Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 6.10 “Operation Breakout/Candy Kisses”

Posted on April 1, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984. Unfortunately, the show has been removed from most streaming sites. Fortunately, I’ve got nearly every episode on my DVR.

And now, it’s time for …. wait? What? *sigh* Okay.

Episode 6.10 “Operation Breakout/Candy Kisses”

(Dir by George W. Brooks, originally aired on January 15th, 1983)

My fantasy would be to be able to review this episode.

Ever since Fantasy Island was yanked down on all the streaming sites, I’ve been watching the show off of my DVR. A few years ago, I recorded nearly every episode off of one of the retro stations. (Sadly, the station also appears to no longer be broadcasting the show.) Unfortunately, nearly is not all and this is one of the episodes that I did not record. So, obviously, I can’t review it.

I can talk a little bit about it because I did watch this episode a few years ago. When I read the plot description on the imdb — Wheelchair-bound Kentucky racehorse breeder Rowena Haversham wants one last chance to win a race; and self-professed failure Danny Clements of Boston wants to turn his life around by breaking an American agent out of a tough foreign prison. — a bit of it came back to me. I remembered that Rowena (Ann Turkel) was given what she thought was a magic riding crop but that, at the end of the episode, Roarke revealed that the only magic was Rowena’s belief in herself. I think Rowena was transformed into a younger version of herself and she befriended a young rider played by Jill Whelan and ended up falling in love with Whelan’s father, who played by John Beck and not Gavin MacLeod. And I remember that Ben Murphy played the guy who entered the prison to save the American spy but it turned out that the prison was run totally by women and the spy was having the time of his life. I remember bits and pieces but it’s been a few years and I still wouldn’t feel comfortable even trying to tell you whether or not the episode worked.

So, consider this to be a placeholder. If I ever find Fantasy Island streaming somewhere or if someone is kind enough to reupload the show to YouTube, I’ll come back and review this episode.

Until then, my fantasy is for an official home video release of the entire series as opposed to just the first few seasons. Seriously, this is a fun show and one that still has a lot of fans. Yanking it off of Tubi to make room for the Fox reboot that only lasted for two seasons really doesn’t make a bit of sense.

This needs to be fixed!

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 5.17 “Funny Man/Tattoo, The Matchmaker”

Posted on November 12, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Smiles, everyone! Smiles!

Episode 5.17 “Funny Man/Tattoo, The Matchmaker”

(Dir by George W. Brooks, originally aired on February 20th, 1982)

For the second week in a row, Julie only appears in the stock footage at the start of the episode. And again, for the second week in a row, no mention is made of her. Mr. Roarke doesn’t say anything about why she’s not greeting the guests at the docks. Tattoo doesn’t seem to care.

This is actually a big episode for Tattoo. It turns out that Tattoo has a side hustle going. He’s running a computer dating service! (This isn’t surprising. During the early seasons of the show, Tattoo always had some sort of extra money-making scheme going on.) He’s invited both Harriet Wilson (Laurie Walters) and Claudette Mills (Misty Rowe) to the Island so that they can be set up with the perfect future husband. Usually, Roarke isn’t happy when Tattoo invites people to the Island on his own but this time, he doesn’t seem to be too upset about it. He tells Tattoo that the two women and their fantasies will be his responsibility. At one point, Roarke even mentions that Tattoo is in charge of overseeing all of the weddings that occur on Fantasy Island. Does that include Mr. Roarke’s wedding from a few seasons ago?

However, there’s a problem. Tattoo’s big computer has decided that both Harriet and Claudette should marry Mr. Roarke. Tattoo and his business partner, Ambrose Tuttle (Skip Stephenson), think that the computer must be malfunctioning but Tattoo did promise the women that he would set them up with the most charming man on the Island and what better description is there for Mr. Roarke?

Mr. Roarke is not particularly amused to discover that he is now expected to marry two women who he doesn’t even know. Considering the tragic ending of Mr. Roarke’s previous marriage, this isn’t a huge shock. Roarke tells Tattoo that he has to find other husbands for both Harriet and Claudia. Fortunately, Amrbose Tuttle is single and a former football player (Russ Francis) has also come to the Island. Can Tattoo pull it off and help all four of these people fall in love? To quote Mr. Roarke, “Indeed, he can.” This is Fantasy Island!

