up with all of this drama going on? Yep.

Yes, it’s all kind of silly but it was worth it for that one line. “A couple of what?” It made me laugh and that really is kind of the point of the show.

Next week, it’s championship time!

Retro Television Reviews: Hang Time 1.9 “Stranded” and 1.10 “The Sweat Shack”

Posted on October 3, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

I’ll always remember, me and my friends at Hang Time!

It’s time to check in and see what’s happening at Deering High!

Episode 1.9 “Stranded”

(Directed by Howard Murray, originally aired on November 4th, 1995)

“Great!” Sam announces halfway through this episode, “we’re all stuck together and we hate each other!”

And yes, it is true. After a terrible loss, Coach Fuller makes the team come in for a Saturday morning practice. Only a few members of the team make it due to the fact that it’s snowing and those who do make it end up getting trapped in the gym by the blizzard! Way to go, Coach!

This actually wasn’t a bad episode. For one thing, memories of the 2021 Texas blizzard are still fresh on my mind so, for once, I could relate to what the characters on the show were going through. I actually have been snowed in, with the power going on-and-off. Fortunately, I wasn’t trapped in a gym. I was in my house, with a book to read.

The majority of the episode was taken up with a group therapy session, in which Fuller tried to get the team to open up about both the loss and their feelings to each other. And while I initially groaned when the scene started, it was actually handled fairly well. We got to hear each character’s inner thoughts and it turned out that most of them were just as tired of Julie being the center of every storyline as the viewers undoubtedly were. Add to that, a new member of the cast made an appearance when one brave boom mic made an appearance, hovering over the group.

While everyone tried to figure out how to survive being stuck in the gym overnight (did none of these high school students have parents trying to dig them out?), Julie and Chris debated whether they could both date and be teammates and Mary Beth, who was in the gym despite not being a member of the basketball team, tried to take care of the fake baby that she had been assigned for a class assignment.

As I said, this was not a bad episode. Chris and Julie were still an amazingly boring couple but, with this episode, it felt as if the cast had finally come together as an ensemble. Still, it’s strange that the episode ended with Michael saving everyone in the high school as opposed to say the parents who were undoubtedly wondering to where their children had disappeared during the worst blizzard in Indiana history. Did the adults in town just not care about their high school basketball team?

Episode 1.10 “The Sweat Shack”

(Directed by Howard Murray, originally aired on November 11th, 1995)

This was a weird episode. Mary Beth’s father demanded that she get a job so, somehow, she ended up as manager of the Sports Shack (which is the store in the mall where most of the characters work). At first, Mary Beth is too lenient of a boss. Then she become too strict of a boss. All of her employee go on a strike but is there really a Sports Shack union? Is the strike even legal? Couldn’t everyone be arrested for disturbing the peace and, even more importantly, why can’t Mary Beth just fire all of them and hire cheap replacements? That would definitely cut down on payroll.

Meanwhile, Coach Fuller is in charge of a new exchange programs where members of the basketball team pair up with girls from Russia and …. wait, WHAT!? Earl gets a Russian who loves hanging out with him. Michael gets a Russian who is overweight so, of course, the audience goes, “Whoa!” “You are fresh prince,” the Russian tells Michael, on account of the fact that Michael appears to be the only black student at Deering High. “Hah hah hah!” the audience responds. Eventually, Michael learns an important lesson about not judging Russian mail order brides by their weight. It’s all more than a little cringey but it is kind of sweet that Earl’s exchange student even follows him around while he’s working his security job at the mall.

Anyway, this one of those episode that kind of felt as if it was just a mix of scenes and storylines that had been cut from other episodes. Perhaps it would have been better if everyone had been trapped at the mall by another blizzard. Seriously, blizzards bring out the best of this show.

Retro Television Review: Hang Time 1.7 “Let’s Get Ready To Rumble” and 1.8 “The Candidate”

Posted on September 26, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

The season continues!

I hate to say it but this terrible theme song is starting to get stuck in my head. Takin’ my shot …. something something something …. Hang Time …. flying like glockmock …. running with big screen tee ayyy …. Hang Time …. okay, those may not by the exact lyrics but that’s what it sounds like to me.

