Tag Archives: Chuck Shamata

DEATH WISH V: THE FACE OF DEATH – The end.

Posted on by Bradley Crain

Picture it…it’s 1992 or 1993 and I’m back at my local Hastings Entertainment superstore browsing through an entertainment magazine. Surprisingly, I came across a bit of entertainment news that a 71 year old Charles Bronson had accepted an offer of $5 million to reprise his Paul Kersey character for a fifth time. I couldn’t help but wonder what possible direction that they could take the series that would be interesting. I didn’t see anything else about the movie for the next year or so, and then it showed up some time in 1994 available for rent at that same Hastings Entertainment superstore. As far as I know, it never played in theaters in Arkansas, although it did play in some theaters in other parts of the country prior to going to home video. I immediately rented the film, somewhat apprehensive of what it would be….

DEATH WISH V: THE FACE OF DEATH, begins with Paul Kersey (Charles Bronson) back in New York. We first see him, looking quite dapper I might add, walking down the street in the garment district. He’s on his way to see his latest girlfriend, fashion designer Olivia Regent (Lesley Anne-Down), whose fashion show is currently underway. You immediately feel sorry for Ms. Regent as you know her prospects for survival are somewhere between slim and none since Kersey’s her man. It doesn’t help matters when her ex-husband, awkwardly impotent mobster Tommy O’Shea (Michael Parks) shows up and starts physically abusing her and her employees. You see, O’Shea is trying to force his ex-wife to use her fashion business to help him launder money from his various criminal activities. Kersey tries to convince Olivia to go to District Attorney Brian Hoyle (Saul Rubinek) to try to put O’Shea away. Unfortunately, there’s corruption in the D.A.’s office in the form of Hector Vasquez (Miguel Sandoval), who passes the information back to O’Shea. From this point forward, Ms. Regent’s life is in serious jeopardy and we all know Kersey’s record of keeping his women alive isn’t that great. I won’t give the details away, but let’s just say that events conspire so that the cursed Kersey will have to resume his old vigilante ways in pursuit of a justice that can never be provided to him by the law.  

I remember vividly my first ever viewing of DEATH WISH V back in 1994. I put the videotape in the VCR and watched several previews that looked crappy and didn’t give me a lot of hope for the movie. And then it started, and I have to admit I enjoyed it from the very beginning to the end. I guess my expectations were so low that it was a major relief when I realized that it was a reasonably well-made, audience satisfaction movie designed for people like me who simply enjoy seeing Bronson acting as an instrument of justice. I thought Bronson looked good for an action star over 70 years old. I really liked the movie’s sense of humor. Michael Parks overacted to the point of parody as O’Shea, and the character of Freddie Flakes (Robert Joy) was especially fun as a hitman with major dandruff problems. And there was something about Charles Bronson that was different in comparison to some of the earlier entries. Then I realized what it was, Bronson was having fun. He took out the bad guys with things like poisoned cannolis and exploding soccer balls, all with a twinkle in his eyes. In the 70’s, Bronson made several movies where his characters had that twinkle. It was nice to see it back. Bad things happened of course, but director Allan A. Goldstein kept a tone of black comedy that suited the movie and its aging star well. 

Even in 1994, watching DEATH WISH V felt like the end, not just of the DEATH WISH series, but of Bronson’s time as a movie star. As his biggest fan, that made me kind of sad. He would only make 3 more TV movies after this, those being the FAMILY OF COPS TV movies. And while there are some who don’t like DEATH WISH V and seem to go out of their way to put it down, I’m exactly the opposite. To me, DEATH WISH V: THE FACE OF DEATH is a gift to Charles Bronson fans and an enjoyable end to his signature series!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Check It Out 2.18 “My Girl Friday, Saturday, Sunday”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing the Canadian sitcom, Check it Out, which ran in syndication from 1985 to 1988.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

This week, Howard runs afoul the mob.  Don’t worry, it’s only the Canadian mob.