Along with learning about Tattoo’s computer dating operation, we also learn about Tattoo’s favorite comedian. Beau Gillette (Jimmy Dean) has built a successful career telling jokes about his redneck family. What he’s never told anyone, including his fiancée (Vicki Lawrence), is that his family is imaginary. Beau grew up in an orphanage and created his family in his head so he wouldn’t be lonely. Beau’s fantasy is for his family to exist, just so he can introduce them to his fiancée. Mr. Roarke suggests that it might be a better idea for Beau to just tell the truth but Beau’s like, “Nah, let’s just bring imaginary people to life.”

While Beau’s performing his act, Uncle Jack (Morgan Woodward), grandma (Jeanette Nolan), and cousin Lindy (Linda Thompson Jenner) all come to life. The only problem is that they all know that they’re really imaginary and they’re not happy that Beau’s been thinking less about them and more about his fiancée. They decide that Lindy should break up Beau’s engagement by seducing him. And if they doesn’t work, they can just kill Beau’s fiancée….

Wow, that got dark!

Actually, this isn’t a very dark fantasy at all. Both fantasies are played largely for laughs. Beau, realizing that his imaginary family has been a crutch that he’s been using for too long, confesses that they don’t really exist and, as a result, they all fade away. Beau’s free to get married and I guess come up with new act. Yay!

Much like last week, this episode felt like a throwback to the early seasons of Fantasy Island. Tattoo got a storyline and Mr. Roarke was heavily involved in the fantasies, as opposed to just being a bystander. Both Herve Villechaize and Ricardo Montalban appeared to be having fun in this episode and, as a result, it was fun to watch, even if it was hard to buy into the idea the Beau Gillette’s rather anodyne jokes about his redneck family would have made him into a star. Largely due to Tattoo and his computer dating service, this was an enjoyable trip to the Island.

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 4.23 “Man-Beast/Ole Island Opry”

Posted on April 30, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984. Almost the entire show is currently streaming on Daily Motion.

This week, we learn something new about the Island.

Episode 4.23 “Man-Beast/Ole Island Opry”

(Dir by George W. Brooks, originally aired on May 16th, 1981)

Did you know that Fantasy Island is home to a world-famous country music venue?

Yes, I’m talking about the Ole Island Opry! Operated by Lottie McFadden (Anne Francis), the Ole Island Opry is a mainstay of the Island, even though it’s never been mentioned before. Lottie says that everyone from Charley Pride to Hank Williams to Dolly Parton has played at the Ole Island Opry.

If you’re anything like me, you’re saying, “What the heck?”

I mean, seriously, why have we never heard of this place before? How many country music fans live on the Island? Why would established artists be so eager to play at a venue that’s sitting on an isolated island? And how big is this Island anyway? With the fishing village, the native villages, the downtown area that we see sometimes, the children’s side of the Island, the ancient castles, the isolated mansions, the Ole Island Opry, and all the magical portals, Fantasy Island has got to be at least the size of New Zealand.

These questions go unanswered, as usual. Instead, the episode focuses on Charlie Rowlands (Jimmy Dean), who was an up-and-coming country music star until his wife died and he gave up stardom to raise his daughter, Jennie (Wendy Schaal). Charlie is an old friend of Lottie’s and his fantasy is for Jennie to make her singing debut at the Ole Island Opry.

What Charlie doesn’t know is that Jennie has a fantasy of her own. She wants her father to stop pressuring her to become a singer so that she can focus on her love of photography! Mr. Roarke is able to grant both fantasies. Jennie sings but is really bad and her father finally realizes that she’s not meant to be a country-western star. Instead, Jennie asks her father to come up on stage and sing a song. Charlie sings King of the Road and, despite being a bit older than the usual up-and-comer, he gets a recording contract. He also wins the love of Lottie, who leaves the Island with him. As for Jennie, she can now attend a Yankee art school without feeling guilty. Yay!

Jimmy Dean gave a charming performance but otherwise, this fantasy was just silly. Perhaps it would have worked if Charlie and his daughter had stepped into the past and found themselves in Nashville in the 40s but having Jennie make her debut (and farewell) at the “Ole Island Opry” just required a bit too much of a suspension of disbelief. As well, Mr. Roarke has a habit of combining people’s fantasies without giving them any advance warning. It always seem to work out okay but I still think Mr. Roarke is lucky that he hasn’t gotten sued by a guest who didn’t want to share their fantasy with anyone else.