Episode 1.7 “Let’s Get Ready To Rumble”

(Directed by Howard Murray, originally aired on October 21st, 1995)

Just in case the viewer needed a reminder that this show is from the mid-90s, this episode opens with Sam lustfully comparing her boyfriend, Danny, to Mel Gibson. Needless to say, Danny looks nothing like Mel Gibson but, at the same time, it also seems like he’s a bit more emotionally stable so I guess it all works out in the end.

This episode was all about relationships. Mary Beth’s frustration with Chris’s refusal to act like a rich snob led to her being tempted by her childhood friend Charles Landingham (Trey Alexander). Apparently, Charles used to be overweight but now he’s lost the weight and he wears a sweater over his shoulders and Mary Beth accepts a kiss from him. Unfortunately, Julie sees Mary Beth kissing Charles and she now has a dilemma. Should she tell Chris the truth or not? Considering that Mary Beth and Charles are an adorable couple, a true friend would be encouraging them to get together.

Meanwhile, all the boys head over to Coach Fuller’s house to watch a Mike Tyson fight. Unfortunately, this means that Danny has to break his regularly scheduled date with Sam. He claims to be sick and then heads over to Fuller’s house. However, Sam shows up at the house and it turns out that she’s a fight fan as well! She gets so into the Tyson fight that she forgets to slap Danny for lying to her in the first place.

Eventually, Mary Beth tells Chris the truth and they have the most peaceful break-up ever. They agree to be friends, which frees Chris up to date Julie. It’ll be a relationship based not only on basketball but also the sound of the audience applauding every time one of them gets the ball in the basket.

As I’ve said before, Mary Beth is the only character to whom I can relate on this show because she’s the only character who doesn’t spend all of her time talking about basketball and who shops whenever she gets upset. This was a good Mary Beth episode and it was the first to really give Megan Parlen a chance to show off her comedic skills. Still, it’s hard not to be disappointed at how predictably the Chris and Julie relationship is playing out. It seems obvious that Chris and Julie are going to be a fairly boring couple. What are they going to do after basketball season ends?

Episode 1.8 “The Candidate”

(Directed by Howard Murray, originally aired on October 28th, 1995)

Mary Beth is running for school president on a platform of doing away with the Future Farmer’s Club and replacing it with the Gold Card Girls Club. “Membership will be open to anyone, as long as you’re a girl, you have a gold card, and we all like you,” Mary Beth explains. Having been profoundly moved by reading The Grapes of Wrath for English class, Michael runs against Mary Beth on a platform of saving the Future Farmer’s Club. (Doesn’t this show take place in Indiana? Isn’t every student at the school a member of the Future Farmer’s Club by default?) Danny manages Mary Beth’s campaign. Sam manages Michael’s campaign. “I’m running on the issues,” Michael announces.

Oh, get over yourself. It’s a student council election. Saved By The Bell, California Dreams, and City Guys all featured the same stupid storyline. So did Boy Meets World, if I remember correctly. (“Hold on,” Topagna announced, “we still need to do something about the black mold in the cafeteria!” Isn’t that the job of the adults?) Eventually, after all of the usual nonsense that always happens in episodes about student council elections, Michael is elected but declines to accept the office because he’s ashamed of his campaign. Mary Beth becomes president but promises to be the type of president that “Tom Joad would be proud of.” Good luck with that. IT’S JUST THE FREAKING STUDENT COUNCIL, PEOPLE!

While the school picks a new president, Chris and Julie continue their painfully dull courtship and Coach Fuller looks for date to a wedding. Chris and Julie finally kissed at the end of the episode. “Woooo,” the audience dutifully responded but even they didn’t sound particularly excited about it.

Anyway, this episode is almost as dumb as suggesting that a high school student is going to be obsessed with John Steinbeck. To Hell with your grapes of wrath!

Retro Television Review: Hang Time 1.5 “Oh Captain, My Captain” and 1.6 “Earl Makes The Grade”

Posted on September 19, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

The season has finally begun. Julie won one game. Michael lost one game. Danny and Sam are now a couple. Will Deering High continue its winning/losing ways? Let’s find out!