Episode 2.18 “My Girl Friday Saturday Sunday”

(Dir by Alan Erlich, originally aired on February 22nd, 1987)

While taking Edna to the airport (and seriously, how many vacations does Edna take during the year?), Howard is the victim of a hit-and-run.  Another car literally takes off Howard’s driver’s side door.  Howard is determined to find out who was driving the car and make them pay for his door.

After Marlene puts signs up around the airport asking if anyone witnessed the accident, Howard learns that the other car belonged to Canadian gangster Meatloaf Rothko (Chuck Shamata) and it was being driven by his mistress, Jerri (Heather Smith).  Of course, Meatloaf already knows whose car Jerri hit and, in fact, he’s arranged for Jerri to get a job as Edna’s temporary replacement at Cobb’s.

Meatloaf requests that Howard meet with him at an Italian restaurant.  Howard is hesitant but finally agrees to not only meet with him but to wear a wire.  But, it turns out that Meatloaf is actually a nice guy who is willing to give Howard $10,000 to keep quiet about the accident.  So, in other words, there really wasn’t much point to any of this.

As you probably already guessed, the plot of this episode was dumb.  As I’ve often commented in the past, Check It Out has never been able to figure out who Howard Bannister is supposed to be.  Sometimes, he’s the best boyfriend in the world and a respected father figure to all of his employees.  This week, however, his employees are back to having no respect for him and Howard starts to hit on Jerri as soon as she shows up in the store.  (Sorry, Edna, I hope going on your tenth vacation of the season was worth it.)  Sometimes, Howard is a brilliant guy who always tries to do the right thing.  This episode, he’s back to being a coward who has to be pressured into standing up for himself.  Considering that the episodes in which Howard is a good boss are a hundred times better than the ones where he’s a total jackass, it’s a bit annoying that the jackass version of Howard seems to be the one who shows up the most.

On the plus side, this episode featured a lot of funny bits from the show’s supporting cast.  Kathleen Laskey, Jeff Pustil, and Gordon Clapp all got in a few good one-liners.  Of course, it helps that Laskey, Pustil, and Clapp all play characters who behave in a consistent manner.  Jeff Pustil’s Jack Christian is always going to be smarmy in an oddly likable way.  Gordon Clapp’s Viker is always going to be earnestly dumb.  Kathleen Laskey’s Marlene is always going to be a sarcastic agent of chaos.  Their characters have been consistent since the show started and, as a result, a lot of the humor comes from knowing how they’re going to react to certain situations.  I will sit through an entire episode just to hear Marlene’s sarcastic response to whatever plan Christian comes up with.  They’re funny characters.

So, my feelings about this episode were mixed.  The story was incredibly dumb and Howard was incredibly annoying.  But the employees of Cobb’s made me smile more than once.  This episode wasn’t particularly memorable but it amused me.  I’ve learned that’s the best one can hope for with this show.

Retro Television Reviews: T and T 2.14 “The Contender”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing T. and T., a Canadian show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990.  The show can be found on Tubi!

This week, T.S Turner returns to the ring!

Episode 2.14 “The Contender”

(Dir by Alan Simmonds, originally aired on February 13th, 1989)

T.S. Turner meets Kevin Hart!

No, not that Kevin Hart.

Instead, the Kevin Hart in this show is a boxer and he’s played by an actor named Phillip Jarrett.  (Kevin Hart, I immediately, noticed was very handsome for someone who made his living getting punched in the face by professionals.  I checked with the imdb and I was not surprised to learn that Phillip Jarrett was a model before he went into acting.)  Kevin Hart is a contender for the championship but his trainer has vanished.  With the big fight coming up, Hart’s manager asks T.S. Turner to train him for the fight.

Kevin Hart turns out to be a boxer with an attitude.  He shows up at Decker’s Gym with his entourage and is miffed to discover that Turner is running late.  “What does T.S. stand for?” Hart demands to know, “Too Stupid?”

“Temporarily Sorry,” Turner says as he steps into the gym.