The other fantasy featured David (David Hedison) and Elizabeth Tabori (Carol Lynley) coming to the Island in an attempt to cure David of a recurring nightmare that he’s been having, one in which Elizabeth and he are in a dark cave and Elizabeth is terrified of something. Mr. Roarke quickly deduces that David is a werewolf. David can be cured by a very rare plant. Unfortunately, it will take the plant a few days to arrive so David will have to survive two full moons on Fantasy Island.

As with most of this show’s horror-themed fantasies, this fantasy was simple but fun. The werewolf makeup was pretty basic but David Hedison poured himself into the role of the tortured David Tabori. Fortunately, the magic flower arrives just in time to curse David of his ancestral curse.

As David and Elizabeth leave, Tattoo says that David must have been crazy because werewolves don’t exist. Suddenly, Tattoo realizes that he’s turning into a werewolf. Roarke has a good laugh as the end credits roll.

This week was another uneven trip to the Island. It’s interesting that, even with a werewolf on the loose, everyone still braved the night to attend the show at the Ole Island Opry. Fantasy Island is a strange place and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 4.21 “Basin Street/The Devil’s Triangle”

Posted on April 16, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984. Almost the entire show is currently streaming on Daily Motion.

This week is a bit uneven. Let’s dive into it!

Episode 4.21 “Basin Street/The Devil’s Triangle”

(Dir by George W. Brooks, originally aired on May 2nd, 1981)

Pilot Clay Garrett (Joe Namath — yes, the goofy football player) and cameraman Tom Spencer (Christopher Connelly) have come to Fantasy Island with Kerry Dawson (Trish Stewart). Kerry is the host of a show where she explores isolated locations of the world. Clay flies her where she’s going. Tom films her. Throughout the episode, it is suggested that — much like the characters at the center of Cannibal Holocaust — they’ve occasionally been guilty of staging the footage that has made them famous.

Kerry wants to search for the remains of an airplane that disappeared over 40 years ago. The plane was flown by the famed aviatrix Wilma Deitrich. Why they don’t just admit that Wilma is a stand-in for Amelia Earhart, I have no idea. Mr. Roarke warns Kerry that the fantasy could be dangerous but he does not stop Clay, Tom, and Kerry from boarding a plane and then flying out across the ocean.

The plane ends up in the Devil’s Triangle, which I guess is this show’s version of the Bermuda Triangle. The plane crashes on an uncharted island. Kerry gets bitten by a snake and Clay sucks out the poison before he and Tom set off to look for the remains of Wilma’s plane. Clay and Tom, incidentally, are both in love with Wilma. Will Wilma select the boring cameraman or the boring pilot who sucked snake venom out of her body?

It’s a question that would perhaps be more compelling if Kerry had the slightest bit of chemistry with either man. But she doesn’t. Joe Namath is as stiff here as he was in C.C. and Company. Christopher Connelly looks bored. Kerry does eventually pick Clay so hopefully, they’ll be happy together.

(And yes, they do get off the island. They find the wreckage of Wilma’s plane and use it to repair their own plane. Amazingly, Wilma’s plan is still full of operational parts despite having spent over 40 years sitting on a deserted island.)

As for the other fantasy, Charlie Raines (Cleavon Little) wants to go to turn of the century New Orleans and meet his hero, jazzman Camptown Dodd (Raymond St. Jacques). Roarke and Tattoo give him a magic clarinet and send him to New Orleans, where he immediately finds himself auditioning for Camptown. Camptown wants Charlie to not only join his band but also lead it after his death.

DEATH!?

Yes, death. Camptown refuses to sell Opium in his club and, as a result, he has been targeted for assassination by a corrupt police officer. Charlie is so upset about this that Roarke himself steps into the fantasy to let Charlie know that he can’t change the past.

Okay, so Charlie can’t save Camptown but surely, he can bring Billie Joe (Berlinda Tolbert) into the present with him, right? Afterall, Charlie has fallen in love with her. No, Roarke says, that’s not how it works.

Fear not, though! Once he’s in the present, Charlie discovers that Billie Joe was actually a guest at the Island and that Roarke combined two fantasies into one. Yay!

The jazz fantasy was predictable but it was still better than the other fantasy. Cleavon Little, Raymond St. Jacques, and Berlinda Tolbert all actually seemed to be invested in their characters, which made them a lot more fun to watch than the stiffs on the deserted island.

This week’s trip to the Island was a bit uneven. The jazz fantasy was occasionally entertaining. The other fantasy was forgettable. I don’t hold that against, Mr. Roarke. That’s just the way it goes sometimes.