Hang Time!

Episode 1.5 “Oh Captain, My Captain”

(Directed by Howard Murray, originally aired on September 30th, 1995)

In order to shake up the team and hopefully have a winning season, Coach Fuller decides to switch around everyone’s positions. I have to admit that, while watching this episode, I was forced to reflect on how little I actually know about basketball. For instance, I was stunned to discover that the players have specific positions. I honestly thought that everyone just ran around the court and tried to steal the ball.

Chris isn’t happy about having to switch positions because he thinks that it might make it more difficult for him to get a college scholarship. (Chris is like 5’7 so maybe it would be a good idea for him to at least consider other options.) Chris resigns as team captain. Coach Fuller appoints Danny as the new team captain. Teams have captains? I’m learning a lot from this show. Eventually, Chris learns to put the team first and Danny hands the captainship (or whatever it’s called) back over to him.

In the B-plot, Michael gets a job working at Earl’s farm. Chaos ensues but Michael learns an important lesson about how difficult farm work is.

This episode had one good joke, in which Mary Beth sent Coach Fuller a legal summons because her father gave her an attorney for her birthday and she figured she should make use of her presents.

Otherwise, this episode had a bit too much basketball for me, which is obviously kind of a silly complaint to make about a show that’s about basketball. I have to admit that this show doesn’t do much for my rebellious spirit. The main lesson was always to listen to the coach and put the team first. Bleh. BE A REBEL!

Episode 1.6 “Earl Makes The Grade”

(Directed by Howard Murray, originally aired on October 14th, 1995)

Deering High has a game coming up against their hated rivals, Valley High …. oh wait a minute. Sorry, Valley High was Bayside’s rival. Deering High is going up against Dover High. Earl, however, is flunking history. He has to pass his big midterm if he’s going to play. Unfortunately, a new girl is distracting Earl from studying. She’s making him stay up late and kissing him whenever he tries to study. It turns out that it’s all a plot to keep Earl from playing in the game, like that time Valley stole Screech’s lucky beret right before the big chess match. After Earl’s new girlfriend framed him for cheating on the test, Coach Fuller declared, “You let your team down, Earl.”

Good Lord, is it a team or is it a cult?

Anyway, everything works out due to the TNBC law of people always doing obviously stupid stuff. Immediately after Earl gets kicked off the team, Earl’s fake girlfriend started making out with a player on the other team in Deering High’s gym, right in the middle of the Deering/Dover game. Anyway, once it becomes clear that Earl was framed, he’s allowed to rejoin the team and Dover gets destroyed. Yay!

The B-plot dealt with a prank war between Julie and Danny. Remember the Bayside/Valley prank war?

My point is that this was pretty much a Saved By The Bell episode that got reused on Hang Time. That said, Robert Michael Ryan gave a pretty good performance as Earl and you actually did feel sorry for him when he discovered how cruelly he had been treated. Earl was just too innocent for this world.

Will Deering continue to win their games? Check back next week to find out!

Retro Television Review: Hang Time 1.3 “Full Court Press” and 1.4 “Will The Real Michael Maxwell Please Stand Up?”

Posted on September 12, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Finally! It’s time for the Deering Tornadoes to actually play a game! Will Julie and the rest of the team live up to the hype? And when will the show realize that they need a better theme song?

I’ll always remember me and my friends at Hang Time!

Episode 1.3 “Full Court Press”

(Directed by Howard Murray, originally aired on September 23rd, 1995)

The season is about to begin and the press are invading Deering High, all so they can report on Julie Connor, the first girl to ever play basketball in high school. (At least, that’s the way the story is reported.) The press is only interested in talking about Julie. All of the fans are only interested in getting Julie’s autograph. Julie has strangers walking up to her and telling her that she’s going to be a huge star. The rest of the team starts to get jealous. Coach Fuller is forced to close the practices to the public. “Connor, get the stars out of your eyes!” he says. He also reminds her to always mention her teammates while being interviewed.

Unfortunately, the fame starts to go to Julie’s head. “Big decision,” she says, “do I go on Leno or Letterman?” On the day of the first game, she’s late because she has to go to a photoshoot. Coach Fuller punishes her by putting her on the bench. “Ohhhhh!” the audience says.