“Temporarily?”

“Yeah,” Turner growls, “I was sorry but now I’m not.”

Turner works hard to train Hart.  Or, at least, it appears that he works hard.  For the most part, we just see a montage of Hart doing physical stuff while Turner yells at him.  Despite Turner’s efforts, Hart doesn’t even seem to care about the fight.  He does care when someone takes a shot at him in the gym.  Pressured by Turner, Hart finally confesses that he agreed to take a dive.  He also says that all of his other fights were fixed as well.  That’s why his former trainer ran away.  He didn’t want to be involved with a boxer who was owned by the Canadian Mafia.

Turner doesn’t have any time for that attitude.  He tells Hart that he has the talent to win the fight on his own.  He also tells Hart that it’s time to fight like a man and win.  Inspired by Turner’s words, Hart does just that.  By the end of the show, Hart is the champ.  I imagine he’s got the mob after him now but oh well.  I mean, Sonny Liston reportedly upset the mob and he still managed to live a full and exciting life until his mysterious death at the age of 40.  So, I’m sure boxing’s Kevin Hart will be fine and maybe, some day, he’ll change his mind about hosting the Oscars.

The way to make watching this episode entertaining is to pretend that Mr. T was playing Clubber Lang and not T.S Turner.  Apparently, in an early draft of his script for Rocky Balboa, Sylvester Stallone wrote a scene in which it would be revealed the Lang changed his ways and became a preacher after losing his rematch with Rocky.  So, this episode of T and T — and really, the entire series — works best as Clubber Lang fan fiction.  As Rocky said at the end of Rocky IV, “Everybody can change!”

Late Night Retro Television Reviews: Check It Out 1.5 “Everyone’s A Winner”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing the Canadian sitcom, Check it Out, which ran in syndication from 1985 to 1988.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

This week, Bingo turns dangerous!

Episode 1.5 “Everyone’s A Winner”

(Dir by Gary Plaxton, originally aired on October 30th, 1985)

Jack Christian, the assistant manager of Cobb’s, has been assigned to oversee the store’s bingo promotion!  He has handed out over 3,000 bingo cards to all of Cobb’s customers.  Each day, a new number is drawn.  The first person to get a bingo will win a free trip to …. GREECE!

Really, Greece?  That seems kind of random, especially for a grocery store contest.  It seems like it would be easier to just give the winner a discount or even a basket of free groceries.  But no, the contest is for a free trip to Greece and everyone in Toronto is excited about it.  However, when Murray the Stockboy takes a look at the bingo cards, he notices what everyone else has missed.  All of the cards are identical.  Apparently, in order to save some money, Christian gave the printing job not to the usual company that Cobb’s uses but instead to his cousin Lenny.  And now, once the number 35 is called, 3,000 people will be demanding a free trip to Greece.

Well, that could be a problem.

Another problem is that, when two blind men shop in the store at the same time, the leashes of their service animals get tangled.  Security guard Alf untangles the leashes but he gives the wrong dog to each man.  The men don’t notice because they’re blind.  That said, one of the dogs is considerably larger than the other and that really does seem like something that one should be able to sense, even without eyesight.  The dogs lead each man to the wrong home.  One man is injured when he falls in a pool.  The other man has sex with first man’s wife three times.  Now, both men want to sue Cobb’s!  Howard’s genius solution is to give both men a shopping cart and telling them to fill it up for free.  However, the two men’s dogs end up running through the store, knocking over the bingo machine, and causing the bingo balls to scatter all over the place.

Yay!  For some reason, that means the bingo promotion is canceled and everyone totally accepts it because Canadians are nice people.  Seriously, if they tried that in the States, the store would have burned to the ground….

