So, I Watched Cheerleader Camp (1988, Dir. by John Quinn)


My sister asked me to watch and review this one.  I’ll have to remember to thank her for that.

A group of cheerleaders go to a cheerleading camp for the summer.  In between all of the usual camp shenanigans, someone is killing the cheerleaders.  Alison (Betsy Russell) seems like the likeliest suspect because she keeps having weird dreams and is really possessive of her unfaithful boyfriend, Brent (Leif Garrett).  Is Alison the murderer or is she being set up?  Cheerleading is a cut-throat business so anything is possible.

As a former cheerleader, there were a few scenes that I could relate to.  Alison has the same nightmare that I used to have all through high school, where you show up for the game late, you have to put on your uniform in such a rush that you don’t even have time to put on a bra, and then you run out on the field and no one’s there.  I had that dream a hundred times.  And the movie was right about everyone making fun of the mascot.  I felt bad for Cory (Lucinda Dickey).

Overall, the movie left me with some questions.  The main one was whether or not these were supposed to be high school or college cheerleaders.  Some of them looked really old to still be in high school.  Brent had a receding hairline.  I also wondered why there was a pervy fat guy on Alison’s cheerleading squad.  There’s nothing wrong with male cheerleaders but I would not be comfortable with a male cheerleader who kept trying to see all of the other cheerleaders naked.  Finally, I wondered how everyone at the camp could be so stupid.  Why would anyone stay after the first dead body is found?  I liked Alison but even I groaned when she picked up a bloody meat cleaver.  Girl, that’s evidence!  Don’t get your fingerprints on that!  I also figured out who the murderer was after the first fifteen minutes.  It was pretty obvious.

I enjoyed cheering but I’m glad I never went to that cheerleader camp.  Most of the routines were awful and everyone ended up dead.  It’s not worth it.

6 Trailers To Help Dry Lisa’s Tears


Oh my God, yesterday sucked. 

First off, I was supposed to be seeing Capt. America but when we were standing in line to get our tickets, I started to feel dizzy and then I kinda sorta ended up fainting.  Which I know sounds like something serious but, to be honest, I faint all the time.  I’m like a Tennessee Williams heroine that way.  It’s no big deal except to my sister and my boyfriend who decided that instead of going to the movies, I should go home, lay down, rest, and “take care of myself.”  so, I told them that they were crazy and that I was perfectly fine and they were like, “You’re so full of it, Lisa Marie,” and then I stood up to show them how healthy I was and I guess I didn’t put my feet on the ground correctly because suddenly, I was going down again and anyway, long story short, I ended up being dragged back to the house.

And then once I got back home, one of my longtime twitter followers suddenly decided to unfollow me because apparently, I haven’t been a good enough friend to him.  Which I found interesting considering that I had just spent the past week literally holding his hand while he attempted to get over not one but two girls who never liked him in the first place.  So, yeah, learning that despite my best efforts, I’m apparently just a self-centered bitch who foolishly uses twitter to talk about what I want to talk about as opposed to devoting all of my time to helping some asshole deal with problems that a 12 year-old should be able to freaking handle, well, that kinda sorta hurt my feelings just a little bit.  (Contrary to popular opinion, redheads with big boobs actually do have feelings.  Go figure!) 

However, things are not a complete bust.  First off, as I type this, I’m watching the old episode of Degrassi where Emma and Alex have that huge fight in the school hallway while Paige and Spinner skip school and Ashley gets dressed up like Elvis and then Mr. Simpson finds out his cancer is in remission.  I love that episode.  And, along with watching Degrassi, I’m also putting together the latest edition of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Trailers.

Things are looking up already.

1) Last House On The Left (1972)

Yep, that’s the kind of mood I’m in.  I’m starting things off with the trailer for the evil grindhouse/drive-in movie to end all evil grindhouse/drive-in movies, the original Last House on the Left.  Why?  Because, as the trailer tells us, the road leads to nowhere…

2) Destroy All Monsters (1968)

If I do get out of my present funk, it’ll be due to trailers like this one.  It’s just so goofy! 

3) Cheerleader Camp (1988)

Erin claims that actual cheerleader camp was nothing like the cheerleader camp in this trailer. 

4) The Park Is Mine (1986)

This Canadian action film stars Tommy Lee Jones, who was also apparently in Capt.  America.  Not that I would know.

5) The Undertaker and His Pals (1966)

Believe it or not, I’ve got this one on DVD and this is one of those films that looks a lot more extreme in the trailer than it actually is.  The film itself is a collection of bad performances, juvenile humor, and silly gore effects.  The trailer looks a lot more sick than the actual film, which is why it’s a classic of grindhouse advertising.

6) It’s Alive (1974)

This is yet another trailer from the fertile mind of Larry Cohen.  It’s alive!  What is it?  It can either be your dream or your NIGHTMARE!  Much like me.