Julie is forced to sit on the bench until the third quarter or half or whatever it is that they play in basketball. However, when the Tornadoes start to lose, Fuller puts Julie in the game. At first, the team still snubs her but then Julie calls a timeout and apologizes. Then the boys call another timeout to apologize to Julie. Then Danny calls a third timeout to apologize personally. Despite all of the timeouts, the team goes on to win by one point. That point was scored by Julie. So, apparently, Julie was totally correct about thinking that she was the most important player on the team.

Meanwhile, Mary Beth saved Earl from choking to death so Earl gives her a pig.

Episode 1.4 “Will The Real Michael Maxwell Please Stand Up”

(Directed by Howard Murray, originally aired on October 7th, 1995)

Deering High won their first game, by one point, thanks to Julie. However, they lose their second game, again by one point, thanks to Michael Maxwell. Michael misses not one but two free throws! He then makes the mistake of saying, “I choked” while in the presence of reporters. The next day, guess what the headline on the front page of the newspaper is!

Anyway, Michael loses his confidence but then he’s given a pep talk by his idol, Grant Hill, who I guess was a real basketball player at the time.

Meanwhile, Danny is still trying to work up the courage to ask out Julie. Samantha tries to help him out, mostly because Samantha likes him. At first, Danny is too stupid to understand this but, by the end of the episode, he and Samantha are a seriously cute couple.

My thoughts on these two episodes is that I don’t know a thing about basketball and the first season was all about basketball. As a result, the first season was uneven (for me, at least) but the show would eventually develop its own weird charm. At this point, I’m just waiting for the theme song to change and for the Tornadoes to actually win or lose a game by more than one point.

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 9/4/22 — 9/10/22

Posted on September 10, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Here are just a few thoughts on what I watched as I continued to spend this week preparing for the greatest month of the year, October!

The Bachelorette (Monday Night, ABC)

Poor Gabby! What a mess. She went from being the bachelorette that ever man wanted to date to the bachelorette who now only has one man left to compete for her, a man to whom she’s not even sure she is ready to become engaged. Meanwhile, Rachel has got three men to choose from and it’s hard not to feel that it’s going to be a disaster no matter who she picks. Gabby and Rachel were picked for this season largely because of how badly they were treated during the previous season of The Bachelor but, if they were hoping for a better experience this time around….

If Meatball were still on the show, he could marry both Gabby and Rachel and all of these problems would be solved.

Big Brother (All The Time, CBS and Paramount Plus)

I’ve been writing about Big Brother over at the Big Brother Blog. The season is winding down. That’s a good thing because I’m actually starting to get really bored with the show. All of the really interesting players have been voted out of the House. I’m predicting we’re going to end up with a Turner/Brittany final two and Big Brother Twitter is going to erupt in outrage.

The Challenge (Wednesday Night, CBS)

Enzo is doing a lot better on The Challenge than he did either time he played Big Brother. If you come for Enzo, you better not miss.

Fantasy Island (Tubi)

I watched a few episodes this week and I wrote and scheduled a review for each one of them. The Island is lovely.

Full House (Sunday Evening, MeTV)

DJ volunteered at an assisted living facility and decided that it would be a good idea to bring one of the residents home with her. Personally, I would think that this would lead to DJ losing her volunteer gig but everything worked out in the end. Being a Tanner apparently provided you with a magic shield that protected you from the consequences of your actions. This was followed by an episode in which Stephanie decided that it was time to get serious about her dancing. I could barely watch, it was so cringey.

Hang Time (YouTube)

I watched 16 episodes of Hang Time this week. Somehow, I survived. Look for the reviews in the weeks to come.

Inspector Lewis (YouTube)

Hathaway took a holiday to Croatia, where he helped paint an orphanage. It was very much a Hathaway thing to do. With Hathaway gone, Lewis was free to finally pursue a relationship with Dr. Hobson. Yay!