Actually, one of the more interesting things about Check It Out! is that the show never specifically says that it’s taking place in Canada, even though it obviously is.  Almost every member of the cast has a Canadian accent.  All of the measurements make use of the metric system.  And yet the show itself will often toss in random references to places and people in the U.S.  For instance, Edna has a sister who lives in Florida.  In this episode, Howard makes a reference to Ronald Reagan’s economic policies.  One gets the feeling that the show’s producers hoped to fool Americans watching in syndication into thinking that this very Canadian show was actually taking place in the U.S.  It reminds me a bit of how Italian actors and directors would often be credited with stereotypically “American” name in order to hide the fact that a film was an Italian production.

As for this week’s episode, Jeff Pustil’s portrayal of Christian’s growing desperation was amusing.  Most of the episode’s jokes, however, fell flat.  I’ve noticed that this show repeatedly uses the same joke structure.  Someone will say something outrageous and then Howard will repeat it in a slightly shrill tone.  It gets old after the 10tth times it happens.  Admittedly, hhere was some potential to the story.  (Check out The Office’s “Golden Ticket” episode for an example of this type of story done effectively.)  But having everything resolved via a random case of Dues Ex Machina just felt like laziness on the part of the writers.

I guess the lesson here is that you’ll have to pay your own way to Greece.

Bronson One Last Time: Death Wish V: The Face of Death (1994, directed by Allen Goldstein)

Posted on by Jedadiah Leland

To quote Geoffrey Chaucer, “All good things must come to an end.”

Death Wish V: The Face of Death marked the end of the original Death Wish franchise, concluding the violent saga of Paul Kersey 20 years after it began.  It probably should have ended sooner.

After the box office failure of Death Wish IV and the subsequent bankruptcy of Cannon Films, future plans for the Death Wish franchise were put on hold.  After the collapse of Cannon, Menahem Golan started a new production company, 21st Century Film Corporation.  In 1993, needing a hit and seeing that the previous Death Wish films were still popular on video, Golan announced that Paul Kersey would finally return in Death Wish V: The Face of Death.  Charles Bronson also returned, though he was now 72 years old and in poor health.  Death Wish V would also mark the end of Bronson’s feature film career.  He would make appearances in a few television movies before subsequently retiring from acting.

Death Wish V finds Paul in the witness protection program.  His latest girlfriend, Olivia (Lesley-Anne Down), just happens to be the ex-wife of a psychotic mobster named Tommy O’Shea (Michael Parks).  Throughout the entire franchise, the Death Wish films argued that crime is so out of control that no one was safe and that Paul had no choice but to pick up a gun and shoot muggers.  But, judging from Death Wish V, Paul just seems to have incredibly bad luck.  What are the odds that a mild-mannered architect would lose his wife, his maid, his daughter, his best friend from the war, his next two girlfriends, and then end up dating the ex-wife of New York City’s craziest gangster?

The district attorney’s office wants Olivia to testify against her ex-husband so Tommy gets his henchman, the dandruff-prone Freddie Flakes (Robert Joy), to kill her.  Looks like it’s time for New York’s favorite vigilante to launch a one-man war against the Mafia!

The only problem is that New York’s favorite vigilante is too old to chase people down dark alleys and shoot them.  He has to get creative, which means using everything from poisoned cannoli to a vat of acid to take out his targets.  One gangster is killed by an exploding soccer ball!

With both Bronson and Lesley-Anne Down giving an indifferent performances, it is up to the supporting cast to keep the movie interesting.  Appearing here after his bravura turn as Jean Renault in Twin Peaks but before Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino introduced him to a whole new generation of filmgoers, Michael Parks is flamboyantly evil as Tommy O’Shea and injects the movie with what little life that it has.  Speaking of Twin Peaks alumni, Kenneth Welsh (who played Windom Earle in the last few episodes of season 2) plays this installment’s understanding police detective.  Saul Rubinek plays the district attorney who is willing to look the other way when it comes to killing gangsters.

Dull and cheap-looking, Death Wish V was a box office bomb and it brought the original franchise to a definite end.  Will the Eli Roth/Bruce Willis reboot of Death Wish also lead to a reboot of the franchise?  Time will tell!