Mike Judge’s Beavis and Butt-Head (Paramount Plus)

How exactly are Old Beavis and Butt-Head still alive? That’s what I found myself wondering as I watched the latest episode of Mike Judge’s Beavis and Butt-Head. Old Beavis destroyed both of his original kidneys and then destroyed his new kidney because he didn’t like the person who donated it to him. That’s certainly his choice to make but seriously, how is he going to recover from something like that?

Then again, how are Young Beavis and Butt-Head going to recover from drinking acidic pesticide? I can’t lie, I worry about the boys. They need someone to step in and say, “No, don’t drink that!” But I don’t blame Mr. Anderson giving them the pesticide because he was just trying to help. If anything, Mr. Anderson is perhaps my favorite character on the show because I’ve got someone just like Mr. Anderson living at the end of the block. He means well.

Night Shift (Night Shift Plus)

On Friday night, I watched an episode about the “second British invasion” of the early 80s. The episode featured music videos from Duran Duran, The Human League, and few other bands of the era. The Human League video was for Fascination, which made me happy.

Retro Television Review: Hang Time 1.1 “The Pilot” and 1.2 “Trouble in Paradise”

Posted on September 5, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Hang Time! I’ll always remember my friends at Hang Time!

Imagine California Dreams if it took place in Indiana and if, instead of music, everyone was obsessed with basketball. That’s Hang Time!

Produced by Peter Engel, Hang Time followed the adventures of the Deering High School basketball team. Somewhat notoriously, the cast regularly changed from season to season, with only two members of the cast sticking with the show for every season. The first season featured:

David Hanson as Chris Atwater, the star of Deering High’s basketball team,

Daniella Deutscher as Julie Connor, the newest member of the team,

Chad Gabriel as Danny Mellon, the quirky member of the team who had a crush on Julie,

Megan Parlen as Mary Beth Pepperton, the materialistic head cheerleader who was dating Chris,

Robert Michael Ryan as Earl Hatfield, the dumb country boy who loved basketball and worked as a mall security guard,

Christian Belanvis as Michael Maxwell, who had a lot of talent and an ego to match,

Hillary Tuck as Samantha Morton, the hyper organized team manager,

and

Reggie Theus as Bill Fuller, a former pro player who returned to his old high school to coach the team.

Season one of Hang Time also had an absolutely horrid theme song, one that was luckily abandoned after the season ended.

Episode 1.1 “The Pilot”

(Directed by Howard Murray, Originally aired on September 9th, 1995)

Oh my God, this was bad….

I mean, pilots are usually bad because the characters aren’t as nuanced as they will later be and the initial storyline usually tries to hard to establish everyone’s role in the show’s hierarchy. Veteran retro television viewers know better than to expect anything good from an episode with the dreaded title of “The Pilot.”

That said, the pilot of Hang Time was really, really bad. The show itself was never exactly good but it did eventually develop an oft-kilter charm. But none of that charm is present in the first episode of the show.

Julie Connor (Daniella Deutscher) transfers to Deering High and tries out for the school’s basketball team. A girl playing basketball!? GASP! Anyway, Julie turns out to be a slightly above average basketball player and wins a place on the team and …. well, that’s about it. It would probably seem like more of an accomplishment if it appeared that there was any real competition when it came to getting on the team. Instead, only a handful of people seem to be interested in playing basketball and at least a few of them seem to be …. well, kind of short.

I understand that Reggie Theus was a former basketball player-turned-actor. Judging from this pilot, as an actor, he was a very good athlete.

Episode 1.2 “Trouble in Paradise”

(Directed by Howard Murray, Originally aired on September 16th, 1995)

“You should be home, baking a Cake!” a drunk basketball fan yells at Julie when she and Chris attend a pro basketball game. Julie challenges the jerk to a game. Chris tries to maintain calm. Unfortunately, it gets both Julie and Chris on TV, which leads to Mary Beth and Danny getting jealous.

Bleh. This was a dumb episode. Mary Beth, who doesn’t care about basketball, was the only character to whom I could relate.

The first two episodes of Hang Time felt like California Dreams, without the music. Hang Time would eventually develop a style of its own, with Megan Parlen especially proving herself to be a capable comedic actress. But that style really isn’t present in much of the first season.

Next week: The Deering Tornadoes finally play a game!